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Tuesday Night Throwdown; April 25, 2006
Topic Started: Apr 25 2006, 10:05 PM (208 Views)
Lita Maivia
Member Avatar
Legend
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Back on American soil, or concrete as the case may be as a set of wheels screech to a stop between a set of white lines painted on the ground. The engine hums to a stop and a few seconds later the doors swing opening, ushering the passengers out into the poorly lit underground car park.

“Told you we’d get here on time.”

We pan up to reveal Remy Barteaux, smiling smarmily at his girl who is more then just a friend, April Lynn, who seems less amused by her Cajun’s driving antics.

April: I’m pretty sure we ran a light. Red means stop in New Orleans too, right?

Remy chuckles off the barb as he pops the trunk and circles round to the back of the vehicle. He roots around, pulling out two gym bags packed with the bare essentials, though as April moves to take her, Remy tugs it away.

Remy: An’ what kinda gentleman would Ah be if Ah let dha lady carry her own t’ings.

April: Very chivalrous of you, but I can handle my own.

She sidles up to him, much closer then she needs to in fact, rubbing against him as she reaches an arm out and plucks her bag from his grasp. She smiles as she steps back and hitches it up over her shoulder, and her smile is reflected in Remy’s pants, I mean on his face, his face.

April: Besides, you a gentleman?

Remy: Hey, Ah’m very gentlemanly, Ah held all dhem doors open for you.

April: Only so you could check out my ass.

Remy: It’s a nice ass.

April: Damn straight.

She turns toward the elevator that will take them both up into the main cavity of the building, knowing full well where his eyes have just drifted to, but he skips forward a few steps to catch up.

The two share a chuckle and a few longing glances as they stroll through the concrete cavern, slowly closing in on their destination when suddenly Remy stops. He pats himself down frantically as April turns and watches bemused.

April: Forget something?

Remy: Mah keys, locker room ones. Must’a left ‘em in dha car.

He eyes dart about himself as he searches himself, but eventually land on April’s beautiful face. He smiles softly as he brings his hands up to her waist and pulls her in.

Remy: Go ahead, Ah’ll catch up.

They share a brief kiss…ok, not so brief…jeeze, get a room. Eventually they break and April backs up a few steps, keeping their eyes locked before she turns and heads for the lifts. Remy turns too, but not before watching her leave a little, noting the slight wiggle in her walk put in for the sole reason that she’s knows he’s watching.

The car park floods with light briefly as the doors open and April steps in, then is plunged back into dingy darkness as the doors close and leave Remy alone in the car park. Or so he thinks.

As he walks back toward the car, a faint sound draws his attention. The sound of a tin can bobbing along the concrete floor. He stops, the cautious thief instinct in him taking president as he surveys his surroundings, but his eyes are drawn downward as the can rolls up against his foot. He looks over into the shadows, and spots an old friend.


Riggs: Little help?

Anger, pure and simple, well up within his entire body. His bag drops to the ground as he turns on his heals and marches toward the smarmy little bastard.

Remy: Oh Ah’m glad you’re here, ‘cos Ah don’t believe you got enough of a beating last time…

His voice trails and his progress comes to a halt as Riggs waves a hand, conjuring two men to join him from either side. One tall, yet ropey, the other shorter, yet far wider and brimming with what one assumes to be muscle.

Riggs: Did ya think I’d come alone? After what happened in England? Really mate, I think you’ve caught blonde from ya little tart. Wear protection next time.

Remy moves to lunge forward but common sense halts him in place. No way he’s getting to Riggs with those two heavies in the way, so for now he stands his ground.

Remy: What do you want?

Riggs: What do I want?

Riggs parrots his question back to him as he pulls himself up onto the hood a nearby car, making himself nice and comfy as he talks.

Riggs: Lesse, what do I want? Hmm. England to win the World Cup, half an hour alone with Liv Tyler, a decent steak and kidney pie in this god forsaken country. But I guess, right now, if I had to choose one thing…I’d go with watching these two beat you to a twitchy pulp. Lads.

On his command, lanky and muscle head move in for the kill, sick little grins on their faces as they envision tearing the Cajun apart. Remy takes up a defensive stance as the two men close in. He swipes at skinny, who dodges with ease, then at muscles, who ducks back just enough to avoid getting kicked in the head. They hesitate, trying to pick their spot, and skinny charges in! But Remy catches him and whips him off into a nearby car. The alarm sounds as the grunt’s back arches around the shape of the trunk and he grimaces in the pain of metal meeting flesh and bone. The big guy tries his luck but takes a roundhouse kick to the chops that sends him staggering backwards into dream street. And then Remy sets his eyes on Riggs.

The slimy limy looks a tad perturbed as the Cajun approaches, but a smile settles back in as skinny boy runs in with a forearm to the back or Remy’s head, knocking him forward and into the arms of the big guy. Remy looks up at him, struggling to free himself from his vice like grip but with no avail. The big fella just smiles, and then…

THUNK!

…and then his eyes roll back in his head and he releases his grip. To Remy’s surprise, the big guy flops down to the concrete, and standing behind him, fists netted together in one huge wad of muscle and knuckle…is Carl! He looks down at the slumped body of the thug, then back up into Remy’s face.

Remy: Your timing, rules!

Carl smiles, though his expression quickly shifts as he nods toward the skinny dude coming up behind his friend. Remy takes the signal and spins round, CRACKING his boot off the guy’s temple with another spinning roundhouse.
Skinny drops as quick as his friend, and Remy turns back to find Riggs…gone.

Remy: Dammit. Slimy little…huh?

He looks up to see Carl pointing at his watch.

Remy: Merde.

Remy retrieves his bag and the two men rush into the elevator, but it can’t move fast enough for our late Cajun. As the bell dings and the doors slide open, Remy sprints out…but manages to stop himself before he collides with Madison Lee.

Madison: You’re late.

Remy: Ah know but --

Madiosn: You’re up now. There’s no time for you to change, you’ll just have to get out there.

Remy glares at the general manager as she smiles back, the very picture of smugness. Both men take to sprinting once more as Remy bypasses his locker room and heads straight for the ring, casual clothes and all.

[align=center]Rolling Suicide[/align]

The sound of drum sticks clicking together is heard, and Daron Malakian’s guitar part kicks in as System of a Down’s “Chop Suey!” accompanies the images flashing on the screen, in time with the rhythm. Images of Madison Lee, Kennedy, Swytch, Kailey Lane, Dante Coles, Ragin', and Jim O'Brien all appear on the screen, as the drum beat becomes louder, and the riff escalates!

[align=center]Wake Up![/align]

Madison Lee stares down the camera, raising her chin defiantly.

[align=center]Grab a brush and put a little makeup[/align]

Swytch yanks the steel chair from the referee's hands as Kennedy tries again to reclaim her feet. Tony Clarke moves up on Swytch JUST AS HE BLASTS KENNEDY IN THE FACE WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!!

[align=center]Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup,

*Whispered* Hide the scars to fade away the…
[/align]

Kailey sprints off the ropes, purposely right where Madison is, SMACKING THE GM WITH A BACK ELBOW!! Madison goes flying off the apron and crashes to the floor at ringside! Kailey runs at Nadia as the Russian is climbing back up! Kailey takes Nadia over with a headscissors-- NO! Kailey spins all the way around and BRINGS NADIA DOWN WITH A DDT!!!

[align=center]Why dya leave the keys upon the table,

Here ya go create another fable!
[/align]

The cage suddenly ignites as Swytch flips away, setting the entire structure ablaze! Swytch completes his split-legged moonsault thanks to the longer fall and COLLIDES with Tier, GRINDING his body into the thumbtacks!!

[align=center]You wanted to!

Grab a brush and put a little makeup
[/align]

Kendra spins her opponent around, hooks her up and THROWS HER OVER HER HEAD WITH A WRIST-CLUTCH EXPLODER!!!

[align=center]You wanted to!

Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup
[/align]

Graver moves toward April and plunks her on the top rope in a sitting position before he himself climbs to the second rope, standing her up and grabbing her around the neck. Unfortunately, this “Big BAM!” never happens, as April shoves Graver off and he stumbles to the mat. He turns around, pissed-off, but it doesn’t last as April CAREENS off the top rope and DRIVES HIS FACE INTO THE MAT WITH A BULLDOG!!

[align=center]You wanted to!

Why dya leave the keys upon the table?
[/align]

Swytch runs at Maclay just as he spins around, then jumps onto his shoulders BUT MACLAY DUCKS HIS HEAD DOWN!! MACLAY STANDS UP HANGING SWYTCH DOWN HIS BACK AND HOOKS SWYTCH’S LEGS UP!! Maclay lets out a bestial cry AND STEPS OFF THE WALKWAY… BUT THE CROWD EXPLODES AS SWYTCH GRABS HOLD OF THE WALKWAY AND MACLAY CRASHES DOWN ASS FIRST ON THE CANVAS!!

[align=center]You wanted to![/align]

The music slows down, as a slow-mo image of Kennedy's foot connecting with Dante's head in a JFK is shown.

[align=center]I don’t think you trust, in, my, self righteous suicide…[/align]

Alex spins him around, boots Loon in the midsection and DROPS HIM WITH A SPINNING KI-KRUSHER MANEUVER! Alex pops back up to his feet, raising his arms in the air

[align=center] I, cry, when angels deserve to DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE![/align]

The riff increases in volume again, as John Dolmayan batters the sh*t out of his drumkit!

At the exact same time as Kailey is dodging Natalya, Ragin’ steps between the ropes. Kailey turns quickly almost bumping into Ragin’ and their eyes meet. The steel chair swings, seemingly in slow motion to all who are watching. His eyes never leave Kailey, her face scrunching up to brace for the impact. But it never comes. She opens her eyes as she hears the loud crack and the ‘ohhhhh!’ from the fans. She turns to see Natalya laying flat out moments after the sickening impact.

Even with the mask on, you know Oni's gotta be smiling ear to ear with that manuever. He raises a fist to the air, nodding in self appreciation of his work. He grabs ahold of Shannon and brings him to his feet. He scoops Shannon up INTO AN ARGENTINE BACKBREAKER!

Swytch rears back with the steel chair, aiming at Kennedy's head and CRACKS STEEL AGAINST STEEL AS KENNEDY DUCKS ASIDE! The steel chair clatters to the ringside mats as Swytch's hands throb from the impact! Kennedy leaps up onto the steel steps and jumps onto Swytch's shoulders, DRIVING HIS HEAD INTO THE FLOOR WITH A HURRACANRANA!

[align=center]ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Wake Up!

*Whispered* Wake up
[/align]

Dante climbs up to his feet and pulls Ragin’ up, tucking his head between his legs. Kailey is on the floor, screaming at Dante to get back in the ring. Dante looks down at her and that’s a mistake BECAUSE RAGIN’ RISES UP SENDING DANTE OVER WITH A BACKDROP AND CRASHING BACK DOWN THROUGH THE JAPANESE ANNOUNCE DESK!!

[align=center]Grab a brush and put a little makeup[/align]

Remy runs toward Rick almost from behind AND HE PLANTS HIS LEG AND WHACKS RICK ACROSS THE BACK OF THE HEAD WITH THE BOURBON STREET BLUES!

Ninja scribbles on his sign on the top rope before holding it up for all to see… "DANGEROUS~~!!!" The crowd go crazy as Melanie turns around just in time for Ninja perform a SHOOTING STAR PRESS ONTO HER!! Both crash to the canvas, Ninja on top and Melanie on the bottom!

[align=center]Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup[/align]

Dante thinks quickly and drives the point of his elbow between Hype’s shoulder blades!! He rehooks the arm THEN DRAGS HYPE OVER THE LADDER AND DRIVES HIM ALL THE WAY TO THE FLOOR DRILLING HIS SKULL INTO THE FLOOR!!

[align=center]Why dya leave the keys upon the table[/align]

Jim hits a knee into his opponent's midsection, escaping the chancerie. Jim swiftly gets behind, locking in a double chickenwing AND WITH GREAT STRENGTH and FORCE, JIM LAUNCHES THE OPPONENT WITH A TIGER SUPLEX! THE OPPONENT LANDS HEAD FIRST INTO THE RING STEPS AT A SICK, SICK ANGLE!

[align=center]Here ya go create another fable!

You wanted to!
[/align]

Maclay gets to his feet and pulls Swytch up. He ducks his head down and lifts Swytch up draping him down his back. Maclay’s lips curl into a grin as he hangs onto Swytch’s leg, but Swytch digs down and tries to fight back. He straightens his back and tries to punch Maclay in the back, but that only angers the beast further. Maclay tries to get Swytch back into position but Swytch snaps his torso down FLIPPING MACLAY AROUND AND DRIVING HIM THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE DESK WITH A FLIPPING PILEDRIVER!!

[align=center]Grab a brush and put a little makeup

You wanted to!
[/align]

Once Graver is at a steady enough vertical base, APRIL LEAPS FROM THE TURNBUCKLE AND CONNECTS WITH A SOMERSAULT SEATED SENTON PN GRAVER!

[align=center]Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup

You wanted to!
[/align]

Dante bounces off the far ropes and rushes back across the ring THEN LEAPS OVER THE TOP ROPE AND CRASHES THROUGH MACLAY AND THE TABLE TO THE FLOOR!!

[align=center]Why dya leave the keys upon the table

You wanted to!
[/align]

Kennedy bounces off the ropes and leaps up and spins around going into a wheel barrow position. She pushes off the canvas and grabs Ragin’ around the head, but he ducks his head out of her grasp and sits out PLANTING KENNEDY FACE FIRST INTO THE MAT WITH A SITOUT FACEBUSTER!!

[align=center]I don’t think you trust, in, my, self righteous suicide…[/align]

With Dante standing on shakily, Maclay ducks his head down between Dante’s legs. He starts to rise but gets a forearm shot in his kidneys! Dante raises his arm up AND HAMMERS ANOTHER SHOT TO MACLAY’S KIDNEYS!! The Essex Beast falters a bit and Dante hooks him around the waist then hoists Maclay up AND POWERBOMBS HIM THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE DESK!!

[align=center] I, cry, when angels deserve to dieeeeeeeeeeeee, in, my self righteous suicide…..[/align]

Kailey runs in and butts the extinguisher into Nadia's stomach, doubling her over! Kailey throws the extinguisher aside before shoving Nadia's head between her legs. Kailey glances out into the crowd before hoisting Nadia up in a Crucifix! Kailey sits out DROPPING NADIA FACE-FIRST INTO THE CANVAS WITH A CRUCIFIX REVERSE FACE DRIVER!!

[align=center]…I cry, when angels deserve to Die.[/align]

The riff perks up again… BAMMM!!!!!!! THE COMMENTATORS GASP FOR AIR AS DANTE LIFTS JIM UP BY HIS OWN ARM AND HIS BRITCHES, CAUSING JIM TO RELIEVE SOME OF THE PAIN AS DANTE SPINS AND DROPS JIM RIGHT DOWN ON HIS HEAD WITH THE SICKEST FUCKING FALL FROM GRACE YOU’VE EVER FUCKING SEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Snatching Onikage by his leather mask Jim runs his thumb across his throat and shouts out “BURNING! HAMMER!” The fans go into frenzy as Jim lifts Onikage up onto his shoulders and sets him up. The Monster of TNT walks around with Onikage on his shoulders for a few seconds to allow each side of the arena to see it. He then drives Onikage skull first into the canvas with the Burning Hammer!

Maclay pulls Swytch into a side headlock and starts to climb the ladder, dragging Swytch up behind him. Step by step, rung by rung, Maclay pulls Swytch toward the top of the ladder. Maclay reaches the second to top step, carefully sharing half of it with Swytch. Maclay ducks his head down… and tucks his head between Swytch’s legs… Maclay starts to rise up… BUT SWYTCH FLIPS HIS LEGS AROUND AND GRABS MACLAY AROUND THE NECK, DRAGGING HIM OFF THE LADDER AND DRILLING HIS SKULL INTO THE MAT!!

The riff continues, until it stops dead, and the fans can be heard to cheering in the background, as the TNT Logo flashes up on the screen…


[align=center]Posted Image[/align]

“Shatter” tears through the speakers and signals the entrance of TNT’s very own Ragin’ Cajun. He appears onstage, a silhouette against the light that emanates from the entrance…

[align=center]“Coming around my senses torn
Its no illusion its here everyday I bleed
As long as you see it as long as you know
As long as you fake it nobody knows”
[/align]

JH: Welcome ladies and gentlemen to Tuesday Night Throwdown! We are live in the WVU Coliseum in Morgantown, West Virginia!

TM: Looks like we're kicking the night off with a match. And not the match we thought we would.

MA: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for ONE fall! Introducing first, from New Orleans, Louisiana… RRRREEMY BARRRRTOOOOOOOOOHHH!!!

The silent giant, Carl Lucas steps out behind him, shadowing him with that stoic, unwavering expression that he’s made his trademark as the two make their way along the raised walkway. Remy sighs and rubs the back of his neck before reaching the ring and stepping through the ropes. He leans against the turnbuckle, shaking his head before stripping off his shirt.

JH: Remy doesn’t look like his head’s completely in the game tonight.

TM: Which of course means the cowboy is going to eat him alive.

JH: I don’t know if Remy’ll fit through the mesh in his mask.

[align=center]“Breeeeeeak dooooown again, I’m suffering
My heeeeeeads ooooout of sync, and I can’t hide the pain”
[/align]

Carl moves to a neutral position at ringside as Remy turns to face the entranceway. He warms up, stretching his legs, cracking his neck from side to side and waiting for the start of the match.

[align=center]"Hey amigos . . ."[/align]

Rich mariachi music begins to play, scintillating the crowd with the promise of something spicy. However, nothing spicy this way comes as the lights cut and the entryway is illuminated a dusty yellow. The giant shape of the skull cowboy lumbers onstage as Rammstein's familiar thundering guitars kick in. He stands with his legs shoulder width apart and his head bowed.

MA: And his opponent… he is one half of the FIW Tag-Team Champions… the SKULLLLL… COOOOOOWWWWWBOOOOOOOYYYY!!!

A caw is heard and a huge raven flies down from the rafters, lighting on the cowboy's left shoulder. He dredges toward the ring with methodical slowness, paying no mind to the fans as they cheer both ways on either side of him.

TM: No matter how many times I see him, Hitchen, this guy is just damn scary.

JH: I can’t argue with you on that. He’s an impressive physical specimen, and he certainly has an intimidating air.

He steps below the top rope, the raven giving another cry before it flaps to the near turnbuckle. The cowboy removes his hat and coat, setting them in his corner and staring a hole through his opponent with his nothing eyes.

Logan black calls for the bell, and the match begins, tension hot in the arena as the fans wait to see what happens. Remy beckons for the cowboy to approach him, sure of himself and hopping on his toes.

JH: You’ve gotta wonder what kind of shape Remy’s in. It wasn’t too bad of an assault he suffered, but still… that attack before his match could’ve done some damage to him.

TM: Plus he’s in his street clothes, so y’know. Less flexibility for kicks and such.

JH: Indeed. Most people don’t realize how hard it is to wrestle out of your preferred wrestling attire.

Once again, Remy beckons the cowboy come at him, but the giant just stands there, ignoring the Cajun. Remy finally gives in and approaches the cowboy, staring nose-to-chest with him. The cowboy tilts his head downward to look at Remy, who SHOVES THE COWBOY IN THE CHEST!!

JH: GOOD LORD! What a simple display of disrespect!

TM: Remy should watch it, just ‘cuz the cowboy isn’t after him doesn’t mean--

BAM! Remy is FLOORED by a stiff-armed clothesline! … or he would be if he hadn’t ducked and swept around to cowboy’s back! Remy snares the cowboy’s arm and leg, and PULLS backward for a Russian leg sweep! … and PULLLLS backward for a Russian leg sweep! … PUUUUULLLS backward!

TM: Yeah, it’s not happenin’, kid. Just give it up while you still can.

The cowboy stares down into Remy’s face before wrapping his hand around his throat and yanking him away. The cowboy shoves Remy toward the center of the ring where he JAMS A FIST INTO REMY’S NECKPIPE!!

TM: Throat punch from cowboy! This match doesn’t look good at ALL for Remy!

JH: I wish I could say differently, Thomas. Cowboy’s a lot bigger than Remy, and I’m afraid Remy just doesn’t have much of a chance in there tonight.

Remy manages to stay standing, but he’s holding his Adam’s apple in sheer anguish, backing toward the turnbuckle. This serves the cowboy just fine, as he moves toward that turnbuckle to grapple Remy. The young Cajun manages to avoid this, however, by quickly nipping off the second rope and CRACKING A ROUNDHOUSE ACROSS COWBOY’S NUGGET!!

JH: Impressive roundhouse kick!

Cowboy stumbles back, shaking his head. He CHARGES toward Remy with the intent to squash, but Remy slides out of the way and cowboy gets a chestful of turnbuckle.

JH: That’s it, Remy! You’ve gotta use your speed to outwit this cowboy!

TM: He’s not fast, sure, but there’s no real running in a wrestling match, Hitchen. Eventually, the cowboy’s gonna catch him, and when he does it’s all over.

Cowboy turns around, and gets to watch Remy for a split-second before he THUNDERS into the giant with a flying elbow smash!

JH: And Remy ROCKETS an elbow to the cowboy’s head!

TM: He’s still standing, though, Hitchen! And I don’t see Remy being able to pull that trick again!

JH: The cowboy isn’t stupid, that’s for sure, but Remy is an accomplished thief, as we well know. You’ve gotta be smart for that line of work.

Remy moves to the side of the cowboy as he rises, running and rebounding off the ropes again. He JUMPS into the air for another elbow, AND THE COWBOY CATCHES HIM!! He uses not only his own strength, but Remy’s momentum and POWERSLAMS HIM into the canvas!!

TM: HA! What’d I just say? Don’t try the trick twice, Remy!

JH: That was one hell of a powerslam counter from the skull cowboy! I felt it from all the way over here!

Cowboy moves to tower over Mr. Barteaux. He reaches down and puts both big hands around Remy’s throat, RIPPING him up off the canvas and dangling him in the air!!

JH: What strength! What power!

The cowboy then DROPS into a sitting position, SHATTERING Remy’s spine against the mat!

TM: What a two-handed choke slam! Raising the Dead! WHOO!

Cowboy walks away from Remy, keeping his face pointed in that direction as though surveying him, or waiting for him to rise. On the outside, Carl hits the apron, urging his best friend to get up. Remy eventually curls into a sitting position, shaking his head free of cobwebs and dust before GETTING A BOOT DROPPED RIGHT INTO HIS CRANIUM!!!

JH: GOOD GOD!

TM: One hell of a low-flying big boot! That just knocked Remy freakin’ senseless!

The cowboy pulls Remy off the mat and scoops him up, turning and FALLING into a resonating scoop slam! Remy bounces off the mat a bit, flopping onto his front. The cowboy pushes up to his knees, then stands tall.

TM: I just don’t see it, Hitchen. There’s no WAY Remy can make it out of this match alive. The cowboy’s got him right where he wants him.

The cowboy does indeed. He leans down over Remy’s still form, AND GETS A QUICK THUMB TO THE EYE FOR HIS TROUBLES!!

TM: WHAT THE FUCK!?

JH: Remy Barteaux equalizing this match!

TM: EQUALIZING!? Whenever anyone I like does that you say they’re cheating!

It seems Logan Black missed the thumb to the eye, but he’s not dumb enough to wonder why cowboy has pulled back with a palm over his socket. He gets in the rising Cajun’s face, pointing fingers and laying accusations. Remy feigns innocence, but gets SNARED from behind by cowboy!

TM: Here it is! This’s the price you pay for poking cowboy in his… uh… eye socket!

Cowboy WRENCHES Remy upward for a German suplex, but instead he DRIVES THE CAJUN DOWN ON HIS KNEE!!

TM: GERMAAAAANNNN ATOMIIIC DROOOOOOP!!!

Remy’s eyes water as he holds his assbone in pain, stumbling forward into the corner. The second Remy turns around, cowboy rushes forward with a CACOPHONOUS knee strike! Remy is RATTLED against the pads and ropes, and he slumps down into a sitting position, tired from having the air squeezed out of him.

JH: Remy just plain isn’t looking good in this match. Jumped before the show, hounded by Madison… I feel sorry for him, I really do.

TM: Don’t bother, Hitchen. You don’t want Madison to put YOU in a punishment match, do you?

JH: Certainly not if it’s against the cowboy. This man’s like a one-person wrecking crew!

The cowboy stalks to the other side of the ring, then CHARGES forward, lifting his leg at near the last second to SPIKE into Remy’s skull! BUT NO! BARTEAUX MOVES OUT OF THE WAY, and the cowboy gets tangled in the turnbuckle!

JH: Here we go! Another great chance for Remy to take an upper hand!

TM: It’s just not gonna happen, Hitchen.

Remy gets quite close to the cowboy, who is now about at his level due to the leg predicament he can’t seem to free himself of. Remy ROCKETS a roundhouse kick to the cowboy’s visage, then spins and sends ANOTHER right across the cheekbone of the skull mask! Remy backs against the ropes, pushes off for momentum and raises his leg--

JH: MOB HIT!!!

NO!! Cowboy ducks it and pushes both hands up, SHOVING Remy backwards! The force sees Remy flopping back-first onto the mat, and it gives cowboy the much-needed time to free his leg from between the ropes. Finally loose, the cowboy turns on Remy, who is once again standing.

TM: Good! Cowboy and Remy are on even ground again!

JH: How can you say “even”, Thomas? The skull cowboy has nine inches and one hundred thirty pounds over Remy!

TM: Any ground that slants in my favor is even ground, Hitchen. You should know that by now.

Cowboy stares holes through Remy, but the Cajun doesn’t back down. He sticks out his jaw and shakes his head, waiting for the cowboy to come to him. Cowboy obliges, full-force, as he uses his ENTIRE BODY as a weapon against Remy, shoulder-blocking him STIFFLY and knocking him to the canvas!

TM: HA! With that kinda weapon it’s hard to miss, eh Hitchen?

JH: I can’t argue with that, Thomas. It’s just far too easy for the cowboy to dominate a match.

Cowboy backs up a pace or two, takes a running step and PUNTS Remy in the damn kidney, LITERALLY sending him off the mat a few inches!

TM: Oohhhhhh, that hurt over HERE, Johnathan! Remy’s gonna be pissing blood for weeks!

Cowboy descends on the wounded Remy and pulls him to his feet by the hair. He whips Remy toward the ropes and catches him with a flapjack on the rebound, but instead of slamming him face-first into the mat, the cowboy reaches up and pulls him by the buttocks into a falling powerbomb!

TM: GHOST RIDER!! Cowboy is just executing move after move on Remy here!

JH: Remy’s got his kicks in, he’s got his licks in! If he finds an opening, he still has--

TM: Absolutely no chance, Hitchen. Ab-so-lutely no chance. Period. Fullstop. Whatever the fuck it is you Brits say.

The cowboy rises, Remy in tow, and forces the Cajun’s head between his legs. Apparently one powerbomb is not enough to sate the cowboy’s appetite for destruction, and he swings Remy upward to sit on his shoulders.

TM: What’d I tell ya, Hitchen? This is the end! We’re gonna see the Bombamuerte and--

But wait! Remy is conscious! He wraps an arm around the cowboy’s head, and doesn’t let go!

JH: HA! What was that you were saying, Thomas?

Remy wriggles a leg free and lands a STIFF knee shot to cowboy’s face! And another! And ANOTHER! Cowboy is being thrown off-balance by all the kicking, and he leans forward to finish the job with a powerbomb, but Remy PULLLS WITH ALL HIS MIGHT, and DRIVES THE SKULL COWBOY’S HEAD INTO THE MATS WITH A SPIKING DDT!!!

JH: DDT!!! DDT!!! DDT REVERSAL FROM REMY BARTEAUX!!!

TM: FUCK! FUCK!!

Remy staggers to his feet with the crowd behind him and stands on the cowboy’s back, before flipping almost awkwardly into a STRONG moonsault!

JH: REMY-SAULT!!!

The Cajun shakes his head, indicating he’s not done! He stands on cowboy’s back again, this time with a bit more composure, and SPRINGS forward to the turnbuckle, springboards off the second rope, and DRIVES A MOONSAULT INTO COWBOY’S SPINE!!!

JH: And another!

TM: Dammit! Someone stop this! Where the hell is cowboy’s tag-team partner!?

JH: Outside cheering for his best friend!

Remy foregos the back-standing and just climbs the turnbuckle, signaling to the fans before FLIPPING BACKWARD AND PUTTING HIS 225 POUNDS ON COWBOY’S SPINE!! The crowd EXPLODES with cheers as Remy raises his fists in victory, nodding and smiling!

JH: An AMAZING tripe jump moonsault from Remy Barteaux! He might just take this match yet!

Remy pulls off the impressive feat of not only hauling cowboy to a vertical-ish base, but WHIPS him into the ropes! Cowboy rebounds, AND EATS A FACEFUL OF YAKUZA KICK!!

JH: THE MOB HIT!!!

The crowd is on their FEET cheering for the ragin’ Cajun!

TM: DAMMIT!! DAMN YOU, REMY!!

Remy smiles, feeling he’s got this one in the bag… WHEN THE COWBOY SITS STRAIGHT THE FUCK UP!!!

JH: GOOD LORD!! HOW CAN HE DO THAT!?!?

TM: YES!! YES!!! TAKE HIM OUT!!

Remy stares slack-jawed and bug-eyed at the cowboy who turns his head slowly and methodically toward Remy. Remy gets a determined steel grimace, and RUSHES forward, raising his boot to send a SECOND Yakuza kick to the cowboy’s skull!!

JH: AND A SECOND MOB HIT!!

TM: NOOO!!

The cowboy FLATTENS against the canvas, and Remy quickly grabs a tree trunk-like leg and rolls him up for the pin!


[align=center]ONE!





TWO!!





THREE!!!
[/align]





JH: YES!!! HE DID IT!! HE DID IT!! REMY DID IT!!

Remy stands up tall as Logan Black reluctantly raises his hand in victory!

MA: Your winner… by pinfall… RRRRREEMYYY… BARRRRRTOOOOOOOHHHHH!!!

JH: What an accomplishment! Remy Barteaux is the FIRST person to enjoy a pinfall victory… hell, any DIRECT victory over the skull cowboy! WHAT an impact!

TM: You don’t have to rub it in, Hitchen. In fact, shut up. I just don’t wanna hear about it.

JH: You can’t ignore the cheers of these fans, Thomas! Remy has toppled impossible odds and come out on top!

The camera pulls back revealing a monitor as Remy celebrates his win over the skull cowboy. A playing card flies into the picture, exploding on impact with the television…err, wait, no, it just hits the television screen and falls to the floor.

Dante: Nice one, Madison. That worked out so well.

Madison: Shut up. It wasn’t supposed to work like that.

Dante swivels his chair around, propping his shoes on Madison’s desk. She looks at the black Italian leather resting on her desk and shakes her head.

Madison: I didn’t see you come up with a better idea.

Dante: That’s because ideas and evil schemes are your department. I’m just along for the ride.

Madison sighs, rising from her seat and circling around the desk. She pushes Dante’s feet off the desktop and plants and her shapely ass on the corner of the desk.

Madison: Then why don’t you quit free loading and help out then. Or would that be asking too much?

Dante looks up from the deck of cards in his hands he’d been shuffling. He leans forward and places the cards on the desk then looks up toward Madison.

Dante: Maybe, maybe not. This is your little vendetta, not mine.

Madison: In case you haven’t noticed, he’s the only competition you’ve had in weeks. I thought that’d be enough to pique your interest.

Dante’s eyebrow arches as he gives Madison and questioning glare.

Dante: Gumbo has my attention, you don’t have to worry about that. The little Cajun prick almost got lucky last week and that’s thanks to you.

Madison: What’s the matter? The Icon have a little trouble with the French Onion Dip?

Dante chuckles in response to Madison’s question. He leans back in his seat, lacing his fingers behind his head.

Dante: Not quite. But maybe you’re right. Maybe I should get a little more involved with your grudge against the Ragin’ Cajun. I think I could make his life a living hell.

Madison: Now that’s what I like to hear.

The camera fades from GM’s office as TNT cuts to a commercial.

[align=center]*Commercial Break*[/align]

TNT returns live in one of the random corridors of the WVU Coliseum. The Cruiserweight Champion April Lynn is doing some last minute warm-ups for her match when she’s approached by TNT interviewer Katie Hudson.

Katie: April? Can I get a few words with you?

April ceases her warm-up, turning her attention to the only tolerable member of TNT’s interviewer staff. But that doesn’t mean April’s excited for this interview.

April: What’s up, Katie?

Katie: Well, you had some strong words for Kendra Norton earlier in the week. Not to mention some words towards Extreme Ninja #2. Have you had an opportunity to hear their responses?

April nods her head even before she speaks, her expression remaining bothered despite Katie’s polite demeanor.

April: Yeah, Katie, I saw it. I mean, they sure waited long enough to open their big mouths. Or… actually, Ninja didn’t open his mouth but that’s not the point. The point is, I meant everything I said about Kendra and the Extreme Ninja.

Katie: While I completely agree with your thoughts on Kendra lately, don’t you feel you were a little harsh on Extreme Ninja #2? I mean, he was tricked by Smarty Smark.

April: That’s true. But he’s the one who agreed to associate with Smarty in the first place. So if you ask me, and ya did, he had it coming. Smarty‘s been pretty upfront about who he is all along.

Katie shrugs her shoulders, finding a sense of truth to April’s words but at the same time knowing that April is mostly angry at Kendra and taking it out on anyone that associates with her.

Katie: I guess that’s true.

April: Excuse me, Katie. I don’t have time to sit and chat. I’ve gotta go kick some battle axe.

April snatches her Cruiserweight title off a nearby equipment box and heads off towards the gorilla position, leaving Katie to stare after her as we cut back to ringside.
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JH: Now it's time for what we thought was gonna be the first match of the night, it’s a tag team cruiserweight action filled match!

TM: And in the match is the Cruiserweight Champion and the #1 contender for that title as well as, in my opinion, the uncrowned TRUE #1 contender and a man who could possibly be a top contender for the belt too.

JH: Kendra will only be the #1 contender once she proves herself.

TM: She has, and April can’t run away from actual talented challengers in Kendra and Ninja forever.

MA: The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a 15 minute time limit, your referee for this contest is Richard Kelly.

The house lights fade, being replaced with strobes as the Pussycat Dolls come over the PA system. April steps out onto the stage with her Cruiserweight Championship around her waist, stopping to glance out at the crowd on either side before making her way towards the ring. She glances back at the crowd before climbing in under the middle rope. Dropping her duster off her shoulders, she tosses it aside before removing her Cruiserweight Championship and raising it in the air for all the fans to see. She turns holds it up for the opposite side of the arena and then passes the belt off to the ref. She backs into her corner, doing some last minute preparations for the forth-coming contest.

MA: Introducing one half of the first team…She hails from Aurora, Ohio. She weighs in tonight at one hundred and twenty five pounds and she stands in at five feet and four feet…And she is your reigning FIW Cruiserweight Champion of the World…SHE! IS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLLLLLLYNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN~!

The titantron then goes blank as the arena lights cut off. The arena waits in darkness and silence until a medium blood red glow envelops the ring and it’s surrounding area. A bright sky blue spotlight shoots around the crowd scanning around as the PA comes alive with the sounds of Ateryu’s Demonology and Heartache fast paced guitar intro blares throughout. The spotlight stops right before the lyrics hit and it remains still as Chris steps into the light.

[align=center]Well I believe you
I see it every time your pallbearer’s pallor is obscured by the darkness (the darkness)
[/align]

The spotlight goes away and the blood red color turns into an icy blue light. The main lights flicker between the blood red and icy blue colors.

[align=center]Dancing across your face (across your face)
And when the blackness veils your eyes in pain.
[/align]

The lights turn back to their normal settings as Chris makes his way down to the ring focused on the ring ahead.

[align=center]If I had my way I’d cut
The calluses off your, off your breaking heart
If I could get past the sternum.

Am I being too cryptic? Am I being too obscure?
Am I being too cryptic? Am I being too obscure?
And pin me down under glass until the end of days
If it can help you discover that we share the same pain.
I just hope you write your thesis before your subject is dead.
No life after death.
[/align]

Chris jumps straight up onto the apron. He turns to look at the crowd and point to them with enthusiastic energy before flipping over the top rope backwards. Chris seems to be a bundle of unbridled energy as he hops in the ring.

MA: And the other half of the first team…He hails from Denver, Colorado. He weighs in tonight at two hundred and twenty five pounds and stands at six feet and one inch…HE! IS! CHRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS LLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE~!

Suddenly the lights cut out and are replaced with bright white and red spot lights. The lights scan across the audience to jeers as “Drugs” starts to play on the P.A. System. Walking out from the back Smarty Smark is waving a Canadian flag on a pole and Paper Bag Man is wearing a tie with the red maple leaf on the front. Turning around to face the curtain Smarty Smark waves the Canadian flag even more so. Out from the back “the Centerpiece of Smarty Smark and Smark” Extreme Ninja #2 and “The Canadian Enforcer” Kendra Norton walk out.

Ninja’s normally matching his ring attire blue and black robe is now sporting colors of white and red like the Canadian flag, and his sign has drawn on it the red maple leaf. The proud Americans in the audience jeer and boo the presence of these Canadian themed things. As all four walk past the camera man on the walk way Smarty gets right into the camera and shouts “OH CANADA!” before walking past the camera man. Paper Bag Man and Smarty Smark sit on opposite sides of the middle rope and allow Ninja & Kendra to get into the ring. Kendra walks over to the far left turnbuckle while Extreme Ninja #2 walks over to the near right turnbuckle.

They both at the same time hop up onto the second rope of each buckle, Kendra arguing with fans as they boo her while the fans dressed like Ninja in the front row try to talk some sense into their hero who tries to ignore their pleads. As the lights come back on both hop off the turnbuckles and take off their jacket and robe, handing them over to PBM through the ropes. Kendra calls Ninja over to their corner and begins to talk to him as they await their match.


MA: And introducing the second team…They hail respectfully from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada and Detroit, Michigan. They weigh in at a combine weight of three hundred and twenty five pound, separately weighing in tonight respectfully at one hundred and forty five pounds and one hundred and eighty pounds…They are K-Funk and N-Funk…THEY! ARE! THE! FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNKYYYYYYYYYYYYYY BUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNCH~!

Chris Love and April talk among each other, deciding the Chris will start them out while on the other side of the ring Kendra steps out of the ring to let Ninja start them out, the two men walk towards the center of the ring. Richard Kelly looks between the two men and explains the rules; Chris says he understands while Ninja nods his head showing he understands as well, suddenly he extends his hand to Chris Love. Smarty Smark shouts and howls in protest on the outside as Chris Love and Extreme Ninja #2 shake hands with one another.


[align=center]DING DING DING![/align]


And with the sound of the bell the match is under way, Chris and Ninja circle the ring from one another, both at a jogging pace as PBM and Smarty cheer on EN #2 from the outside, while the fans themselves are rather divided between whose side they are on. Without warning Chris Love charges right towards the smaller man, nearly knocking his head off of his shoulders with a running forearm, but Extreme Ninja #2 manages to stay on his feet as he stumbles back, Love grabs a hold of him and whips him right into the rope. Leaping up into the air Chris Love performs a picture perfect dropkick, but no one is there as Ninja hangs onto the top rope and watches Chris crash to the canvas, EN #2 races past Love and looks ready to bounce off the other set of ropes, Chris tries again for a dropkick but for a second time gets nothing but air, staggering up to his feet Extreme Ninja #2 rushes forward and sounds like a gun went off when Ninja connects with a yakuza kick against the side of Chris Love’s head. Trying to fight through the pain, Chris Love starts to return to his vertical base, but Ninja isn’t having any of that as he side shuffle kicks Chris in the mid-section, causing the larger man to finally double over. Quickly Extreme Ninja #2 grabs Mister Love by the back of his head, right before he starts unloading rapid, almost tommy gun like in speed, shin kicks with his right leg to Chris Love’s skull as his hand on the back of Chris Love’s head keeps him in place to suffer from the kicks, otherwise known as Kawada kicks.

TM: Looks like Chris Love is nothing but all talk, he said he was going to steam roll right through Ninja, well who’s schooling who little man?!

JH: It’s just the start of the match, besides Chris Love is the biggest wrestler in this match, so I don’t blame him for being a bit confident that he could handle the Funky Bunch.

TM: I do blame him for being so arrogant as to think he could rival the sheer ability Kendra Norton and Extreme Ninja #2 have, Extreme Ninja #2 took Swytch to his limits! Kendra Norton broke the heart of a former Dual Crown Champion in Jim O’Brien and made a former World Heavyweight Champion tap out in Orion Oldriod! What’s Chris done, besides being a loser with a weird last name?

JH: Well he is still in the first few months of his career, and he has the Cruiserweight Champion of the World in his corner.

TM: Though she’s a hottie, that belt around April’s waist should be Extreme Ninja #2’s or Kendra Norton’s, just a matter of time before they take it from her too.

Suddenly Kendra starts to enter the ring, April tries to enter as well to cut her off but Richard gets in April’s face telling her to stay out of the ring, their arguing allows Kendra Norton to perfectly enter the ring. Kendra barks some orders at Ninja, though her team mate shakes his head and points to the corner, slapping his hands together as if he were tagging himself, trying to state that she isn’t legal and should get back to the corner, but after a few seconds of Norton’s ole evil eye on him Extreme Ninja #2 obeys her commands. The duo each grab an arm of the dazed Chris Love and exactly at the same time the duo lifts him up into the air, walking forward a bit so he is in mid-air between the two of them, hanging up there as if he were on some cross. At the exact same moment the Funky Bunch drop down to their knees, double crucifix power bombing Chris Love, Kendra gets up and calls for Ninja to pick up Chris but EN #2 shakes his head no again, attempting to get this match back to being a fair fight, but Norton isn’t hearing any of it as she picks up Chris instead. Both Kendra and Ninja grab a front katahajime on Chris Love, right before they both throw him back, dumping Chris right on top of his skull and awkwardly bending his neck with a double katahajime front suplex, also known as a double front tazmission suplex, Kendra rolls out of the ring just in time for Kelly to bring his attention away from April and to the match as Ninja rolls up Chris for the cover and hooks the legs.

JH: Darn it! The referee didn’t see a thing of what went on! Kendra illegally aided her team mate!

TM: If the referee doesn’t see it, it didn’t happen, though I don’t get what was with Ninja being a pussy about the double teaming.


[align=center]1![/align]


JH: I think it’s a lil’ thing called honor Thomas, maybe you should look it up.

TM: I certainly don’t like the sound of it already, so no, I won’t look it up.


[align=center]2![/align]


JH: If this is how the match ends then this is truly disappointing!

TM: Bye bye Chris, nice to have you come, and even better that you brought some eye candy for me to look at while you were busy getting beaten up, mmmmhmmmm April…


[align=center]Thre-No! Kick out![/align]


JH: Yes! Love managed to kick out! Though how much does he have left?!

TM: I demand good sir a recount!


Extreme Ninja #2 sits up and sighs a muted sigh of relief, though noticing Kendra’s and Smarty’s expressions over the near fall starts acting like he’s upset about it too, pounding his fists lightly against the canvas and looking up at Richard Kelly. Snatching a handful of Chris Love’s tights Extreme Ninja #2, besides partly having Chris moon the crowd and April, picks up his opponent before he pushes him back, sending Chris Love staggering a few paces back, Ninja wastes no time delivering palm thrust after palm thrust to Chris’ chest, throat and face in rapid fire style. Love is once again dazed but still on his feet, stumbling about like an old drunk perverted after being smacked for groping a woman, but he doesn’t stay like that for long as Ninja leaps up into the air and connects with a jumping back brain kick to Chris, sending him down to the canvas like a ton of bricks. Ninja kips up to his feet and looks around the ring, his head darting about as Smarty praises him and Kendra cheers on her partner, EN #2 races into the ropes while Chris Love starts to stagger up to his feet, April tries to warn her partner but it is no use, within inches of him Extreme Ninja #2 leaps up into the air getting ready to climb up Love’s shoulder, but at the last second Chris Love spins around, grabbing hold of Ninja in mid-air and spinning around with him before he slams him against the canvas with a powerslam! Paper Bag Man throws his arms up and starts cheering Ninja to get up while Smarty Smark looks like he might be having a heart attack he’s throwing such a fit, slowly to the crowd’s cheers Chris crawls towards his corner while Ninja after a few moments starts to crawl towards his, both men to a thunderous reaction leap and tag in their respected partners, April and Kendra rushing towards the center of the ring to finally meet one on one!

TM: Yes! It’s finally time for some girl on girl action!

JH: April Lynn is going to be able to repay Kendra Norton back for what she did to her a week ago on this very program!

TM: No, Kendra is going to show why that belt belongs to the Funky Bunch and no one else!

JH: We’ll just see about that.

The fans in the arena are going nuts as April and Kendra circle the ring from one another, both staring a hole right into the other, April’s one of determination and anger, Kendra’s one of amusement and arrogance. “Come on Barbie” Kendra mouths as April isn’t needed to be asked twice, charging Miss Norton only to be taken down with a side headlock takedown, but she isn’t in it for long as April wiggles out of it and locks in a head scissors on Kendra, the Canadian Enforcer realizes what trouble she is in and as quickly as she can scrambles out of it and back towards her corner. A small smile crosses April’s lips as she looks over at the stunned, and perhaps slightly embarrassed, Kendra who’s just been bested in an exchange by a “Barbie” as she put it, Lynn gets up to her feet and the two start to circle one another one more, now with Kendra being a bit more focused than before. Not wanting to waste any more time April advances and when she is nearly in arm’s reach Kendra suddenly turns right around, and tags Ninja back in! Quite the bit of the fans jeer as Kendra innocently shrugs her shoulders and smiles sweetly at April, mouthing the words “Better luck next time Barbie” before she exits the ring and let’s the still some what dazed Extreme Ninja #2 take back over for her, April looking quite unhappy with the fact Kendra did what many would consider as “chickening out”, though Smarty Smark applauds Kendra and on the outside raves about how brilliant of a mind game that was.

JH: All of us, not just the fans, finally get to see what we’ve been waiting for in this match and Kendra spoils it.

TM: She didn’t want to have to embarrass April, simply as that Jonathon.

JH: Looked more like she started to look a bit brighter, almost yellow, if you ask me.

TM: Her? Scared of April? Come on, I mean April is sexy and all, but she isn’t any thing to fear.

Pointing right past him to his team’s corner April yells at Ninja to tag Kendra back in while on the outside Smarty waves his hands in a panic and shakes his head no quickly, Ninja snatches up his sign and scribbles some thing on it, turning it around so April can see it, it reads “Sorry”. He tosses the sign aside for the time being, Extreme Ninja #2 charges towards April, only to have the young lady leap frog right over him, sending him running towards the ropes. Bouncing off of them he comes barreling back towards her, only for April to leap into the air and wrap her legs around Ninja’s neck, taking him down with a hurricanrana before getting back up to her feet. As he staggers up to his feet April snatches up Ninja’s head in a front face lock, she runs towards the ropes with him in toe, she scales across the ropes, jumping off of the top one and twirling herself and Ninja’s body, right before she spikes him viciously head first into the canvas with a modified tornado DDT! She walks over near the Funky Bunch’s corner, Kendra casually drops down from it but April isn’t interested in her fellow female wrestler at the moment, rather EN #2’s sign, she picks it and the marker up, scribbling on it as she walks back over towards her fallen foe whose starting to get to his feet.

TM: Hey! That’s Ninja’s sign! No one can touch Ninja’s sign damn it!

JH: Fill out a complaint form or some thing.

TM: Okay, who do I send it to?

JH: Sarcasm Thomas, sarcasm, I’m sure no one really cares that April took Ninja’s sign for the time being.

Lifting the sign up into the air with a grin April’s handy work reads “Kendra is a chicken!” To which the fans start chanting that very name April gave her, Smarty Smark tries to cover Kendra’s ears as she glares from the outside at April and at the fans calling her a coward. Ninja gets up to his feet, but is double over as he tries to recover, sadly for the ninjistu refereeing master there is no rest break for him as April leaps into the air, looking like a cheerleader as she kicks her leg up so high she nearly kicks herself, her leg slams against the back of EN #2’s neck. While Extreme Ninja #2 drops to the canvas April lands from her kick doing a perfect version of the splits, finishing her modified version of Split Decision, further enraging Kendra Norton who storms around ringside before hopping back up onto the apron, Smarty Smark shouting at Ninja to think about the money, as if that were going to motivate EN #2 to get to his feet. Stumbling up to his feet Ninja is met by April grabbing him by the wrist, and whipping him right into her team’s corner, chasing after him, only mere seconds after his chest slams into the turnbuckle April connects with a spinning leg lariat in the corner to the back of EN #2’s head, getting back to her feet she forces Ninja up to his as she tags in Chris.

JH: Seems that Kendra can certainly call others names, but when some one else does it she can’t handle it.

TM: Lies, what April wrote was slander, what Kendra said is the truth.

JH: I thought you liked April?

TM: Hey, just because I like to watch her doesn’t mean I think she’s talented as a wrestler, just talented in…other areas.

Chris snatches Ninja from April as Miss Lynn exits the ring, at the blink of the eye Chris Love arm drags Extreme Ninja #2 out of the corner, sending EN #2 tumbling across the ring only for him in mid-tumble roll right up onto his feet. But Extreme Ninja #2 isn’t allowed much time to celebrate as he is met face to forearm with a flying forearm from Chris Love, Love kips up to his feet at the same exact time Extreme Ninja #2, the two of them thinking the same exact thing as they take each other down with a lariat in stereo. Once again both of them near mirror each other as they roll to opposite sides of the ring and get up to their feet, Chris hurries over to Ninja and connects with a roaring elbow, though before EN #2 can fall Chris Love scoops up his head into a reverse face lock, charging right into the turnbuckle with Extreme Ninja #2’s limp body following along. The rookie like some type of amazingly genetic man spider scales up the turnbuckle, kicking off of it and with doing so kicking Kendra right in the face, nearly making her fall off of the apron, Chris Love’s body flips right over Ninja’s as he drills EN #2’s head down skull first with a sliced bread #2! Love dives onto Ninja, hooking both legs as Richard Kelly drops down into a counting position.

TM: Crap! Kick out Ninja! Kick out! My booze money depends on you kicking out!

JH: Sliced bread #2! This could possibly be it!


[align=center]1![/align]


TM: Shush Hitchen! Shush!

JH: Just saying it could be Thomas, calm down, I think I see a vein sticking out of your forehead that nearly rivals the one Smarty is sporting right now.


[align=center]2![/align]


TM: This can’t be happening! This young punk can’t defeat the Funky Bunch!

JH: Well by the looks of it, I’d say he is.


[align=center]Th-No! Kick out![/align]


TM: Praise the lord! Thought I was going to have to pay for my own booze tonight.

JH: He was less than a second’s worth of time away from winning it!


Frustration is apparent on Chris Love’s face as he sits up and slaps his hand again the palm of the other, asking Richard Kelly just to make sure he didn’t make a mistake, Richard of course says he didn’t and it was only two. Ninja rolls out onto the apron, clutching at his masked skull with one hand while his other uses the ropes to help pull him up to his feet; Chris walks over to the apron to bring EN #2 back into the ring. Sadly for the young rookie he is met with a round house kick over the top rope to his skull by Ninja, looking like it nearly K.O.ed him as he drops to the canvas, Extreme Ninja #2 holds the top rope and sling shots himself up onto it, he stands there for a few moments and waves to Kendra, who quickly scribbles some thing on his sign and then tosses it to him, Ninja catches it and lifts it up into the air before he performs a flawless shooting star press, the sign reading “DANGEROUS~~!!!” Springing right up to his feet Ninja adds some thing to the sign before holding it up again; under the previous word it says “Don’t try that at home kids” before he hands Smarty his sign through the ropes and starts the task of picking up Chris, who with forty more pounds to his frame than Ninja is a bit of a challenge. Quickly Extreme Ninja #2 wraps his arm around Chris Love’s head, preparing him for a DDT, but Chris who seems to realize the danger he is in pushes EN #2 back, sending them nearly half way across the ring until one of the sets of ropes stops them, Love whips Ninja off of the ropes and him however at the last second before he does, going unnoticed by Chris but not the referee, Kendra slaps Extreme Ninja #2’s back, tagging herself in.

JH: Guess the referee is counting that blind tag, but I’m not sure if Ninja or Chris are even aware of it.

TM: She certainly was gentle in her tagging.

JH: Probably the only thing that woman is gentle with.

TM: Hey, don’t talk that way about Kendra, she is the Canadian Enforcer and one of the greatest technical wrestlers alive today, I dare say she has talent on loan from Zeus himself.

When Extreme Ninja #2 comes charging back towards Chris Love, he ducks, sending Ninja flying about seven feet into the air with a mighty backdrop, though Ninja isn’t the only one who learns how to fly, as Chris turns around and finds himself on the receiving end of a belly to belly suplex by Kendra Norton! Chris scrambles up to his feet but Kendra is already up to hers and meets him again with a suplex, this time of the butterfly variety, for a second time he gets up and for the third time he tastes a suplex at the Canadian Enforcer’s hands, this time a Kendraplex. Extreme Ninja #2 shakes the cobwebs out of his head and looks around, charging towards Chris thinking he is still the legal person on his team, but as quick as a lightning bolt April races in and meets Ninja off with a running superkick, staggering the former horrorcore referee. One last time Chris gets to his feet and Kendra tries to lock in her wrist clutch exploder, but instead Chris Love manages to avoid it and grab Kendra, connecting with his Dragon DDT before rolling her up into the cover. Mean while Ninja leaps up and tries to hurricanrana April only for FIW’s Cruiserweight Champ to try and reverse it into a powerbomb, seeing things aren’t going his way in that direction, EN #2 tries another, rolling right off of April and in mid-roll grabbing her from behind to roll her right up into a sunset flip pin fall too!

TM: Yes! Ninja’s got it! Ninja’s going to win it!

JH: Dragon DDT! Dragon DDT! Chris Love goes for the cover!


[align=center]1![/align]


TM: Wait! Ninja doesn’t realize Kendra tagged in! Stop Chris’ pin Ninja! Stop it!

JH: Even if she hadn’t tagged in, April isn’t the legal person for her team either!


[align=center]2![/align]


TM: Smarty! Paper! Do some thing!

JH: They’re too late! No point in trying to get in the ring now! Chris has this in the bag!


[align=center]3!


DING DING DING!
[/align]


TM: No!

JH: Ah ha!


Ninja rolls April away from him as he gets to his feet, thinking he won the match, raising his arms in victory as Smarty and Paper Bag Man have a fit on the apron. Slowly Ninja lowers his arms as Richard Kelly raises Chris Love’s as he gets to his feet, “Demonology and Heartache” playing over the P.A. System. Smarty Smark shuffles into the ring and crawls over to Kendra Norton, checking on her as Extreme Ninja #2 questions the referee with make-shift sign language over what happened, it is then that Ninja discovers about the tag. Chris walks over and helps April Lynn to her feet, the two of them celebrating their victory some what as they exit the ring, not wanting to stick around in case the Funky Bunch wants revenge.

MA: Your winners by pin fall…CHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSS LLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOVE AND AAAAAAAAAAAAPRRRRRRRRRILLLLLLLLL LYYYYYYYYYYNNNNNNNNNNNN~!!!

TM: *Sighs* Two weeks dry, thanks a lot Chris “I’m a dorky rookie” Love and April “I fear talent” Lynn.

JH: Oh be quiet, they earned this victory fair and square! Though I don’t think that greedy egotistical piggy known as Smarty Smark will take his team’s loss laying down.

[align=center]*Commercial Break*[/align]

The openning strains of Coheed and Cambria's "welcome home" starts over the PA, the lights already darkened, as the acoustic guitar gives way to an electric pyros explode, the camera view switches to behind the entrance way where we see Shannon Micheals standing in the entrance way wearing his long sleevless hooded trenchcoat. As the heavy riff starts Shannon walks out of the entranceway, he walks down the entrance almost ingoring the fans slowly. His face covered by his long hair. As he gets down to the ring he looks into it then looks around the arena lifting his hood slightly. Shannon then gets onto the ring apron as the lyrics begin

"You could've been all I wanted
But you weren't honest
Now get in the ground
You choked off the surest of favors
But if you really loved me
You would've endured my world"


Shannon leaps over the top rope and pulls back his hood outstrecthing his arms. He then slaps his chest and points to the crowd.

"Well you're just as I presumed
A whore in sheep's clothing
Fucking up all I do
And if so here we stop
Then never again
Will you see this in your life"


Shannon removes his coat and throws it over the top rope bouncing on the balls of his feet.

JH: Well ladies and gentlemen, we're about to get started on our second tag team match of the evening. And it'll definately be quite the opprotunity for thisn young man from Dallas to make an impact.

TM: He won't, though.

JH: Well, you don't know that. He has a victory over a former Dual Crown Champion in Jim O'Brien.

TM: One - that was by DQ. Two - Jim freakin' lost to everybody.

The lights fade slowly to nothing but a dim darkness spread around the arena, gold strobe lights begin flashing all around the arena, we hear Marilyn Manson’s voice creep over the speakers…

[align=center]Your Own Personal Jesus[/align]

…Alex Evans emerges onto the entrance ramp, a red carpet rolls down to the ring as he stands there looking down toward the floor, the fans absolutely booing the hell out of him. A choir of three girls each side come out, they begin singing along with Marilyn Manson. Alex lifts his head to a huge gold explosion of pyros, Alex then grins toward the crowd as he begins walking down to the ring…

[align=center]Lift Up The Receiver
I'll Make You A Believer!
[/align]

…Alex get to the ring, he climbs onto the apron, looking out to the fans he grins and shoots his arms out vertically to a huge explosion, of gold pyro from each corner post. He then climbs in the ring and walks toward the corner, climbing it and posing for the fans,. Boo’s still aimed at him, he jumps down and prepares for the match to begin.

JH: And this man here... Good Lord, I just can't fathom his arrogance. In all my years, I don't think I ever saw a competitor so full of theirself.

TM: Please, Jonathan. This wrestler here is TNT's future. Heck, he's the prototype of what professional wrestling will become in the future! In fact, he's so futuristic, I bet he drives a Delorian that can travel through time and is really a Cyberdine Systems Model 101, Series 800 Terminator sent from the year 2028!

JH: Yeah... And I'm Alf's Uncle.

TM: Explains the resemblence.

"Defy You" by Offspring begins to play and Kailey strides toward the ring, waving to the fans and acknowledging those with signs and banners with a thumbs up. When she reaches the ring, she slides in between the middle and top ropes then waves to the crowd before moving to her corner to psyche up.

JH: Now right here, is resilience personified. At Anarchy In The UK she gave Swytch one of his best fights. Even though she came out on the losing end, I feel she didn't lose any momentum at all.

TM: She personifies something else, Jonathan.

JH: What's that?

TM: Hawwwwwwwwtness.

JH: Oi vey...

With the arena plummeted into darkness a few lines of static flash up onto the TNTtron and Local H’s “That’s What They All Say” starts to play out over the PA system. In the gloom a few shapes can be made out walking onto the stage and starting to move down the ramp. A series of red lights beam down faintly onto the stage, before others join it and illuminate the sides of the elevated ramp where young, beautiful women are aligning themselves on either side and kneeling. They position themselves like the religious worshipper before their God.

The words, ‘Yeah, Uh-Huh, That’s What They All Say”, are the prompt for a flash of light and a series of explosions around the stage and TNTtron and two more figures can be seen advancing through the haze, a bright spotlight on them. As the smoke clears Ragin’ can be seen head bowed with Natalya moving around him, her arms stroking his torso. They walk directly down through the press of females on the elevated ramp, the spotlight following the two Russians with every step.

As they reach the bottom of the walkway and the ring ropes, Ragin’ sits on the lowest one and allows Natalya to slip between them before he steps along the apron toward the turnbuckle. The women aligned on the ramp depart unnoticed and the lights suddenly turn back on. Ragin’ hauls himself up and looks out over at the fans, raising a mocking fist in the air to a chorus of jeers. He points his fingers down at himself briefly before hopping down into the ring and unbuttoning whichever expensive shirt he has worn today and handing it to Natalya. She whispers something in his ear and slides out of the ring.


TM: Ugh, I can't stand this guy. He's just too arrogant.

JH: But Alex Evans isn't?

TM: Alex Evans isn't arrogant. He shows feelings of unwarranted importance out of overbearing pride.

JH: That's the definition for arrogance, Thomas.

TM: No it's not, it's the definition for Alex Evans!

JH: Ugh, I should've jumped to NWW when I had the chance.

Michael Anderson, who's been mid-ring the whole time, brings his mic to his lips and does what he gets paid for.

MA: Ladies and Gentlemen, this Tag Team match is scheduled for one fall and has a 30 minute time limit!

Ah yes, the 30 Minute Match fan is back, cheering and screaming like no other. But wait, what's this? There's a Woman only three or so seats away cheering for the 30 Minute Time Limit as well! 30 Minute Match Fan Man looks over and sees her, his jaw dropping to the floor and his eyes growing wide. 30 Minute Match Fan Woman stops her cheering and sees 30 Minute Match Fan Man. 30MMFWoman's jaw drops as well as she charges 30MMFMan and the two embrace, kissing eachother passionately. After a few seconds of eternity, the two release their liplock from one another, take eachother by the hand and skip off into the sunset... Or Concession Stand. Maybe they'll buy some Graver watches or something.

MA: Introducing first, the team in the corner to my left. At a combined weight of Four Hundred And Thirty Six pounds. . . ALEX EVANS and SHANNNAHHHHHN MICHAELLLLLLLLLLS!

We cheer, we boo. We don't know what to think. The crowd likes Shannon... but hate Alex. What is a crowd to do?

MA: And the opponents, standing to my right. At a combined weight of Four Hundred And Fourteen pounds. . . KAILEY LANE and RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAGINNNNNNNNNNNN'!

Once again a mixed reaction, except this time 10x louder. The crowd cheers wild for their beloved Kailey while the crowd also boos maniacally for Ragin'.

JH: Obviously a mixed reaction for either team, it very well could play a role into this match.

TM: Now how in the hell would it?It's just a bunch of fat, smelly rednecks with opinions that don't matter at all.

JH: Atmosphere, Thomas. If you're in a tag team match with a partner the crowd absolutely despises, their booing could get into your head. Make you think that the crowd doesn't like yopu either. And if you're a wrestler who thrives off of these fans like Kailey Lane or Shannon Micheals, it could really throw them off of their game.

TM: Yeah, that's not the biggest load of crap I ever heard.[/sarcasm]

Michael Anderson climbs from the ring while Tony Clarke makes his way in, and signals to Timmy the Timekeeper for the ol'...

[align]=center]DING DING DING![/align]

Between Alex Evans and Shannon Micheals, Alex looks over to his partner, shrugs and can be heard saying "Mate, I'm better than you. I'm startin' this sucker out." Miffed, Alex climbs between the ropes to his corner. We then cue to Kailey and Ragin', where we see Ragin' climbing through the ropes yo the apron, but says something to Kailey which causes her to shoot him quite a glare.

JH: Well, great to see out tag teams getting along so well.[/sarcasm]

Alex and Kailey begin to circle one another, then engage in a Collar and Elbow Tie-Up. But Alex is quick to a Rear Waistlock and right off of the bat immediately rolls up Kailey with a School Boy pin!

[align=center]ONE!



TWO!



THR-- KICKOUT!
[/align]

Both competitors quickly roll back up to their feet. Kailey grabs ahold of Alex's wrist and whips him, only for Alex to reverse the Irish Whip and throw Kailey to the ropes. Alex goes for a pickup, only for Kailey to slide out of it behind Alex. Kailey whips Alex to the ropes once again. Kailey bends over looking for a Back Body Drop, only for Alex to leapfrog over her. Kailey turns around right into a boot to her midsection, then gets thrown to the ropes again by Alex. Kailey rebounds off of the ropes to Alex, who looks for a Back Body Drop of his own, only for Kailey to flip over him with a Sunset Flip! But Alex fights to keep his balance, then falls to his knees, pinning Kailey to the mat!

[/align=center]ONE!

TW--
[/align]

Kailey rolls Alex onto his shoulders!

[align=center]ONE!

T-- KICKOUT!
[/align]

Alex rolls backward and places himself on top of Kailey in a Jacknife Pin!

[align=center]ONE!

TWO!

TH-- KICKOUT!
[/align]

Kailey reverses it and pins Alex's shoulders back to the mat!

[align=center]ONE!

TW-- KICKOUT!
[/align]

Both grapplers roll backwards and palm theirselves to their feet to a standoff, bringing a decent sized pop from the crowd for each wrestler's abilities. Alex gets a few impolite words in at Kailey, then looks out into the crowd and gives them some as well, Kailey then signaling Alex to bring it.

JH: Great skill of display brought by each wrestler.

TM: More Alex than anything. You see all his reversals? He had, like, a million. I kept count too. If we went by a point system, Alex would so be winning.

JH: Whatever you say, Champ.

Alex and Kailey begin to circle once again and once again Tie-Up. Ales goes for another Rear Waistlock, which Kailey reverses into a Rear Waistlock of her own. Alex breaks Kailey's grasp around him and grans ahold of her forearm, twisting it into a Standing Armbar. But Kailey reaches around and snaps Alex to the mat with a Double Leg Takedown. Kailey raises one of Alex's feet from the ground and starts to twist the ankle of Akex Evans, only for Alex to roll through backwards. Kailey still has a hold on Alex's foot, which she then rolls into a Single Leg Boston Crab. But before Kailey can gain much leverage, Alex rolls to his back, shoves Kailey by the Gluteous Maximus and rolls her into a pin cover!

[align=center]ONE!

T-- KICKOUT!
[/align]

But Kaliey rolls back to her feet, her hold still on Alex's ankle and leg. Clarke asks Evans if he wants to tap out, but Alex lets him know he's not into that sort of thing. Kailey ducks a little to get a tighter grip on Alex's leg, only for Evans to disrespectfully slap Kailey across the face! Not pleased in the least, Kailey nails a thumb to Alex's eye, releases her hold and stomps Alex in the face!

JH: Well, this kittne has claws.

TM: And an amazing beeeee--

Jonathan shoots a glare towards Thomas.

TM: --HIND YOU! *rolls up a newspaper and whacks the back of Jonathan's head*

JH: What in the world was that for?!

TM: There was an Alaskan sized Mosquito behind you! They mentioned it in the Weekly World News.

JH: You believe that stuff? C'mon, in the October 1998 issue it said the world would end at the end of the week.

Alex and Kailey begin to circle once again into another Tie-Up, but Alex is quick to a Side Headlock. Kailey backs herself and Alex up to the ropes, then shoves Alex off into the parallel ropes. Alex charges back and connects with a Shoulder Block, sending Kailey to the mat. Alex runs to the ropes at his right as Kailey kips up to her feet. Alex runs towards Kailey, only for Kailey to leapfrog over him. Alex then leaps to the 2nd rope, leaps backwards, grabs ahold of Kailey's head, twists and rolls into a Headlock Takedown! But Kailey wraps her legs around Alex neck and chest and before can get a good grip, Alex rolls out of the precidtament to his feet while Kailey does the same. Alex looks to go for a Haymeker only for Kailey to stop him with a boot to his meidsection, then a Forearm Strike to his jaw! Kailey reels back and nails another HUUUUUGE Forearm to Alex's jaw! Kailey shoves Alex to the ropes and slingshots him back to the corresponding ropes in front of them. Kailey falls to her luscious behind with a splits, but Alex rebounds off of the ropes, leaps over Kailey and rolls to his feet while Kailey rolls to hers. Kailey approaches Alex only to recieve a clubbing blow to the mush! Alex grabs a handful of forearm shoots Kailey to the ropes and connects with a Japanese Arm Drag! Quickly, Alex raises his fists to the air in celebration while Kailey looks on in disgust, the crowd cheering their displeasure as well.

JH: Alex Evans is such a tremendous athlete. But the attitude he carries, there's just no way I can back him.

TM: This isn't about that whole "arrogance" thing again, is it? Jeez, quit kicking a dead horse.

As Alex looks out into the crowd and assures them he's the greatest wrestler to ever compete, Kailey climbs back to a vertical base and swings a Kick right into Alex's leg! He turns around, clutching at his leg as Kailey nails another stiff Kick to Alex's quad, then a Kick to the side of Alex. Kailey then runs backwards, rebounds off of the ropes AND NAILS A KOPPOU KICK OFF OF ALEX'S HEAD!

JH: INCREDIBLE Koppou Kick by Kailey Lane!

Alex rolls to his corner, climbing to his feet while clutching at his head. Shannon Micheals looks on with a smirk, which doesn't please the "Wrestling Fucking God." Alex reels back and nails a HUUUUUGE Chop against Shannon's chest, which angers the Flaming Dragon, who's now clutching at his chest. "Who's laughing now, dumbshit?! Now you're the legal man!" Alex can be heard yelling towards Shannon. Shannon grits his teeth and growls surely something that the censors wouldn't like too much as he climbs over the 2nd rope into the ring while Alex hits the mat and rolls out of the ring, a massive smile on his face.

JH: Come on, this is no time to take cheap shots at your tag team partner.

TM: Did you see Shannon smiling as he watched Alex get the tar knocked from him by Kailey? That's masochitic. Shannon's a sicko.

Shannon and Kailey approach one another, possibly looking to Tie Up. But Kailey leaves herself open to a kick to her midsection by Shannon, then a Forearm to her face! Shannon backs Kailey up to the ropes, then slingshot her towards the ropes. Kailey charges back and slides under Shannon's legs, climbs back to a vertical base only to take a stiff Chop to the chest! Kailey clutches at her chest, then gets thrown to the ropes again. Kailey blitzes, gets thrown airborn by Shannon only for Kailey to connect with a Huracanrana!

JH: HURA-KAILEY!

Everybody stares at Jonathan.

JH: What?

Kailey then makes her way over to her corner and holds her hand out for Ragin' to tag in. "You're doin' fine, keep going!" He yells. But Kailey just slaps his bicep, making the big, bad Russian the legal man. Ragin' just shakes his head as he climbs in and approaches Shannon Micheals, who's nearly at a vertical base. Ragin' approaches and raises him the rest of the way and nails a HUUUUUGE Right Closed Fist into Shannon's jaw! And another! Three for three times the price! With Shannon on Spahgetti legs, Ragin' locks Shannon in a Front Waistlock, then tucks his head underneath Shannon's arm. He lifts Shannon off of the ground, backs up and serves a three course meal of turnbuckle for Shannon to feast on!

TM: Eat 'Buckle. Pfft. That's too arrogant of a move.

JH: Ten bucks says the College kids have made a drinking game out of how many times either of us say "arrogant."

Shannon clutches at his face as he slowly climbs to his feet. Ragin', being such a gentlemen, "helps" Shannon back to his feet and then Russian Whips Shannon to the ropes. Shannon charges back, ducks under Ragin's meathook and leaps into a Crucifix! But Shannon brings his legs around AND TAKES RAGIN' TO THE MAT WITH A HEADSCISSORS TAKEDOWN!

JH: Amazing! Shannon warned Ragin' not to take him lightly, and it looks as if Shannon's backing up what he said!

Ragin' climbs to his hands and knees, but Shannon is quick to a Front Facelock on the Three Time World Heavyweight Champion. Ragin' continue to pushes to his feet, so Shannon places his head under Ragin's other arm, grabs a handful of Ragin's pants and lifts him with a Vertical Suplex! NO! Ragin' nails a knee to Shannon's midsection and goes for a Vertical Suplex of his own, only for Shannon to slip out of it behind Ragin'! Ragin' turns around into a Clubbing Blow to his ja-- TWO Clubbing Blows to his jaw, leaving the Master of Rage reeling. Shannon backs up to the ropes, bounces back into a Wheelbarrow on Ragin', but Ragin' lifts Shannon back to his feet! Ragin' tucks his head under Shannon's arm, looking for a Back Suplex only for Shannon to flip over and land on his feet! Ragin' turns around into a boot to his midsection WHICH HE CATCHES! But Shannon jumps AND CONNECTS WITH A SPINNING HEEL KICK! But Ragin' doesn't stay down for long as he slowly palms himself to a vertical base, his hand clutching at his face. Shannon rolls through as well, then runs towards the ropes behind him. He bounces off AND GETS DECAPITATED WITH A CLOTHESLINE!

[bJH:[/b] Shannon gave Ragin' too much time to recover--

TM:{/b] Too much time? That was, like, a quarter of a second.

JH: Well... He is Ragin'. Don't care for him but he is a former World Heavyweight Champion. Try giving credit where it's due sometime, Thomas.

TM: Hey, I do that all the time! In fact, I'll do that now. Hmmm... Ragin' couldn'tve picked a hotter Personal Assistant than Natalya Vladek.

JH: Thomas Moore, ladies and gentlemen.

Ragin' grabs a handful of hair, dragging Shannon to his feet. Ragin' walks backwards to a nearby corner, climbing up to the second rope. He places his knee behind Shannon's head, then shoves himself off of the turnbuckle RAMMING SHANNON FACE FIRST INTO THE MAT!

JH: What a sickening Face Wrecker! Shannon could have a broken nose or dislodged eye after that!

TM: Then he could wear an eyepatch and be Captain Shannon Micheals! Then he could grow a bitchen' black beard. But... he won't. He'll just keep up this "I got heart" crap.

Ragin' rolls Shannon into the cover. . .

[align=center]ONE!



TWO!



THR-- KICKOUT!
[/align]

Ragin' rolls off of his vertical press on Shannon and climbs to his feet. He bends over to "help" Shannon to his feet, but Shannon grabs Ragin' by the front of his pants and yanks Ragin' off balance, causing the former Slam Tag Team Champion to fall between the middle and top ropes to the outside. The crowd begins to murmer as Shannon climbs to his feet and Alex Evans climbs into the ring. Kailey Lane hops from her corner over to Ragin', eyeing both Shannon and Alex. Ragin' looks up at Kailey and makes an executive order, one which Kailey disagrees with. The Anarchy In The UK Double Jeopardy participants begin to carry a rather heated discussion, okay, arguement. All the while in the ring, Shannon and Alex look eachother in the eye, then to Ragin' and Kailey not enjoying eachother's company. They look to eachother again, then run to the ropes behind them. The rebound, charge AND CONNECT WITH A PAIR OF SUICIDE DIVES ON KAILEY LANE and RAGIN'!

JH: Oh my! A pair of Topei's on the 2005 Grand Prix winner and three time World Champion! We could see a major upset tonight!

With the human car crash before us now, Shannon Micheals is the first to his feet as slowly climbs to his feet. He grabs ahold of Ragin' and rolls him into the ring while Alex has also climbed up, rolling Kailey into the ring as well. Alex scales the ring steps and then starts to climb to the top rope, looking to connect with a super-cool-ultra-mega splash off the top rope onto Kailey. But in his way are Shannon Micheals and Ragin'. Shannon has Ragin' in a Rear Waistlock, attempting a German Suplex. Shannon lifts once - No dice. Shannon clubs Ragin' in the back of his head, then goes for another German Suplex - again, no luck. Ragin's too large for Shannon to suplex. Alex watches on from the top rope, a look of disappointment comes over his face, then shrugs. As Shannon lifts for a third time, Alex leaps from the ropes AND CONNECTS WITH A SUNSET FLIP ON SHANNON, IN TURN GIVING SHANNON MOMENTUM TO DROP RAGIN' ON THE TOP OF HIS HEAD WITH A GERMAN SUPLEX!

JH: GERRRRRMAHHHHHHHHHHN!

TM: No, Ragin's from Russia. I thought you knew that.

JH: I do kno-- Oh, forget it. Incredible Sunset Flip and German Suplex, the tide is really in the favor of Shannon and Alex.

WIth Alex and Shannon climbing to their feet, Kailey Lane makes her way into the scene, grabbing a handful of Shannon's forearm, Irish Whipping The Flaming Dragon to a nearby corner. But Alex jumps Kailey from behind, nailing her with an Axe Handle Smash. He connects with a huge Chop to Kailey's chest, getting a "WOOOOOOOOOO!" out of the crowd. Another chop, another "WOOOOOOOOOO!" Amidst the madness, Ragin' slowly climbs to his feet, clutching at his neck. He rubs his neck and yells... Well, the four letter word for fecal matter.

TM: I wonder what the Russian translation for "sh*beep*" is.

JH: I would imagine it's universal.

Alex steps in front of Kailey and puts her in an Ace Crusher position, and as Ragin' approaches Alex charges the corner, steps off of Shannon AND CONNECTS WITH A SLICED BREAD #2 ON KAILEY WHILE LANDING ON RAGIN'!

TM: FLIPPING AWESOME! I love it!

Alex climbs off of Ragin' to make the cover on Kailey...



But Tony Clarke's not counting! "You two aren't legal!" he yells to Alex and Kailey!


TM: Somebody better call INS! We got two illegals in the ring!

JH: Would you stop?

Quite miffed, Alex grabs a handful of Kailey's hair and brings her to her feet. He puts her in a Front Chancerie, then tucks his head under her arm. He grabs a handful of tights and lifts Kailey to the air. But Kailey wriggles like a worm, trying to free herself. Alex loses his balance and ends up dumping himself and Kailey over the top rope! Left in the ring now are Shannon Micheals and Ragin', who both have about shook out any cobwebs. Ragin' charges and goes for a Clothesline only for Shannon to boot the Matser of Rage in the gut, then send a wild Haymaker across Ragin's face! He boots Ragin' in the gut again AND GRABS RAGIN' IN A THREE QUARTER FACELOCK!

JH: B.T.-- NO!

Ragin' shoves Shannon to the ropes. Shannon rebounds right to a boot to his midsection! Ragin' grabs ahold of Shannon and pushes him into a Standing Headscissors, lifts AND POWERBO-- NO! Shannon swivels on Ragin's shoulders to a Victory Roll position! Shannon then starts to roll Ragin' up! But Ragin' catches Shannon before he can, lifts Shannon and himself back to a vertical base AND SLAMS SHANNON FACE FIRST INTO THE MAT!

JH: FEATURE REMOVER!

On the outside, Alex witnesses his tag partner getting slam face first into the mat. As he sees Ragin' begin to make a cover, Alex slides up to the apron only for Kailey to yank him back to the floor and lock him in a Cobra Clutch!

JH: SOUTHERN DISCOMFORT!

Alex tries his damndest to wriggle free, but Kailey synches it in tighter, grapevining her legs around Alex's leg in the process. Meanwhile Ragin' rolls Alex into the cover. . .

[align=center]ONE!



TWO!



THREE!
[/align]

[align=center]RED WARRRRRRRR

Red Wars blares over the speaker system. After the loud declaration Rick Sullivan steps out with a very nasty and raged face, followed by Cookie, shouting encouragement to the angered Sullivan.
[/align]

JH: Rick Sullivan?! What the hell is he doing here?!

[align=center]RED WARRRRRRRR

Sullivan charges down the rampway like a bull seeing red, growling out explatives while Cookie stays atop the TNT Stage, shouting words of destruction to Sullivan.

RED WARRRRRRRR[/align]

Sullivan reahces the ring apron, climbs through the ropes and leaps at Ragin' and Shannon Micheals! Ragin' manages to climb out of the way, leaving Micheals to Rick Sullivan. Sullivan mounts Shannon Micheals and rains heavy closed fists right between Shannon's eyes!


JH: What the hell?! What would prompt this?!

TM: Who cares?! He's beating the tar out of Shannon Micheals! Don't question it!

As Sullivan lays in heavy Jabs to Shannon's face, out of the corner of his eye he spots Alex Evans climbing to the apron (cause Kailey appearantly released the Southern Discomfort when Ragin' pinned Shannon). Sullivan leaps to his feet and charges Alex Evans, but Evans jumps from the apron to the floor, a look of extreme confusion on his face. Kailey Lane, who's about reached the rampway, looks on with confusion as well. Ragin', who's made it to his feet, is standing at a nearby corner, witnessing Sullivan's madess first hand. Ragin' cracks a couple chuckles, which Sullivan hears and gets right in Ragin's face!

JH: Oh my God! Sullivan isn't intimidated at all by the three time World Champion!

Sullivan growls loudly, the muscles and veins in his neck, hell, his whole body flexing and pulsing. He growls like a feral animal, begging for Ragin' to lay a finger on him! Ragin' gets right back in Sullivan's face, exchanging several impolite words with the maniacal Sullivan. Dammit, Sullivan can't take it no more! He reels a closed fist back ONLY FOR SHANNON MICHEALS TO SPIN HIM AROUND RIGHT INTO A B.T.H.!

JH: B.T.H.! BAD THING HA-- OH MY GAWD!

Sullivan immediately climbs back to his feet, an open palm slamming the mat in... frustration? Anger? Intensity? It's Rick Sullivan, how should I know?! Shannon climbs back to a vertical base as well and once he turns around, his face contorts to total shock!

JH: Rick Sullivan just took Shannon Micheals' signature finisher!

TM: I know! HE'S AMAZING!

Shannon charges, looking to Lariat Sullivan but Sullivan ducks AND TIGER SUPLEXES SHANNON ON THE CROWN OF HIS HEAD! Sullivan immediately rolls Shannon to his belly, where Sullivan mounts atop Shannon and applies a Camel Clutch! We then cue up at tne entryway, where Cookie yells at the top of his lungs "SHSHSHSHSHADES OF THE IRON SHSHSHSHSHEIK! SHSHSHSHADES OF THE IRON SHEIK!"

JH: Camel Clutch on Shannon Micheals from Sullivan! With no prompting or anything! The man is out of his mind!

TM: I know, ain't it great?!

5 or 6 Security members rush from the back, trying as hard as they can to pry the enraged Sullivan off of 'The Flaming Dragon!' And after what seems like an eternity, Sullivan finally releases his hold on Micheals. Sullivan climbs to his feet, looking out into the booing crowd. He growls maniacally down at Shannon Micheals, then goes after him again but the 6 members of Security surround Shannon. Cookie has made his way down the rampway and stands on the apron, calling out to Sullivan "C'MON, RICK! WE DID WHAT WE NEEDED TO DO! LET'S GET OUTTA THIS DUMP!" Sullivan looks back over to Cookie and heads his manager words, climbing over the 2nd rope onto the walkway. Probot's 'Red War' explodes back over the PA as Sullivan raises his fists to the air while Cookie yells about his boy, Sullivan.

JH: What was a great tag team encounter that turned into absolute chaos! What's going to come of this?!

[align=center]*Commercial Break*[/align]
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TNT returns live with the focus on the announcers table.

JH: Excuse me Thomas; I have something to take care of.

TM: Something to take care of? Why are you getting up? Where the hell are you going? Hitchen!

Moore's calls to his partner go unnoticed as Hitchen removes his headset and steps into the ring with a microphone in his hand. Hitchen looks out towards the crowd as they murmur to themselves. Finally, after a nod towards the back, Hitchen begins to speak.

JH: Ladies and gentlemen, fans of Tuesday Night Throwdown, I have a special announcement to make. Last week we all saw a promo for a new member of TNT. He said he was coming, and he has arrived. I could tell you who he is but that would be selling him short. So, without further ado, here he is!

The lights in the arena go out and there is nothing but silence amongst the darkness. After what seems like and eternity, two bright balls of white light explode from the TNT ring. Yelling and screaming can be heard as well as some screams of FIRE! After a few more moments the lights go back on. In the ring stands a man with his head down. He is dressed in dark blue tights and wristbands with a white lightning motif. Some people begin to cheer, some begin to boo, but all seemingly know who he is. He lifts his head and smiles while looking out to the crowd. He sticks one fist in the air with a microphone wrapped tightly in it. The cheers finally drown out the boos as he brings the mic to his lips.

Hello everyone!

The crowd cheers louder and a few people start jumping up and down.

Thank you for that warm welcome. For those of you who don't know, my name is Rob Storm... and you had better believe I am on TNT!

The crowd is really going bonkers as Storm smiles and waves, waiting for the fans to settle down. When they quiet down to a low roar, Storm takes the opportunity to speak once again

Thank you again... really. It means a lot to an old-timer like me. As I said, my name is Rob Storm, and I am officially a member of Tuesday Night Throwdown. I came up on Rising and was the first person from developmental to get to a main roster. I ended up on Slam! and, despite the hatred of the fans for each show, I was treated wonderfully. I even made a return appearance for a while after I left initially. It was a wonderful experience and when I left that second time I really thought in my heart and mind that I was done. I was wrong, and standing here in this ring looking out at all of you, I'm glad I was wrong!

The crowd starts a loud STORM chant as the man himself waits for it to die down before talking.

After that second run on Slam! I packed my bags and went home to Valrico, Florida. I was doing pretty well for myself too. I had saved my money and bought a nice home, had two very loving dogs and a regular 9-5 job. Everything was great... except that people kept asking me one question. They kept asking me why I wasn't wrestling anymore when they could see I still had a lot to give. I had catchy answers ready as I expected I'd get questions. I told people my body was beat up, which it was. I told people I had accomplished a lot, which I had. I told people it was great to be home, which it was. What I didn't expect was that the same thing that they kept asking me would make me challenge my own decision. So, after talking to my best friend in the world, the man who knows me better than even I do sometimes, I decided to start training. Then start working in the ring again. If all that felt good I'd go one step at a time. That final step is here in this ring before you. A final step that has led to a new beginning.

The crowd applauds as Storm paces about some before looking out at the masses once more.

So when I felt I was ready I decided to pick up the phone and call Madison Lee. Now, a lot of the boys won't admit this, but they watch the other show when they can. Before and after I was on Slam! I saw a lot of TNT. I also liked what I saw and I remember the names that came before me. Fearod! Whippet! Wiggum! Kennedy! Jim O'Brien! Tier! The list goes on... and on... and on! There is here, just like on Slam!, a Pantheon of greatness that has stepped between these ropes. I've been part of the one on Rising and I was lucky enough to be on the one on Slam! I decided that I wanted to complete the trinity and finish, in all probability my career, here on Tuesday Night Throwdown!

A HUGE TNT chant starts and Storm pumps his fist to the chants.

So, as I said, I called up Ms. Lee and asked her if she thought I had what it takes to be part of this roster. She said that wasn't important. She said did I think I still had what it took to be at my peak performance. I said yes, she let me know that she expected nothing less than 100%, and we worked from there. So here I am, in front of all of you live, and those of you watching on television.

The crowd applauds.

Before I leave I want to promise you a few things before the rest of the show goes on. I promise that I will never give you less than that 100%. I promise that I will never embarrass you or this brand. I promise that I will wrestle as hard as I can and do the best to entertain you even if I am hurt or not. Lastly, I promise that when you leave a show that I perform on you will always have something positive to go home with. Thank you all for your time and I hope to see you again very soon! Thank you!

Storm shakes hands with as many fans as he can before he disappears to the back.

Cutting backstage, we enter a locker room belonging to none other than Kailey Lane. Hitting her locker room, Kailey rolls her shoulders and sighs as she tries to work out the kinks. She'll be sore in the morning, but what else is new? Needing the comfort of soft sweats, she starts to unbuckle her chaps, but stops dead in her tracks. One of the locker doors is ajar. She closes her eyes and shakes her head, then looks up to the ceiling as if expecting an answer.

Kailey: Not again...

Looking around the room, she sees a broom in the corner. Watching the locker door as if someone or something were going to pop out at any moment, she tiptoes over to the broom and grabs it up, holding it in front of her like a weapon.

First, one rose accompanied by a note written in very familiar handwriting, then three roses with another note written in familiar yet distinctly different handwriting. What now? Who the heck was trying to freak her out? And darn if it wasn't working!


Kailey: *whispering* Come on, Kailey-girl, get a grip... Maybe you just left it open...

But she knows better than that. She used the first locker in the row. This one is in the middle. She takes a deep breath and moves tentatively to the partially open locker, broom at the ready. Poking the end of the broom handle into the dark space, she leverages the door open.

At the back of the locker is a note, stuck viciously in place by a small throwing knife. Because of her martial arts training, she is very familiar with these kinds of knives, and the velocity it took to stick it that deeply into the locker ... Kailey shivers. Just below the note is a bundle of white roses, hung carefully from the knife's handle cutout by some thick twine.

A thought crosses her mind and, stepping back from the locker, she sets the broom aside so she can dig in her bag for her cell phone. As an afterthought, she pulls out a scarf, too, then centering herself in front of the locker, she takes a couple of pictures with her phone, just in case. Afterall, this isn't the first time this has happened and, by the looks of it, it won't be the last. She tosses her cell phone on top of her bag and then uses the scarf to pull the note away, unfolding it as she pulls backward.


Quote:
 
[align=center]Bad Move.

Love,
an Enigma[/align]


Totally baffled, Kailey stares at the note, which is again written in familiar handwriting. The camera fades out on Kailey's completely puzzled face.

[align=center]*Commercial Break*[/align]

Fading in from the chorus, Rob Zombie's new rock n' roll hit jams to life.

[align=center]We all pray for 20 innocents
We all bow down - 20 innocents
We all hang high - 20 innocents
We all accused 20 innocents
[/align]
The lights flicker out, then back on; Sam Kinloch smiling evilly onstage.

MA: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for ONE fall and is for the TNT Fighting Spirit Championship! Introducing first, currently residing outside of Mission, Texas… she is a former Openweight Champion… SAM! KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINLOOOOOCK!!!

The end of the goody-two-shoes American witch struts down to the ring, smirking at the FIW fans before entering through the ropes.

JH: Sam Kinloch as impressive as ever since her return, earning herself a title shot last week by pinning Loon in a tag match… that became a handicap match when Graver walked off!

TM: He didn’t “walk off”, Hitchen. He gave Loon an opportunity. And like usual, Loon blew it. Sam totally deserves this match, after all the hard work she’s put out.

[align=center]Do you wanna know where their dreams come from?
Some showed the faith and some showed none.
Do you wanna know where their dreams come from?
Some showed the faith and some showed none.
[/align]
The lights suddenly cut again, Sam center-ring. The music hits its eerie interlude, and as the guitar rocks back in, the lights above spark and pop, returning to life as Sam leans into her corner, waiting the beginning of the match.

[align=center]"One time I saw a filipino cab driver cut out a cancer with a rusty butter knife."[/align]

The ultra-heavy guitars of Rob Zombie's new single "Let it All Bleed Out" rock into our ears as the lights begin to flash white and red in strobe. Smoke pours from the entryway, the drums explode into existence, and a familiar face comes rockin' out onstage.

[align=center]BLEED!
BLEED!

BLEED IT OUT!

YEAH!
[/align]
Graver steps past the strobes and fog so that his whole body is visible, getting pelted by boos and a few pieces of garbage.

MA: And her opponent! He is your TNT Fighting Spirit Champion… THIS! IS! GRRRRRAAYVERRRRRRR!!!

He slaps the gold around his waist a few times before raising both hands in a double deuce to his "fans" and making his way to the ring. He ducks under the top rope, raising both arms to New York salute everyone behind him, Stone Cold-style.

TM: Now Hitchen, THIS is a man the fans can get behind.

JH: Oh yes, Thomas. They’ll get behind him. They’ll form a damn line, so long as it’s to push him off a cliff.

TM: Your metaphor is dumb. You lose.

Graver moves to the nearest turnbuckle and springs up on top of it, pointing to a fan and mocking him before taking the title off his waist and holding it up by the strap, flipping one last bird with the other hand. Graver hops down and hands the title to the referee, giving very specific instructions as to its treatment while out of his care.

[align=center]Ding-ding![/align]

And the match is underway! The fans cheer as Graver appears to be deeply analyzing his opponent. Sam just shakes her head and puts up her hands in a fighting stance. Graver, of course, mocks her by getting in a boxer’s stance, and the two circle each other, Graver throwing shadow punches and thumbing his nose.

JH: He’s just disrespectful, Thomas. He’s a troublemaker, and he’s damn disrespectful!

TM: Duh. That’s what makes him awesome.

Sam tires of the charade and runs toward him, leaping into the air with a spinning wheel kick! But Graver sees it coming and ducks down, Sam flying overhead and I-M-P-R-E-S-S-I-V-E-L-Y lands on her feet! The fans applaud , and the now-standing Graver smiles and nods, thinking it’s for him. Those thoughts end when Sam turns around to deliver a HARSH roundhouse kick to the back of Graver’s head!

JH: And down goes the champ!

TM: Hey, shut it, Hitchen! Graver’s not ultra-huge like SOME champs. Hell, there’s not even much of a height/weight difference between the two!

JH: Which is why Sam has every opportunity to take the title in this match!

Sam walks over the fallen champion’s body before he has a chance to rise and applies a sleeper hold while sitting on his back. Graver wriggles, trying to buck Sam off his back, but she’s got both feet planted firmly on the ground.

JH: Interesting camel clutch variant by Sam Kinloch, sort of a mounted sleeper, there.

TM: Yeah, well, enjoy it while it lasts, Hitchen, ‘cuz Graver’s gonna break out of it before long!

Michaela Menendez squats down near Graver’s face, asking him if he’s ready to tap. He shakes his head, widening his eyes to try to stave off the sleepy effect of a sleeper hold.

JH: Expertly applied sleeper! Graver looks to be actually falling asleep! I haven’t seen a sleeper do that in some time!

TM: Bah! She probably put some witchy herbs on it or something! She’s sneaky, Jonathan!

Graver’s eyes drift, but he shakes his head and snaps them back open, kicking his feet and prying at Sam’s arms with both hands. Michaela checks around the hold to make sure Sam’s not choking Graver, but obviously she wouldn’t stoop so low, and the submission continues.

TM: This is crap! This match isn’t gonna end so soon! The Fighting Spirit Championship can’t change hands like that!

JH: It can, and it just might! Graver looks to be buying a few bus tickets to Dream Street right now!

An almost obvious realization pops into Graver’s sleep-rimmed eyes, and he throws a fist VIOLENTLY up into Sam’s face! It connects with a CRACK and Sam loosens the hold just enough for Graver to wrench free!

TM: YES! It’s not o-ver! *clap clap clap clap clap*

Sam rubs her cheek while glaring at the Fighting Spirit Champion, and Graver crawls to a corner before pulling himself up on the ropes. He shakes his head a few times and blinks before squinting, scratching his balls, and hocking a loogie to the outside.

JH: That’s just disgusting.

TM: Nuh-uh! AWESOME! I think it hit a camera guy!

Sam looks rather unimpressed by the display, and makes her way toward the corner. Graver suddenly charges outward and GRABS Sam by the head, DRIVING her forcefully into the mat!

TM: Hell yeah! Take her down to Crippletown, Graver!

JH: I think Rob Zombie has enough of FIW’s money, you don’t need to be making references to his songs as well, Thomas.

Graver lays a few stomps to Sam’s ribs before rebounding off the ropes and DRIVING an elbow point into the mat where Sam just was!

JH: And Sam rolls out of the way at the last second!

TM: Canvas and plywood CAN’T feel good on your elbow, Hitchen.

Sam rolls to her feet and rebounds off of her set of ropes, coming back with a DROPKICK TO THE FACE, JUST as Graver pushes off the mat!!

JH: That move there, just asserts the dominance Sam is having on this match!

TM: It’s not FAIR! The FSC should NOT get owned!

Sam pulls Graver vertical and gifts him a pair of kicks to the kidneys. She fires him into the ropes, and poises to catch him--BUT GETS FLOORED WITH AN STO!!

TM: ONE SECOND COOLLLLAAAAAAAAPSSSS!!!

Graver exhales, rolling his eyes slowly in thanks to whatever changes the tide of this match. He KICKS Sam hard in the head before pulling her up and forcing her into the nearby corner. Graver starts off with a STRONG elbow smash, then moves into a headbutt, and follows with a knee lift!

TM: HA! Now Sam is trapped In the Pit!

Sam looks to be reeling, but as Graver rolls another elbow smash, Sam CATCHES his arm and wrenches it loosely, flowing into a toe kick and DROPPING GRAVER TO THE MAT WITH A DDT!!!

TM: NO!

JH: Khem Raqs Sharqi! Nice performance, great reversal to Graver’s assault.

TM: It’s NOT great! What would’ve been great is Graver continuing to kick her damn witchy ass!

Sam covers Graver with a lateral press and Michaela drops for a count.

[align=center]ONE!



TWO!!



T-
NO! Graver shoves Sam away![/align]

JH: Close call, Sam might’ve had that if she’d hooked the leg.

TM: Yeah, well she didn’t. So shut the fuck up.

JH: Rowr. Someone woke up on the wrong side of my mom this morning.

TM: Those jokes are way less cool when you make them.

Graver uses the ropes to help himself up, waving his hands in disgust and walking toward the entrance ramp. Sam spies him attempting to leave, and runs behind him, JUMPING onto his back and wrapping both arms around his head once more!

TM: Dammit! Quit that!

JH: Another sleeper hold by Sam Kinloch, this one with a body scissor applied as well.

Graver remains hunched over, grimacing at his ill luck. He runs around the ring for a little bit, wiggling his body in an attempt to shake Sam off. He finally manages to align himself facing away from a turnbuckle, and charges backward full-speed to SMASH Sam between the turnbuckle pads and his back!

TM: That’s our Graver! Innovative, intelligent, awesome.

JH: He hasn’t got the witch off his back just yet, Thomas.

Indeed, Sam is still holding on tight, he face a picture of stinging pain. Graver narrows his eyes, takes a few steps forward, and RAMS SAM INTO THE TURNBUCKLE AGAIN!!

TM: WHOO! That’s it Graver! Punish the dumb bitch! Make her feel the pain! Use your fury to put the fear into her! This is the end!

JH: You’re sorrow and joy away from having a Cobra Unit.

TM: … what?

Sam still doesn’t relinquish the hold, and it’s clear it’s once again having effect on Graver. He staggers forward, but before he can slam her into the turnbuckle again, Sam wiggles her body, destroying Graver’s balance and taking him down to the mat! Sam PULLS on his head, but suddenly hears an odd count!

[align=center]ONE!



TWO!!



TH--
Sam rolls over onto her side, Graver in tow![/align]

JH: That would’ve been awfully unlucky for Sam, losing the match because of her own move.

TM: But great for Graver!

Sam fixes her hold on Graver, but it looks like it’s had its effect. He appears to be one thumb-sucking away from nappy time. As such, Michaela raises his hand to see if he’s still with us. It falls, and she looks up, counting to the audience.

[align=center]ONE![/align]

JH: This could be it, Thomas.

TM: No it CAN’T! That witch-bitch isn’t taking the FSC and that’s THAT!

Michaela grabs Graver by the wrist again, raising his arm to let it fall. She calls out to the crowd once more.

[align=center]TWO![/align]

Michaela grabs Graver’s arm and pulls it into the air, and JUST before she lets it drop, none other than the Loon hops out over the barricade and darts into the ring, a steel chair in his fists! He CRACKS it across Sam’s back, and the Oklahoma native releases the sleeper! Michaela calls for the bell!

JH: What in the hell!?

MA: Your winner… as a result of a disqualification… SAM! KIIIIIIINOOOOOCK!!!

TM: What the fuck!? NO!

MA: … and because of the disqualification, STILL your Fighting Spirit Champion… GRRRRAAAVERRRRRRRR!!

TM: Oh, well then that’s fine.

JH: Why did Loon attack Sam!?

TM: I dunno. Maybe ‘cuz she handed him his ass last week.

Loon drops the chair and seems to disregard Sam, instead making for Graver’s now-rousing form. Loon squats in front of him pulling out a fuchsia sharpie from his pocket. He takes off the cap with his teeth and holds Graver’s chin before writing on his forehead!

TM: What the fuck is he DOING!?

JH: I… I don’t know! This isn’t like Loon!

TM: Yeah, seriously, since when does HE make an impact?

Loon pulls away and recaps his sharpie before picking up his chair and exiting the ring. He smiles as he walks backward toward the stage. The camera focuses on Graver’s head to see a message written in pink.

[align=center]2.5 + FSC = NEXT WEEK!!![/align]

JH: It looks like Loon is issuing a challenge to Graver!

TM: And it also looks like Sam isn’t at ALL happy about it!

The fuming challenger for the FSC is up again, holding the ropes and shaking with rage. Suddenly, one of the overhead lights BURSTS and small bits of glass tinkle down onto the ring. Loon looks a little shocked, but shakes his head and smiles, pointing to himself. We fade to commercial on Sam’s FURIOUS expression.

The cameras cut backstage to find Swytch seated on a steel chair as Kennedy stands, straddling one of his legs. She holds onto the back of his head as he looks up at her, their conversation not picked up by the cameras.

JH: There you see Kennedy, along with Swytch.

TM: I wonder what lesson this is he’s teaching her right now.

Kennedy backs away from Swytch, curling her finger to call Swytch after her. The Dual Crown Champion rises and follows his student off-camera.

TM: Hey! Where are they going? Can we follow them?

JH: They’re coming out here, you idiot! Kennedy will be going one-on-one with Carl Lucas. And it’s next!

[align=center]*Commercial Break*[/align]

JH: Thomas, it’s main-event time now!

TM: What an exciting night, Jonathan!

JH: I know! So much has happened tonight! Remy Barteaux upsetting the skull cowboy and Rob Storm debuts in Tuesday Night Throwdown!

TM: What? Oh. Yeah, yeah, whatever. I just meant Kennedy’s return to the ring! Main-Event-Style!

The house lights fade as the opening chord to Rob Zombie's "Living Dead Girl" rips through the speakers. As the chorus quickly follows, white strobes blink in time with the hard beats.

[align=center]Crawl on me, sink into me
Die for me, living dead girl
Crawl on me, sink into me
Die for me, living dead girl
[/align]

Kennedy makes her way through the curtain, holding onto a silver chain hanging over her shoulder. As she steps further out onto the stage, another figure follows out behind her. It’s quickly revealed as Swytch, the chain in Kennedy’s hand connected to his collar. Kennedy stops at the center of the stage, turning to face her mentor. She gives the chain a hard tug, dragging Swytch over to her. Her hands moves up to his ears, holding onto his head as she moves her lips onto his, their tongues meeting before their lips do. Kennedy pulls away, heading towards the ring with the chain held at her side, Swytch following just a mere three feet behind.

TM: Whew. Look at that, Jonathan. I bet she’s so dominating in bed. Just like in the ring.

JH: Really? I would’ve thought Swytch was the dominant one.

TM: Hmm? Oh, he’s not there when I imagine her in bed.

[align=center]Psyclone Jack, Hallucinating Hack
Thinks Donna Reed, eats dollar bills
Goldfoot machine, creates another fiend
So Beautiful, they make you kill
[/align]

Reaching the ring, she grabs onto the top rope and glances back at Swytch, awaiting him to tread the apron to climb the nearby turnbuckle. But his chain restricts him before he gets there, prompting Kennedy to pull him back over to her. Again their lips inch towards one another until Kennedy unhooks the chain from his collar and lets the beast mount the turnbuckle as she steps in over the middle rope.

MA: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, now entering the ring from Los Angeles, California; being accompanied by the Dual Crown Champion Swytch! She is… KEEEENNNNNEEEDDDYYYY!!!!

JH: Kennedy had some very colorful comments towards Carl this past week. Picking on his past and how he’s a good man that regrets what he’s done.

TM: Weak man. Kennedy didn’t just expose Carl’s weakness. She ripped it out and played with it. It was awesome.

JH: Kennedy was merciless. Just like last week when she illegally got involved in Carl’s match with her… mentor Swytch.

TM: Mentor. Heh. Yeah, right. I didn’t know that’s what kids were calling that nowadays. I’d love to mentor her myself.

[align=center]Crawl on me, sink into me
Die for me, living dead girl
Crawl on me, sink into me
Die for me, living dead girl
[/align]

Kennedy makes her way to the ropes, stepping one foot on the bottom rope and the other on the middle rope as the pair look out over the crowd. She drops back to the canvas as Swytch stares down on her from the top turnbuckle. She backs into the center of the ring, allowing him to step over the ropes and drops into the ring. He walks right up on Kennedy, staring down into her eyes. She brings her hands up on his collar, their lips teasing a kiss before they pull apart and turn their attention to the upcoming contest, the chain now latched back onto Swytch’s collar.

JH: All your sexual jokes aside, what is your thoughts on this, Thomas? I mean, we all know how you feel about Kennedy. You’ve made that obvious. But you hate Swytch.

TM: Like I said last week, Jonathan. If Kennedy can look past his MANY faults and be his friend, well then he can’t be all that bad.

JH: Madison still doesn’t like him at all. You do know that, right?

TM: Well… it’s hard being stuck in the middle of two women like Madison and Kennedy.

JH: Of course they’d have to be aware you even exist before you’re stuck between them. Which they are not aware of.

“Hey Now” hits the speakers and the crowd explode for their favorite silent giant. Strobes search the auditorium before returning to the entranceway to pick out his massive silhouette cast against the entrance.


[align=center]I'm a menace to society baby
The police wanna relocate me
They running with gun up but they can't fade me
They wanted to come up but they ain't crazy
I ride one in the chamber, gun on cock
'6-tre Chevrolet rollin without no top
Got them hydraulics that's dumping, making it drop
California to Virginia Timmy making it hot[/align]

He steps forward onto the walkway, his title belt sparkling under the house lights, his eyes focused completely on the ring as he begins his trek toward the ring, remaining as stoic as ever.


MA: And the opponent. Weighing in at three hundred and thirty-eight pounds; from New Orleans, Louisiana; he is one-half of the FIW Tag Team Champions… CARLLLL LLLUUUCCCAAASSSS!!!

TM: Now this is a lot of man right here, Jonathan.

JH: Is he now?

TM: Stop with the immature jokes. They only work when I pull them on you. Actually, I was wrong anyways. He comes the littlest big man you’ll ever see.

JH: What’s that supposed to mean?

TM: He’s a huge man that’s too pathetic to own up to his violent past. A little, big man. Sickening to look at, actually.

[align=center]Taking long rides in the G4 plane
X Man to the stage, got 'em going insane
Yeah! Got the world saying my name
I'm bout to make a little change, I'ma keep it the same, ya dig
X to the Z baby, run up on you hitting corners
Phantom platinum grill
X be the life of the party, c'mon!
Don't be scared girl, reach out and touch somebody[/align]

As the chorus kicks in the Cajun reaches the ring, stepping in over the top rope. He removes his strap and hands it to the ref before walking across the ring, grabbing a hold of the top set of cables and tugging at them as if to test their integrity. Seemingly happy they can hold his weight, Carl turns his attention on the twosome in the opposite corner, awaiting the start of the match.


TM: You know, Remy was the first match on the card tonight. You think he’d come out here and try to support Carl. Although, maybe he doesn’t want to be seen with such a pathetic piece of trash.

JH: Remy has a lot going on at the moment, Thomas. In fact, he wrestled tonight’s match with almost no notice.

TM: He knew all week he was gonna be wrestling the skull cowboy!

JH: He didn’t know it was gonna be the first match of the night!

TM: Well, expect the unexpected.

[align=center]"Hey amigos . . ."[/align]

JH: What the…?

Rich mariachi music begins to play, scintilating the crowd with the promise of something spicy. However, nothing spicy this way comes as the lights cut and the entryway is illuminated a dusty yellow. The giant shape of the skull cowboy lumbers onstage as Rammstein's familiar thundering guitars kick in. He stands with his legs shoulder width apart and his head bowed. A caw is heard and a huge raven flies down from the rafters, lighting on the cowboy's left shoulder. He dredges toward the ring with methodical slowness, paying no mind to the fans as they cheer both ways on either side of him. He descends the stairs, parking himself at ringside in a very bemused Carl Lucas’ corner.

TM: I told you, Jonathan! Expect the unexpected.

JH: Well the playing field has gotten a little more… is it level?

TM: Kennedy has Swytch in her corner, Carl has his tag team partner the skull cowboy in his corner. Looks level to me.

Tony Clarke looks as confused as everyone else but there isn’t much that can be done about it. He signals for the bell to start the match and no sooner than it rings out over the arena does Swytch jumps onto the apron. Carl swats at the Dual Crown Champion but Swytch backs off just in the nick of time. TC pulls Carl back and yells at warning down to Swytch.

JH: Just eject him, ref! Send him backstage so that-- A LOW BLOW!

TM: I wouldn’t say that was low. Swytch only jumped on the apron.

JH: No! A low blow to Carl from Kennedy!

TM: You’re seeing things.

If Hitchen’s seeing things, then Carl’s feeling make-believe things because the man is pain now. Kennedy acts as if it didn’t happen once Tony Clarke turns around but it’s mightily suspicious with the way Carl is tending to himself. Kennedy grabs Carl around the throat and falls back, lifting her knees up to DRIVE THEM INTO CARL’S BACK!

JH: An obvious distraction from Swytch, giving Kennedy the immediate upperhand in this match.

TM: Kennedy didn’t need Swytch to overtake a coward like Carl.

JH: Lucky for Carl he’s got cowboy in his corner. I hope you can hear my sarcasm.

Skull cowboy remains in Carl’s corner, his eyeless sockets remaining focused on the happenings but he doesn’t move a muscle as he watches Carl trying to fend off Kennedy and her mentor. Carl arches his back in pain as he rolls over onto his stomach, pushing up onto his hands and knees right before he finds a soccer kick upside his face! Carl falls backwards onto the canvas, allowing Kennedy to step over him and MOONSAULT ONTO HIM! Kennedy covers!


[align=center]ONE!


TW-- KICK OUT!!
[/align]


Kennedy gets back to her feet, pulling herself onto the second turnbuckle as Carl attempts to reclaim his feet. Kennedy leaps off the ‘buckle and gets caught by Carl! He wraps his arms around Kennedy’s body and starts flinging her from side to side like rag doll!

TM: Oh my God! What’s he doing to poor Kennedy?

JH: “Poor Kennedy” is becoming acquainted to Carl’s Bear Hug.

TM: He better keep his Bear Hung away from her!

JH: I said Bear Hug.

TM: It didn’t always used to be called that.

Carl throws Kennedy down to the canvas. He hesitates no more than a second before dragging her back up and applying a sleeper around her knee. He lifts the woman off the canvas, causing her to kick her legs in desperation as the sleeper is synched in tighter. Tony Clarke checks to find that it’s not so much a sleeper as it’s a blatant (yet unintended) choke from the big man!

TC: ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

Carl releases Kennedy’s throat, causing her limp body to land in a heap at his feet. Carl glares in TC’s direction before dragging Kennedy back up to her feet. Kennedy knocks his arms away and fires a right hand upside his head! A second! A third! A fourth! And Carl no sells them all. He grabs Kennedy around the throat with one large hand, backing her straight into the turnbuckle! TC gets in Carl’s face, trying to force the man to release Kennedy’s throat.

TM: Can’t he just disqualify him?

JH: He could. Same as if he saw Kennedy’s low blow Carl early. I don’t know if it was that, Swytch, or what Kennedy said earlier but something seems to have angered Carl.

TM: Or it could be his tag team partner’s lack of assistance. Cowboy or Remy. Take your pick.

Cowboy continues to watch the match unfold, his expressionless face… well, expressionless. Carl, on the other hand, has long broken his stoic expression as anger surges through his actions as well as his snarling facial expressions. He doesn’t release his hold on Kennedy’s throat but rather shifts to a military press, lifting Kennedy with extreme ease. He steps out into the center of the ring before throwing her all the way back down to the canvas!

TM: Angered or not, Carl’s still got a huge strength advantage over Kennedy.

JH: And he’s not shy about showing it.

Kennedy scrambles along the mat, backing into the corner as Carl stalks towards her. Kennedy grabs the middle rope and uses them to pick herself up, driving a kick into Carl’s gut as he attempts to advance on her! Unfazed, he tries the second time with the same result. Kennedy grabs the top rope and flips herself onto the top turnbuckle. She climbs to her feet and CARL KNOCKS THEM OUT FROM UNDER HER!

JH: Looks like Kennedy was trying to unleash her aerial arsenal but Carl but a stop to that quick.

TM: Acts of a desperate man.

Carl drags his large frame up to the second rope, grabbing Kennedy in a front facelock before Kennedy begins burying right hands into his stomach. She uses all her strength to shove the massive man backwards, crashing into a canvas with an echoing impact! Kennedy climbs back to her feet, perched up top as she waits for Carl to regain his footing.

JH: Lucky for Kennedy she was able to get the better of that situation.

TM: Lucky for Carl! Imagine if he superplexed Kennedy? He’d mope about it for weeks. That’s what a conscience gets you.

JH: I doubt Carl would shed any tears over Kennedy getting what she deserves.

Carl gets back up, shaking his head clear as Kennedy leaps off the top rope, landing on the big man’s shoulders! She tightens her legs around his neck, firing right hands into his face before whipping herself backwards and DRIVING CARL’S HEAD INTO THE CANVAS!!

JH: The HurraKennedy! Shades of Swytch with the guillotine strikes first.

TM: She’s learning. At an amazing speed. I bet she’s in the top ten percentile of her class.

JH: I’m sure she’s a real teacher’s pet.

Kennedy is back up now, a little worse for wear as she attempts to shake off the effects of Carl’s power moves. She lands a few stomps on Carl’s back before making her way outside the ring. She pushes Timmy the timekeeper aside and takes away his chair before climbing back onto the apron.

JH: What the hell does she think she’s doing? This isn’t no disqualification!

TM: Maybe Kennedy forget. Carl has been unnecessarily rough.

Tony Clarke fights with Kennedy as she attempts to get back into the ring but Kennedy refuses to relinquish her hold on the chair. Carl pushes himself up on his hands and knees and then finds himself ripped from the ring! Swytch grabs Carl by the ankle and drags the man under the bottom rope! Carl splats at ringside before Swytch wraps his arm around Carl’s neck in a front facelock before drilling into Carl’s chest with stiff knee shots!

JH: Not again! Same thing as last week! Do something cowboy! Don’t just stand there!

TM: He doesn’t look like he has plans to do anything.

JH: What is he even doing out here then?

Skull cowboy does indeed… nothing. He remains stood in the exact same spot, his black eye sockets staring lifelessly in the direction of Swytch’s mugging on Carl across the ring. Swytch ceases his knee assault, dropping backwards and DRILLING CARL’S HEAD INTO THE RINGSIDE MATS! He drags Carl back up by the neck, grabbing him around the back of the neck and the back of his pants, running the tag champ head first into the audience barricades!

JH: Jesus! He could’ve injured Carl’s neck with the move!

TM: Could’ve? Might’ve! This is what happens when you try to mess with someone like Swytch or Kennedy!

JH: So is this all about proving they’re more soulless than Carl? Like that’s something to brag about.

TM: Carl’s just a sympathy-whore.

Swytch lifts Carl’s body back up, throwing him in under the bottom rope before staring across into cowboy’s mask. The two stare down one another, neither man flinching or even trying to intimidate one another.

JH: What’s that about? Are they on the same page? Is Carl being set up here?

TM: I doubt it. Cowboy doesn’t strike me as the type to be on cahoots with people. When he wants something done, he does it himself.

JH: That’s a good point. Not comforting in any way, but a good point.

With Carl laid out in the ring, Kennedy finally gives up the chair like a rule-abiding competitor. TC deposits the chair at ringside as Kennedy steps in under the middle rope. Carl uses the ropes as he attempts to climb back to his feet but Kennedy is nice enough to help him by applying a front facelock on him. She swings her leg AND LANDS BACK-FIRST ON THE CANVAS AS CARL GRABS THE TOP ROPE!

JH: Carl just countered Kennedy’s DDT!

TM: Good for him too. His neck has to be a bad way after what Swytch did to him.

JH: This could be Carl’s chance here!

Carl picks Kennedy up off the canvas, wincing momentarily at the shooting pains in his neck. He grabs Kennedy by the wrist and whips her off the ropes! No! Kennedy holds on, twisting herself around before pulling Carl in to a boot to gut! Carl doubles over, allowing Kennedy to grab him in that front facelock again! She swings her leg and PLANTS HIM WITH AN EVENFLOW DDT!

JH: Kennedy just nailed her DDT! The same DDT she used on Carl post-match last week!

TM: Is it gonna be enough to put Carl away though?

Kennedy thinks so. She covers, hooking Carl’s far leg and grapevining the other. TC jumps into the cover as Swytch watches on with a twisted grin on his black lips. Cowboy remains as emotionless as ever, calmly watching the match unfold.


[align=center]ONE!


TWO!!



THREE!!!
[/align]


Kennedy laughs as “Living Dead Girl” reprises over the speakers, keeping the cover as she looks out at Swytch. She raises to her feet as Clarke takes her arm and raises it in victory, much to the dismay of the crowd.

MA: Here is your winner… KKKEEEENNNNEEEDDDYYY!!!

JH: Carl falls to Kennedy and Swytch once again. But thanks to heavy outside inference.

TM: I wouldn’t say it was heavy. Some. Not heavy.

JH: He ran Carl’s head into the audience barricade! He DDTed him on the floor! Kennedy gave him a low blow!

TM: I thought Carl was supposed to be the ultimate bad boy? Guess Kennedy and Swytch proved him wrong.

JH: Two-on-one, it still isn’t fair!

Swytch climbs into the ring, making his way over to his student. He grabs a handful of her hair and yanks back before planting his lips on her for another stomach-wrenching kiss. Actually, it’s freakin’ sexy and you know it! But since you’re jealous, you can call it gross.

TM: Look at that celebration! Hot stuff.

JH: I guess that’s supposed to be his equivalent to gold stars or something?

The newly formed pair don’t force you to watch their make-out scene so much this week. This isn’t a weekly thing. Come on, people. They’re just a couple. Not a weekly peep show. Unfortunately for you. Anyways, they both exit the ring, happily making their way backstage while Tony Clarke checks on Carl in the ring.

JH: You know, I’d really like to see how Kennedy would’ve done if she didn’t have Swytch in her corner tonight.

TM: I don’t know what you’re say bent out of shape for. Carl had cowboy in his corner. The sides were even.

JH: Oh please! Cowboy didn’t do anything!

TM: So you’re condemning him for following the rules?

JH: I-- stop confusing me! Wait a minute! What’s cowboy doing now?

Cowboy is indeed doing something. Climbing up the steps, cowboy slowly enters the ring by stepping over the middle rope. He calmly crosses the ring until he’s standing just before Carl Lucas. Carl, with the help of Tony Clarke, is reclaiming his feet. He stands tall and jerks back instinctively as he spots the skull mask inches from his face!

TM: Uh-oh. Carl’s gonna pay now!

JH: Pay for what? He didn’t do anything!

TM: I think that’s up to the cowboy to decide.

The black burns into Carl as the Cajun attempts to prepare himself as best as he can for what’s to come. And that’s when it happens! Cowboy… turns around. The skull cowboy turns his back and Carl and makes his exit from the ring to everyone’s confusion. Making his way down the walkway, he simply exits through the curtain as Carl stares after him in bewilderment.

TM: Oh…kay.

JH: I don’t know what that was about but that’s all the time we have tonight ladies and gentleman. Be sure to join us here next week where, apparently, anything can happen!

TM: You wouldn’t dare miss it!

[align=center]-= © FIW. The Best damn E-Fed. PERIOD =-[/align]
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Quick Results:
Remy Barteaux def. the skull cowboy via pinfall

Tag Team Match
April Lynn & Chris Love def. the Funky Bunch (Extreme Ninja #2 & Kendra Norton) when Love pinned Kendra

Nightmare Tag Team Match
Ragin' & Kailey Lane def. Alex Evans & Shannon Micheals when Ragin' pinned Shannon

Fighting Spirit Championship
Sam Kinloch def. Graver via disqualification after Loon 2.5 hit her with a steel chair, allowing Graver to retain the championship

Kennedy def. Carl Lucas via pinfall after interference from Swytch
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