Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to Full Intensity Wrestling. We hope you enjoy your visit.


You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
The Walrus Of Love
Topic Started: Jan 30 2005, 07:18 PM (51 Views)
Glen
Unregistered

*Predictably as ever, the scene opens. The large pink neon 'Karaoke' sign gives even the most stupid of viewers a clue as to where it is being set. Beams of light from the crappy disco light machine in the corner dance playfully on the surfaces of the bar in all the colours that are classified as 'primary', yes all three of them amazing I know, we really spare no expense for these FIW promos. The last few chords of 'My first, My last, My everything' are being belted out, very badly it has to be said, on stage by a fat bloke who is obviously half way to having too much to drink. Why obviously? He got up to do Karaoke. Simple. As.*

Bostock: The lady in KFC said he was going to be here. Does he not know he has a title match at Déjà Vu? (Yes Toby can speak with above his words)

Man on stage: Cheers very much! I'm 'ere all week... Tobe me ol' mate, 'ow are ya?! What'cha been up ta'?

*The fact Brighty bellowed all of this into the microphone caused massive distortion and feedback through the speaker system, smashing a few random glasses in the room spilling people's drinks all over them. Don't feel sorry for them though, feel for the 10 year-old geek in the corner with a couple of jam-jars over his eyes who happened to be sucking on one of those glass sweets you get in show-houses. Ouch*

Bostock: (Yelling) Brighty can you come down here? We need to have a chat.

Brighty: (Still into the mic) No need ta' shout mate, I can 'ear ya'!

*Brighty leaps the small distance from the stage to the floor, his fake Barry White beard flapping in his face as he does so. With a clumsy thud the 380lb Englishman lands on his feet and strolls over to where Toby and the camera monkey (Random monkey noises) are waiting*

Brighty: Alrite Tobe, what ghruie@#dae73c wanted? (Brighty took off the beard half way through what he was saying)

Bostock: We thought we would come and get your reaction on the card for the upcoming PPV, FIW Déjà Vu.

Brighty: Why ya askin’ me mate? It aint like I’m gonna be on it, the guv aint gimme a match for weeks!

Bostock: Well you are Brighty, look!

*Bostock hands Brighty a crumpled piece of paper featuring the card, presumably the one Brad used in his bitchy promo earlier. Bostock was probably in the room at the time, he's no stranger to having his face full of carpet, he’s bound to find something every now and again*

Brighty: Ultimate… Endurance? What the bloody ‘ell is that?

Bostock: It’s a new title Miss Lee is introducing. The match can only be won through submission or knockout and you’re in it’s debut match! Thoughts?

Brighty: Since when ‘ave you got good at askin’ questions Tobe? Normally you’re crap!

Bostock:

Brighty: Never mind, aint like I’m gonna win anyways. But it is nice to know the guv' aint completely forgot me, she remembered enough to stitch me up!

Bostock: Stitch you up?

Brighty: Tobe, I get knackered takin’ a piss first thin’ in the mornin’, ‘ow in buggery’s name am I gonna survive an Ultimate Endurance match against (A quick re-check of the card, despite his name Brighty aint the cleverest of blokes. Geddit?) Rage-y, Brad and… Swytch? ‘oo the bloody ‘ell is that?

Bostock: You know, Swytch.

Brighty:

Bostock: He’s been quite prominent on TNT recently.

Brighty: Nope, still dunno.

Bostock: He’s had an obsession with Miss Lee recently.

Brighty: Wait, is ‘e the purple one with that massive tail? He’s always singing those bloody annoying songs to those kids?

*Out of nowhere Brighty produces a succulent, tender, finger lickin’ good piece of chicken fried to the Colonels secret recipe of herbs and spices and begins eating. What? What kind of sponsorship deal do you think he has? There has to be a reference to it somewhere!*

Bostock: That’s Barney the dinosaur Brighty, he’s just a fictional character.

Brighty: Oh right, like Tier was?

Bostock: What are you talking about Brighty?

Brighty: You mean Tier was a real person and not some geezers creation? Blimey there are some sickos out there! Imagine a real person liking that kinda thing. You sure he’s not a character Tobe? Is that what ya sayin’?

Bostock: Err… wha… err… (Toby begins to look around nervously) Let’s get back to the match shall we? I take it this comes as a surprise to you?

Brighty: What that Tier was just a character or me being at the PPV?

Bostock: (Quite agitated now) The show Brighty, the show!

Brighty: Ok, take a chill pill mate, yeah it’s a shock, aint never been in an Endurance match before. But if I won a ladder match I reckon I might ‘ave a chance.

Bostock: You… won a ladder match? (Bostock looks Brighty up and down just checking that he is, in fact, talking to the largest, least athletic man on the entire FIW roster)

Brighty: ‘ell yeah I did! My last match as the main man on Slam! Climbed up the [reinforced] rungs and got Jackie Manson fired for good from FIW.

Bostock: But he came back.

Brighty:(Imagine an un-impressed look on a fat, un-shaven, sweaty face now multiply it by 5 and take away the number you first thought of then you have the look Brighty just shot Bostock) Just coz I’m in a different kind of match don’t mean I’m gonna change my preparation none though, don’t ya’ worry ya’ pretty little ‘ead about that Tobe me ol’ mate.

Bostock: KFC binge trip?

Brighty: You knows it!

*Brighty holds up his flabby hand for a high five, Toby goes to meet it but the 2 time FIW World Heavyweight champion pulls away at the last second before flashing a toothy smile, retribution for the Manson comment me thinks. At this point the skinny little runt of a compare steps on the stage to announce the next participant, a C Bright singing U.G.L.Y. by Daphne and Celeste*

Brighty: Gotta go Tobe, see ya at the stadium!

*With that Brighty stands bolt upright with his belly close behind. The table goes crashing but the Englishman cares not, for he is a man on a mission that being to make the annoying duo spin in the graves that was their pop career. As predictably as it started the scene fades… but not quite yet first it stays open for some general bar ambiance as the stage is set up for the big man…











































now it fades, how predictable!
Quote Post Goto Top
 
ZetaBoards - Free Forum Hosting
Free Forums. Reliable service with over 8 years of experience.
« Previous Topic · Pre-Volt PPV Roleplays · Next Topic »
Add Reply

Black Water created by tiptopolive of the Zetaboards Theme Zone