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Someone to Wachovia; Hehe
Topic Started: Feb 1 2005, 06:08 PM (48 Views)
Wigumoto
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NPC
[ *  *  *  * ]
KNOCK, KNOCK!

The loud rapping reverberates through the screen before the scene even has time to fully form. As the darkness fades away and yields to colour and light we find ourselves in one of the many locker rooms that are dotted about the arena, this one a little more fancy then most though.

KNOCK, KNOCK!!

The thumping on the door continues but is still not answered, and as we scan the room we see why. The inhabitant of this particular domicile is none other then the former Dual Crown champ, no, not that one, the other one, the former, former Dual Crown Champion, Chris Maclay. Well, we assume it’s him, the body fits, the dress, the hairy arms, but his face is shielded by a comic resting lightly on his face and moving gently up and down as he breaths.

KNOCK, KNOCK KNOCKITY KNOCK!!!

That did it. One final burst of bone on wood arouses the sleeping beast from his slumber. He jumps up, the comic book dropping into his lap as he looks around the room, confused as to what’s going on. He looks down at the comic and grumbles to himself.

Maclay: Urgh, I drooled all over Spider-Woman.

KNOCK, KNOCK!!!

He turns toward the source of the noise, the source of his awakening, and rather angrily pulls himself to his feet. He charges over to the door and tears it open, startling the ever nervous Toby Bostock as he does so.

Maclay: WHAT?

Toby: Erm, I…wanted interview…’cos…pay per view.

Maclay: Well that’s barely a sentence but I’ll allow it.

He turns and walks back over to the couch wiping the sleep from his eyes as he goes. He gets as far as the coffee table before he realises that the scrawny fan boy has failed to follow him.

Maclay: Well come on Shirley I haven’t got all day.

Toby skitters into the room, closing the door behind him as his interviewee takes a seat. Toby does likewise, crossing his legs and resting his clipboard on them in a bid to look to professional. It doesn’t work.

Toby: Well I’ll try not to keep you too long, I’m sure you have important things to be getting on with.

Maclay: I have.

TV: PLAYER ONE HAS ENTERED THE GAME!

The booming voice emanating from the screen draws Toby’s attention toward the controller clutched within Maclay’s hands. Despite this he battles on with his first question.

Toby: So, did you happen to catch Kennedy’s promo earlier?

Maclay: Did she mention me?

Toby: Briefly, near the end.

TV: PAUSED!

Maclay turns to young Bostock, who has brought his pen to his lips and has furrowed his brow in an effort to look interested in whatever his interviewee has to say, the Essex Beast however looks mildly annoyed.

Maclay: Briefly? Near the end? So I’m just an afterthought to her now? Something that can be disregarded? I bet she went on and on about old Carly Kane though didn’t she.

Toby gives a feeble nod, not wanting to arouse his anger further.

Maclay: Yeah I bet she did. Well that’s fine, she can overlook me if she wants but that doesn’t mean I’ll go away. Her and her little boy toy have more then “The Hype” to worry about come Sunday.

TV: FIGHT!

He turns back to the television screen and takes out his frustration on some unsuspecting mass of colourful pixels.

Toby: Don’t you think you and Hype are at a disadvantage? I mean, Kennedy and Max are…friends, they’ve teamed together before, and you and Hype are…not so much friends. The phrase nemeses springs to mind. How will you function as a team?

Maclay doesn’t even bother pausing his game this time, he simply replies while staring into the tv and bashing buttons.

Maclay: We don’t need to. You’re right, Max and Kennedy have teamed together before, against me. Now, remind me Margaret, who won that match?

Toby: Er, erm, let me check my --

Maclay: It was me, monkey nuts, I won. I beat them both, AT. THE SAME. TIME. Whether me and Kane can work together is of no consequence because, Laverne, I can beat both of them all by myself. In fact Hype might as well take the night off, go see a show, get freaky with his bitches or whatever he does.

Toby looks a little disgruntled as he finishes flicking through the notes clipped to his board.

Toby: So we’re back to calling me girl’s names. I thought we were over that.

Maclay: You know, you’re right, we were over that. That was immature and stupid of me, I’m sorry, Toby. In fact…

TV: PAUSED!

Maclay: Why don’t you come over here and give me a big ol’ hug. Come on, don’t be shy.

Toby looks a little hesitant at first, but then a smile spreads across his face and he leans in for a big, warm, friendly --

Maclay: Oh would ya sit down ya jackass!

The Beast turns back to his game as Toby flops down into his chair feeling all dejected. He soldiers on with his questions though, what a little trooper he is.

Toby: So, ok, you beat them in a handicap match, but didn’t you have Hype distracting them?

Maclay: Ya know what, Shaniqua, I did. He came down and tried to suck Kennedy’s toes if I remember correctly. And if he feels like doing a bit of distracting on Sunday then he’s more then welcome to. He can stand on the apron and waves his arms about, stand on the floor and wave his arms about, stand on the walkway and wave his arms about, whatever he feels like doing. As long as he doesn’t get in my way he can take off his pants and swing them around his head singing “Come on Ilene” for all I care.

Toby blinks a few times as he tries to remove that image from his brain before trying to get back to the questions.

Toby: Erm, well do you --

Maclay: Ya know what Hilary? I’d love to sit and chat all day with you, bake cupcakes, braid each other’s hair and the like, but I have important things I need to do today, like saving the world from the threat of alien zombie monkeys. So if you don’t mind…

Bostock sits there for a moment, unsure of what to do next until…

Maclay: Go on, shoo, SHOO!

Maclay waves him away like some sort of pest and the interviewer scoots off toward the door and out into the hallway like a scolded cat, leaving Maclay to his horde of invading monkey zombies.
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