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Double Back Feedback; Mad Dawg & 4R
Topic Started: Apr 11 2015, 09:39 AM (97 Views)
Mad Dawg
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Veteran
[ *  *  *  * ]
Alright, after basically being on the shelf as far as actually trying to compete and put out quality work for over a year and a half, I'm curious to see if I've got a little bit of rust on the old bones. Instead of doing two separate threads I figured I'd just make it one for both Mad Dawg and 4R.

Anyways as far as Mad Dawg goes, I'm experimenting a bit as I'm trying as hard as I can to keep him face. I'm not trying to make it a complete character change but I'm wanting to add a little more of a comedic side to the character. He's had a bit of a dry and dark sense of humor before but I'm looking for more of an entertaining type of humor as he's trying to get under Shaun (and Quincy's) skin. So I'm curious to see how it's coming off and whether or not he's still got a face feel to him or if he's being a bit too much of a dick for a face.

With 4R I'm trying to reboot them away from their initial jobber status and the hardest part is trying to get them away from being viewed as 'Nazis'. I feel like that almost makes them feel a little cartoonish and silly feel when I'm trying to give them a more serious and mature, closer to an American History X type of vibe as supremacists. I'm trying to develop them as just two despicable and sickening souls that you absolutely want to see fail and that even the heels wouldn't want to associate with. I want them to make people uncomfortable so I'm wondering if I'm at least heading in that direction and any suggestions to achieve that would be awesome. ;)
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Sig courtesy of Lita

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Mad Dawg's Accomplishments

Dual Crown Champion
(2/12/16 - 9/24/16)

2X FIW Undisputed International Champion
(1/29/12 - 5/27/12)
(10/13/15 - 1/8/16)

Finisher of the Year 2011 - The Mauler
(Runner-Up) Feud of the Year 2011
(Runner-Up) Heel of the Year 2011
Storyline of the Month (Apr '11, June '11, Sept '11, Nov. '11, June '12)
Match of the Month (Feb. '12, June '12)

"Big Bad" Bobby Sanchez' Accomplishments

FIW Undisputed International Championship
(5/12/13 - 9/1/13)

2012 FIW Grand Prix Champion

Storyline of the Month (May '12)
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Dai
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Captain SPARKLE~!!!
Creative Team
Johan & Gunther are sleaze, so good work on that, so far.

First thing I'd do is ditch the Fourth Reich name and any swastika related imagery, and move towards more eagle/skull related iconography. Swastikas are fine in the background, but your main logo shouldn't openly evoke the nazis. Second, give Veronica a surname.

I'd also consider bringing in a Cameron Alexander/Tom Metzger type to manage them, and to try and present their ideas in a more intellectual/rational/acceptable fashion. Added bonus if he tells them to stop openly raping good, white Christian women; who should be in the kitchen, caring for the family [glaring at Veronica as he says this.] like nature intended. Obviously, he should be a massive creep, too.

And hey, that'd free up Veronica to join the Hellcat division, where she can go blame WWII being lost on Sakura or some shit.
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Lita Maivia
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Legend
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
I really like what I'm seeing from Mad Dawg. I haven't seen much of the character but I was surprised to see him giving Rock vibes in his promos. I didn't expect it but I'm liking what I'm seeing. I think he's working fantastically off of Shaun Wilson.

Dai pretty much summed up 4R fantastically. And I love the idea of Veronica joining the Hellcats. We need all we can get!
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Jimmy Jimbo
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¯\_(ツ)_/¯
[ *  *  *  * ]
RE: Mad Dawg; Dawg was fun to bounce off of this week. But reading Dawg using a sock puppet... I don't want to say it was jarring, that was definitely a surprise. I kind of had a moment where I thought "Is this something Dawg would really do? And if it is, do I really know Dawg as well as I thought I did?" But it worked and worked out well IMO.

I'm all for adding a level of comedy and trying to make your character a bit more entertaining to read. But you want to be careful and not over-do it. Dawg can still be Dawg if he cracks a couple jokes or one liners, but you don't want to get overly reliant on them or make them the driving force of the character.

One of the reasons I like Dawg is because he feels like the school bully who had an epiphany and now he's on the good side and now goes after the other bullies. He's a bully bully. :P So I really don't mind Dawg being a prick, as long as he's being a prick to people who deserve it.

If I have any recommendation, what I would do if I were roleplaying Mad Dawg, I'd hit Wikipedia or whatever creative writing 101 website and read the Anti-Hero page. That's how I see Mad Dawg. I know we have some characters who tow the line and get mixed in with gray area sometimes, but I see Dawg as THE anti-hero of FIW. He says and does whatever he wants because nobody's going to try and stop him. I know you've been roleplaying for forever and probably don't need to do any extra homework, but I'd look into different examples of anti-heroes, whether it's Steve Austin & The Sandman or it's The Punisher or even Michael Douglas in Falling Down. Look for things you could try to incorporate, whether they be subtle or obvious. Remember the old saying, "stealing from one is plagiarism, stealing from many is research." :P




RE: 4R; what a bunch of nasty bastards. :) I've spoken my piece on them in the War Room and Dai posted a lot of really good ideas there too. So you're good there, I think.
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[size0]Thanks, Lita! :)

<center><select style="font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 8pt; background-color: cc3300; font-weight: bold; color:black">
<option style="color:black">THE ROUGAROU</option>
<option> Name: </option>
<option>"The Rougarou" Silas Bergeron</option>
<option>Height:</option>
<option>6'6"</option>
<option>Weight:</option>
<option>296 lbs.</option>
<option>Hometown:</option>
<option>The Bayou</option>
<option>Entrance Music:</option>
<option>Led Zeppelin - 'When The Levee Breaks'</option>
<option>Wrestling Style:</option>
<option>Methodical Powerhouse</option>
<option>Signature Moves:</option>
<option> - Sword of Damocles </option>
<option> - Chokeslam </option>
<option> - Bayou Leg Sweep </option>
<option>Finishing Moves:</option>
<option> - Swamp Drop Brainbuster</option>
<option> - Honey Island Swamp Lock </option>
<option>Title History:</option>
<option> - 1x Fighting Spirit Champion</option>
<option>Other Cool Stuff:</option>
<option> - 2014 1st Runner Up, FIW Roleplay of the Year (Family Reunion)</option>
<option> - 2014 FIW Segment of the Year (The Rougarou Cometh)</option>
<option> - 2014 1st Runner Up, FIW Feud of the Year (vs. Mr. GEIST/Deacon DEATH)</option>
<option> - 2014 FIW Duo of the Year (w/ Butch Babineaux)</option>
<option> - 2014 1st Runner Up, FIW Newcomer of the Year</option>
<option> - 2014 & 2015 FIW Manager of the Year (Butch Babineaux)</option>
<option> </option>
<option> Now do you believe in The Rougarou? </option>
</select></center>
<center><select style="font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 8pt; background-color: cadetblue; font-weight: bold; color:black">
<option style="color:black">#SWAGOLITION</option>
<option> Name: </option>
<option>"The Condemned" Lucas Bergeron</option>
<option>Height:</option>
<option>6'4½"</option>
<option>Weight:</option>
<option>235 lbs.</option>
<option>Hometown:</option>
<option>Kandiyohi, Minnesota</option>
<option>Entrance Music:</option>
<option>Black Sabbath - 'Hole in the Sky'</option>
<option>Wrestling Style:</option>
<option>Athletic - Strong Style - Brawler</option>
<option>Signature Moves:</option>
<option> - Exploder Suplex </option>
<option> - Powerbomb </option>
<option> - German Suplex </option>
<option>Finishing Moves:</option>
<option> - The Manhattan Project</option>
<option> - Honey Island Swamp Lock </option>
<option>Title History:</option>
<option> - n/a </option>
<option>Other Cool Stuff:</option>
<option> - 2015 FIW ReVolt Match of the Year (vs. Nemesis, 6/6/15)</option>
<option> - 2015 FIW Feud of the Year (vs. Nemesis)</option>
<option> - 2015 FIW Babyface of the Year</option>
<option> - 2015 FIW Duo of the Year (w/ The Rougarou)</option>
<option> </option>
<option> Just Give The Lunatic A Chance... </option>
</select></center>
<center><select style="font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 8pt; background-color: 14b8ff; font-weight: bold; color:black">
<option style="color:black">THE MAN IN BLACK</option>
<option> Name: </option>
<option>Jim O'Brien </option>
<option>Height:</option>
<option>6'7"</option>
<option>Weight:</option>
<option>290 lbs.</option>
<option>Hometown:</option>
<option>Grant's Lick, Kentucky</option>
<option>Entrance Music:</option>
<option>Motörhead - 'Line in the Sand'</option>
<option>Wrestling Style:</option>
<option>Strong Style Powerhouse</option>
<option>Signature Moves:</option>
<option> - Belly-to-Belly Suplex</option>
<option> - Saito Suplex </option>
<option> - Jackknife Powerbomb </option>
<option> - Hells Bells-plex</option>
<option>Finishing Moves:</option>
<option> - Hells Bells</option>
<option> - F-Bomb</option>
<option>Title History:</option>
<option> - 2x Fighting Spirit Champion </option>
<option> - 1x co-holder of the FIW Tag Team Championships of the World (w/ Jorge O'Brien)</option>
<option> - 1x Ultimate Endurance Champion</option>
<option> - 1x Spirit Of Honour Champion</option>
<option> - 3x Dual Crown Champion</option>
<option> Other Cool Stuff: </option>
<option> - 2015 FIW Hall of Fame inductee</option>
<option> - 2004 TNT Superstar Of The Year</option>
<option> - 2004 Feud Of The Year (w/ Silent Rage)</option>
<option> - 2004 Match Of The Year participant (vs. Silent Rage @ FIW Genocide)
<option> - 2005 1st Runner-Up, TNT Superstar Of The Year</option>
<option> - 2005 Co-Match Of The Year participant (vs. Silent Rage @ FIW Anarchy In The UK)</option>
<option> - 2008 & 2012 Lady Luck Tournament Champion </option>
<option> - 2008 Grand Prix Tournament Champion</option>
<option> - 2008 Match of the Year participant (vs. Liam Mortell vs. Kiyoshi Nakahata @ FIW Summer of Sin) </option>
<option> - 2008 1st Runner-Up, FIW Feud of the Year participant (vs. Ash Koopa)</option>
<option> - 2008 1st Runner-Up, FIW (Face/Heel/Tweener) Turn of the Year</option>
<option> - 2009 ReVolt Match Of The Year participant (vs. Ethan Adams @ ReVolt Against The Champions X)</option>
<option> - 2009 FIW Tag Team Of The Year (The O'Brien Clan, w/ Jorge O'Brien)</option>
<option> - 2009 FIW Duo Of The Year (w/ Kendra O'Brien)</option>
<option> - April 2012 Superstar of the Month</option>
<option> - April 2012 Storyline of the Month ("Dirty Deeds...")</option>
<option> - May 2012 Superstar of the Month</option>
<option> - May 2012 Match of the Month participant (vs. Damien Holburn @ FIW Deadlock)</option>
<option> - July 2012 Co-Match of the Month participant (vs. Mad Dawg @ FIW ReVolt (07/01/12)</option>
<option> </option>
<option> So yeah, Jim was awesome. :-D </option>
</select></center>
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