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ReVolt; August 30th, 2006
Topic Started: Aug 31 2006, 05:38 AM (317 Views)
Minister Wighty
Member Avatar
Opossum Queen of FIW
Admin
[align=center]Posted Image

GO
SO FUCKING DETERMINED
YEAH, YEAH
GO
YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT CONFIDENCE

The International champion springs from the corner and scoops down to the mat grabbing up his trusty fork he lost possession of earlier in the match. He quickly drives upward with the handle of the fork and jabs it into the throat of his masked opponent. XK gasps and coughs from the blow to the throat and staggers into a nearby corner where Toan begins to dig the fork into his mask as Kitten swats at his opponents hands in an attempt to remain masked. The Deathmatch Bastard digs in more violently and smiles as he begins to pull up on the mask and Mark Jackson pleads with him to stop!

GO
SO FUCKING DETERMINED
YEAH, YEAH
GO
SPIT OUT ALL REASON
YEAH

Prime dashes in and kicks Matt in the gut before setting up for the Authority Bomb with hands around the King's throat ready to lift but he is stopped by Amy Spencer; who is accusing Prime of knocking her over so he could blind Impact. Impact plays along with the claims while he cleans out his eyes. Prime pleads his case quickly but no quickly enough as Impact can see again. Prime gets around Amy only to get a thumb to the eye for the second time, Amy didn't turn around quick enough to see it. Impact knees Prime in the gut twice before walking him to the middle of the ring and striking him with a third knee to the gut. Impact hoists Prime onto his shoulders. Impact throws Prime around and plants him with the Head on Collision!

I'm tired of holdin' up the weight,
the weight of the motherfuckin' world.
All I want is to just get right


Kailey stumbles backwards into the ropes, holding to them as she eyes Kennedy. She takes in a deep breath and waits as she notices Kennedy stirring on the canvas. Kailey moves to the turnbuckle, pulling herself to the second rope. Kennedy climbs to her feet, dazed and confused. She moves around the canvas, turning JUST AS KAILEY COMES OFF THE SECOND TURNBUCKLE WITH A DOUBLE AXE HANDLE!!! NO!!! Kennedy holds her hands up and breaks the axe handle! She buries her boot into Kailey’s midsection AND PLANTS HER WITH AN IMPLANT DDT!!!

HERE RIGHT NOW !!!

Prime stands up and stands back in a corner. He is considering his strategy as Hutch shows fight to start getting back up. Hutch turns around into a hard right hand from Prime to knock him back down. Hutch gets right back up and gets hammered one more time. Hutch pulls himself up off the canvas and Prime runs through him with a shoulder block, knocking Hutch through the ropes to the outside. Prime pulls Hutch up, slams a knee deep into his gut before looking out at the rabid crowd. Prime claps his arms around Hutch and flips him over...OVERHEAD BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX AND HUTCH IS SENT CRASHING THROUGH THE SLAM! ANNOUNCE TABLE!

We struggle and fight just to get in the grave
That's overflowing.
Clock's ticking on my 15 minutes of fame
Come on now


He rolls himself to the ropes and uses them to haul his ass up, and turns back to his writhing opponent. Quickly he darts to his corner and snatches up his white board, scrawling something on it before showing it to the crowd. It reads “BUST A MOVE!”, and he proceeds to get down with his bad self as he break dances over to the challenger. Once he’s jiggied his way over to the Loon, he pops up and drops a Senton Leg Drop across his head and covers for the pin!

1
2
3...


Nightmare is indeed bleeding profusely, cut open from the staple, Ahriman holds the staple gun high before trying to shoot another staple into Night’s head, he blocks Ahriman’s hand though and after a brief struggle Nightmare picks up Ahriman bearhug style, with a tremendous roar he goes sprinting towards the other entryway railing, driving Ahriman back first into it!

GO
SO FUCKING DETERMINED
YEAH, YEAH
GO
YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT CONFIDENCE

The Fighting Spirit Champion wiggles about as he tries to get out from under Onikage, ending up on his back, and that’s when the Straight Edge Savior applies pressure to his mounted position, keeping the smaller man just as he is as he starts throwing elbow strikes at him, Graver tries to lift up his arms to block them but they are just too strong. At first they start out relatively slow but with each blow the former Ordinary member picks up steam with his shots, steadily making them quicker and quicker as he hammers away on the reigning champ with quite the ruthless aggression, a look in his eyes showing that Onikage seems to have snapped on Graver. Clarke circles around the two of them as Onikage continues to pound the Reject of FIW into grounded meat, Tony’s expression becoming more and more grim as Graver’s body becomes more and more lifeless than it was the previous second, suddenly a few gasps start ringing out through out the arena. A dark crimson liquid starts covering Onikage’s elbow pad and the ends of his black tape, staining them with blood, though it isn’t the only thing that gets coated, soon blood is disturbingly squirting upward from Graver’s face, splashing against Onikage’s mask and upper body, slowly running down it, even a bit splashes onto Tony Clarke!

GO
SO FUCKING DETERMINED
YEAH, YEAH
GO
SPIT OUT ALL REASON
YEAH

Graver suddenly starts swinging his arms around and hopping to strike different poses with his legs as if mocking the martial arts background of two of his challengers. A grin spreads across his face as suddenly he turns to Kiyoshi, spraying a mouthful of beer in mist like fashion, blinding the second biggest man in the match!

I'm flushing the trust of everyone,
stabbing in the back and thinkin' they can break me.
Set my sight can't die until I'm done


Xtreme Kitten tells Johnson to begin to count Kiyoshi out, but Johnson refuses and he points over to Lance who is charging at Xtreme Kitten, but Xtreme Kitten counters Lance’s clothesline attempt with a flapjack. Lance crashes to the canvas, but he is quickly backed up on his feet and he is whipped to the turnbuckle by Xtreme Kitten. Xtreme Kitten charges at Lance for a turnbuckle clothesline, but Lance takes Xtreme Kitten down to the second turnbuckle face first with a drop toe hold. Xtreme Kitten grabs his face as he lies on his back against the turnbuckle. Lance walks over to Xtreme Kitten and grabs him by the arm and Lance wraps his arm around Xtreme Kitten’s neck and he plants him with a DDT. Xtreme Kitten crashes face first into the mat after the botched move!

MIND ENDURANCE!!!

Ragin’ grabs Remy by the hair and moves into a standing headscissor. He grabs Remy around the waist and hoists the Ultimate Endurance Champion onto his shoulders. Ragin’ pushes the Cajun up by the britches, but Remy rolls forward and slides down Ragin’s back!! He grabs Ragin’ by the leg, pulling Ragin’ off his feet. Remy quickly tangles Ragin’s legs up and weaves his own into them then falls backward to the mat! Ragin’ screams out in pain, reaching back to try and break the hold, but unable to bend his body enough. He claws at the mat, trying to reach the ropes but they’re too far out of his reach!

Never wanted any more than what I deserve,
better bring it I'm takin' it all.
Fuck an inch 'cause I'm bringin' a mile,
It's on now


Brighty manages to control his movement drops straight south onto Madrox's chest! MADROX MOVES OUT OF THE WAY! BRIGHTY'S BACKSIDE SLAMS INTO THE CANVAS! Madrox is quickly up to his feet and runs to the ropes as Brighty is getting up. Madrox slides through Brighty's legs and then leaps up on top of Brighty as he turns around...HURRICANRANA! To his credit Brighty is quickly up to his feet but is groggy and vulnerable to Madrox taking him into a corner. Madrox tees off on the former Slam! Superstar of the Year with four hard right hands that go unanswered. Madrox looks for an irish whip across the ring but Brighty holds on to reverse! Madrox is shot into the turnbuckle but he controls himself, he leaps up onto the second rope and SPRINGBOARDS OVER HIS SHOULDER INTO A CROSS BODY BLOCK!

1
2
3...


Whimpering Graver tries his best puppy dog eyes face and tries his best to weasel his way out from Kiyoshi’s grasp, though it is to no avail as Kiyoshi slowly shakes his head no with a grim expression on his face, he surprisingly whips Graver away from him, only to hold on and pull him right back into the welcoming from a vicious lariat! Amazingly the lariat doesn’t take Graver off of his feet, rather he gasps and groans as he tries to talk though it is as if from the sheer impact of the move his wind pipe has been caved in, slowly he staggers backwards as Nakahata releases the hold on his wrist, watching him calmly. Though he doesn’t stand there all day as like a lion stalking it’s prey he marches forward after the champion, looking like he might be in the mood to end this match, but suddenly a hand rests on his shoulder and whips him around, before Nightmare can even say what it seems like he was trying to say, Kiyoshi connects with a palm strike. The palm strike was so powerful it sends Nightmare flying right over the top rope and hitting the apron with a thud

GO
SO FUCKING DETERMINED
YEAH, YEAH
GO
YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT CONFIDENCE

Remy looks shocked down at his victim, expecting a much more beardy, Russiany-type guy under his boot. But he shrugs, not looking a gift horse in the mouth, until he turns around and spies a bear. Ragin’ gets another wicked sneer on his mug before BLASTING REMY IN THE GRILL WITH A HAYMAKER!! Remy’s eyelids flutter, but Ragin’ isn’t done, FORCING his head between his legs, then WRENCHING Remy upward onto his shoulders! Ragin’ tosses Remy’s legs outward, falling into a sit-out position, CRUSHING HIS FACE INTO THE MAT!!!

GO
SO FUCKING DETERMINED
YEAH, YEAH
GO
SPIT OUT ALL REASON
YEAH

Both competitors get back to their feet and Tomoko is the first to move in hooking up Toan and quickly lifts him off his feet with the Tomoko Driver. She drops to a seated position as she completes the finisher and then quickly draws her body over his legs applying as much weight as she can to his shoulders. That is until out of no where she is victim of a devastating Cat Kick to the face and falls backwards on the mat. XK drops his body over Tomoko and hooks a leg. Mark Jackson is already in position from her pin attempt and begins to count!

This fire, is growing, it's burning, deep inside of me.
Focused, driven, certain, the way it's got to be

FIRE, GROWING, BURNING, DEEP INSIDE OF ME!!!
FOCUSED, DRIVEN, CERTAIN, THE WAY IT'S GOT TO BE!!!


Toan gets up to his feet and turns around looking at Kailey, he kicks her in the midsection and he hoist her up into the air with a one arm falcon arrow, but as he is goes to drop her down she is able to counter the move and she lands on her feet. Toan is pissed and he grabs the stop sign and slams it over her head and he whips her into the ropes and as she rebounds back Toan goes for another hiptoss, but Kailey counters the move twirling into a headscissor takedown, but she twirls a couple more times before planting Toan down with a DDT onto the chair in the middle of the ring.

CROOKED (No Trust)
LIAR (Conman)
DRUNK WITH (Power)
MENTOR (Taught me everything that I know)


SO WRONG,
WRONG
WRONG
WRONG


Ninja stirs very little on the canvas as the figure steps over him, dropping the chair to their side. A pair of pale hands reaches up and takes a hold of the hood, whipping it back to reveal. Most of the fans jeer her actions, taking out one of the most popular champions on the roster, while a small contingent of NGIW faithful burst into a chorus of cheers for their favourite hardcore Hellcat! A sick smirk twists her ruby red lips as she takes the zip to her top and slowly peels it open to reveal a shiny, silver belt strapped around her waist. The cameras try to zoom in as she reaches round to her back and unhooks the belt, all the while her eyes fixed on the Cruiserweight champion, her studded tongue moistening her ruby reds. As Ninja tries to push himself off the mat Ghost drops down beside him and grabs the back of his mask, RAMMING his face back down into the canvas. She pulls his head back up and shoves the belt under him, making sure he gets a good, hard look at it.

1
2
3!!!

GO
SO FUCKING DETERMINED


The heavy guitars of Mushroomhead's new jam "Save Us" rock over the fans in attendance as bright white light blasts through the entryway, revealing a silhouette. That black figure moves against the light, trekking toward the ring. The guitars die and the lights turn a moody shade of pale blue. Tier walks through the reaching arms of the fans, face blank and emotionless.

SO FUCKING DETERMINED
GO!!!
[/align]
[align=center]Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted ImagePosted Image[/align]
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Minister Wighty
Member Avatar
Opossum Queen of FIW
Admin
Pyros EXPLODE from one side of the arena to the other in shades of red, white, blue, and green! The ReVolt logo swivels on the VolTrons as Mudvayne's "Determined" thunders across the audience!

Jonathan Hitchen: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the ALLTEL Arena in North Littla Rock, Arkansas, U-S-A! I'm Jonathan Hitchen!

Chip Martin: I'm Chip Martin!

Constance Loire: And I'm Constance Loire! And this! ... is ReVolt!

The screen fades in to show…umm…black. Maybe that’s why we can hear the voices so well. Ya know, blind people having enhanced hearing and that. Wish I was blind…oh, and none of that ‘????’ crap. These people are bloody famous. The audience knows who they are, so should you. We hear the faint scrambles of something being tossed between two people. PHEEW-CLUNK. PHEEW-CLUNK. That sorta noise.

The Majesty – Oi. Watch it.

Fozzy – What, you’re doin’ it.

The Majesty– Nah, stuff yas, Pocco’s holding it. I need to be seen by the women folk. ‘Specially Kailey and Ken. They’re alllll about The Maj. Plus Pocco’s big and ugly.

Apocalypse: Then why am I going out with a Japanese Supermodel?

The Majesty: Bloody hell, Poc, ching-chongs go out with sumo’s. They climb all over Brighty and them. She just wants you for your bod. But that’s alright. Cos, like, we see what’s on the inside.

Fozzy: Mate, you’re so gay.

The Majesty: UNNGGH! I’ll…gay…you. Mo’fo.

Fozzy: Yeah, cheers. Think I’ll be right.

Large cuticles shove their way under the black screen.

Apocalypse: Friggin’…HOW’D YOU GET THIS THING OFF.

Fozzy: I think you have to push in the side-y bits and that.

The cap pops revealing the whiteness of the HP Pavillion halls.

Fozzy: Hey, where’d the blue rabbit go?

The Majesty: What, you mean V-

Vinj: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINJ!!!!

Vinj flips into the view of the camera with his crazy whi-no, BLUE hair, it would seem.

Vinj: Hey turdmongers.

The Majesty: Dude, you’re only here with us cos they booked you on the same flight as Fozz. You can’t use affectionately abusive terms until we get drunk.

Fozzy: Yeah. But I can call Maj a tosser whenever I want. Tosser.

The Majesty: One doesn’t need to toss when they spend the WHOLE night with Jessica Alba and Heidi Klum.

Fozzy: Yeah, spend all night disappointing more than one sheila at a time, and giving it to chicks what are preggers.

Vinj: Hey, if you’re doing it with a pregnant woman does that mean you’re doing it with the baby as well?

Awkward silence.

Vinj: heh-heh. I still got it.

Vinj shrugs his shoulders forward, flexing his…umm…ability to create awkward silences.

The Majesty: Weirdo. So what are we doing, anyways?

Fozzy: Dunno. Just hangin’ round and that… I only came cos youse were.

Vinj: I was promised a bag of lollies…and 10g’s.

Apocalypse: Same. Not the lollies, the 10g’s.

The Majesty: Yeah, I’m getting that too. Don’t need it though. I’m getting the big money from NJPW.

Fozzy: I get lollies sent in to me radio show, got that covered. It’s like magic, I just go ‘alright, anyone listenin’ who sells or makes lollies and that, send ‘em in to the studio and I’ll say your name or somethin’. And they appear. Sometimes it’s other things.

Apocalypse: Why are we still talking? Isn’t it our duty as Australian’s to be piss drunk?

Vinj: I drank once. I think I had a threesome with a kangaroo and a wombat…or I rented ‘The Village’. Either way, something mind-numbingly disturbing happened.

Vinj goes off to sort through his drunken memories.

The Majesty: He serious?

Fozzy: Yeah, you’d have to be drunk to rent ‘The Village’. Only good bit was when that monster thing ran underneath the guard post.

Apocalypse: I’m shutting this camera off. This is boring. And my arms are getting sore as.

The Majesty: Pussy.

Apocalypse: Arms are bigger than yours.

The Majesty: Oh, we are SO having an arm wrestle.

Fozzy: Why don’t you guys just take a shortcut and compare schlongs.

The camera shuts off as the three ockers leave…Vinj is around somewhere too.

CL: I can't believe they let those bloody ockers in the building.

CM: I can't believe you don't like 'em! Comic genius!

CL: Maj is OK, but the rest of 'em can piss off.

JH: They're ALL welcome here, personal invites of the FIW staff. I look forward to their match tonight, but ANOTHER match I'm looking forward to is the debut of a new wrestler; Willow, against that old standby in the Loon 2.5!

[align=center]Posted Image VS. Posted Image[/align]

CL: Joy of joys. Watch as I stab myself in the fucking mouth in sheer elation.

[align=center]Posted Image[/align]
The above smybol flashes on the VolTrons as the tribal drums and whistling cries of The Cure's "Burn" fade into our ears. The lights deaden so we can only see the symbol as guitars begin, and when Robert Smith's vocals finally join the music, a flash occurs onstage.
[align=center]
"Don't look don't look" the shadows breathe
Whispering me away from you
"Don't wake at night to
watch her sleep
You know that you will always lose
This trembling adored
Tousled bird mad girl..."
[/align]
MA: The following match is scheduled for one fall and it is a hardcore rules match, introducing first from Willow Lake, South Dakota, weighing in at one hundred and twenty two pounds and standing at five feet, five inches… WWWIIIIIIILLLLLLLOOOOWWWW!!!!

The house lights rise ultra-bright with the chorus and Willow strides out onto the stage. She puts her hands on her hips and looks out over the crowd, smiling. Willow then breaks into a run for the ring, moving through the sea of fans' arms before sliding headfirst into the ring. She crawls on all fours to the farthest turnbuckle, scaling it and perching up there for a moment before springing upward with her arms poised to accept the fans' adulations. She shouts words of enlightenment at them, and finally hops down, ready to face a challenge.

CL: I’m going to be sick…

JH: Why?

CL: Another fan hugger, we already got Nightmare and him.

CM: Him? Ohhhh Loon?

CL: Say his name once more and I’ll kill you… I swear it on…

JH: LOOOONNNNN!!!

CL: *Smacks*

JH: OWWW!! What I do?

Cult of Personality bursts through the PA and as the drums kick in, Loon makes his way out, with a big smile. He jumps into the air as red pyros go BOOM! and he runs down the wooden catwalk and over the ropes and into the ring.

MA: And her opponent, from Milan, Illinois, weighing in at one hundred and ninety five pounds and standing at 6 feet… LLLLLOOOOOOOONNNNNN!!!!! TTTWWOO PPPPOOOUUUNNNNNTTTT FFFFFIIVAAAHHHHH!!!!

He climbs up on the upper-right turnbuckle and raises his hands as the crowd roars. He goes to the opposite turnbuckle and does the same, to the same cheap pop. He then hops down, loosens his neck, and turns to the stage.

CL: Hope he breaks something… like his neck…

CM: Conse you know you love him… your obsess…

CL: Don’t even say it!

JH: As these two squabble, the match is underway…

Willow and Loon indeed come out of there corners as Fuzz calls for the bell, it sounds and Loon and Willow circle the ring, Willow looking really ready to go for it, Willow extends her hand shaking Loons and they then back off continuing to circle the ring. Willow and Loon then meet for a tie-up, both equaling each others strength until Loon drops down to his knees, going for a leg sweep, but Willow jumps over his feet, he then goes for a high roundhouse kick, Willow dodges this one as well as she worms under and then kips up onto his feet. Loon snaps up onto his feet too as the pair just watch each other, looking for that chance to attack, Loon again goes for a kick this time dummies though as Willow goes to dodge, Loon shifts his weight and hit’s a dropkick to her lower knee, she drops to a knee as Loon lands on his feet and springs up.

CL: It’s like a damn circus in there.

JH: Its cruiserweight action at it’s best.

CL: So flying monkeys is cruiserweights? I quit.

CM: Least it entertains the morons in the crowd.

Loon then picks her up and scoops slam her into the canvas, he then moves towards the apron, climbing out then turning back towards the ring to face Willow. He then leaps up, bounces off the to rope and looks for a leg drop, crashing down over Willow who clutches her throat as Loon then sits back up, looking to the fans who cheer, he then climbs out the ring, rummaging under the ring. Finally pulling out from under the ring, he comes out with a trash can and throws it into the ring, he then moves onto the apron but is caught as Willow runs to the ropes, springboards off and hit’s a dropkick sending Loon into the ring barricade.

CM: Monkey Kick!

CL: Just smack him with a fork and cut him already!

JH: You really need to be that violent?

CL: Yes.

Willow then stands by the ropes, looking out towards Loon who slowly gets to his feet after his run-in with the ring barricade. Loon stands up and turns and as he does gets meet as Willow leaps up into the ropes, she turns sits down and uses the ring ropes momentum to flip her over with a moonsault crashing down onto Loon.

JH: Beautifully executed.

CL: No, just fucking hit him with a chair or summit you Monkey!

Willow holds her stomach but she land son her feet, leaning against the ring barricade, she then moves to the time keeps table and moves everyone out the way asking them of course, she then climbs onto the table, watching as Loon climbs to his feet and moves towards her direction. She leaps towards him, but he adjusts his body, luckily she sees it coming and front rolls back onto her feet, turning to get waffled in the face by a chair Loon has just thrown at her, she reels back into the ring barricade holding her nose as Loon drops to a knee, gaining his breath and energy.

CM: BAM! She ain’t no FIW cover girl no more.

CL: She never was… she looks like a horse’s ass.

JH: Ay guys come on, that had to hurt, desperation move by Loon.

CL: Everything he does is desperation.

Loon then moves over towards Willow, giving her a kick to the back of her leg, she buckles but not dropping down, Loon then throws her into the ring, he climbs in after her and stands up, but going for a cover…

[align=center]ONE…

…TWO…

…NO SHOULDER UP!
[/align]

…Fuzz says two to Loon who stands up, just shrugging as he grabs the trash can, he then places it over Willow, he points to the ropes and then runs to them, leaping up looking for the early corkscrew lionsault, but all he meets is trash can as Willow moves out the way and Loon holds his stomach from the impact.

CM: You’d think he’d realize he never hits that move.

CL: Crash and burn though, always funny to watch him mess up.

JH: Willow has the advantage now.

Willow slides out the ring, she slides two steel chairs into the ring and a kendo stick, sliding it in the ring and then climbing in herself, she grabs the kendo stick and turns but to her shock, Loon is up and thumps her in the gut with a elbow, he then snaps her into the ropes, coming back she ducks his punch attempt then she springboards off with a back elbow but Loon catches her mid-air and DRIVES her into the canvas with a Russian leg sweep, the impact taking them both down. As both stay down Fuzz checks on the pair, slowly both begin to stir and climb to there feet, Loon gets up next to the kendo stick and grabs it as both turn to face each other…

CM: Don’t just look at her! Hit her!

CL: My god the man’s a idiot, probably thinks it’s his struddle… ITS NOT THAT BIG LOON!

JH: Loon’s just got a conscience, not like others…

CL: I have a conscience, I felt bad when I changed the channel off this big titted momma last night, see…

JH: It’s not the same.

Loon then shouts “ARGH!!!” and starts swinging the kendo stick like a crazy homeless guy looking for dinner in a supermarket, Willow dodges with a array of flips, ducks and even a very impressive splits, Look himself looks warn out as he thinks how the hell she avoid all this shit. He swings it again though this time she drops to her ass, kicking him in the gut with her right foot and with her left, kicking him right in the center of the head, Loon drops the kendo stick and reels backwards, she kips back up and moves towards him but he sees it coming and drives a knee into her guy, whipping her into the ropes, she comes back and Loon flapjacks her, she hooks his head, but he sees it coming holding his strength and landing her on her feet, he then with all his power northern light suplexes her releasing mid suplex landing her right on the chair!

CL:

JH: Northern Lights Suplex!

CL: Loon… suplex? I died and went to hell haven’t I?

CM: Your sitting next to me, all heaven baby!

Willow is down and she looks in quite some discomfort, Loon sits himself up, quite proud of the suplex he just hit on her, he stands himself up looking at the weapons in the ring, he moves the chair into the center of the ring and picks up Willow, he then grabs her in a inverted chancery, he then attempts to sing over but Willow moves herself away as Loon stalls too, she then runs at him but he just moves pushing her to the ropes, as she comes racing back Loon lifts her in a flapjack…

CL: Idiot, set her up why don’t you!

JH: He might block it…

CM: OUCH! Nope his head just got killed.

CL: Damn, she didn’t kill him.

…Willow indeed hooks Loon’s head swings down and with all the power in the world she can muster DRIVES!!!!! Him back down into a sick as fuck DDT right onto the chair on the canvas, his head spikes off it and he rolls over looking out cold, Willow then scrambles on top to cover Loon…

[align=center]ONE…

…TWO…

…THREE!
[/align]

… Fuzz stands up, lifting Willow’s arm as she climbs to her feet smile across her face…

MA: Your winner at a time of six minutes and thirty two seconds… WWWWWIIIILLLLLLOOOOOWWWW!!!!

…Willow smiles and taps Loon’s chest, before she makes her leave from the ring, Fuzz checks on Loon who climbs to his feet as the camera cuts.[/QUOTE]

[align=center]--GIRLFRIEND PROBLEMS--[/align]
Johnny Moon, best friend of 'The Highland Warrior' Willie McPhee, is sat in his usual chair at the Traveller's Rest public house in Stranraer - Scotland. Two pints of beer have been placed in front of Johnny and he takes a sip of one. Johnny then swaps the drinks around and starts drinking the other. The pub door opens and FIW's Scottish representative Willie McPhee himself enters...carrying a bunch of flowers? He looks over at the barmaid.

Willie: Pint cheers Norma.

Johnny: Got you one.

McPhee sits down opposite his friend, puts the flowers down on the table and frowns at his pint before picking it up.

Johnny: Aw, you bought flowers for me mate.

Willie: They're fur Kate.

Johnny: That's very generous.

Willie: Nae at all, it were a fresh grave.

Johnny shakes his head as Willie grins.

Johnny: So what's happening? You must have called me down here for a reason...

An elderly lady walks past them.

Johnny: ...apart from the attractive women of course.

McPhee now has a very stern look on his face.

Willie: It's serioos man.

Johnny: Is it testicular cancer? Men of our age get it all the time, all you have to do is go down to your doctor and they can catch it early.

'The Highland Warrior' is confused and tries to stop Johnny but John is off one one.

Willie: Wha'...nae!

Johnny: I won't take no for an answer Will! Go see your doctor right now!

Johnny picks up his jacket and tries to stand up but Willie grabs him, he yanks John back down into his chair.

Willie: WHOA! Ah huvnae got testicular cancer aw reit!

A relieved Johnny pats his chest.

Johnny: That's good news.

Willie: It's much worse than 'at!

Johnny looks startled, scenario's flash through his brain at a fast pace...

Johnny: Like what?

Willie: Well, reit...

Johnny: Yeah?

Willie: It's only th' single most devastatin' thin' tae happen in Stranraer.

Johnny: Which is?

Willie: Look, weel it's...

Johnny: OH COME ON!

Willie: Aam composin' myself!

Johnny: I was getting bored!

Willie takes a moment to breathe. He looks Johnny dead in the eyes, which slightly unmoves him.

Willie: Aah cam haem th' other day an' ah noticed 'at Kate's toothbrush was in mah bathroom. But tha' was jist th' first sign.

Johnny looks confused.

Johnny: The first sign of what?

Willie: Har merging.

Willie's eyes are wide as he explains his problem.

Johnny: Big whoop, she moves her toothbrush in. That's not a big deal.

Willie: It didne stop there. Ah get haum lest night tae fin' tha' mah flat, mah castle, mah manly abode...

Johnny: Was it another man?

Willie: As if! Nah lass has ever ur will ever cheat oan me!

Willie is offended by the very notion.

Johnny: So...?

Willie: Mah entire flat, it was...pink! It was like bein' stoock inside a care bear! She's gane way tay fur athwart th' line oan thes one.

Johnny struggles to hide his smile.

Willie: She got aw the stuff frae Oxfam. They must hae ha' a sale on fur utter crap.

Johnny: Hang on, there's not much wrong with the feminine touch.

Willie: Th' feminine tooch is cleanin' th' sink, buying groceries an' th' occasional hand-job. Thes is a feminine headlock! It's loch bein' tauld you're gonna die but mair pink!

McPhee appears devastated by the pinkness. Johnny looks down at the flowers on the table.

Johnny: So what are the flowers for?

Willie: Fur when I dump 'er, lit 'er doon easy loch.

Johnny shakes his head as Willie picks up his pint and downs half of it.

Johnny: She won't go.

Willie: Wha nae? It's mah flat!

Johnny: By the sounds of it, she's moved in now. She's connected with the place. What did you call it? Merge. She's merged with the place.

McPhee folds his arms across his chest. Johnny starts drinking his pint, it's been sat untouched for too long.

Willie: I'll jist move flats then, git a new one aff the cooncil. I'll say thes one's infested.

Johnny: What with?

Willie: Mah girlfriend. They'll understand. Then they'll pit me in their protection programme ay somethin'.

Johnny: You're not being stalked! Besides, the council don't like you after you complained about all those flowers outside your house.

Willie: Yeah weel Ah didne know there'd bin a crash.

Johnny: Anyway, you can't ask the council to move you if you're only problem is your girlfriend.

Willie: Wa not? They moved that Jill frae next duir coz ay her laundry!

Johnny: You were stealing her bra's!

Willie smirks and raises his eyebrows suggestively, John frowns.

Willie: But they never foond me out thoct did they?

Johnny: Yeah but it's funny how all the kids from around your end call you "Mr. Perv".

Willie's turn to frown.

Willie: Ah thooght they waur callin' me "Mr. Lurv".

Johnny: Which is actually more worrying. Anyway, if you're not serious about her than she might already be looking elsewhere.

Willie: HA! Nae, ye see once yoo’ve tried the Will-ster loove...nothin' else will ever dae believe me.

McPhee finishes off his pint.

Johnny: 8 minutes of heaven followed by beans on toast. Sometimes I wish I was a woman...Will-ster!

Willie: Doort be sae gay! Anither pint?

Johnny: Go on then.

Willie stands up and pulls out his wallet from his jeans pocket.

Willie: Whoops, hauld it reit thaur.

Johnny: What now?

Willie: Got tae make mah public service annooncement.

Johnny: Not this again!

Willie: Aye, thes again. Listen up FIW! Willie McPhee haur! As suin as mah knee's healed then aam coming to yer coontry to create mair than a splash! Aam takin' yer lasses, yer cigars, yer beer an' yer titles! There's naethin' ye can dae abit it, jist fly th' Scottish flag an' bee proud!

Willie ends the segment with a slap on Johnny's back, almost knocking John to the floor and then he heads off to the bar.

[align=center]**COMMERCIAL BREAK**[/align]
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ReVolt’s production crew fades us into a dimly lit and gray shaded parking lot. A small box in the bottom corner reads “Recorded earlier today”. A red blur zooms into the parking lot and within seconds the little red sports car has made its way across the parking lot to stop abruptly in a parking spot just across from the crew. The smell of burning rubber slowly rises in the air as the car’s engine gets one more rev before dying out completely. Hesitantly the camera man walks a bit closer to the car and zooms in on it and, as if on cue, the doors on both sides open.

Popping out from the passenger side of the car is a familiar head with black hair we all know as JJ. Poor JJ looks visibly shaken as he steps onto the safe, solid pavement. Ignoring his desire to kiss the safe ground he now stands upon, he glances over the roof of the car. A second later a blonde head pops up from the driver's side.


Kailey: So? What did you think of my baby? She handles like a dream, doesn't she?

Kailey rubs her hand over the roof of her new BMW Roaster and then leans her head on the metal as if giving the automobile a hug. JJ rolls his eyes and forces a weak smile on his face and then makes a poor attempt at an honest chuckle.

JJ: Eh heh, it was an... interesting experience. Hey! Pop the trunk and I'll get the bags.

The southern belle blinks and walks towards the trunk after she shuts the driver’s door.

Kailey: You don’t have to do that.

JJ: Don’t worry about it. You let me ride along to the show, it's least I can do.

Kailey nods in agreement and dangles the keys up in the air, hitting the trunk button as she does.

Kailey: Did you know that they didn't "pop" trunks in '69. They did it the old-fashioned way. With the key! Ah well, now that the Camaro has antique plates, I can't drive her to these locations anymore. They have a mileage restriction on them.

The young man isn't listening to her ramblings as he pushes up the trunk’s top farther and starts fishing into it, pulling out bags. Idly, Lane strolls past the car, stopping just a few steps away from the trunk, making sure she doesn’t get too far ahead of JJ. As she stuffs her hands into her pants' pockets, her eyes look over JJ up and down.

Kailey: So what’s with the sharpness tonight, JJ?

He stops fishing for the bags when she asks the question, turning to look at her with a quite clueless expression.

JJ: Huh?

Kailey motions to the all black outfit JJ is wearing, from his black buttoned up jacket over a black turtle neck, to the pair of black khaki pants and black boots. JJ's gaze slowly looks down at his own attire.

JJ: Oh!

He looks back up with a grin which doesn't necessarily help Kailey's concern over the particular way he said that, "Oh!".

JJ: Well, since I don’t have a match tonight, and since we hang out a fair amount of time as is, I figured I’d be an honorary personal body guard for you tonight. So I wore this to look the part, I mean, after all, the big guy isn’t going to be around tonight and you need some one watching your back.

Kailey's expression hides more than it shows though it is obvious that there is some thing on her mind regarding that, but she doesn’t say it. Instead, her smile beams.

Kailey: Ah, I see. Well, ready to go?

JJ nods and leans back, shutting the trunk lid before he scoops up their bags and the two start to head towards the entrance.

JJ: So, yeah, don’t worry, with special agent JJ by your side, no one is messing with you!

His look of determination suddenly shifts to uncertainty and he blinks a few times as he looks downward.

JJ: Uh…Well, besides that crazy Japanese woman, but I’m sure you can take her!

Kailey smirks.

Kailey: Yeah, no need to worry about that one, JJ. I think she might be off balance, or merely has her facts wrong, or both. I mean, she has been saying things about me that are so off the mark, I am not sure she will even realize I am her opponent tonight. She'll be standing there waiting for some blonde, big-busted bimbo with blood and tats and chains through her nose ... *laughs* and instead, she'll get just lil ol' me. Now won't that be a disappointment for her.

Her smirk looks a bit more playful as she turns to face JJ and pats him on the shoulder.

Kailey: Much like the dissappointment she will have when the match is over and she goes home a loser. So, no, don’t worry at about lil ol' me, I don’t think my big strong body guard will need to step in with that one.

The two of them share a chuckle as they near the entrance to the backstage area, the camera cutting else where…

CM: Damn...

JH: What?

CM: Look, next on the card...

CL: I noticed too, Chip.

JH: Oh come on, the match will be interesting, interesting to see if he can overcome the odds.

CL: Yeah, the odds of being a loser.

JH: Exactly.... Wait, He's not a loser yet!

CL: I wasn't talking about the match...

[align=center]Posted Image VS. Posted ImagePosted Image[/align]

MA: Ladies & Gentlemen, the following match is a Handicap Match, scheduled for ONE FALL! Introducing first...

The guitars of “Alive And Kicking” blast over the PA system as the crowd stir and stare toward the stage…

[align=center]I'm Stronger Now Even After Everything That You Did
Still Alive And Kicking
I'm Better Now, I'm Awake
Now I Can See, Everything In Front Of Me (Now)
[/align]
…The crowd roar as Elrick appears on the entrance stage, he raises his arms. Elrick then walks towards the ring, he high fives some fans hands as they cheer and some rock out to “Alive And Kicking” stopping half way he points up towards the rafters signaling respect for his father.

MA: ... weighing in at TWO-HUNDRED and SIXTY-EIGHT pounds, hailing from LEAMINGTON SPA, ENGLAND! He is... ELLLLLLLRICK!

He gets to the ring and climbs up to the apron, turning back to the fans where he shouts some sort of quote, getting the fans buzzing. He then climbs in the ring and awaits the match to get underway.

JH: Elrick looks to be focused on his goal tonight.

CM: Being focused, and actually achieving that goal are two VERY different things.

CL: Chip makes a great point, Jonathan, YOU can focus as much as you want on being a ladies man, doesn't make YOU one...

JH: Well, I think I do pretty well when it comes to women.

CM: Then it looks like Elrick isn't the only one lying to himself tonight.

MA: And his opponents for the night, introducing first...

The lights go dim as "Headstrong" by Trapt begins to play throughout the arena, red strobe lights then begin to flash, rotate, and light up the stage and gold pyro begins to shower down to the left and right of The Dragon as he appears on stage. With his head down and standing there for a few second, he then looks up and begins to confidently walk his way down to the ring.

MA: ... weighing in tonight at TWO-HUNDRED and FIFTY pounds, hailing from HOUSTON, TEXAS! He is... THEEEEEE DRAAAAAAAAAAGON!

As The Dragon makes his way to the ring he pauses in front of the stairs and looks out into the crowd before running up the stairs and into the ring. The Dragon then makes his way to the left turnbuckle, climbs up it, and lifts both arms in the air and flexes his chest and arm muscles as he pauses for a few seconds and then climbs back down in anticipation of the beginning of the match.

JH: Dragon has a chance to wipe the memory of last week from the fans mind by picking up a victory tonight.

CM: Wipe the memory? What memory? They don't remember it, they don't remember HIM! I certainly didn't.

CL: While I can't say I'm a fan of Dragon... I think he might be the lesser of two evils tonight *Grumbles something about Elrick*

CM: Well you can have fun watching these two tear each other apart, I might just take a nap.

MA: ...and introducing his partner for the night...

The lights around the arena cut violently to Black. The opening riff of “Before I'm Dead” starts up through the speakers, followed by the words;

[align=center] moon hangs round
a blade over my head
reminds me
what to do before I'm dead
night consumes light
and all I dread
reminds me what to do before I'm dead

Sun reclines
tease my mind
reminds me what to leave behind
light eats night
and all I never said
reminds me what to do before I'm...

To see you
to touch you
to see you
to touch you
[/align]

An explosion goes off around the outskirts of the stage as the beat kicks in; purple and pink strobe lighting pulsing throughout the arena, mist quickly fills the stage as Panther crawls out. When she is in the center she slowly gets up and almost instantly she begins to dance wildly shaking her hips she moves further down the ramp.

MA: ... weighing in at ONE-HUNDRED and TWENTY-FIVE pounds, hailing from BOSTON MASSACHUSETTS! She is... PAAAANTHERRRRRR!

The lusty calls of the men in the audience can just be made out over the music, she begins to run her hands over her body, running her hands through her long thick brown hair, when she reaches the ring she grabs hold of the ropes with one hand the other continues to run through her hair. Her eyes hold mischief her lips curled in a smile flipping over the top rope she continues her seductive dance in the middle of the ring until her music fades out and awaits the start of the match.

CM: She really does know how to bring a mans attention back from the endless land of boredom.

JH: Chip...

CM: Yes?

JH: Your drooling.

CM: Jonathan...

JH: What?

CM: Your annoying.

CL: You two fight like children. Maybe they should set up one of those kiddie bounces for you two or duke it out.

Meanwhile, in the ring. Dragon & Panther converse in their corner over who will start out against Elrick. On the other side of the ring, Elrick impatiently awaits their decision. He waits, and waits, and waits some more. That is, until he's tired of waiting and just charges, he runs right into the back of Dragon, driving him into Panther who is, in turn, nearly crushed against the turnbuckle. Panther drops to the mat as Elrick bashes Dragon's face off of the turnbuckle. And with that... the Bell is rang to officially start the match.


[align=center]Ding! Ding![/align]


CM: Cheap Shot!

JH: Elrick got tired of waiting, and did something about it. Smart move on his part to make the first move in a match like this.

CL: Elrick, Smart, same sentence? Just doesn't sound right.

Truth tries to get Panther up off of the mat, so he can get her out of the ring as Elrick continues his assault on Dragon. Elrick drives his forearm into the face of Dragon, and again, as he pushes him back against the ropes. Elrick grabs the arm of Dragon and pulls, sending Dragon across the ring, or so he thought, Dragon reverses. Sending Elrick running to the ropes on the other side of the ring. Elrick returns and Dragon is waiting, but he's taken off of his feet by a running clothesline from Elrick.

JH: Panther finally to the apron after taking that crushing blow.

Dragon shows his quickness as he shoots back to his feet, he catches Elrick off guard with quick left jab to the gut, but Elrick has no time to cover up before he catches another quick jab to the gut, this time coming from Dragon's right. Elrick grabs his stomach but is rocked backwards with a sick elbow to the ear. Dragon closes in and continues his attack with a knee to the gut before hooking the head and taking Elrick over with a suplex.

JH: Dragon might just be too quick for Elrick.

CM: Or Elrick's just to slow, take your pick.

Dragon pulls Elrick off of the mat and pulls him behind him as he heads for his corner. Dragon wrenches the arm of Elrick before reaching over to tag Panther into the match, Panther springboards over the ropes and drops a double axehandle on the shoulder of Elrick, dropping him to the mat.

JH: Dragon & Panther showing some signs of teamwork with that.

CM: Yippie! The exotic dancer is in, things are about to get interesting.

CL: Elrick's in a tough spot now, he stands a chance of being pinned by a female.

Elrick slowly starts to get up as Panther hits the ropes, charging at Elrick who is now to his feet, she leaps forward with a spinning wheel kick, but not today, Elrick catches her in the air and slams her hard to the mat. Elrick drags her off of the mat and like Dragon did before, he hooks the head and takes her over with a suplex, she hits the mat hard once again. She grabs at her back. Elrick covers though...


[align=center]... ONE! ...

...

... Kick Out! ...
[/align]


CM: Elrick should have know that she wouldn't go down that easy... or will she?

JH: Actually it's smart on Elrick's part to try and steal the victory before they have a chance to wear him down.

CL: Would have been great, would have put an end to this horrible match, and brought us one step closer to something actually entertaining.

Elrick doesn't waste time arguing with the ref over a measly one count. Instead, he raises from the mat, bringing Panther with him. Once up, Elrick shoots Panther into the corner, and he goes charging after her. He looks to crush her in a similar fashion as he did to get this match kicked off, only this time is different. Panther gets both her feet into the air right as Elrick is set to crush her, Elrick takes it to the face and stumbles backwards. Panther quickly hops onto the Turnbuckle and comes flying off with a Cross Body before Elrick can even see straight again. Elrick goes down, Panther on top of him, she remains there for the cover...


[align=center]... ONE! ...

...

... TWO! ...

...

... KICK OUT! ...
[/align]


JH: Not enough to keep him down to for the three, but if Elrick doesn't do something fast, the end is surely near.

CM: I wish I was Elrick right then, having chicks all over you is nice.

CL: I don't think I would want to be Elrick at any point, even if I was given $1,000,000.

Panther raises from the mat, pulling Elrick up with her. She shoots Elrick off to the ropes, as he returns, she leaps and takes him down with a Lou Thesz Press and hammers away on Elrick. She hits him a good 5 times before climbing from atop him. She picks him back up, only to drive him back to the mat with a Hurricanrana.

JH: Panther showing her speed advantage here.

CM: She could Hurricanrana me any time, I wouldn't care.

CL: I think I should teach Sybil that move.

Panther pulls him back up, but he knees her in the gut and he drives Panther into the mat with a DDT. He gets back to his feet, bringing her with him. He lifts her up onto his shoulder and charges froward, driving her into the mat with a Running Power Slam. Though he's not quick to his feet, maybe feeling a little winded? Panther crawls toward her corner, inching closer and closer before with what might be her last burst of energy, she leaps forward and gets the tag off to Dragon. Dragon comes into the ring on a beeline for Elrick.

JH: Fresh man's in.

Dragon charges at Elrick and takes him down with a shoulder block. He peels Elrick off of the mat and drives him back down with a spine buster. Elrick grabs his back in response to the impact. Dragon stomps on the ribs of Elrick as Elrick tries his best to fend of the blows. Dragon pulls Elrick off of the mat again, only to be drive to the mat himself by Elrick with a knee followed by a scoop slam.

CL: This match has flip-flopped back and forth more then a fish outta water.

Elrick stands over the downed Dragon, he bends down to pull Dragon from the mat, only he is surprised as Dragon quickly turns over, grabbing the leg of Elrick and tripping him up, causing him to fall to the mat. With ankle still in hand, Dragon raises from the mat, only to drive the knee of Elrick violently into the mat, causing Elrick to scream out in pain. Dragon's not done yet though, he sits down on the back of Elrick, pulling the leg back as Elrick continues to feel pain in the knee.


JH: Dragon found a weak spot on Elrick and is now trying to pick it apart.

CM: You gotta remember, that leg fell victim to an injury that caused Elrick to retire, could he be forced back into retirement on his first official match back here in the FIW?

CL: It's possible, while Dragon doesn't show the mastery that someone like Kurt Angle does, he is still very effective when it comes to Submissions.

You can see the pain that Elrick is feeling, it's plastered on his face as Truth is right there in case he wants to throw in the towel. Elrick just might... but then he notices that he's not far from the ropes. He struggles to crawl on the mat to reach the ropes, but finds it a hard task with Dragon fighting him for every inch. Elrick gets closer, and closer before he finally has the strength to get them last couple inches. He gets the ropes and Dragon lets go.

JH: Elrick showing that he's not ready to hand this one over just yet.

CM: Why must he torment me?

Dragon grabs the back of Elrick's head and directs him off of the mat. But Elrick fights back as he pushes Dragon's arms away and throws a left, connecting with Dragon's chin and rocking him back. Elrick with a Right, Left, Right, Dragon stumbles backwards. Elrick kicks him in the gut but Dragon fires back with a wild right, Elrick ducks under and lifts Dragon onto his shoulders...

JH: He's going for Career Suicide!

CM: I might go for SUICIDE too!

CL: I might join you... I can't sit by and watch Elrick win this.

Elrick gets him high up, but somethings wrong... Elrick grabs his knee as Dragon falls backwards, Elrick drops to the mat also, grabbing at his knee. Dragon hits hard.

JH: While Elrick couldn't execute it fully, I think Dragon still felt the full effects.

CM: But look at Elrick, rolling around, grabbing at his knee... HIS NIGHTS DONE!

CL: Hopefully his CAREER, once and for all!

JH: Hopefully it's not THAT serious, after all, he did just get his knee driven into the mat, and then a man trying to pull it out of place. Not many wouldn't feel some pain from that.

While Elrick deals with the pain, Dragon begins crawling towards his corner to get Panther back into the ring. Elrick slowly begins to make it to his feet, just as Dragon slowly inches closer to his partner. There's the tag! Elrick's Up! Panther comes flying into the ring and charges at Elrick, but Elrick takes her down with a punch, Dragon's back up and charges at Elrick and suffers the same fate. Panther tries again, only to be arm dragged over to the mat. Elrick turns to find Dragon charging again and he's backed to the ropes. Elrick drops the shoulder and dumps Dragon over the ropes...

JH: Elrick's coming back!

Elrick turns again to find Panther getting to her feet, he goes over too her and grabs her, but she knees him in the gut. She shoots him to the ropes, but he reverses! Panther hits the ropes just as Dragon tries to get back into the ring to help her. Dragon falls, catching his chin on the apron as he hits the floor. Panther stumbles forward and Elrick lifts her up into a Fall Away Slam, he swings her...

JH: CAREER-FRIGGIN'-KILLER!

Elrick drives her into the mat and covers!


[align=center]... ONE! ...

...

... TWO! ...

...

... THREE!
[/align]


JH: ELRICK'S DONE IT, OVERCAME THE ODDS!

CM: Damnit...

CL: Yeah, but look... he's grabbing his knee again!

Elrick stands up, releasing his knee as Truth raises his arm in victory.

MA: Here is your winner... EEEEEEEEEEEELRICK!

The camera cuts backstage just in time to view a locker room door burst open and in storms Smarty Smark, his face showing a mixture of annoyance and anger. Slowly it zooms out to reveal that we are inside Extreme Ninja #2’s locker room as the silent Ninja looks up from taping his hands. Smarty Smark zips across the room’s floor and doesn’t stop until he is right in front of Extreme Ninja #2, Paper Bag Man slowly entering the door way.

Smarty Smark folds his arms over his ample bosom and glares down at his client through his glasses, casually EN #2 tilts his head upwards, seemingly just blinking behind his mask. A grumble escapes the Manager of the Superstars’ lips as a vein is throbbing on his forehead, PBM making his way past the door way so the locker room door closes behind him. Without warning a smack echoes out through the some what empty locker room as Smarty slaps Ninja right across the face. Calmly the reigning FIW Cruiserweight Champion of the World turns his head back straight so he can look at Smarty again.


Smarty Smark: Where the hell have you been?! What the hell was with that stunt you pulled at the hospital?! Who the hell do you think you are, James Ninja Bond #2 now with that escape?!

Ninja lowers his head and returns to taping his hands, which only further enrages the chubby man standing in front of him, Paper Bag Man quickly walks over and tries to save the day.

PBM: I’m sure he had a good reason for what he did sir, perha-

Smarty Smark: Naw huh! I don’t want to hear it noob! I want to hear it from this brat’s mouth!

The would be referee looks back up again at Smarty and tilts his head to the side as Smarty sneers at him.

Smarty Smark: Oh, what, had a lot to say before, now suddenly the cat has your tongue again?! Huh?! Do you know how much money you wasted of mine by not using your time more wisely, by going off like some loose cannon, do you?! So tell me, oh great warrior, why the fuck did you run off?!

Ninja goes to reach for his sign and marker but suddenly Smarty lifts up his shoe and plants it across Ninja’s shoulder, pinning Extreme Ninja #2 against the couch he is sitting on.

Smarty Smark: Are you retarded or just slow as a lagging computer?! I didn’t say write it on your cute little board with your sweet little marker, I said say it! Now say it damn it! Speak!

Despite Smarty’s order Extreme Ninja #2 just sits there, his masked head staring up at his manager as his body retracts in pain from the shoe digging into his shoulder. His beady eyes behind the glasses shoot downward as the camera follows them and notices what he just noticed, that Ninja’s pinned arm’s hand is still slowly crawling towards the sign and marker. A growl flows out from Smarty’s mouth and he applies more pressure on his make shift hold, causing Ninja’s body to tremble.

PBM: Sir, perhaps we should wait to do this after his match with Ghost, yes? I mean, after all, he is already pretty badly banged up; least we want is for us to be the cause of him failing against her. After he’s done what you want of him, then we can question him about where he’s been.

A scoff pops out of Smarty Smark’s mouth and he takes his shoe off of Ninja’s shoulder and stands up straight. His eyes glare down at Extreme Ninja #2 like daggers for a few more moments before he storms out of the locker room. Paper Bag Man looks over at Ninja and Ninja looks over at him, PBM sighs lightly and follows after Smarty as the camera cuts else where…

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[align=center]Posted Image VS. Posted Image[/align]

Suddenly the lights cut out entirely, plunging the arena into darkness, it doesn’t take long for a few very dark blue lights to start shining, drenching the fans and the ring in blue. Fog starts pouring out near the entrance way, shrouding it is mist, before long the entire arena is nearly engulfed in it. Within the fog seven very small figures walk out from behind the curtain and hurry down the steps, forming a line facing the ring near it, a spot light from above the HDTV shines down on them, in the same dark blue tint. It reveals these seven small figures to be in fact seven midgets dressed exactly like Extreme Ninja #2 except for the fact they are all wearing a strap around their neck that is connected to a bongo drum resting in front of them. Without much warning all seven little men start beating their bongo drums to a beat as the dark blue lights flash green and red, and purple and then back to blue as a voice booms over the speakers.

JH: What the bloody hell is this?

CM: MIDGETS! Awesome.

[align=center]The champ is here
The champ is here
The champ is here
The champ is here
The Evil Genius

The champ is here
Aha
The champ is here
Yeah D-Block Mother Fuckers
The champ is here
Kiss what ma niggas
The champ is here[/align]


”The Champ in Here” by Jadakiss starts playing as the lil’ Ninjas continue to play their bongo drums along with the beat of the bongo drums in the song. Behind these seven little Extreme Ninjas dark blue pyro rains down from the HDTV, and suddenly two explosions on each side of the entrance way go off, forming a X with their dark blue pyro. From behind the pyro out steps Smarty Smark, grinning from ear to ear as the fans greet him with jeers due to this over the top entrance and song. He slowly turns around and points to the curtain as yet another dark blue X of pyro explodes and the curtain is whipped back.

JH: This whole entrance probably cost more then Ninja’s wages.

CM: For the year.

[align=center]Fuckin wit the champion
You already know
J-A-D-A
Kiss the game goodbye
You fuckin wit the champion
You already know
[/align]

Extreme Ninja #2 walks out from behind the curtain, with Paper Bag Man rubbing his shoulders as he jogs behind Ninja, to quite the mixed reaction from the crowd, some loving the Ninja, and some hating Smarty. Ninja is wearing his standard in-ring and entrance gear however over his robe he is sporting around his waist the FIW World Cruiserweight Championship. Smarty continues to applaud him as they walk down the steps and then EN #2 looks around at the mini-EN #2s, he lifts up his sign dramatically and it reads “The Champ is here~!”

JH: The champ is indeed here. The one true Flyweight champion here on FIW.

CL: Not anymore Bitchen, the Cruiserweight championship don’t mean shit ‘round these parts anymore.

[align=center]Niggas know the champ is in here
He took it from crack to rap, now he put out two anthems a year
And I just wanna rock for a century
And then chase the book wit the documentary
If you cant do nothing other than flow
Life's a bitch like the mother from blow, lets go
Don't make me put your heart on your lap
Fuck ridin’ a beat nigga, I parallel park on a track
Hop out looking crispy, fresh and new
In a six but it's a BM and its Pepsi blue
And I don't know you
But I know a man becomes a man from all the shit that he go through
Y'all ain't fuckin wit Jason
After I cash in there's really no justification
Of how I'm gone change tha game
So don't get outta line cause this little nine will change your frame
Mother fucka, aha


The champ is here
The champ is here
The champ is here
The champ is here
[/align]

CL: Ok, he’s arrived, we see him. Can we please get to the fucking match now?

CM: ZzZzZzZzZz

CL: …Is he asleep?

JH: I believe he is.

Paper Bag Man continues to rub Extreme Ninja #2’s shoulders as the duo jog along the entrance way, past the seven little Extreme Ninjas playing their bongo drums, Smarty Smark clapping and praising Ninja. EN #2 flicks his hooded head from side to side a bit like he was a boxer as PBM and him make their way towards the ring, another series of dark blue pyro explosions goes off behind Extreme Ninja #2, PBM and Smarty Smark.

[align=center]Y'all never gon touch the kid
kiss of death
They gon have to get me at the top
Y'all never gon touch the kid
gangsta kiss
No love this time nigga, kiss of death
Yo I ain't got time to be up here lyin to you
Just make sure y'all niggas feel what we tryin to do
If I fuck up then it's on me
Besides that it is what it is and that's what it just gon be
Blowin my purple, wish you would go in my circle
If you know my record is clean, you know I'ma merk you
I live like a warrior do
without screamin true story, niggas know my story is true
The cribs, the cars, the jury, the spots I got
The money that pass my hand and the rocks I chop
The ammo, the artillery, the knifes I bought
Waking up sore the next day from fights I fought
In the hood cuz I fuck wit the thugz
Tryin to figure out, why the money never added up to the love
Gun in my waist, dutch in my hand
And I don't do a lot of talkin, I listen as much as I can

The champ is here
Aha
The champ is here
Yea
The champ is here
That’s right
The champ is here[/align]


CM: ZzZzZz -- *snort* Wha--!? What happened? Is the match over yet?

JH: The entrances aren’t even over yet.

Ninja slides into the ring as PBM holds the middle rope down for Smarty to enter it as well, PBM staying on the apron and watching the two. Smarty walks over and points to the near by turnbuckle, Extreme Ninja #2 hops up onto it and undoes his championship belt, grabbing it in his right hand and lifting it up in the air. Majority of the fans jeer the holy hell out of him while the group of fans in the front row dressed up like him hold up their signs which reads “Hail the Champ!” and bow to him. EN #2 hops off of the turnbuckle and Smarty Smark snatches the cruiserweight title, with a grin he races over to the ropes and stands up on the bottom rope, triumphantly lifting the cruiserweight gold over his head to a series of jeers as dark blue pyro explodes from all four turnbuckles and dark blue glitter rains from the rafters of the arena. The lights go up and Ninja flicks back his robe’s hood, revealing his mask fully, he casually undoes his robe’s tie as Smarty exits the ring with the title belt, allowing his client to get ready for the match ahead.

MA: Ladies and gentlemen, the following non title match is scheduled for ONE FALL, and will be conducted under HARDCORE RULES! Introducing first, from Detroit, Michigan and weighing in at 180lbs, he is the FIW CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIOOOOOON, EXTREME NINJA NUMBER TWOOOOOOOOO!!!

[align=center]“Bitch is hardcore.”[/align]

Gregg Henry’s accurate observation from the movie “Slither” leads us directly into the guitar heavy opening of Alice Cooper’s classic, “Poison”. Purple strobes search the dimmed arena for their muse as the song begins to build, only for it to plateau as Alice half sings, half speaks,

[align=center]“Your cruel, device
Your blood, like ice
One look, could kill
My pain, your thrill”
[/align]


CL: Man I’ve been waiting for this shit since Dangerous Liaisons. Ghost’s first ever match in FIW. This is history right here.

JH: I never thought I’d see the day.

By this point the crowd is in full jeer mode, though a contingent of NGIW lifers fight through them with a steady chorus of cheers for their favourite Hellcat as the strobes pick out her form on the stage. The lights come up with the chorus and she smirks at the fans displeasure, her V Flycore title freshly polished and resting on her pale shoulder, her ever present girlfriend at her side already taking offence to the verbal onslaught.

CM: So, they’re just friends right? I mean, good friends. Right?

CL: If by good friends you mean hot lesbo lovers, then yes, they are.

CM: Awesome.

[align=center]“I wanna to love you but I better not touch
(Don't touch)
I wanna hold you but my senses tell me to stop
Wanna kiss you but I want it too much
(Too much)
I wanna taste you but your lips are venomous poisoooon!
You're poison running through my veins
You're poisoooon
And I don't wanna break these chains
Poisoooon!”
[/align]


The pair descend the small clump of steps and make their way toward the ring, Ghost a sauntering vision of focus, Ed flipping the bird and mouthing off to the ringside fans. She quickly jogs ahead of her lover and hops onto the apron where she sits on the middle rope and raises the top, allowing Ghost to duck through and enter the ring. Ed follows as the champion moves to ring centre and surveys the arena, a rougish smile still twisting her lips as she absorbs the jeers and cheers with impunity.

MA: And his opponent, from Essex, England, weighing in at 130lbs, GHO--

Anderson finds himself cut off as Ed leans out through the ropes and yells something at him. He moves closer to the apron and nods as she barks something inaudible at him.

JH: What’s going on here?

MA: My apologies, introducing the FIRST, THE ONLY AND THE UNDEFEATED V FLYCORE CHAMPIOOOOOOOOOON, GHOOOOOOOOST!!!

JH: On come on.

CL: Hey, baldy better get it right next time or he’ll have a chair wrapped round his braincase.

She hands her beloved Flycore title belt off to Ed, receives a good luck kiss in return and moves to her corner as her girl drops down to a not-so-neutral position at ringside.

CM: Getting pretty crowded out there.

Logan Black ensures all the ringside participants are just that, ring side, and then turns his attention to the two champions in the ring. He talks the talk, informing them of the rules, or lack thereof in this case, and shoos them back into their own corners.

JH: Neither title is on the line here tonight, but this match will be fought under hardcore rules.

CL: Advantage Ghost.

JH: I wouldn’t rule out the Ninja, he’s pretty extreme himself.

CL: My hairy balls he is. That bitch standing across from him? That’s extreme. He’s a disgrace to Ninja-kind.

Logan calls up the bell…

DING, DING

And we’re off. Both champions edge forward and begin the traditional circling of the ring as their companions cheer them on from ringside.

JH: Of course in this kind of environment, whatever Smarty or PTB decide to do to interject is all legal.

CL: They’ll have to get through Ed to do it though. Frankly I don’t fancy their chances.

Ed shoots Smarty and the Paper Bag Man an icy glare as her girl circles their ninja. They creep toward each other and Ghost raises her hands for a test of strength, and the Extreme one seems cautious to comply. He gingerly offers his hands to his opponent and the two champions interlock their fingers…and Ghost raises a BOOT into his CROTCH!

JH: Well, her first more here in FIW is a kick to the balls.

CM: Start as you mean to go on.

Their hands break from each other as Ninja’s shoot to his groin and Ghost’s wrap themselves around his head. She forces him down and raises a STIFF knee into his face, snapping him backwards and staggering him into the ropes! She follows him in with a smirk on her face as she FIRES a right hand across his mask face and picks up his arm in order for her whip him across the ring. He crashes into the opposite set of cables and is thrown back out, right into MOONSAULT DROPKICK to the face! Ninja his thrown back first onto the canvas and Smarty is fuming!

CL: Ghost is pwning his ninja ass!

JH: thanks to a normally illegal move at the opening of the match.

CM: Ain’t illegal tonight.

JH: Maybe not, but it’s hardly a fair move.

CL: Shut the fuck up Hitchen.

Ghost wastes no time moving in on the Cruiserweight champion and picking him off the canvas. She pulls him to his feet, but he fights back! He swings a few rights and lefts that knock the Hellcat back and give him enough room to breath, before CRACKING a side kick right into her gut! Ghost stumbles back toward the ropes and the Ninja shakes the cobwebs from his dome before SPINNING into a beautiful ROUNDHOUSE that CRACKS off Ghost’s jaw and bounces her off the ropes. He takes her by the hand and whips her diagonally into one of the far corners, where she CRASHES into the turnbuckle back first.

JH: Extreme Ninja, the TRUE Flyweight champion here in FIW, has taken control.

CL: Flyweight schmiweight, no one gives a crap about some pansy ass title when you got the Flycore belt overshadowing it.

Ninja charges into the corner and leaps up onto Ghost’s thighs, wrapping his hands around the back of her head before leaning back and flipping her over with a MONKEY FLIP -- BUT THEY KEEP ROLLING! Ghost clamps herself onto the Ninja and they roll across the ring until she’s pinning the Cruiser champ to the canvas!

CM: No one makes a monkey out of Ghost.

JH & CL:

CM: …shut up.

From her mounted position, Ghost SLAMS a right hand into Ninja’s face and begins to pummel on his fancy mask! He throws his forearms up to try and block the blows as he desperately searches for an opening.

Meanwhile, Logan’s attention is drawn to the apron as Smarty Smark tries to interject himself into the proceedings, but the referee does his best to keep the fat man out.

JH: It may be hardcore rules, but that doesn’t mean it can turn into a handicap match.

CM: Tell that to the dude with the bag over his head.

Paper Bag Man slips in behind the ref’s back and grabs himself a handful of Ghost’s hair, and TEARS her off the Ninja! She falls back, kicking and yelling as the PBM ducks back out under the bottom rope and dusts his hands, his job done. Smarty too relents and drops back to ringside, a smug smile on his face as his boy rolls to the ropes to recover.

CM: Man I love these guys, they’re so organised.

JH: Perhaps, but they seem to have forgotten one variable.

CM: Oh? And what might that be?

CL: ED!

Paper Bag man turns away from the ring, a satisfied smile drawn on his face, and he finds Ghost‘s lover Ed standing before him. She cocks her head to the side, eyebrow raised as she looks the recyclable headed man up and down…AND THEN PUNCHES HIM SQUARE IN THE NOSE!

JH: Oh my.

CL: HA!

PBM staggers backwards, checking his, er, bag for blood, and Ed marches forth with her arms out screaming “You want some, bitch?”. If he had the time he’d erase the smiley face and replace it with an angry one, but he doesn’t, so he just charges in and looks to floor her with a Lariat, but Ed ducks and pops up behind him. She glances around and darts over to Timmy, shoving him from his chair and scooping it up before turning back to PBM and waving it menacingly at him. His second charge is halted in it’s tracks as he lays his permanent marker eyes on the steel, and he slowly backs off.

JH: Well, as both parties retire to their sides of the ring, I think we should get back to the match at hand.

CM: You only want to ’cos Ninja has the upper hand.

We cut back inside the ropes to see Ninja gliding through the air, his outstretched leg connecting Ghost’s face and sending her SMACKING into the canvas! He moves round and grabs her by the head, and peels her off the canvas, but she fights back! She pushes him off and fires a STIFF chop across his chest that reels him momentarily and gets the crowd going!

[align=center]“WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!”[/align]

Ninja regains his composure and comes back with a chop of his own!

[align=center]“WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!”[/align]

Ghost is staggered backwards, but comes back with plenty of momentum for another blistering chop!

[align=center]“WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!”[/align]

Ninja is rattled, but once again FIRES a knife edge across her humble chest!

[align=center]“WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!”[/align]

Ghost is getting pissed now as her chest stings, and comes back with another of her own!

[align=center]“WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!”[/align]

Ninja stumbles back toward the ropes and takes a quick glance around. Outside the ring he spots Ed, mouthing off at Smarty and PBM and threatening them with a chair, which the Extreme Ninja PLUCKS from her hands! He spins round as Ghost charges in and SMACKS HER IN THE TEMPLE WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!!

CM: Finally, some chair violence!

CL: Aye, the chopping thing was getting lame.

Ed stands there, mouth agape as her girl collapses to the floor. Ninja places the chair over her gut before darting off toward the corner and running up the turnbuckle. Once at the top he turns, points to Ghost’s lifeless form and LEAPS OFF, DRIVING BOTH HIS FEET INTO THE CHAIR, INTO GHOST’S GUT!!!

JH: TWO FOOTED STOMP WITH THE CHAIR!!

CM: Ghost is well and truly winded!

CL: Pfft, she’s taken bigger moves then that.

Ninja goes for the pin!

[align=center]One!

Two!

Kickout!
[/align]

CL: See?

Ghost throws a shoulder up and Smarty curses under his breath, but Ninja is not so deterred. He takes to his feet and peels the chair off his opponent before turning and dashing toward the ropes. He leaps up, lands on the second one, chair still in hand and -- gets caught by Ed! She’s up on the apron and she’s wrapped her arms around his neck as she tries to drop him throat first across the top rope, but he’s fighting back!

JH: Ninja was looking for a moonsault with the chair maybe? But Ed sin’t about to let that happen to her girl.

CM: It’s kinda sweet really.

Ninja struggles back and forth from his precarious position on the middle rope, but help is at hand as Paper Bag Man wraps his arms around Ed’s waist and yanks her off the apron! She fires wild elbows back at him and eventually frees herself from his grasp and pushes him away before dusting herself down. She shoots him a glare and flips him the bird.

CM: She doesn’t like to be MAN-handled. Get it?

CL: Very humorous.

CM: ‘Cos she’s gay.

JH: We get it.

His move interrupted, Ninja stumbles off the second rope and turns back to his prey, only to find her up and spinning her boot toward his face! He raises his hands to block, but uncountable for him he happens to have a steel chair in his hands, and Ghost NAILS it back into his face with a SPINNING WHEEL KICK!! Ninja drops to the canvas and Ghost takes a moment to suck some air back into her lungs and cradle her ribs.

JH: EN’s chair stomp may have busted a rib or two.

She pushes the pain aside and grabs the chair off Ninja, and sets it up across the ring. She then returns for the Cruiserweight champion whom she drags back to his feet, but he fights back! He throws a flailing fist toward her face but Ghost dodges it and STICKS a STIFF knee up into his ribs, quietening him enough for her to shoot him into the ropes. She moves into position, and as he returns she slips in a Drop Toe Hold and DROPS HIM FACE FIRST INTO THE CHAIR!!

CL: WHITE OUT!!

JH: Shame you can’t see him bleeding, huh?

CL: Aww man, stupid mask.

Ghost rolls his limp body over and hooks up his leg!

[align=center]One!

Two!!

Kickout!!
[/align]

Ed kicks the ring steps in frustration as the Ninja kicks out, and Ghost kneels up and glares down at the body before her. She takes to her feet and repositions the chair before going back for the Ninja. She drags him to his feet and slaps him around a little as she positions him just right, and then quickly runs to the corner. She scales the ‘buckles, turns round as she finds the top and comes flying off, PLANTING NINJA’S HEAD INTO THE STEEL WITH A JUMPING DEE DEE TEE!!

CL: LEAP OF NO PARTICULAR FAITH!! TO THE CHAIR!!

The chair is completely flattened beneath Ninja’s head as Ghost pushes him over and hooks the leg! But Logan’s over by the ropes trying to get Smarty off the apron!

CL: This one would be over by now if it wasn’t for that fat fuck!

Ghost looks up and glares at the fatso. She takes to her feet and moves over to the ropes, but she pauses as she sees Ed charging along the apron and SPEARING into Smarty! But her slight figure is no match for Smarty’s girth as she ricocheted off his flubber and lands on her arse beside the ring! The Ninja’s manager laughs his ass off as Ed sits there grumbling and rubbing her aching bum, but Ghost fails to see the finny side. Smarty spins round just in time to avoid a crumpled steel chair being SWUNG at his head! He drops to the safety of ringside as Ghost glares a hole through him and eventually turns back into the ring, before getting SPEARED OUT OF IT BY NINJA!!

CM: HOLY CRAP! Ninja just sprang back to life and SPEARED them both through the ropes!

JH: See? He’s a touch little sod. That’s Extreme for ya.

CL: You’re kidding right? They’re on the outside, the home of hardcore. Ghost’ll slaughter him out there.

Ninja pushes himself out of the tangled heap he made out of himself and Ghost and, with a little help from Smarty, retakes his feet. He swats his manager away and shakes some sense back into his noggin, before reaching down and repositioning the chair across Ghost’s body, and then heading off in search of his sign and scribbling something on it. He then climbs back onto the apron, moves along so that he’s hovering over Ghost and holds up his sign that reads…

JH: “DANGEROUS~~!!”

Ninja leaps off with a SHOOTING STAR PRESS RIGHT ONTO GHOST AND THE STEEL CHAIR!!

JH: You can’t tell me that’s not EXTREME!!!

Ninja flops to the side, holding his gut as Ghost rolls over and does likewise, both party’s managers looking on with utter shock and disbelief at the carnage at ringside.

CM: Wow, this is nuts, and there aren’t even any titles on the line.

CL: There’s pride, Chip. Ghost made a lot of bold statements going into this match, and the Ninja has to prove them all wrong just as much as she has to prove them right.

Ninja rolls over onto his front and slowly begins to push himself back to his feet. He falters, but reaches out and steadies himself on the audience barricade, resting there for a minute or two as he tries to catch his breath.

JH: If he can get Ghost back in the ring he can win this one.

CL: Not so fast their Hitch.

As Ninja rests, Ghost begins to stir and shoots an arm out for the apron.

JH: She is resilient.

CL: No shit.

Ghost begins to drag herself up, but the Ninja notices her progress and peels himself off the barricades. He crosses over to the ring and SMASHES a Double Axe Handle right to Ghost’s spine! And the Flycore Champion arches her back in pain. She turns to face her attacker and FIRES a back hand Chop across his face that sees him staggering backwards, but the Ninja recovers enough to throw himself forward for a Laria -- NO! Ghost ducks the arm, but Ninja spins round and catches her into a backdrop, and DROPS HER BACK FIRST ONTO THE CHAIR!!

JH: EXTREEEEEME!!!

CL: Oh shut up Hitchen.

Ninja gets back to his feet and drags Ghost with him. He takes her by the scruff of her neck and the waist of her dress and slides her under the bottom rope and back into the ring. He retrieves the chair from the ground before sliding back in after her and hopping back to his feet. Across the ring, Ghost is slowly pushing her way up to all fours, but she only gets as far as a knee when Ninja charges across the ring with his chair raised -- But Ed is on the apron! She tosses a white chair into the ring and Ghost catches it just in time to raise it against Ninja’s!

CL: Ghost’s trademark white chair! Oh it’s on now!

The chairs CLASH together as both champions battle for supremacy. Ghost pushes all her weight behind her trademark ashen steel as she forces Ninja back and pulls herself to her feet. Once there, she musters up enough strength to push him away, and the Ninja staggers backwards, but comes back swinging! As does Ghost! And once again both their chairs CRASH in the middle like a pair of swords! Ghost stumbles back, but comes in swinging again -- only Ninja ducks! Ghost swivels round and The Extreme one leaps into the air with a DROPKICK and DRIVES HER CHAIR BACK INTO HER OWN FACE!!

CL: NOOO!!!

Ghost CRASHES into the canvas, her chair sliding from her grasp as Ninja regains his footing. The Flycore champ shakes away the pain and drags herself over onto her front where she begins pushing herself upwards. Ninja quickly darts to his corner, grabs a pen and scribbles something on his chair and raises it up to read “I STEP ON YOU!”, before dashing back across the ring, bouncing off the ropes behind Ghost and stepping off her back. He manoeuvres the chair over her head and STOMPS IT INTO HER CRANIUM!!

JH: I STEP ON YOU WITH A FREAKIN’ CHAIR!!!

Ghost flops to the canvas and Ninja covers!

[align=center]One!

Two!!

THREE!!!
[/align]

JH: The Cruiserweight champion wins!

CL: Crap.

MA: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner, EXTREME NINJA NUMBER TWOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

“The Champ is Here” reverberates through the speakers as Smarty and The PBM slide into the ring to congratulate their man. They haul his exhausted carcass up and Smarty celebrates as if he did all the work himself.

JH: Now who’s extreme?

CL: He got lucky, trust me. When it counts Ghost will bury him.

Ed reaches in and drags her girl out of the ring. She props her against the apron and slaps the life back into her before helping her back up the aisle. Smarty of course can’t help but mouth off which in turn raises the ire of the Flycore champ, who through groggy eyes glares back at the Ninja and his representatives.

CM: Well I’m sure this story isn’t over yet folks.

CL: It ain’t over till the scrawny Ninja bleeds.

Cutting immediately backstage Extreme Ninja #2 is seen walking down a corridor; his title belt slung over one shoulder while his robe is slung over the other. After a few moments of walking he finally makes it to the locker room area and walks directly towards his locker room. He stops in front of it and pushes open the door and goes to walk in, but immediately stops dead in his tracks. The camera crew quickly run over and whip behind him to catch a view of what stopped him.

Standing inside his locker room is a man that looks of relative same height and weight, and build as Extreme Ninja #2. He is also in fact wearing similar attire to Extreme Ninja #2 aside from the fact that his attire has a different color than blue on it. This man suddenly notices the camera’s and Extreme Ninja #2’s presence and turns around. Happily he holds up his note pad and it reads…


Extreme Ninja #3’s Notepad Reads: Surprise! I thought I’d come and pay you a visit!

The camera stays on the moment for a few more seconds as Extreme Ninja #2 continues to stand there stun before cutting away…

[align=center]**COMMERCIAL BREAK**[/align]

The camera cuts backstage to show Kailey Lane, already in her in-ring gear, walking down a corridor with a soda in her hand. She turns the corner and heads into the locker room area as the camera crew follows her. Up ahead, the image of JJ standing in front of one of the doors becomes more and more clear. He is standing at attention, hands behind his back and a stern look on his face. As Kailey nears her locker room door, she tries to conceal a smile at JJ’s efforts to be a guard.

JJ: No one has entered the room, Miss Lane.

His dramatic tone of voice and subsequent salute has Kailey on the verge of laughing at the silliness of it all, but she holds it in and returns his salute.

Kailey: Alright…good to hear soldier.

JJ steps aside and opens the locker room door for her, letting her in, and Kailey gladly walks past him and on into the room. As soon as JJ shuts the door behind her Kailey can’t hold back anymore. The giggles overtaker her and bubbly laughter rains by the buckets full. After wiping away a tear, she sets the soda can down and walks over to the small bay of lockers in her room.

Kailey: That guy is some thing else…

The southern belle is still chuckling to herself as she reaches out to the locker in which she put her things and raises the latch. Her hand flies back as pressure behind the door thrusts it open and Onikage springs out!

Kailey jumps back a few feet in surprise, her heart racing.


Onikage?: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ho, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Kailey blinks a few times as her mind registers what she is seeing. Her pulse begins to slow as she realizes that this is not Onikage. No, what is sticking out of the locker appears to be a very large Jack in the Box, still bouncing on its springs. The mechanical laughter continues as Kailey takes in a relieved breath. After glancing around her surroundings to ensure there aren't any other unwanted visitors, she cautiously walks back toward the colorful contraption, aggravated annoyance now plastered on her features.

As she scrutinizes the large version of a child's toy, she sees that the "Jack" is really a Jester which has a mask that is a near replica of Onikage’s leather bound mask over its face. In place of a mouth, there is a flower, its curved and thorny stem creating the illusion of a grin.

Reaching out, she gingerly plucks the flower from its resting place. This flower is most certainly a white rose, just like a certain someone used to give to her, but this one... this one is dead and is withering.

The irritating laughter from the oversized toy seems to mock her.


Kailey: Oh, shut up!

She snaps at the Onikage-masked jester and shoves it back into the locker, slamming the door shut. Lane eyes the dead rose as she twirls it in her hand, just now noticing that there is a tiny card attached to the top of the steam just below the discolored bloom. Kailey flips the card over and reads the fine print. Luckily, the camera gets a shot of it for the home viewers as well.

[align=center][The Card’s Content]

Good luck tonight Miss Lane; perhaps if we are both victorious in our respected matches, we could have a celebration afterwards, I'll bring the nonalcoholic sake.

Love, Your Enigma
Onikage[/align]

A hiss seeps out from between Kailey’s teeth and she balls her fist, crushing the tiny card within it.

Kailey: Over my dead body...

Glaring, she chucks the rose across the room. As it hits the wall with an almost inaudible thud, Kailey looks again toward the locker door, and it is there we leave her, since another match is about to begin so the camera cuts back to ringside.

JH: OK, for those folk with children watching at home… now would be a good time to send them to bed early.

CM: Why’s that? Are we going to see boobies?!?

JH: Uh… if the combatants’ promos are anything to go by, then no.

CM: Rats!

However it’s at this time that the tunes of Marilyn Manson’s “Personal Jesus” hits on the PA system…

CL: Oh, God… not him… anyone but him…

The tunes of “Personal Jesus” by Marilyn Manson sends the crowd into a frenzy of jeers as it pumps out the PA system before the man himself, the Hardcore Jesus walks threw the curtains…

CM: Yay, it’s Toan!

JH: Jesus…

CM: Not exactly, but very close.

He walks towards the announcing enclosure next to the entrance way stopping only at seemingly random intervals to get in the face of a mouthy fan and create yet more slander suits for FIW before turning his verbal assault towards the announcers which fails to get picked up by the sound guys…

JH: Oh, I’m not repeating what he just said… I can lip-read.

CM: What? What’d he say?

CL: He said that…

Toan then practically ripping open the door to the enclosure that wasn’t locked, oddly enough, before taking a steel chair and placing it next to the unsuspecting Conse chatting with Chip at the desk.

Toan then proceeds to take a spare commentator headset on the desk and place them over his head…

CL: …until it turns purple and starts getting all filled with puss and stuff so you have to get a doctor to inject you with Morphine to be able to remove it without you dying from the pain.

Conse then turns around to come face-to-face with the Crimson King himself

CL: Argh!! Lucifer!!

Toan: Not quite…

CL: What in the name of Shiva’s portion are you doing here??

Toan: Hey… nobody tells me what to do when my protégé is having a match. I’m here to watch what she has learned from me.

JH: OK, fine… just don’t cause any trouble here and we’ll get along just nicely.

Toan: Fine by me. *muffled* Cock-sucker…

At this time Michael Anderson takes centre stage with his house microphone and Richard Kelly enters the ring, standing in a neutral corner.

[align=center]Posted Image VS. Momoko Wakari[/align]

MA: Ladies and gentlemen… are you ready for more action?!?

The crowd give a roar of approval as the ear-splitting tunes of “Dead In Hollywood” by Murderdolls pound out the PA system as lights around the arena behind to strobe like out of a rave club…

JH: What the hell is this?

Toan: Music, Hitchen.

CM: Yeah!

Toan: What’s the matter, you forget people come out to music in wrestling?

CM: Yeah, you idiot! You forgot people come out to music!

Toan: Stop kissing my ass, Chip. I don’t like you.

CM: … *slight whimper*

Momoko appears from behind the curtain with her Stop Sign in one hand and a sickle and staple gun attached to each other by a chain on each of the handles before raising the Stop Sign in the air for the admiration of the fans and yelling what we can assume is an insult in her native language to the fans in attendance and saunters down the ramp way towards the ring…

CL: Does anyone actually understand what she just called the fans?

CM: Well, if my Japanese is correct… “baka” means stupid and “ochinchi” is… some kind of spaceship…

Toan: *sighs in disgust*

Momoko upon reaching the ring places her sickle, staple gun and Stop Sign in her corner before climbing into the ring and to the middle rope of her corner’s turnbuckle.

She then stares out callously to the masses in attendance and flips the bird to everyone in her immediate area before hopping back down and awaiting the match to start.

JH: I hope Momoko knows that this is going to be a standard wrestling contest… she’ll not be allowed to use any of those instruments she’s brought to the ring.

Toan: Knowing her reputation, she probably will.

CL: Yippie!

JH: Agh…

"Defy You" by Offspring begins to play and Kailey strides toward the ring, waving to the fans and acknowledging those with signs and banners with a thumbs up. When she reaches the ring, she slides in between the middle and top ropes then waves to the crowd as she moves to her corner.

CL: Well, that was a quick entrance…

JH: What’s your problem now?

CL: Nothing. It’s much better than Nonce-mare having three and a half pages just so he can get into the ring.


[align=center]TWACK!![/align]


CL: Ow! What the hell was that for??

Toan: We have a thing called kayfabe here, Conse… don’t break it or I’ll stab you in the eye with a Q-Tip.

CL: You’ve got a Q-Tip?

Toan picks up a said Q-Tip pen off the desk

Toan: I have now.

After the arguments with the commentators settle down Michael Anderson brings the house microphone up to his mouth as both combatants stand anxiously in their respective corners.

MA: The following contest is a women’s exhibition match scheduled for one fall… your referee is the ever popular Richard Kelly.

Right on cue, a few “Kelly” chants break out with a few cheers for the popular referee who modestly smiles and raises his hand thankfully…

MA: In the red corner… she hails from Saitama, Japan and weighs in at one hundred and twenty-five pounds… please give a big American welcome to… MOH-MOH-KOH WAAH-KAA-RI!!!

Momoko raises her hands to a small round of jeers from the San Jose natives, not overly familiar with the former NGIW Hellcat but know enough to dislike her… which she responds by getting on the middle ropes and shouting at the fans for not throwing streamers at her.

JH: That’s a whole lot of bad attitude in that little body of hers.

Toan: Exactly the reason I brought her here.

MA: And in the blue corner… she hails from Nashville, Tennessee and weighs in at on hundred and forty pounds… please give it up for… KAI-LEEEEE LANNNNNNAHHH!!!

Kailey walks forwards with her arms raised getting a big round of applause for the long-time FIW competitor and former Cruiserweight Champion.

Michael Anderson exits the ring as Momoko comes out of her corner pointing at… Kailey. She’s pointing down at her boots, shouting at Richard Kelly to do something about them.

JH: What’s that Momoko I saying?

CM: She’s saying she stole her boots from Hot Topic.

Toan: *laughs* With the prices I hear they have for jeans there, I wouldn’t be surprised if she had to steal them.

CL: Yeah, it’s like… $60 for a pair of regular baggy jeans.

RK looks befuddled at Momoko’s ranting before coming in to ask what the problem is… Momoko continues pointing at Kailey’s boots imitating a bludgeoning weapon of sorts.

JH: She wants RK to search Kailey for foreign objects? Sort of ironic that Momoko would be worried that Kailey would use an underhanded tactic like that, isn’t it?

RK looks over at Kailey before turning back to Momoko and asking her to remain in her corner whilst she searches Kailey… Momoko nods in affirmation as he walks over to Kailey Lane to start the search for foreign objects.

CM: How I envy Richard Kelly right now… lucky bastard!

RK first checks the wrist and arm taping of both arms for any unusual bulges in it…

CL: Right, what exactly does Richard expect to find in wrist taping?

Toan: Razorblades, a thumbtack perhaps… better be safe than sorry.

RK then kneels down to check the waistline for any objects before checking the sides of Kailey boots… Kailey then looks up and takes a straight resounding slap across the face by Momoko Wakari!!

Momoko then bails out of the ring on the opposite side of the ring to a torrent of jeers as Kailey attempts to retaliate for the cheap shot but stops at the ring ropes as Momoko looks prepared to strike the moment she exits the ring.

JH: Momoko headed for higher, well… lower ground after that cheap shot she hit Kailey with.

CL: Chicken.

Toan: *patronisingly* Excuse me, Conse?

CL: Err… I was… just sending a text to the chef to get me a sandwich.

Kailey shouts at Momoko to get in the ring as Momoko looks around ringside violently apprehensive at the fans angry reactions… Richard Kelly pats on Kailey’s shoulder in an attempt to tell her to let Momoko back in but Kailey responds by turning to him of Momoko’s un-sportsman-like conduct.

Momoko takes this opportunity to climb up on the apron and apply a headlock on Kailey though Richard Kelly immediately admonishes Momoko for being in the ropes as well as her arm being around the throat of Kailey Lane before starting the five-count.

CL: Oh, come on! The Strangle Hold can’t be illegal here…

JH: Who trained her? Doesn’t she know anything other than questionably tactics?

Toan: That’s a good question… why don’t you ask her that yourself?

At the same time that RK scolds the psychotic pink-haired wrestler, Kailey utilises her Jeet Kun Do knowledge to throw Momoko over the ropes and into the ring… but Momoko still retains the choke which slips inadvertently into a side headlock on the ground.

Kailey quickly gets to her feet with Momoko, still in the side headlock before moving towards the ropes to push Momoko off her head… Momoko comes charging back with a shoulder block but Kailey, being significantly heavier than her, doesn’t budge an inch.

Momoko gets a full head of steam off the ropes, coming in with a clothesline but gets taken over with a conventional Arm Drag into an Armbar by Kailey Lane.

Richard Kelly immediately asks Momoko if she wishes to submit but gets a firm “no” in response.

JH: Well, whoever trained Momoko it would appear she is already in a predicament which may result in the end of this match already… a simply Armbar hold.

CL: Yeah! Stretch that arm ou- *realises Toan is glaring at him* Uh… let her go, you fucking… fuck… Kailey!

Momoko struggles to get to her feet, winching in pain from the Armlock before trying to push Kailey back to the ropes but is unable to shift her due to the weight advantage Kailey has and not to mention a lack of muscle tone on Momoko’s part.

Instead, Momoko chooses to pull on Kailey’s blonde locks dragging her back to the ropes but RK catches her in the act as she reaches the ropes and starts the five count to force a break… however Momoko, being an evil bitch, won’t give a clean break and gets a forearm smash to the face for her troubles.

Momoko whips Kailey across the ring but Kailey twists into a wristlock and sends Momoko in the same direction…

Momoko returns to get caught in a waistlock by Kailey Lane who ducks down into a double leg trip sending her pink-haired Japanese opponent down on her stomach, nearly bashing her nose on the canvas before jumping up so her feet are under Momoko’s armpits and turns her over before bridging back into a pinning predicament!


[align=center]One!

Two and a kickout!
[/align]


JH: Momoko, evidently is getting totally out-classed thus far by Kailey Lane.

CM: Oh, that was a beautiful bridge. I only wish that damn cameraman had got a better shot.

CL: What in the name of Yotz are you talking about? You could see the bridge perfectly from where the cameraman was.

CM: Yeah, but…

JH: Don’t get him started, please!

Momoko rolls to the ropes after the brief moment of her shoulders touching the mat, looking evidently surprised at Kailey’s speed… Kailey looks ready for more as Momoko gets to her feet, wary of her opponent’s skill advantage.

Momoko sizes Kailey up as she circles around her… Momoko and Kailey clash in the collar and elbow tie-up before Momoko grabs a hold of Kailey’s left arm in a standing key lock in preparation for a wristlock… though as soon as Momoko cinches in a loose wristlock does Kailey escape by a roll threw, kip up and reversal into one of her own.

CL: Ugh… not the flippy shit again…

JH: Nevertheless… Kailey Lane reversed the wristlock by Momoko Wakari. A move I’m surprised that Momoko actually knew how to apply.

Toan: Keep talking… I’m sharpening…

Momoko yells out in pain as Kailey forces her wrist to be bent in a direction not intended by Mother Nature. Momoko tests and pushes both arms Kailey has applying the hold on before taking an unconventional approach and stomping down on Kailey’s left foot to distract her enough to grasp an arm around the top-rope.

Looking to save FACE *nudge, nudge… wink, wink* Kailey breaks the hold and backs off, letting Momoko shake off the effects of the fundamental hold, a frustrated glance on the psychotic Asian wrestler’s face.

JH; It’s not even been two minutes into this match and it’s been all Kailey so far.

Momoko circles around, pondering in her head what to do before stopping and raising her right hand up for the Greco Roman knuckle lock… Kailey immediately takes the offer and clasps her knuckles along with Momoko’s.

Momoko and Kailey grasp their other free hand before testing the strength of each other… which Kailey gets the advantage over.

Momoko grits her teeth, yelling curse words threw them as RK asks for a submission and gets presumably a swear word in Japanese thrown at him.

Momoko pushes Kailey’s arms apart before coming in with a vicous headbutt to Kailey’s temple!

Crowd: Oooh!!

CM: Ouch!

JH; Brutal headbutt by Momoko!

So Kailey responds with a headbutt of her own that rocks Momoko!!

Crowd: Oooohh!!

CL: Fully fuckin’ sick!!

Momoko returns the favour with one of her own, Kailey with another one! Momoko! Kailey! Kailey then begins to repeatedly headbutt Momoko in the cranium getting a small “Holy Shit!” chant going up in a small portion of the crowd.

Toan: That’s shades of Chris Benoit and Steve Regal, right there.

Momoko, out of desperation, spats Kailey dead in the eye before pulling her hands down to the canvas and hitting a Double Foot Stomp with all her weight onto the hands of the former Cruiserweight Champion!!

Toan: And… shades of Mayumi Ozaki now.

JH: Momoko has no respect for Kailey whatsoever.

Kailey tries to wipe the spittle out of her eyes but her hands are still stinging from the brutal double stomp by Momoko who then applies the side headlock on her again before laying in with illegal closed fists to the temple region with her back to Richard Kelly who scrambles to get a better view but is too late to see what damage has been caused by Momoko as Kailey crumples to the mat writhing in agony at Momoko’s assault on her person.

Richard motions if it was a closed fist, Momoko claims it was an opened fist.

JH: That sneaky… I’m not even going to say it.

Toan: Call her what you will… she’s got the advantage, now she’s just got to keep it and sustain the pressure on Kailey.

Momoko drags Kailey back to her feet before hitting another forearm smash sending Kailey into a corner turnbuckle… Momoko then applies a blatant chokehold with her right hand, leaning into Kailey for added leverage as Kailey struggles to not be suffocated and Richard Kelly once again admonishes Momoko for breaking the rules, again.

However, as Richard Kelly starts the five-count does Momoko prop up her left boot before pulling out of it a small silvery object out of the viewpoint of Richard Kelly.

JH: What is that?

CL: Cutlery, genius.

CM: Well, Momoko did say she’d cut her mark in FIW using Kailey.

Toan: Always expect her to mean it literally when she says something like that.

Momoko releases the chokehold on Kailey, hiding the foreign object behind her back as Richard Kelly firmly warns her about the chokehold before asking her to let Kailey get out of the corner… Momoko doesn’t oblige and turns her back to RK, applies a headlock and stabs the object in the face of Kailey Lane who reacts with an agonised scream before being thrown to the canvas.

Momoko backs up, keeping the foreign object out of view of Richard Kelly though the camera picks it up… it’s a small fork.

JH: Jesus, someone tell Richard she’s armed!

Toan: Why the fuck should I tell someone about that? She’s my protégé, you daft bastard.

Kailey clutches at the area affected by the fork as she attempts to crawl to her feet as Richard Kelly asks if she wishes to forfeit, Momoko circling around behind him switching the fork into her right hand.

Kailey gets onto one knee before Momoko strikes again with the headlock and gouges the fork into her forehead, Kailey yelling out in pain as the fork pierces her flesh.

JH: Oh, that is just disgusting!

CL: BLOOD!!! YES!!! HA-HA!!! I LOVE YOU, MOMOKO!!!

Toan: …weren’t you married last time I saw you?

Momoko, keeping her eye on the referee, stops gouging and walks off almost non-chalantly as Richard Kelly surveys the situation as Kailey clutches at her forehead which now has a small tickle of blood flowing down her face.

RK passes a suspicious glance at Momoko who, still keeping the fork out of his view, turns around with that same crazed glance she always has.

RK then takes the initiative and orders an impromptu search for weapons from Momoko…

JH: Momoko hasn’t fooled Richard Kelly with that. He’s not an idiot.

Momoko backs up into a corner, this fork still behind her back, as he protests her case to Richard Kelly that she doesn’t have any weapons on her… but RK seems persistent to search her.

Momoko looks around at the fans baying for her to get disqualified… but then nods her head to agree for the search.

Momoko turns her back to Richard Kelly, still keeping the fork out of view, and places it discreetly by the handle end in her mouth before raising her arms up. Kelly searches her hands and elbow pads before searching her waistline, kneepads and boots for weapons but comes up dry.

Kelly shakes his hands signally she has no weapons on her as Momoko takes the fork out of her mouth with her right hand and whilst RK is distracted informing the other officials takes a shot with the fork to the already lacerated head of Kailey Lane.

JH: Of all the… dirty, low-life, weaselling tactics I’ve ever seen. That definitely ranks up as one of the worst I’ve ever seen.

Momoko places the fork back in her boot before RK turns back to officiate the match before picking the bloodied Kailey Lane to her feet and applies a front facelock before driving her down with a Jumping DDT.

Momoko floats over into a cover, failing to hook the leg… RK gets down for the count…


[align=center]One!

Two!

Kickout!
[/align]


Richard Kelly holds up two fingers however, Momoko protests it was three by slapping her hand three times in quick succession but fails to get anywhere with RK.

Momoko drags Kailey up to get feet by the hair, much to RK’s disapproval before Irish whipping her across the ring… but it gets reversed suddenly! Momoko comes back to get lifting up and dropped down with an Inverted Atomic Drop!

JH: !!!

CM: O________O

CL: <__<

Toan: Stop with all the goddamn Anime emoticons!

Momoko clutched at… the downstairs department as Kailey gets a head of steam off the ropes and comes roaring in with a clothesline but gets taken down by Momoko with a surprise drop toehold.

Momoko then gets back up and laying in with some heavy stomping on the back of Kailey’s bloodied head before violently grabbing her by the hair and beating her head repeatedly into the mat as RK warns Momoko about grabbing the hair and starts the five count.


[align=center]One!
Two!
Three!
Four!
[/align]



Momoko then lets go of Kailey hair and gets up in the face of Richard Kelly…

Momoko: I HAVE UNTIL FIVE, DAMMIT!!

RK just looks at her weirdly as Momoko turns to Kailey and drags her up to her feet once again, laying in with a disrespectful slap across the face that sends Kailey reeling to the ropes.

Momoko takes this opportunity to pull Kailey out and throw her throat first into the middle rope before pinning her in the ropes using her leg across her back and pulling them middle rope further up into her larynx.

Richard Kelly issues another caution to Momoko Wakari and starts the five count as Momoko discreetly takes out the fork from her boot out of the viewpoint of Richard Kelly and releases the illegal hold, naturally keeping the fork out of sight and out of mind.

CL: Yes! Momoko is going to fork Kailey again!

CM: Again?!? When did I miss the first time??

JH: Jesus Christ…

Toan: Yeah, what do you want now?

Momoko pounces on Kailey again, turning her back on Richard Kelly to gouge the fork into the open wound of Kailey Lane once again which Kailey is predictably none too happy about as her agonised screams tell.

Momoko lets go as RK starts the five count again and Kailey turns to facing him, the blood flowing more heavily down her face which excites RK’s suspicions again.

Momoko backs into a corner with her right hand concealed from Richard Kelly who approaches her again, ordering another impromptu search… and Momoko is livid.

Momoko shouts furiously at Richard Kelly that she has no weapons as she puts her fork behind her back but her protests won’t budge Kelly’s suspicions who insists on the search.

She then nods in agreement before turning around and placing the fork in her mouth again… but Kelly asks that she face him.

CM: Busted…

Toan: Wait…

Momoko then takes the fork out of her mouth and places it under her armpit before turning back and showing Richard Kelly her hands… he searches the wrist tape before kneeling down and searching the waistline, kneepads and boots before coming up dry once again.

Richard Kelly signals not to ring the bell to which Momoko, once again, uses to land a shot with the fork behind his back must to the crowd’s disapproval.

JH: I don’t believe this…

Momoko drags Kailey up by the hair and into a side headlock before gouging the fork in her head once again as RK turns back to the action.

Kailey slumps to the mat as the blood practically oozes out of the laceration and the crowd start a chant…


[align=center]KAILEY! KAILEY! KAILEY![/align]


Momoko sneers out at them, telling them to shut up repeatedly as the chant starts to become widespread… Momoko reacts furiously by yanking Kailey up by her throat and reaching back with the fork for a strike!

But Kailey grabs a hold of Momoko’s right arm! She then kicks the fork right out of Momoko’s hand before unloading with a stiff forearm from the left side!!

JH: Fight Kailey! Fight it!

Momoko, dazed from the shot, attempts to retaliate but Kailey blocks the blow and hits a forearm from the right side! She blocks another shot and hits from the left! From the right! Left! Right! Left! Right!

Momoko, on rubbery legs, just stands there as Kailey gets a full head of stream off the ropes before nearly taking Momoko’s head off with a Flying Double Axe Handle Smash!!

JH: KAILEY KLUB!!

Kailey with the cover and a hook of the leg!!


[align=center]ONE!!!

TWO!!!

NO!!!
[/align]


Kailey, with crimson staining her face, looks surprised as Momoko rolls to the outside to gain her bearings but Kailey follows her before ramming Momoko’s head straight into the steel ring post with a resounding “clunk” which sends Momoko down on the floors on the outside!

Kailey, not finished with her, picks her back up slowly before we see that Momoko is bleeding from the shot on the steel post and Kailey throws her back in before following her in.

Kailey throws Momoko into the nearest corner turnbuckle before hoisting her up onto the top-turnbuckle… Kailey then climbs up to the middle rope and applies a front facelock on Momoko…

JH: Kailey Lane… possibly looking for a Superplex here.

CL: Suplexes! Awesome!

Kailey attempts to lift Momoko but Momoko holds onto the top-rope… she tries again, same result… Momoko hits a closed fist into the midsection area of Kailey before gradually swapping positions around on the top-rope.

Momoko attempts the Superplex but Kailey doesn’t budge… so Momoko resorts to a headbutt to the face which serves as an adequate measure to stun Kailey enough to hit a unorthodox variation of the Superplex that spikes Kailey near enough on her head!!!

Both women are down!!!


[align=center]HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT![/align]


CL: OMFG!!! SHE DROPPED HER ON HER HEAD!!!11

JH: MOMOKO MAY HAVE DAMN NEAR CRIPPLED KAILEY AND NOT TO MENTION HERSELF WITH THAT MOVE!!!

Richard Kelly looks astonished at the scene before starting the ten count for the knock-out…


[align=center]One…

Two…

Three…

Four…

Five…
[/align]


Both Momoko and Kailey start to move on the canvas…

[align=center]Six…

Seven…
[/align]


Momoko starts to get to her feet with Kailey in hot pursuit…


[align=center]Eight…

Nine…

Te-
[/align]


Both competitors make it to their feet before the ten count! Kailey immediately starts slugging it out with Momoko who is still standing with a glazed over look on her face…

Suddenly, it’s as though the sky opens as somewhere around a million dead rose petals begin raining from the rafters.

CL: What the fuck is this!?

JH: I think I know what this is… it reeks of Onikage!

CM: That bastard! Always ruining everything!

Kailey, already with blood blurring her vision, is surrounded by swirling flower petals, distracted as Momoko desperately stumbles over to her corner where her trusty Stop Sign lays.

Momoko returns to kick Kailey in the stomach, sending her to the ropes where Momoko keeps the Stop Sign in her right hand and uses her free left arm to weakly Irish whip Kailey Lane across the ring… Kailey returns and sees the huge metal clump with “Can’t Stop Momoko” written all over it coming full force over her cranium which lets out an almost echo-like metallic clunk as it bounces off her head, sending her down.

CL: CAN’T STOP MOMOKO!!!

At this time a ring attendant is pouring water in the eyes of Richard Kelly enabling him to see again to which Momoko quickly pushes her Stop Sign out of the ring and hooks the leg!

Richard Kelly, with one eye, starts the count…

[align=center]ONE
[align=center]Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted ImagePosted Image[/align]
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The camera sheds it’s black skin and looms above Maj, Pocco and an empty seat which are sat at a table covered with playing cards and beer cans. Not Fosters. Fosters SUCK. No one from Australia drinks Fosters. Crocodile Dundee was lying to you.

Fozzy: See Pocco, this is how you film. You gotta get the angles and crap. The screen jumps down a peg, levelling itself with table.

The Majesty: Put ‘em down Poc.

Apocalypse: Righto. Read ‘em and weep.

Apocalypse puts down two kings and three queens.

The Majesty: Shat me.

Maj throws down his hand while Pocco grins and drags a bundle of money and empty cans over to his side of the table. As Maj gathers the scrambled cards Fozzy spots a young 20-something man under the doorway of their lockeroom. His cool looking headset and clipboard signal that he must be an intern.

Intern: Are you guys ready to wrestle? You’re up after the next match.

Maj doesn’t once remove his attention from the cards and continues to shuffle.

The Majesty: Whaddya reckon fellas?

Apocalypse: Nup. I’d rather empty Fadge’s bank account

Fozzy: Heh, Fadge and Maj. Good one. I’m writin’ that down.

As Fozzy filters through the table for a pen and pad the intern groans and taps his clipboard against his head as if trying to bang a thought out of his forehead before putting it back down at his side.

Intern: You guys DO know you’re legally obliged to wrestle…Tier’s gonna be proper pissed.

Fozzy: Tier?

The Majesty: Hey, weren’t our contracts sent out by Madison?

Fozzy: Why didn’t ya say so then? I’m no way wrestlin’ for that waxhead. Couldn’t run NeoGI-Joe, can’t run FIW. And he never beat me, so there’s that too.

Intern: Well I’ll pass on the message then.

The intern huffs off back to his boss while Fozz continues to muck about on his hand held camera.

Fozzy – this thing has wicked zoom.

Fade to black…either that or Fozz zoomed into Apocalypse’s hairy nose.

[align=center]**COMMERCIAL BREAK**[/align]

Footage turns to a shot of a locker room, it is rather bland and generic at first nothing gives an clues but as the camera investigates we see a shiny new championship belt hung on the arm of a coach, before the exact details of what belt it is can be made out the camera switches to a more definitive piece of evidence. On the far wall of the locker room is a picture of Xtreme Kitten or at least it seems to be a picture of Xtreme Kitten or what looks to be Kitten standing in the corner of the a ring ready for competition, the build is the same but in the picture Xtreme Kitten has a darker tan and is wearing different style pants.

XK: Oi!

The camera man jumps.

XK: I'm over here.

The camera pans around to see Xtreme Kitten sitting on a steel chair getting into his ring gear; to be more specific he is only just starting as he only has on his mask, blue cotton boxer shorts and a thin black knee pad only pulled half way up his shin, there it goes the knee pad it in place.

XK: You couldn't just put the camera on me you had to give everyone a tour of my locker room? Ah forget I asked, I don't have time for your answer, not that you would answer me, you never do, do you?

Xtreme Kitten turns his head pointing his right ear to the camera, he waits but a moment before nodding and looking to the camera once more.

XK: See exactly what I thought. I didn't organise this time to talk about your social problems, I organised this camera time for a damn good reason. As you may have well seen Lucy had my mouth taped up when I was last on camera while not unusual or unpleasant, I had stuff to say. I wanted to talk about this-

Xtreme Kitten leans forward and picks up two pieces of paper, that are held back to back as Kitten lifts them; he holds the paper up to the camera on it is a picture of Onikage.

XK: This is a slap in my fa-whoops.

Xtreme Kitten glances at the paper and notices there is something on the piece he can see. He turns the the papers around keeping them back to back, on the piece now facing the camera is the ReVolt card with Bloody Awesome Bloody Ocker Return circled in red. Kitten notices the picture of Onikage immediately and pulls it away with his over hand.

XK: This is a slap in my face.

Kitten shakes the ReVolt card.

XK: This is Lucy's idea of a joke.

Kitten shakes the picture of Onikage, he screws it up then tosses past the camera.

XK: Of the wall and into the garbage where he belongs.

Kitten looks at the camera

XK: And I mean he, though the picture was horrible quality too.

Xtreme Kitten leans around and looks at the card then at the camera.

XK: Is it obvious which match is a slap in my face? It's not the main event though the competitors are a joke, there is another match that is a real slap in the face, is it obvious enough for you to see? I hope it is because I aint got no high lighter.

Xtreme Kitten points to the circled match.

XK: This one, the one with the ocker blokes in it, what kind of dodgy booking solution is that? I should get ACA or Today Tonight to take a look into, this is bigger then shonky mechanics over charging or causing damage so that have more work to do. I know Tier wanted to get this dick heads out of the way but at whose expense?

Kitten points to his name on the card, just below the circled match.

XK: Mine! I have been bumped for a bunk of doll bludgers from back home, I have been the one shiny contribution from Australia to this company and I get pushed down for this?! The Majesty, Apocalypse? Never heard of 'em. Fozzy McQueen? The best thing that yobbo did for this company was leave and this guy, this guy's not even from Australia.

Xtreme Kitten points at the only name he hasn't mentioned, Vinj.

XK: Oh sure his passport probably says Australia but the fact is as everyone knows he is from the Hutt River Province, a principality surrounded by Western Australia. The Government mightn't recognise, hell I didn't even now it existed until I heard of Vinj but he is from there, Vinj's head of state is a man that dubbed himself Prince Leonard after declaring independence. I get bump for two nobodies, a bogan wanker and some one as Australian as Kiwis in Bondi... bad example, he's as Australian as Vegemite. That's right people I got bumped for Vegemite, where the hell is Dick Smith when I need him?

Lucy: You realise only the people you are pissed off about will get that?

Lucy walks into shot wearing a Karnivool T-shirt and blue jeans.

XK: Your wrong, people back in Australia will understand.

Lucy: I meant of people in the arena.

XK: Again you are wrong, that bird that's with the psycho woman she should get it. What' 'er name? Elly, Ellywen?

Lucy: They call her Ed.

XK: Ed right, now Ed there's an Australian that knows her place-

Lucy cuts in.

Lucy: Between Ghost's thighs?

Xtreme Kitten just stares at Lucy to a moment in silence, cut to something else.

[align=center]Posted Image VS. Posted Image[/align]

JH: The following match is a standard match pitting Kennedy against the Undisputed International Champion Xtreme Kitten in a non-title match.

CM: Off a great win last week it looks like Kennedy has an opportunity to deliver a victory again this time over a Champion.

CL: Well while the both of you drool over the fact that Kennedy is off to a great start on the newly merged FIW, I see otherwise as Xtreme Kitten has the talent behind him.

CM: A guy with a mask?

CL: A guy that would have clearly been a great asset to NGIW, but yet he was stuck on Slam! for so long, what a pity.

The house lights fade as the opening chord to Rob Zombie's "Living Dead Girl" rips through the speakers. As the chorus quickly follows, white strobes blink in time with the hard beats.

[align=center]Crawl on me, sink into me
Die for me, living dead girl
Crawl on me, sink into me
Die for me, living dead girl
[/align]

Kennedy pushes her way through the curtain, stepping center stage in the dark, only illuminated by the flickering strobes that chase away the darkness for a mere moment and then shorting out in the next. As she advances down the stairs, a spotlight rushing to light her way. She glances around at the crowd, showing no reaction to their various calls.

MA: Making her way to the ring from Los Angeles, California… KEEEENNNNNEEEDDDYYYY!!!!

Reaching the ring, she dives in under the bottom rope, sitting up on her knees and staring out at the crowd beyond the ropes for a moment before climbing to her feet. She moves to the furthest turnbuckle, climbing to the second rope and looking out of the crowd and then dropping back down to the canvas to await the start of the contest.

JH: I’m still amazed that after weeks there has been a word form Kennedy, she is usually more decorated.

CM: Well Sean Madrox did mention a thing about nerdy men talking to her, I guess a bad boy can only get her interested in anything.

CL: Oh umbrella, do you actually think that Sean can get her to open her mouth? He has something else coming to him, what a jack rabbit.

CM: Hey! Sean was the World Heavyweight Champion!

CL: And yet I stand correct…WAS!

A low hum sound comes from the speakers and soon a guitar begins to play with sound effects in the background, drums and the sound steel being hammered comes in at around thirty seconds. Xtreme Kitten appears from behind the curtain as the drums come in; Lucy is following Kitten as she holds onto her large steel chain which as usual is attached to a collar around Xtreme Kitten’s neck. Xtreme Kitten kicks the chain link fence on the stage in time with the beat of the hammer, he stays on the stage kicking until percussion drops out, Kitten snaps to an attention like pose.

[align=center]I clench my teeth and realize
My world is so near its demise
A dying sun in a poisonous sky
Stinging my eyes
Burning with contempt and conflict
[/align]

The percussion comes back with the vocals but the steel sound is gone. Xtreme Kitten starts to walks to the front of the stage and stops at the stairs as Lucy pulls on the chain, they walk down the stairs together and walk towards the ring. Xtreme Kitten and Lucy stop at ring side.

[align=center]As of now
I am a tool
Of severe impact
[/align]

MA: Making his way to the ring, hailing from Shoal Bay, Australia…XTREEEEEEMEEEEE KITTEEEEEEN!!!

Xtreme Kitten begins to move as the steel sound comes back, he once again kicks the fencing with the sound. Lucy leads Xtreme Kitten around the ring, they stop near the ring stairs as the music drops out, the bass booms, the music comes back and Xtreme Kitten and Lucy head up the stairs.

[align=center]I clench my fist and visualize
The blood that is spilled is our own
I open wide my bloodshot eyes
Count the dead
A result of dysfunction
[/align]

Lucy undoes the collar around Xtreme Kitten’s neck during the verse, the music is cut, and Lucy hopes off the apron, Xtreme Kitten steps into the ring and goes to his corner ready to start the match.

CL: And there you have it, a wrestler that is a great fucking Champion!

CM: I can see that he has you enthusiastic about actually watching the match and doing your job for once.

JH: *Bites his tongue*

CL: Martin you shouldn’t even go on about talking when it comes to work, I mean I don’t sit there and bitch and moan…or better yet drool when women wrestle.

Michaela Menendez checks with both wrestlers to make sure everything is alright for the match before signaling for the bell to start the match.

[align=center]DING! DING![/align]
No sooner the belt is rung and Kennedy dives forward with a headscissor takedown on the monster folding him inside out as he crashes down to the canvas. Kennedy grabs Xtreme Kitten by the mask and she begins to hammer with left and rights on the Champion, but he throws her off of him and she crash down on the canvas.

JH: This is déjà vu all over again, Kennedy isn’t wasting any time taking down the big man.

CM: She is going to have to do some more damage in order to take Xtreme Kitten down.

CL: Is this her routine in every match now? If I wanted to see what happened last week I would force myself to watch it again.

Kennedy is quickly back up to her feet circling Xtreme Kitten as he takes a longer time making it to his feet. Once he is standing tall, Kennedy charges over at him for a flying lariat, but Xtreme Kitten catches the bombshell in his arms and he executes a fallaway slam and both competitors crash down to the canvas with a huge thud.

JH: Kennedy was looking for that flying lariat, but Xtreme Kitten demonstrates his strength by catching her in midair.

CM: This isn’t a walk in the park for Kennedy, she needs to rethink her strategy against Xtreme Kitten.

CL: Did you see how he perfectly delivered that fallaway slam, he could have broken Kennedy in half, hell I know I would have.

Kennedy is clutching the side of her abdomen as she pulls herself up to her feet and Xtreme Kitten grabs a hand full of hair as he whips her into the corner turnbuckle. She slams into it and stumbles forward a few feet as Xtreme Kitten comes charging and he plants her in the corner turnbuckle with a hellacious clothesline.

JH: So far it isn’t looking to good for Kennedy, I though that she would have been dominating in this match.

CM: Everyone seems to underestimate Xtreme Kitten.

CL: Xtreme Kitten laid that clothesline pretty well, did you see how Kennedy’s head bounced off of the turnbuckle?

Kennedy pulls herself back up with the ropes still in the corner and Xtreme Kitten readies himself for another clothesline, but Kennedy ducks in the nick of time and Xtreme Kitten crashes face first into the turnbuckle. He turns around and Kennedy drives a vicious knee to the sternum. Xtreme Kitten drops down to one knee and Kennedy continues you the assault with another knee, then another knee, and to top it off she lands a knee into the face of Xtreme Kitten who falls on his back.

JH: And there is the turn around in the match, now Kennedy needs to capitalize while she has Xtreme Kitten down.

CM: She better come up with something fairly quick.

CL: Honest mistake by the big man, but that doesn’t warrant a shot for Kennedy to anything drastic in the match…I mean she is a woman.

Xtreme Kitten lifts his torso up and Kennedy takes the time to lunge off of the turnbuckle with a dropkick to the face of Xtreme Kitten laying him out. Xtreme Kitten cradles his mouth with his hands as he checks for blood and in fact he does have a busted lip. He wipes the blood on his forearm as he gets up and meets Kennedy face to face in the middle of the ring, he grabs her by the neck and raises her up off of the floor as Michaela begins to count.

JH: Kennedy has busted Xtreme Kitten in the mouth, you can see the blood trickling down his mouth and mask.

CM: It only looks like she made it worse for herself.

CL: Look at the strength he has, maybe she will see Jordon Collier from the 4400.

JH: You like that show too, I can’t believe that someone else besides me likes the show, I can’t believe that Jordon came back…

CL: Its called sarcasm Jonathan, maybe you should look in a dictionary once in a while.

Xtreme Kitten slams Kennedy down to the canvas with a huge thud as she lies lifeless and Xtreme Kitten drops down and he hooks the left of the former Dual Crown Champion.


[align=center]ONE![/align]


[align=center]TWO![/align]


[align=center]KICK-OUT BY KENNEDY![/align]

Xtreme Kitten gets up and he pulls Kennedy up with him and he hoist Kennedy into a vertical position upside down. He holds her there for a few seconds even with one hand before falling back with her and they both crash down to the canvas with a thud. Kennedy lifts her lower back from the canvas in pain and Xtreme Kitten gets up to his feet and he drops down for an elbow drop, but Kennedy moves out of the way in time!

CL: Did you see the strength from Xtreme Kitten, he handled Kennedy like she was a rag doll.

JH: Xtreme Kitten was looking for an elbow drop, but Kennedy moved out of the way in the nick of time.

CM: I was expecting Xtreme Kitten to nail it, but Kennedy is still in the match.

Kennedy gets back up to her feet and Xtreme Kitten turns around only to have Kennedy floor him to the canvas with a dropkick to the face. Xtreme Kitten lands on his back holding his lower jaw in pain as Kennedy grabs him by the mask pulling him up to his feet with all her might.

CL: She is going to need to workout a little more in order to get XK up, maybe some boxing with Ghost?

CM: I don’t know about boxing with Ghost it might lead into a full blown lesbian action.

CL: I think Ghost will knock Kennedy’s head off of her shoulders.

JH: Kennedy flew in the air like a bird and was still able to land a much needed dropkick on Xtreme Kitten, marvelous.

Kennedy gets Xtreme Kitten on his knees and she just shrugs for a bit and she takes a few steps back before charging at Xtreme Kitten and she lands a roundhouse kick sending the Champion down to the canvas once again. Kennedy quickly ascends the turnbuckle and she snaps backwards pushing herself off and she executes a moonsult on Xtreme Kitten followed by hooking the leg.

JH: This can be the end of the match…


[align=center]ONE![/align]


[align=center]KICK-OUT BY XTREME KITTEN![/align]

CL: I didn’t think that it was going to end that quickly.

CM: I agree with you on that one.

Kennedy is upset and she gets up to her feet dragging Xtreme Kitten up to his knees and she slams him face first into her knee knocking him back for a daze. Xtreme Kitten shakes his head as he gets up to his feet and Kennedy comes charging at him for another headscissor takedown, but Xtreme Kitten counters the move and he plants her in the middle of the ring with a high-impact powerbomb.

JH: Kennedy tried to faze Xtreme Kitten with some knees to the head, but it didn’t seem to affect him at all.

CL: Why would a move like that affect him anyways, he just had a hard time getting a hold of Kennedy. The bitch has been flipping all over the damn ring.

CM: Xtreme Kitten must have had done a number on Kennedy after that move.

Kennedy is on the canvas roll around as Xtreme Kitten bends over and he pulls up tree-time FIW lady by the hair to her feet, he hoists her over his shoulder and then drives her down to the canvas with a military pressed spine buster.

CL: Damn he is a monster, I think a few more spine busters and we might never hear another word from Kennedy.

JH: How can you say such a thing about the only women in FIW history to have held the Dual Crown Championship.

CM: I think it’s easy for him to say things.

Xtreme Kitten once again grabs Kennedy and he pulls her up to her feet and he whips her into the ropes and on the rebound he throat thrusts her and she falls down to her knees clutching her neck.

CL: SPEAK NOW!

JH: GOOOOOD SWEEEEET COOOORN!!!

CM: What the hell was that, Jonathan?

JH: Look what he did, he could have ruptured her vocie box!

CL: Not like she was using the damn thing.

Kennedy continues to clutch her neck as Xtreme Kitten stands over her and he grabs her by the hair and she shoots up grabbing Xtreme Kitten by the head and she slams down causing the Champion to suffer a jawbreaker! Xtreme Kitten falls back on his ass as Kennedy struggles up coughing a bit trying to get some kind of words out, but nothing.

CL: FOR THE LOVE OF CHULUPAS!!!

JH: That’s right Kennedy mess up his jaw its only fair!

CM: Aren’t you taking this a little too far Jonathan, what’s with the fucking school girl act.

Kennedy continues to cough in the corner as she spits out trying to clear her throat as Xtreme Kitten on the other hand is getting up to his feet holding his jaw. Kennedy turns around seeing an opportunity and she takes it as she charges over at Xtreme Kitten who turns around and Kennedy leaps into the air and she executes a knee to the side of Xtreme Kitten’s head. Kennedy crashes on top of Xtreme Kitten as his head bounces off of the canvas.

CM: THAT SPLINTERED!

JH: THE SHOT HEARD AROUND THE WORLD…CAN THIS BE…

Kennedy drops down and she quickly hooks the leg as Michaela is already on the canvas for the count, could this be it!

[align=center]ONE![/align]


[align=center]TWO![/align]


[align=center]THREE![/align]


[align=center]DING-DING-DING![/align]

CL: I can’t believe that…what a fucking upset, I think I’m going to go regurgitate what I had for lunch.

MA: HERE IS YOUR WINNER…KENNNNNNNNEDY!!!

JH: I knee that she could do, I had a feeling that she would beat him, but I didn’t want to ruin it so I kept it to myself.

CM: Just shut the fuck up Jonathan.

We return ourselves for a brief interlude in the forest where we saw Kiyoshi Nakahata write his diary just over a week ago. Today we see both Kiyoshi and his manager, Daisuke 'The Crow' Tanaka standing in in their black suits and sunglasses, prepared for what looks a reasonably standard promo. We can see neither men's eyes until Daisuke takes his off and starts to speak. Meanwhile, Kiyoshi could well be asleep as he lets his head roll back as looks at the sky.

Daisuke: I am sorry to interrupt your week's viewing, Fans of FIW, but there is something I fear I must get off my chest. Last week, we were all treated to a quaint little three hand game called "How much of a beating can I lay on Graver?" The answer, my friends, was a surprisingly large amount. And like all good games, the winner recieved quite the prize: the Fighting Spirit Championship. While I may have looked on wearing some kind of white tinted glasses, I perhaps would have scored this game in favour of Nakahata-dono.

As Daisuke raises his arm to point out his charge, Kiyoshi still seems to have his head in the clouds. Unfazed, Daisuke continues.

Daisuke: As I freely admit, my view on matters might be slightly, how you say, skewed, but it does strike me that the man who lost the game may well have taken the fair day turkey home anyway. It matters little; the true name of the game is Fighting Spirit. Nightmare, for me all this is merely a passing thought but it may something for you to think about when you stare at your reflection in your new belt. I suspect these doubts could easily have been raised whoever won last week; but I am sure as you look at your prize, into your own eyes, you will see there is only one way to set them down... Otherwise...

Daisuke leaves the rest of the sentence hanging, and sends it unspoken on the wings of his supremely irritating laugh, reminiscent of the bird he takes his name from. Kiyoshi cuts him off by clapping his hand on his companion's shoulder.

Kiyoshi: There's no need to provoke him. It defeats the whole purpose.

Daisuke: I suppose you're right. But remember I don't share your faith that every man will eventually get what he deserves through hard work alone. I know you want to keep it solely between you and him, and if you really want to keep management out, and he does try to duck yo-

Kiyoshi: I know you will. Until then though, leave it.

Daisuke hesitates before nodding his agreement, before Kiyoshi takes his sunglasses off and continues, this time in English.

Kiyoshi: Nightmare; under European codes of honour, it is your right to choose the manner of our contest, and I am prepared to accept any stipulations that do not, in my opinion, go against the spirit of the title we shall be fighting over. But remember it is your choice, both whether we do fight and the way we do it; do not let anyone else decide for you. My piece is spoken, all that remains is the fight.

[align=center]**COMMERCIAL BREAK**[/align]
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The screen peters in to a set of rasping knuckles rattling against a grainy backdrop. The backdrop opens – it’s a door idiots – and Fozzy appears on the other side with a camcorder in hand.

Fozzy: Hey, youse are filmin’ me filmin’ you. That’s like, philosophical…for… somethin’.

The Majesty: Stop yappin’, Fozz. You’re making the English language look bad.

Fozzy: Stop…breathing…TITBOY.

The Majesty: Titboy?

Fozzy: Yeah, alright.

Fozzy realises the folly of his insult and throws the camcorder at Maj’s head in order to maintain his alpha male presence. The blow forces him to drop his hand over ever corner of the round table...which is technically no where…Ooo…figure that one out.

The Majesty: Awww, bloody HELL!

Maj continues to curse as he rubs his sore spot while Fozzy crosses his arms at the owner of the pair of knuckles what knocked at his door.

Fozzy: Tier. Tiery, Tiery me. Ha, been savin’ that one for ages. Not wearin’ a dress anymore, I see. *Fozz suddenly gets a look of disgust/concern on his face.* What’s up with your eyes, mate? They’re all blacked out and whatnot…emo as.

Tier modestly walks into the door, shoving his way past Fozz whilst hiding any aggressive guise. All three men turn to Tier as he finds a wall to lean against.

Tier: Well, you boys seem to be in a spot of trouble.

Fozz ignores Tier and goes with his original train of thought.

Fozzy: So, are ya blind now or is it just like wearin’ a pair of sunnies?

Tier smirks darkly.

Tier: Were I not attempting to remain professional about all of this, I'd hollow the globules that rest in your skull with a teaspoon.

Tier stares Fozz down for a moment then gets back to the business at hand.

Tier: This is the situation, gentlemen; I'm fully capable and completely justified in dragging you all through the American justice system. I'm sure that'd have a lovely effect on your radio show, Fozzy, and your MMA contract, Apocalypse. But I decided to be civil and give you another chance. A game of chance.

Tier’s gives the audience a gander at his trademark Cheshire cat grin.

Tier: War, specifically. Two cards, all the stakes. Chose a champion, gentlemen. If you win, I pay you twice what was agreed on and you don't have to do a damn thing. If you lose, then I'll receive the same thing; double your collective salaries to compensate for my time.

Fozzy: The bloody hell are you on about, ya stupid knob’ead, I’ve got loads of money. I was three time stuffin’ Dual Crown champ. I’m not wrestlin’ for you or anyone. Anyways, Pocco, youse got about eighty grand there, right?

Apocalypse: Sixty. Most of it Maj’s. I ain’t puttin’ it down though. Someone else do it.

The Majesty grumbles about something…

Fozzy: I think I’ll be right. You never beat me before, Poida. Never will.

Tier gets up calmly and noses Fozzy. But as soon as anything looks like happening the superstars note the crawl of smoke making its way through the doorway like an octopus over rocks. A familiar voice then rattles into our ears, though it sounds somehow crisper than it once did.

????: Ya know…I couldn’t smoke for years because of that gas mask. Didn’t know what I was missing out on.

One of the only true familiar masks of past TNT superstar slaps against the floor. The sweet aroma of blood, sweat and tears wafts through the air into Tier’s nose, hitting him right in ‘the spot’. Perhaps taking him back to his past; and dare I say ‘better days’? I do.

????: Tell me again…what kind of war are we talking about?

Tier: Just a card game. But for you I think I can-

Before Tier can finish his sentence a cigarette flies into the room follow by a swift clap of the former TNT Legend’s boots; the lens revealing himself to be…

Tier: …Vinj.

Vinj: Tier.

No, not some odd Vinj-Tier mutant. Just Vinj.

Tier: I knew it was too good to be true.

Vinj half chuckles and picks up the depressed mask that rests at his feet.

Vinj: The mask was just metaphorical. Actually, I had intended to give it to one of his fans while I was here. Some kid with cancer probably. Give it to one of those terminal cases, that way I could take it back after he died. Give a little…take a lot. You know how it goes.

Tier: Still bearing a grudge, are we?

Vinj: Nah. I’d rather forgive. I have the moral high ground that way. The view’s not as good, but the rent’s cheaper. Anyways, enough of that. What’s this about a war?

Tier: As I said; it's a card game.

Vinj: Ah k. Mind if I up the wager then?

Tier's eyebrow curls above his soulless eye.

Tier: You've got more than eighty thousand dollars.

The disbelief isn't at all hidden from his voice.

Vinj: Not here. But I can give you something else. An unpaid contract.

Tier ponders the request for a moment and then eyes off Dope’s mask in Vinj’s hand.

Vinj: no, bro.

Tier nods.

Tier: Agreed. Your... Majesty. If you would?

Maj looks to Fozz who gives him a nod. Maj then, as begrudged as humanly possible, shuffles the disheveled pile of cards into a neat stack and places it on the table.

Tier: You first.

He slides the deck Vinj's way, and Vinj plucks the first card off the top. He flips it over and lays it down on the table. A Jack of Diamonds.

Tier: How fitting, Jack.

Tier nods in Vinj’s direction and Vinj returns it with a blank stare.

Fozzy: Yeah, Tier, you got Jack squat now…wait, that wasn’t funny. Man, I’m so out of it. Must be jet lag or sumthin’. Ear pressure and crap.

The Majesty: S’alright. You’ll get it back. Just need a few more drinks is all.

Maj gives Fozz a reassuring pat on the shoulder. Meanwhile Tier ignores them, his eyes and mind set completely on Vinj.

Tier: So how long do I get to keep you, hmm?

Vinj: Two months?

Tier: Five.

A prolonged silence irons out conversation as Tier narrows his black orbs and pulls the card from the top.

Vinj: Three.

Tier nods, then without looking he flips it over and lays it face-up. King of Spades.

The Majesty: RHUBARB!!

Maj gets a couple awkward stares from Fozz and Pocco.

The Majesty: Wha? It’s what they say in the courts an’ that.

Tier simply continues to ignore the others and smiles, nodding at Vinj.

Tier: I'll see you next week, then, Vinj.

Tier bum pushes his seat into Fozzy as he gets up and makes his exit, making sure Fozz knows about his victory. Once Tier leaves Fozzy sits down opposite Vinj, slightly guilt-stricken at the course of events that just transpired.

Fozzy: Hey, mate, thanks for that. That was…it was real good of yas.

Vinj doesn’t register Fozzy’s discourse; rather he transfixes his attention down at the King of Spades. After a moment he raises his head, tracing the line of his teeth with his tongue and showing off his pearly visage. Vinj slowly gets up and makes for the door. The others look on in silence as he stops and half turns his face, cornering his eyes to get a last glance of the table.

Vinj: King…

Vinj walks out, the clap of his boots wearing thin as the screen fades in, leaving the audience time to ponder the significance of the nights events.

Whipped up a promo for the show, seeing as I though having some presence there would be a good idea. Not great, but better than nothing.. sorry if my attempts at writing the commentators sucked ass, it's been a while.

[align=center]Yeah, uh-huh, that’s what they all say[/align]

Local H is accompanied by explosions erupting all around the stage, ReVoltrons and even the ring itself, perhaps against the advice of some fire marshals. While this sort of thing is nothing new for an entrance by the arrogant Master of the Rage, there are a few things thrown into the mix this time around. From around the stage and big screens spray different coloured mini-fireworks; blues, reds, greens and yellows all bathing the arena in light and a smoky haze.

After this visual and audio barrage things start to settle down, so the mixed reaction from the fans can be heard. Most of them are booing in typical fashion, but a few have cottoned onto FIW’s almost overabundance of bad guys at the top and can’t help but feel they may as well get on side with one of them. Plus some fans just like bad guys, okay? Don’t judge them because they don’t conform. All eyes expectantly turn to the stage but unusually there is no-one forthcoming… yet. The music just continues to play, and the anxious crowd in attendance gets impatient. They’re not the only ones.

CM: “Listen to these fans, they’re desperate to see the new champione. I can see you are too, Hitchen.”

CL: “By the doors of Sarnath, Ragin’ does like to take his time. I guess it’s worth waiting for quality.”

JH:”He’s not on the card. I’d rather just get on with the show and watch some good, old-fash-”

[align=center] BANG! [/align]

CL: “Ha. I’m not sure which of you two crapped yourselves more.”

CM: “What? It didn’t even startle me. That was all Hitchen.”

Another flash of light, this time coming from seemingly nowhere leaves more than a few people seeing red spots. Red and black confetti and balloons start falling from hidden departments in the arena ceiling, starting out at a trickle but quickly becoming a waterfall of colour. They land amongst the first few rows of the crowd members and in the ring itself, no doubt pissing off the employees who have to tidy this mess before the next match. There is no expense spared by the new Dual Crown champion it would seem. Fittingly pictures of the belts appear on the ReVoltrons, but of the Russians there is no sign.

CM: “Ooooh. Pretty. Look they even have his face on them!

JH: “.. and yet still there’s no sign of Ragin’ or Natalya Vladek, they’re just wasting our damn time.”

CL: “You’re just sore because no-one has ever cared when you walked into this arena.”

CM: “Haha.. yeah. if it weren’t for this low pitched whining in my ear, I probably wouldn’t notice you were here Hitchen.”

A video starts to play on the ReVoltrons. It is of a party, and the overwhelming feeling is of its size. The most fitting word would probably be ‘epic’. There are countless people crammed into a vast hall, or ballroom, or whatever it is, all clutching glasses of what is undoubtedly alcoholic liquid. The men are dressed smartly, most in suits or tuxedos, though with the drink flowing a few top buttons have become loose and ties and bowties have been relieved of duty. The women are also well dressed, but there’s no shortage of skin on show and this place may actually be the biggest dose of bosom per square foot anywhere in the world right now.

The camera weaves around, showing countless unknown people making idle chit-chat around tables often stacked high with glasses, booze overflowing. Around the room are numerous posters, pictures and even tapestries of Ragin’, with some depicting him as famous people or in famous poses like that of Michelangelo’s David or Auguste Rodin’s Thinker statue or depicted on horseback in the style of Jacque-Louis David.

The camera finally searches out the Master of the Rage, sat on a comfy but exquisite couch, a beverage in one hand, a cigar in the other and surrounded by women. The two closest to him are both stroking title belts on their laps as they make small talk. Ragin’ whispers something in one of the girl’s ears, causing her to giggle. He pushes himself up from the couch with two women dangling from his arm and nods at Natalya, who his sat opposite with a few open-mouthed gentlemen. The video starts to fade out and once the screens go black, one final explosion of fireworks ends the sequence.

CM: “Not many people know, but I was invited to that party. I have work commitments though sadly.”

JH: “Work? Is that what you call what you do?”

CL: “Regardless, it seems we won’t be seeing him in person tonight. Shame, I was hoping he might have a few words for us at least.”

JH: “You’re right, it appears the new champ has better things to do. Mores the damn pity.. on with the show..”
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[align=center]Posted Image VS. Posted Image VS. Posted Image VS. Posted Image VS. Posted Image VS. Posted Image[/align]

JH: And finally we’ve come to the main event ladies and gentlemen, a six way scramble for a shot at the International Championship to be used at any time.

CM: What is with all these scrambles lately?

CL: What are you rambling on about now?

CM: The scrambles, first last week with the Fighting Spirit Championship where Grimace won, and now the main event this week.

JH: Maybe Tier has scrambled eggs for brains…[/muttering]

CL: Don’t make me smack you Bitchen.


MA: Ladies and gentlemen we are now set for this edition of ReVolt’s scheduled main event. It is a six man scramble with one fall to a finish and it is for a shot at the FIW Undisputed International Championship that may be used at any time. Your official for this contest is Tony Clarke.


Suddenly Hell’s Bells by AC/DC starts blasting over the sound system as the ReVoltron springs to life with a video package of Jim O’Brien as the fans react with mild cheers!


CL: What in the great wide world of sports?!

CM: I thought this guy slit his wrists and died or some thing?

JH: It’s Jim! It’s Jim! Oh my god, it’s Jim O’Brien!

CL: Calm the fuck down, it’s just Grizzly Adams.

JH: He is here to get revenge on Samael! The true Monster of FIW is here to take his rightful name sake!

CM: Jeez, this so boring, wake me up when some thing interesting happens, that, ya know, doesn’t suck.


The cheers from the fans steadily grow as the song continues to play and all the FIW staff members look on in puzzlement. Just as suddenly as the entrance started it stops and the fans are left in confusion.


CM: Oh good, look, it stopped.

JH: What is going on?!

CL: Ha, ha, Bitchen got all marked out for nothing.

JH: No! I’m sure Jim is here! I’m sure of it! Some thing inside of my bones tells me the man is in the building!

CM: Denial, such an amusing emotion.

CL: Yeah shit stain, get over it, he isn’t here, but who the fuck did that any wa-


The lights dim and turn blue as the bass line to Holy Diver by Killswitch Engage hits on the speakers. As the music blares, a mixed reaction emanates from the fans as Samael makes his way onto the stage. As the song continues, Samael makes his way out from behind the curtain and through the doorway of the gate as short bursts of blue pyro erupt from above on either side of the entrance. He starts walking down the walkway and the reaction from the crowd intensifies as he nears the ring. Once near the apron, he turns toward the fans, taunting them a bit before he enters the ring over the top rope. He moves to a corner and leans in it slightly and awaits the start of the match as the music fades out and the lights return to normal.


MA: Introducing first, he hails from El Paso, Texas and weighs in tonight at three hundred and five pounds, and stands at exactly six feet and seven inches…HE! IS! SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMAEL~!!!


JH: Damn it! It was him! It was him! He pulled that trick!

CL: Oh quit your fucking whining you little British bitch.

JH: I am English, not British.

CM: Basically the same thing, Bitchen.

CL: Yeah, course if you tell any English bastard that and he gets all pissy like our little princess here.

CM: Heh, it’s like being from Texas and saying you aren’t an Americans but Texans.


The arena lights begin to faint as smoke fills the entryway the first few rifts of “Attack” engages in recreation on the PA system as a silhouette can be seen behind the thick smoked stage area and red strobe lights begin to flicker on and off.

[align=center]I WON'T SUFFER, BE BROKEN
GET TIRED, OR WASTED
SURRENDER TO NOTHING
I'LL GIVE UP WHAT I STARTED
AND STOPPED IT
FROM END TO BEGINNING
A NEW DAY IS COMING
AND I AM FINALLY FREE
[/align]

The roof of the arena rattles as the base kicks in and Sean Madrox emerges from the smoke and a strobe light radiates his complex body to the crowd’s jeers as he stands on the stage glancing from left to right with his World Heavyweight Championship fastened around his waist. He begins to walk down the steel steps admiring his own physique and raises his hand into the air forming the infamous ‘X’ as the jeers ring out loudly and he can’t help but display a devilish smirk across his face as he points at the Championship.

[align=center]RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY
I’LL ATTACK
RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY
GO CHANGE YOURSELF
RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY
NOW I’LL ATTACK
I’LL ATTACK, I’LL AA WHOAAAAAAAAAAAAA
[/align]

Sean reaches the apron and he jumps up on it looking at both sides, then he flips over the top rope into the ring. He climbs the turnbuckles and he removes the Championship from his waist and hoists it in the air pointing at it with confidence; before jumping down and removing his sleeveless hoodie and shades. He places his belongings to the side waiting for his opponent to make their way to the ring.


MA: And now introducing his opponent, he hails from Fairfield, CT and weighs in tonight at two hundred and forty pounds and stands at six feet and five inches…HE! IS! SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEANNNNNNNNNN MMMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAAADRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOX~!!!


CL: And here comes Floppity Flippity McFlyagully.

JH: Last week Madrox is one of two men in this match that failed to capture the FIW Dual Crown Championship, perhaps he can redeem himself this week.

CM: Wow, it sounds like he made a fan out of you, Bitchen.

JH: While I respect his ability and drive after he showed it inside the Cube, I still think he has a poor attitude.

CL: Ability and Sean Madrox go together like oil and water.

CM: Oh, so they go together about as well as women and your sex life I see.


From the arena P.A. system arises Grant Rice’s music. The bass thumps through the arena’s sound system as we await Grant.

[align=center]You Can Hate Me

You Can Hate Me

Hate The Air That I Breathe

Air That I Breathe

Cause I’m The Next Thing To Be

Next Thing To Be

Well I Ain’t You and You Ain’t Me![/align]

Grant slowly emerges from the curtains and onto the stage. He is met with a chorus of boo’s from the fans before he even has a chance to do anything to provoke them. Grant just ignores them as he walks forward before stopping to look out into the crowd. He shakes his head before continuing down the steps and proceeds to walk down the aisle toward the ring.

Grant nears the ring as he glances off into the crowd but pays them no attention before he climbs up the stairs and into the ring. Grant takes off his shirt and walks over to the ropes where he goes to throw it into the crowd, but he catches himself and tosses it to the mat below which draws some heat from the crowd. Grant waves them off as he walks to the corner and awaits the start of the match.


MA: And introducing their opponent, he hails from Kansas City, Missouri and weighs in tonight at two hundred and eighty pounds, and stands at six feet and three inches…HE! IS! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNT RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICE~!!!


CM: …Who is this guy and why is he taking up time that could be used for Matt Impact’s spectacular entrance?

CL: Jeez, don’t you know any thing? This is Grant Rice; he even wrestled on Slam for a short time.

JH: Yes, and while he only ever managed to pick up one victory on Slam, he certainly has a impressive record else where, like in the now defunct NGIW and V.

CM: Ha, ha, awesome, just goes to show you why Slam’s hardcore action was leagues above Wightraven’s crappycore action.

JH: Well, I wouldn’t say th-

CL: Don’t make me kill you, Chip.


O Fortuna blasts over the PA, presenting a video that puts Prime in a masterpiece light. He poses in and out of shadows, flexing in flickers of white light and then the choir culminates into the final chord…

The grinding hard rock of Princes of the Universe starts to bellow over the PA as the arena lights give way to a spectacular pyro burst and celestial light show. Prime walks out onto the stage with his head hung. A soon as he stands before the capacity crowd, he reels back and pops off a shouting Triple H pose into the Randy Orton “Legend Killer” pose but modified into more of a flex and grin. A machine gun pyro effect pops all around him and consumes his body in smoke. Prime then burst from the smoke all pumped up and ready to go. He makes his way confidently to the ring, eyeing his opponent the while time. With ease, he leaps up onto the apron and all four posts and four matching ceiling sets burst in a sparkling flare. Prime ducks between the ropes and heads right to the turnbuckle. Once he stands on the middle rope, Prime throws out his “Prime pose” once again and then leaps backward off the turnbuckle and bounces to warm up before his match.



MA: And introducing next, he hails from San Diego, California and weighs in tonight at three hundred and ten pounds and stands at six feet and ten inches…HE! IS! PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMME~!!!


JH: Last time we saw this man he quite the lose at the hands of Matt Impact at Dangerous Liaisons.

CL: So tell me Chip, how does it feel to have a jobber be a former World Champion for your brand?

CM: I can’t shed any light on that, but maybe you could, after all I hear Dante Coles was NGIW’s top champion a lot.

JH: Chip…

CL: Oh please, that was weak, I have four words for you, Grimace, your world champion.

CM: Oh yeah, well…damn it…I told have a come back for that, you got me there.


The drum and guitar beat courtesy of Disturbed kick in as the lights in the arena dim down a little as a white spotlight focuses on the entrance stage. The crowd know who is coming out as soon as the music and lights dim as they begin to get up on their feet, throw up their middle fingers, boo the holy hell, and basically do all they can do as a crowd to boo one of the biggest pompous assholes there is!. The words of “I’m Alive” kick in as slowly from the entrance curtain walks out Matt Impact wearing his usual wrestling attire and t-shirt over his sweaty body sporting the latest logos, and as soon as Impact steps foot out of the curtain and onto the concrete stage the crowds boos somehow manage to grow louder.

[align=center]Never again will I be dishonored,
And never again will I be reminded,
Of living within the world of the jaded,
They kill inspiration,
It's my obligation!
To never again, allow this to happen,
Where do I begin?
The choices are endless,
Denying the sin,
My art, my redemption,
I carry the torch of my fathers before me![/align]


Matt begins to slowly make his way down to the ring as he walks down the stage to jeers and negative chants from the crowd as on the sides of the camera you can see fans sticking their arms over the fencing as long as possible to get their middle finger seen on camera pointing at the arrogant Impact. He just smirks them off as he holds his chin high and proudly in the air. As Matt reaches the ring and the chorus quickly nears to his entrance music, he walks up the steel steps, walking across the black FIW logo apron to the center before entering the ring over the black middle rope.

[align=center]The thing I treasure most in life cannot be taken away!
There will never be a reason why I will surrender to your advice!
To change myself, I'd rather die!
Though they will not understand!
I will make the greatest sacrifice!
You can't predict where the outcome lies!
You'll never take me alive!
I'm alive!
I'm alive!
I'm alive!
[/align]

Impact goes to the nearest turnbuckle and hopes up to the middle rope and pounds his right fist into his chest before kissing it and lifting it into the air as he hops down and does the same thing on the opposite turnbuckle, to that, the crowd responds with more middle fingers and boos, he then hops off the second turnbuckle, and moves to the middle of the ring as the lights are still dim, and he then in a fashionable way grabs off his t-shirt and then comes down with a huge flex of his muscles as the lights turn on and he grabs his dropped t-shirt and taunts the crowd by pretending to throw it at them, but smirks as he hands it to a ring official outside the ring. He then goes to the nearest corner leaning against it fixing his trunks, pads, and boots and stretching out a bit before the match.


MA: And introducing next, he hails from Staten Island, New York and weighs in tonight at two hundred and eighty six pounds and stands at six feet and five inches…HE! IS! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATT IIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACT~!!!


CL: You know, I like Impact’s style, not only is he set on winning this match, but he’s already put the challenge out for a rematch against Ragin’.

JH: Some might call that arrogance.

CM: And those people are idiots or British, like you.

JH: For the last time, I’m not British, I’m English.

CL: Pffft, whatever Britty.

CM: Think we honestly care, huh Bitchen?


A soft yet tune begins to play over the P.A. system as a man’s voice rings out…

[align=center]”Journey with me
Into the mind of a maniac
Doomed to be a killer”[/align]


The once soft tune is replaced by a guitar playing over the P.A. system as the Ton springs to life with the words that read “Your Straight Edge Savior”. Slowly the lights shift to a soft and light shade of blue, giving the arena almost a heavenly glow.

[align=center] Can't you see I feel your pain?
I've got Jesus running through my veins
In this hopeless life that's turned on you
Give yourself to me, I'll help you through
I feed off your unanswered fear
When visions of life's end appear
Hand over your will and then you'll see
Now get on your knees and worship me[/align]


A few darker blue strobe lights scan across the fans in attendance as clouds of smoke appears seemingly out of nowhere and covers every inch of the arena. Suddenly quite a few fans start to jeer as the strobe lights all at once move towards one single area in the crowd.

[align=center] Worship me
On your knees
Worship me [/align]


Various clips of Onikage’s matches through out his FIW career show on the big screen. Mean while the row of fans near the exit on the right side of the arena facing the ring start to go crazy as security starts to run up to them. The reason why becomes apparent when a figure steps out from the exit, his long dark hair hiding his face from the cameras and fans.

[align=center] In this world when at it's best
Of never ending hate and death
Abandon all and trust in me
Escaping from reality
My world it has no space or time
The crippled walk and the sick feel fine
Hand over your will and then you'll see
Now get on your knees and worship me[/align]


Several figures appear behind this man and look some what younger than him as they sport black TNT t-shirts. Whipping his head back the man’s hair flies out of his face and reveals the leather mask all too familiar to the FIW audience. The self-proclaimed Straight Edge Savior lifts his arms up to above his shoulders and is showered with jeers. Satisfied with the reaction from the crowd Onikage drops his arms and casually walks down the steps of the arena towards the bottom level of the seats, his pupils are right behind him.

[align=center] Worship me
On your knees
Worship me
[/align]

Onikage reaches the bottom level and now the fans are right in the masked man’s face, throwing insults his way. The students try to keep the fans at bay while one of them walks ahead of Onikage, creating a path for him. He pauses when at the barricade for a single moment, looking out at the fans one last time before the student who created the path and he hop over the guard rail. The other students aren’t far behind as they shortly hop the guard rail too.

[align=center] Beyond this wall of life unknown
I'll lead you where you need to go
Void of worry, stress and pain
Left with nothing but your name
We've washed your brain and cleansed your soul
Till' nothing's all you need to know
Hand over your will and then you'll see
Now get on your knees and worship me [/align]


To the delight of none of the fans in the entire arena Onikage walks around ringside as his students take a seat on the outside. Swiftly Onikage slides into the ring and rolls right up onto his knees while he unzips his wind breaker and throws it off of himself. Allowing his arms to fall limp against the canvas Onikage stares up at the ceiling of the arena and nods his head to the line “Now get on your knees and worship me”. Once the music fades Onikage pushes himself up to his feet and awaits the match to begin as the lights return to normal.


MA: And introducing the final opponent…He hails from Parts Unknown and weighs in tonight at two hundred and fifty pounds and stands erect at six feet and two inches…HE! IS! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIKAAAAAAAGE~!!!


JH: Some might say that this man last week was robbed of his rightful ownership of the Fighting Spirit Championship after pounding Graver into the ground.

CL: I rather blame him for being the reason we no longer have Graver and instead Ham Fisted Hammy Ham as our Fighting Spirit Champion.

CM: Yeah, sadly no one can seemingly kill the Grimace.

CL: Oh believe me, people have tried, but the bastard keeps on living.

JH: Can we get back to the match at hand, gentlemen?


[align=center] DING DING DING~!!![/align]


As the other four wrestlers exit the ring, Samael and Prime barrel towards one another and towards the center of the very ring, the larger of the two men swings his car door like arm but the Monster of FIW ducks under it and goes behind him. In the blink of an eye Samael grabs a hold of Prime’s shoulder and whips him around, throwing him off balance and allowing the former Openweight Champ to pepper him with a few right hands. With each shot Prime steadily steps farther and farther back, but the smaller of the two men keeps hammering away on him until Prime is just inches from the ropes, Samael wraps his hand tightly around the big guy’s wrist and whips him away. Sounding like a military tank driving through Prime stomps towards the ropes and bounces back off of them, coming back into Samael’s welcoming arms which toss Prime over his head and spike him on his neck with a Northern Lights Bomb!

CL: Say, wasn’t that one of Grizzly Adams’ moves?

JH: Yes! That was Jim’s Spiked Suplex!

CM: Shit, with some thing like that you could cripple some body.

JH: …Jim always did it better than that…

CL: Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Chip?

CM: That Bitchen is in denial that Samael did it better than the old mullet monster? Yeah.

Prime clutches at his neck as he rolls out of the ring and out onto the apron, Samael gets to his feet with a look of intensity, letting out a roar as his muscles flex while he glares at Prime’s fallen frame, he turns around right into a springboard dropkick! Sean Madrox kips up to his feet and scoffs lightly at Samael before pointing to his head, signaling that he has brains, he races away from his much larger foe’s fallen form and towards the ropes, he sling shots off of them in a heart beat. Showing much more grace than Samael’s past foe, Madrox rushes back to the behemoth’s body and in mid-run he leaps into the air, defying gravity Sean slices through the air as he flips, landing on top of Samael with the Full Eclipse! Due to hitting the move with such impact Sean clutches at his rib cage and before he can make a move Samael smartly rolls himself out to safety to avoid being pinned, and sadly for Sean this brings in Matt Impact!

CM: Full Eclipse! Sean just showed that hot shot how it’s done!

CL: How what’s done? How to do a move that hurts yourself as well as your opponent?

JH: Conse, be nice.

CL: Gitchen, fuck you.

JH: Great, another nickname.

CM: Shut the fuck up Bitchen, and Conse, you’re just mad because the only guy you really like in this match has yet to enter it, that Grant guy.

Immediately Sean starts back pedaling as he still clutches at his ribs, unable to get to his feet as Matt stalks him down, burning holes into Madrox’s head, Impact stomps Sean right on the chest and it stuns him long enough for Matt to grab a hold of him. Effortlessly Matt brings the former Slayer up to his feet and stuffs his head in between his legs in a standing head scissors position, Impact wraps his arms around Sean’s body and lifts him up, and quickly spikes him head first with the Package Piledriver! Matt grins in a devilish fashion as he stares down at his handy work, pushing himself up to his feet as he turns around and comes face to face with Grant Rice’s Yakuza Kick, the UZI! Perhaps getting more hang time than he’s ever gotten before Impact soars over the top rope and falls to the outside as Grant grins as he looks down at Sean, who is still clutching at his neck.

JH: Good lord! This match is going too fast to call!

CL: No, it isn’t, Matt just drove Sean down with the Package Piledriver only to get hit in the face with the UZI by Grant and send him to the outside.

CM: Bitchen’s score, zero, Conse’s score, ten grillion.

JH: Grillion isn’t a number or a word…

CM : Shut up Bitchen.

CL: Grillion is just as much a word as any of your silly British slang you bastards from over the pond use, what the hell does that even mean, over the pond? It isn’t a pond! It’s a fucking ocean!

With a hint of arrogance to his swagger, Grant makes his way over to Sean, the Phenomenal one still unaware of Rice’s presence, however in mid-walk a hand wraps around Grant’s throat, lifting him up into the air. He only stays there for a few moments before he comes crashing down onto Onikage’s knee back first with the Spinal Shock, the Straight Edge Savior pushes him off of his knee and sends Grant tumbling to the apron. As he was dealing with Grant Sean slowly started to recover, he is now up to one knee when Onikage turns around to face him, and he walks towards Sean only for him to leap into the air, nailing him right in his leather covered face with a pele Kick! Onikage hits the canvas with a thud as the flip actually causes Madrox to land awkwardly mid-section first on the top rope, slowly he falls off of it and down onto the apron, just as Samael slides back in clutching his ribs.

CM: Pele Kick from Sean Madrox taking both that smelly freak and him down!

JH: And that son of a bitch Samael is re-entering the ring!

CL: Heh, well this is ironic, unless some one gets involved we’ll see the guy who drove Grizzly Adams out of FIW verse the guy who is trying to ensure Grizzly Adams doesn’t return to FIW.

JH: What is with calling Jim Grizzly Adams?

CL: What? Not my fault the fucker looks like Grizzly mother fucking Adams.

CM: He does have a point, I can see the resemblance.

Samael eyes the ring, his eyes finally falling upon the masked oddity as he is starting to his back to his feet, clutching at his forehead from the pele kick, he rushes up from behind and wraps his arms around Onikage’s one arm and neck. His eyes widen as Samael tosses him over his head with a rear katahajime suplex, otherwise more commonly known in FIW as Jim O’Brien’s Hellsplex, Onikage lands right on top of his head! The Straight Edge Savior’s neck contorting disgustingly before he plops down face first onto the canvas, his body lifeless, Samael scrambles on his hands and knees towards Onikage, trying his hardest to end the match early. Though sadly for Samael he suddenly finds himself stuck, as he looks over his shoulder he sees why, Matt Impact holding onto his foot, with a jerk Matt yanks Samael right out of the ring!

CL: Jeez, can’t this Samael kid use any other moves besides Jim’s?

JH: He seems obsessed with taking not only Jim O’Brien’s name sake but his move set as well!

CM: I think it is more of a calling card to Jim if any thing or a message if you wanted to call it that too.

JH:

CL:

CM: What? Can’t I make an informative statement every now and again?

FIW’s new monster is none too happy about being denied his possible chance to win as he throws a right hand at Matt, who returns the favor with a right of his own, and it breaks down to an all out brawl between the two as they battle around ringside. Prime races over towards the two and goes for a double axe handle though both men dodge it, and throw a punch at the same exact time at the larger man, sending him slouching over against the fencing. Though like that Grant is over there as well as he throws a right haymaker, clobbering Samael, but the monster is least of his worries as Matt starts attempting to hammer on him for payback earlier on. Seeing his chance to potentially eliminate one of the challengers, Samael joins in on trying to pound away on Grant, and with it two against one Rice starts to sway a bit, not being able to block as many and hit as affective of punches himself.

JH: We have an all out brawl on the floor!

CL: Like there was ever a question of whether or not utter chaos was gonna ensue, merely a question of when.

CM: Yawn-a-roonie.

CL: Oh please just shut the fuck up if you don’t have any thing productive to say which is, oh wait, that would be never.

CM: Want some thing production? Okay. Your mom is a wrinkled up hoe bag that I’m sure for a buck will bend over and let you hit it doggie style and then let you shit on her chest for free, productive enough for you goth boy?

JH: It would appear Samael and Matt are double teaming Grant in this three way brawl, which is a smart tactic given the fact they can possibly get rid of him from the match.

Despite the fact that he is clearly out numbered Grant continues to fight back, the fans rallying behind him in this brawl due to the fact that they hate him the least out of all of them, suddenly Prime barrels back towards them, spearing Matt against the apron. With the numbers back to even Grant and Samael pretty evenly hammer away on each other, neither man giving an inch to the other while Matt pounds on Prime, slowly with each blow Prime slumping lower and lower. As all this chaos goes on at ringside, Sean starts to stir, shaking his head of the cobwebs and gets to his feet, he looks around and smirks as he grabs a hold of the top rope and leaps up. Madrox springs off of the middle rope to go for an asai moonsault, however in mid-air amazingly a blur dives over the top rope, connecting with a lariat to Sean and sending both men falling on top of all the other four at ringside as they all collapse to the floor!

CM: Ou-ou-ou-ou-OOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUCH~!!!

JH: OH MY GOD! Onikage just took Madrox’s head off with an over the top rope suicide dive lariat and sent both of them squashing the other four men to the floor!

CL: God damn that psychopathic masked ass hole!

JH: All six men are down ladies and gentlemen! It is any one’s ball game now!

CM: I think that’s the first time I’ve ever seen that back stabbing bastard soar through the air! And as much as I’d hate to admit it, it was smart thinking by Onikage, he used Sean’s body to further cushion the fall besides the guys below them.

Tony Clarke slides out of the ring and carefully steps around the mangled and twisted, and tied up bodies that look like they’ve just been put through Hell, and the first one to get to his feet, standing over all the bodies is none other than the causer of it all. Onikage stumbles and staggers and ends up falling against the steel fencing barricade as he looks over his shoulder at the carnage his actions resulted in, though he doesn’t seem to heart broken over it all happening, that is until the stack of bodies starts to rumble. Out from under all of them, like some thing out of a horror movie, bursts up Samael as he roars out in pure rage, his eyes popping out of his head as his head darts around, his eyes falling on Onikage, he storms right out of the sea of bodies. Though he is met with a European uppercut for his troubles from Onikage before the masked oddity slips back under the bottom rope, Samael right behind him as Sean slowly starts to stir as well, while the other three all look completely out of it.

CL: Woo! Okay, now that was awesomely scary in a kind of super human monster from a B-horror flick sort of way!

JH: Samael seems utterly determined to prove his worth here tonight.

CM: Can’t blame the guy, before tonight I just thought he was some guy that beat on old people with mullets.

JH: How charming of you to do your research on Samael’s career.

CM: Meh, screw you too Bitchen.

CL: Guys, guys, we are missing the beauty of this situation, Onikage’s gonna get his ass kicked!

Onikage creates some distance between Samael and him with a slight limp in his step, though the monster is right behind him and only a few seconds away, cornering the smaller man against the turnbuckle, though once Samael is within arm’s reach a grin spreads across the masked man’s lips. Before the giant can react the Straight Edge Savior wraps his ankles and feet around Samael’s near ankle, twisting it and sending himself dropping to the mat as Samael goes face first into the top turnbuckle from the drop toe hold! In a dazed like state Samael only manages to turn himself around and sit down in the corner before his body gives way, causing him to lean against the bottom buckle, slowly Onikage gets to his feet. He flings his head back, whipping his long black locks out of his masked face as he places the side of his boot against the bigger man’s face, violently scraping across Samael’s face repeatedly with a face wash.

JH: Well, I suppose Onikage made the old saying hold true, the brain is mightier than brawn.

CL: Yeah, that or Samael is a wrestler that lacks any kind of workrate and is blowing up.

CM: Kayfabe Conse, kayfabe.

CL: Fuck you and your grape flavored kayfabe, bitch!

JH: Oi…

CM: Do I need to instill the fear of a true God in you?

After he is done giving Samael a nasty looking face wash, Onikage bounds from the corner to the corner on the other side, bouncing off of the ropes and running back towards the original corner, though is stopped in mid-run from a springboard spinning leg lariat from Madrox! Sean kips up to his feet to a resounding amount of jeers and just smirks as he looks down at Onikage, brushing his shoulder clean before turning his attention to Samael, closing off the corner so the bigger man can’t escape as he grabs a hold of him and with quite a bit of effort starts to get him back up to his feet. Clarke attempts to tell Mr. Phenomenal that there can only be two people in the ring at a time but Madrox just blows him off as ducks his head under Samael’s armpit and groans and growl as he tries to lift him into the air. Looking like he is just about to pop a blood vein in his forehead Sean manages to get Samael up high enough to perch him on top of the turnbuckle, he quickly scales up it and wraps his arm around the monster’s head in a front chancery, smirking smugly out at the crowd.

CL: Oh great, what is Floppity Flippity McFlyagully gonna go for now, some three thousand degree spinning boob driver of death?

CM: Mmmhmmm…Boobies…

JH: It’s like sitting next to two twelve year olds, I swear…

CM: Did you say some thing, Bitchen?

JH: Nothing, just curious to see what Sean might be pulling out now.

CL: That better be all or I’m gonna have to keep my pimp hand strong on you.

Madrox is caught off guard by a sudden swing to the kidneys from the bigger man, shaking the cruiserweight as he groans and clenches his teeth, tightening the front chancery on the Monster of FIW, though this only seems to bring about another slug to the kidneys from Samael. A hiss seeps out from Sean as he quickly peppers Samael’s head with a few punches with his free hand, though as he does Samael starts hammering over and over Madrox’s kidneys, resulting in Sean driving a stiff elbow down onto the spinal chord area of Samael’s back. That stops all the protesting in a hurry and Madrox reapplies the front face lock to tighten it even more, to avoid any problems like that happening again as he starts into dangerous regions, climbing up onto the top of the turnbuckle. Carefully he stays on top of it as he pulls Samael up slowly to his feet on the top of the turnbuckle too, the fans growing eerily silent, suddenly Sean bends down a bit and leaps into the air, bringing Samael along with him.

CM: It’s the Ou-

JH: No! Look!

CL: Damn it all to fucking Hades!

Before either man is too far into the air Onikage races across the ring, shoving both of them forward to him and to the right for them, sending them flying straight off of the turnbuckle and to the outside as the crowd gasps in horror! Sean lands the back of the skull first against the steel steps as the rest of his body hits the ringside floor with a splat, Samael on the other hand isn’t quite as lucky as he lands face first onto the ringside floor! From the sheer impact of the fall Samael’s head disturbingly jerks upward and blood squirts out of his newly bloody lips, shooting and covering up to three feet above his head, many of the female front row fans screaming in fright at this scene as Onikage looks out from the inside. With his back turned, Onikage is unaware of the fact that Prime has just slid inside of the ring and is eagerly standing a few feet behind him, waiting for him to turn around, mean while Tony Clarke leaps from the ring, checking on Sean and Samael.

JH: Dear lord! First Graver, now Sean and Samael! Onikage is becoming the kiss of death of these multi-man matches!

CM: Seriously, the bastard could’ve just re-injured Samael and Sean has to be in serious pai-

CL: WOO! WOO! BLOOD! YES! OH FUCK YES! OH SWEET FUCKING LORD TIER YES! WOO!

CM: Ahem, you interrupted m-

CL: LOOK AT IT! JUST FUCKING LOOK AT IT! OH FUCK YEAH! THAT IS BEAU-FUCKING-TIFUL!

JH: Trust me parents watching when I say, no matter what he sounds like, our co-worker is not having an orgasm and is just as worried about those two’s safety as the rest of us.

The fans are going nuts over the fall that just happened as Onikage turns around and is greeted by a lariat attempt from Prime, though the Straight Edge Savior ducks the big man’s try and spins him around and tries to greet him back with a forearm but the larger man bats it aside. Onikage thinking fast grabs a hold of Prime and whips him towards the ropes; however at the last second the big guy reverses it and sends Onikage towards the ropes, and suddenly to a cheer from the crowd JJ races from backstage with a steel chair in hand! He hops up onto the apron and looks ready to whack his former mentor silly as he rears back, and he swings for the fences, only for at the last possible second Onikage to reverse the whip as well! With a smack Prime’s head collides with the steel chair and JJ’s eyes widen as Onikage smirks, JJ goes to swing again at Onikage but the masked man ducks it just as Tony Clarke is turning around, JJ quickly drops down to avoid being noticed and Onikage taking his chance locks in For Whom the Bell Tolls on Prime!

JH: JJ attempted to screw Onikage out of the match but it seems to have backfired!

CL: Crap! Can’t that runt do any thing right?!

CM: Shit, shit, shit! Don’t tap out Prime, don’t tap out!

CL: Damn right he better not tap out!

JH: This very well could be the end though fellas!

CM: Don’t jinx it like that damn it!

One of FIW’s former World Champions squirms and wiggles in Onikage’s clutches but steadily and slowly loses more and more energy as he is held in the submission, Tony Clarke slides into the ring and races over to the two wrestlers’ side to make sure he is there in case of tap out. Behind Tony Clarke’s back Matt Impact and Grant Rice both slide back into the ring, both trying to still shake the cobwebs out when they look up and notice the incident going on at the other side of the ring. Grant gets up to his feet and charges while Matt scrambles across the ring, still too out of it to get to his feet, in mid-run Rice throws up his leg, looking for another Yakuza kick, aiming directly for Oni’s head. Suddenly Prime just can’t hold back any more and taps as Tony whips around and calls for the bell, at the last split second Onikage releases the hold and throws Prime in the way of the UZI from Grant, sliding out of the ring as Matt tries to grab a hold of him!


[align=center]DING DING DING~!!![/align]


CL: Oh fuck you Tony Clarke, fuck you!

JH: Onikage has earned himself a contendership for the Undisputed International Championship!

CM: Wait a second, isn’t Xtreme Kitten the International Champ?

CL: Yeah, the fucker is.

CM: Oh shit! He’s in no shape to defend his belt in the state Kennedy left him in!

JH: Well perhaps they’ll wait till his healed, but the bigger story is, Onikage verse Xtreme Kitten folks! Two former allies, two men we never thought we’d see in the same ring again, let alone against each other, the Ordinary!


MA: Here is your winner via submission and winner of a title shot to be used at any time for the Undisputed International Championship….OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE~!!!


”Counterfeit God” blasts over the sound system as Onikage starts back tracking from the ring, a grin on his face for only a few moments until shock over takes it when JJ tries to swing at him again, though he dodges it. Inside the ring Grant looks between the fallen Prime and Onikage with annoyance as Matt glares out of the ring at the masked freak that just picked up the win. On the other side of the ringside area EMTs and officials are still checking on Samael and Sean. The Straight Edge Savior just continues to grin as he backs up towards the entrance way, throwing his arms up in the straight edge X as he looks at the camera the camera man closest to him is holding up, mouthing the words “I’m coming for you” to whom one can only assume is the champion and his former best friend.

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Copyright 2006, FIW and Sporkco. Studios[/align]
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