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| ReVolt; 11-02-07 | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Nov 3 2007, 03:14 AM (418 Views) | |
| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:14 AM Post #1 |
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[align=center]The bass The rock The mic The treble I like my coffee black just like my metal With the bass The rock The mic The treble I like my coffee black just like my metal 'cuz I can't wait for you to knock me up In a minute, minute In a fuckin' minute I can't wait for you to knock me up In a minute, minute In a second I can't wait for you to shut me up and make me Hit my BADASS I can't wait for you to shut me up SHUT. IT. UP. I can't wait for you to shut me up and make me Hit my BADASS I can't wait for you to shut me up SHUT. IT. UP. la la la oo~oh la la la oo~oh la la la oo~oh The bass The rock The mic The treble I like my coffee black just like my metal With the bass The rock The mic The treble I like my coffee black just like my metal 'cuz I can't wait for you to knock me up In a minute, minute In a fuckin' minute I can't wait for you to knock me up In a minute, minute In a second I can't wait for you to shut me up and make me Hit my BADASS I can't wait for you to shut me up SHUT. IT. UP. I can't wait for you to shut me up and make me Hit my BADASS I can't wait for you to shut me up SHUT. IT. UP. I don't find it funny right now Right now I want my m-m-m-money right now Now I'm on my way to the party right now Right now I don't find it funny right now Right now I want my m-m-m-money right now Now I'm on my way to the party right now Right now Because the break The break THE BREAK I can't wait for you to shut me up and make me Hit my BADASS I can't wait for you to shut me up SHUT. IT. UP. I can't wait for you to shut me up and make me Hit my BADASS I can't wait for you to shut me up SHUT. IT. UP.[/align] [align=center] Copyright 2007, Full Intensity Wrestling in associate with Sporkco. Studios[/align] |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:35 AM Post #2 |
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JH: To kick things off tonight we have one of the best openers you’ll find on a wrestling card. Ten of FIW’s toughest stars will take part in a tag team gauntlet, featuring veteran teams like The Rejects and Hardcore Sex as well as some lesser experienced teams, who despite not being established pairings, are extremely talented individuals in their own right. CM: Wait… so the Tanaka Zaibatsu isn’t in this? JH: Well, no, they’re defending the tag team belts after this. CM: YAWN! Folks, this might be a good time to grab a grilled cheese sandwich, or if you’re a happening young dude like myself, some caviar and a fine white wine. CL: You idiot, sit right down and do your damn job. JH: While the champions may not be in this one, the winner of this gauntlet will be the number one contenders for a title shot somewhere down the line! Believe me, Chip, there is a lot on the line in this match! CM: Oh, wow, the number one contenders. A bunch of teams fighting for the chance to MAYBE win the titles. JH: Well, not every match can have gold as the goal, Chip. CM: They SHOULD! At the next Board of Directors meeting I’m going to suggest creating ten more belts so every week we can see nothing but championship bouts. We could have the Perfect Haircut Championship, the Most Well-Dressed Championship, the Biggest Boobs Championship… Jamie Lee will be a shoe-in, for sure… CL: You’re the biggest boob I see around here, asshole. MA: Ladies and gentlemen… the following match is a tag team gauntlet to decide the number one contenders for the FIW Tag Team Championship… introducing first… weighing in at 232 pounds… from Hull, England… 100% JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY BAAAAAAAAIIIIIIN!!! [align=center]As the music starts White flashing lights pan from left to right alternatively to the Riff. “I’m not asking for much” appears on the Screens, Fans become more vocal and a “Bain” chant can be heard. “I’m not asking for anything” scrolls across the screen the Music gets loader and just as the Song Kicks in 100% Jay Bain walks into sight through the curtains. Hundreds of White lasers spiral down on Jay Bain and then randomly scan across the fans. Bain psyched up waves his hands up and down beckoning the crowd to be loud and stand up as in to share this moment, he then paces to the ring with his head down displaying an excited look upon his face and slapping extended hands from the crowd, on approaching the ring he begins to take his Grey T-shirt off saying "If I don't kick out on 2...Check for a pulse", a few women cheer and even a few men, then he graps in his right hand, turns to his right and throws it into the crowd were a few hands fight for the Shirt, Bain lets out a huge sigh, takes in the sights,as he calms himself he is reminded how lucky he is to have this chance by the fans now being more supportive as they know who Jay is abit more before leaping right foot first onto the apron followed by the left, as soon as both feet are there he turns 180 degrees in a fluid motion and places the left foot threw the ropes to the mat, bends over and follows with the right. White lights pulse on and off another collection of lasers flicker onto Bain as he Stretches his arms while leaping up and down while turning around in a circle moving to the centre of the ring while looking at the fans, Awaiting the match he then leans against the ropes waiting for the bell. Bain Notices a few Bain crowd signs with His name on and the Bain Chant begins to fade down[/align] JH: One of the bright young stars in this promotion, Jay Bain is certainly one to watch. CM: Do I have to? CL: Hey, the kid came damn close to winning the contendership key for the Fighting Spirit Championship last week, and anyone who shows the kind of toughness he did in that Haunted House deserves a fair shot in my book. [align=center]It's coming up It's coming up It's coming up It's coming up It's DARE It's DARE[/align] This quick introduction can only mean one things as Roxie Galanoochie takes to the stage. Forgoing the pleasantries of a dance, Roxie walks down the stairs and starts off towards the ring. Blue and white strobes enshrine her as she ignores all calls from the fans whether they be the verbal cat call or the extended hand for a hand slap. Such an unpleasant actions seems funny to her as she smiles. [align=center] that's what you do it baby Hold it down there Jump with them all and move it Jump back and forth It feels like you were there yourself work it out [/align] MA: And his partner… from New York, New York, weighing in at one hundred and twenty three pounds…ROXIEEEEEEEEEE…GAAAAAALAAAANOOOOCHIEEEEEEEEEEeee!!!!!!!!!!!! Roxie reaches up grabbing hold of the middle rope and places her left knee up on the apron before pushing up on the right foot to get the other knee up there as well. Up on the apron, Roxie releases the middle rope and slides her head under it as her right knee joins in as well. Roxie remains straddling the bottom rope to take the moment to laugh out at the fans wanting to see her fall once again. Roxie lifts in her left leg and crawls around for a few seconds along the ropes before using the corner turnbuckle to pull herself up first to her knees. Roxie takes another moment to look through the crowd a smile etched on her face until she suddenly spins around, kicks out her legs, and takes a seated position in the corner. [align=center] It's coming up It's coming up It's DARE Never did no harm Never did no harm[/align] Roxie remains seated for a moment bobbing her head along with the beat until finally pulling herself up to her feet using the top rope. It’s a slow movement that gives a mighty fine arch in her favour. So mighty in fact that when she releases the rope and rears forward the momentum buildup is enough to get in a decent cartwheel that Roxie ends by shooting both arms in the air, fists clenched, letting out a refreshing smile of self approving accomplishment. It’s then that the music fades out and lights resume to normal velocity. CM: That bitch is crazy. I ain’t her baby’s daddy. JH: Roxie Galanoochie certainly has some bad wiring in her brain, but she’s never made a claim so desperate and ludicrous as having spent one evening with you, Chip. CL: Yeah, she’s a little nuts, but she’s not stupid. Frankly, Jay’s got an advantage in this thing having Roxie on his side. CM: Yeah, not only does he have her on his side, he gets to have her under him after the show. CL: Jealous much? MA: And their opponents... weighing in at 263 pounds… from Reading, England… THE KOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPAMAAAAAAAANIAC… ASH! KOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPAAAAAAAA! The PA system kicks into life as the opening chords of "Start Me Up" by The Rolling Stones echoes across the arena. Rising to their feet, the fans turn their attention toward the stage as the house lights turn to a bright shade of red. After a few seconds, 'The KoopaManiac' Ash Koopa steps through the gateway onto the stage playing in tune with the music on his air guitar. Reaching the edge of the stage, Ash pauses for a second and looks around the arena, then quickly makes his way down the steps whilst pointing out at the fans. Singing along with the lyrics of his entrance theme, Ash strolls along the aisle and slaps hands with the fans on either side as he makes his way toward the ringside area. As he reaches the ring, Ash veers left and begins scanning the crowd, before removing his headband and placing it on the head of a child in the front row. Quickly bounding up the steps, Ash makes his way along the apron and ducks down to enter the ring between the top and middle ropes. Facing the main camera, Ash steps up to the ropes and begins posing for the fans, then fires off a thumbs up, before turning and stretching against the ropes as he waits for the match to begin. JH: Ash Koopa was mercilessly beaten not too long ago by The Rejects after he failed to defeat Crackerjack last week. One can only imagine what he hopes to do if he succeeds in getting his hands on them tonight. CL: That’s assuming he survives in this match to get to that point. And even if that happens, he’s one man against an entire stable of some of the toughest, baddest, most awesome guys FIW has ever seen. JH: That’s not entirely true, Constance, because he’s being joined by another man that has a bone to pick with The Rejects… and that’s… The guitars of “Alive And Kicking” blast over the PA system as the crowd stir and stare toward the stage… [align=center]I'm Stronger Now Even After Everything That You Did Still Alive And Kicking I'm Better Now, I'm Awake Now I Can See, Everything In Front Of Me (Now)[/align] …The crowd roar as Elrick appears on the entrance stage, he raises his arms. Elrick then walks towards the ring, he high fives some fans hands as they cheer and some rock out to “Alive And Kicking” stopping half way he points up towards the rafters signaling respect for his father. He gets to the ring and climbs up to the apron, turning back to the fans where he shouts some sort of quote, getting the fans buzzing. He then climbs in the ring and awaits the match to get underway. MA: His partner… weighing in at 268 pounds… from Leamington Spa, England… ELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIICK!!! JH: To call Elrick’s grudge against The Reject Crackerjack intense is an understatement! These last couple of weeks, these two men have been out to kill each other, even brawling all over the arena and interrupting several matches with their brutal attacks on one another! CL: And if Crackerjack comes down with the other Rejects tonight, I predict Elrick will have a hard time staying focused on the business in the ring. It’s the sort of distraction that may ultimately mean the downfall of Team England. CM: You mean other than the fact they’re from England? JH: Chip, I personally am proud to have my country represented by two impressive wrestlers such as Ash Koopa and Elrick. CM: You three are the biggest over-hyped disappointments to come across the pond, right up there with David Beckham, who wishes he was half as stylish as me. Posh Spice should be with me, damn it! CL: Jealous much? CM: Stop saying that! [align=center]DING DING DING![/align] As we start things off, Ash Koopa and Roxie are in the ring while their partners take their places on the apron. They start to circle each other as Richard Kelly backs off to an empty corner to wait and watch. Ash is a little more cautious as he stares Roxie down while Roxie is practically flying on her feet, clearly geared up for some violence. Eventually they meet in the middle of the ring and lock up. With surprising force, Roxie gains momentum and pushes Ash into the far corner. She stands up on the bottom rope as he applies a blatant choke on her opponent. Kelly rushes in, calling for the clean break. Roxie reluctantly steps down and pulls away… but not before hitting an overhand chop to Ash’s chest, sending an echo throughout the arena! JH: Roxie respecting the clean break, but not before hitting Ash Koopa with a cheap shot! CM: Hey, she was just giving him a “love tap” to try and get inside his head! CL: Judging by what Roxie has done in the past, Ash is lucky if that’s ALL she gets away with tonight. Circling each other again, Roxie lunges forward and grapples with Ash before spinning around him, slipping her arms around her waist. Ash resists, however, grabbing her hands at the wrist and pulling them apart, breaking the hold. He then lets go and gets behind her, putting her into a full nelson hold. She makes it out, but Ash hits her with an arm drag and then, while she is on the ground, pulls her into a sitting position. He drives a knee into her back as he pulls her head back at the chin. JH: Ash applying that reverse chin-lock onto Galanoochie… It’s not intended to do anything other than work Roxie over, however, so Ash eventually releases and starts working the crowd. Roxie, clearly upset that she is not the one taunting her opponent, is quickly back to her feet. She runs toward Ash, but stops when Ash turns and sees her coming. Now she holds up a hand in the air, calling for a test of strength. Ash, letting out a chuckle, flexes his muscles and receives cheers from the fans. Coming over, he agrees, slipping into the Greco-Roman knuckle-lock. Roxie, however, almost immediately lets go, drops to her knees and pulls Ash’s feet out from under him. Dazed, Ash is helpless as Roxie slaps on a traditional headlock. With her free hand, she claws at Ash’s eyes when Richard Kelly cannot see. JH: Roxie is merciless as she seems not at all concerned about bending the rules a bit in order to inflict pain on her opponent! CM: Hey, she’s just doing whatever it takes to win? CL: You fucking moron, she doesn’t care about winning, just about tormenting whoever she is fighting! After having her fill of scraping Ash’s eyes with her nails, Roxie picks him up by his thin blonde hair and whips him into the ropes. As he rebounds, Roxie meets his jaw with a running elbow strike that has Ash back on the mat. Roxie is a little slower getting back to her feet, though, so when she does stand, Ash just happens to be ready for a rear grapple. Roxie looks side to side as Ash picks her up and drops her onto his stretched out knee! JH: An old but still effective move, the Atomic Drop, well-executed by the Koopamaniac! CM: I thought the point of that move was to knee the guy in the beans… but she doesn’t have any beans! CL: Neither do you, Chip, but I’ll gladly do that move to you and you can tell me if it hurts or not. Ash starts working the audience again as Roxie recovers and runs off the ropes. Jumping up, she wraps her legs around Ash’s neck and brings him down with a Hurricanrana. Ash rubs his head as Roxie goes to grab his arms, but Ash pushes back and sends Roxie staggering. Getting back up, he locks her into a front grapple, driving her against a turnbuckle. Roxie grabs the top ropes and Richard Kelly steps in, calling for a clean break. Ash, remembering earlier, pays back the chop from before with a soft slap across Roxie’s left cheek. It’s not a call-the-cops-the-rednneck-is-beating-his-wife-slap, but the kind you would give a misbehaving child. Although they might not be smart enough to know the difference, the fans roar with applause. Roxie, however, does not appreciate the difference at all, and after gingerly touching her face, pounces onto Ash, applies a front facelock in mid air and swings herself round and falls backwards, thunderously colliding with the mat and deliver a sickening DDT that shakes the mat and bounces Ash’s head off the canvas like rubber! JH: Sweet mother mercy, what a jumping swinging DDT from Roxie! She did not take kindly to receiving some of her own medicine in the least! CM: Well, that’s what Ash gets for hitting a girl. JH: Oh, please, Chip! That slap was mild in comparison to what Roxie has been doing! CL: If he’s serious about this, Ash will be just as ruthless and harsh as Roxie is, which is no easy task. JH: That’s not really how the Koopamaniac operates, Constance, but I still have faith in my fellow Brits! Roxie is about to follow through, lost in her rage, when she spots Jay asking for a tag. Oddly enough, the fiery vixen seems to cool down enough to agree, walking over and slapping hands, signaling the exchange of partners. JH: For some reason, Roxie seems to return to an even keel when she’s around Jay Bain, and it may bring this match back to a more balanced pace. As Bain enters the ring, Ash shakes the cobwebs loose and crawls over to his corner, tagging in Elrick. The blonde-haired British two-time tag team champion saunters in, sizing up the opposition. Not one to waste time, Jay fires forward with a forearm strike right into Elrick’s mouth. Running his fingers over his lips, Elrick shoots a look at Jay like “Did you just seriously do that…?” A forearm strike of his own connects with Jay’s head, but Bain hits another one, prompting the same from Elrick. They go back and forth like this for several strikes, the crowd getting fired up with each blow. JH: Elrick trying to show he’s the alpha male in this contest, but Jay Bain is having none of it! He’s going toe-to-toe with one of the toughest men on the roster! CM: I still don’t see what Roxie sees in him. CL: Perhaps it’s his desire to do the best that he can, to stand against all unwarranted cruelty and to be an upstanding person of honor in a depraved and often unforgiving industry. CM: I hate this kid. CL: Yeah, I’m not too fond of him either. Jay slams on the brakes with a European uppercut that puts Elrick on the recoil. Moving in, Jay puts his hands around Elrick’s neck and uses it for leverage as he jams his right knee into Elrick’s sternum once, twice, three times. As Elrick bows down, Jay sidesteps and hits a side thrust kick that lands on Elrick’s jawline. Elrick falls backward, flat on his back. JH: Shuffle side kick leaves Elrick down on the ground! Can Jay Bain follow up? Bouncing off the ropes, Jay raises an arm, putting his right fist behind his head. He then drops down, bringing his elbow onto the left arm of Elrick! JH: Slingshot elbow drop! Jay isn’t letting up for a second now that he’s managed to score the upper hand! No, he isn’t, and as soon as he as he stops moving, he’s down on the mat, taking Elrick’s left arm into his hands. He drops down, perpendicular to Elrick, holding Elrick’s wrist and squeezing the arm between his thighs. JH: Crucifix armbar by 100% Jay Bain. I’m not sure Elrick can escape this. This could be a huge upset… CM: I’m 100% sure it won’t be. Elrick, being no stranger to the legendary juji-gatame, wiggles free enough so he can he can get up on his knees. Jay refuses to release, however, pulling as hard as he can to hyperextend the arm. Gradually, Elrick gets to his feet, though clearly in great pain. Jay’s legs rest on the right side of Elrick’s head, keeping him from falling over since he’s practically upside down. Gravity is working against him but also with him, since his entire weight is now pulling down on Elrick’s arm. Seeing an opportunity, Elrick puts his strength into thumping Jay’s head and neck against the canvas, pounding the parasite hanging off him like someone attempting to scrape something nasty off the sole of their shoe. JH: My God! It’s like something out of a mixed martial arts match out here! Sakuraba and Gracie have nothing on these two guys! CM: Who? CL: It doesn’t matter. All that ultimate fighting stuff is fake anyway. In the battle of endurance, it’s Jay who gives in and lets go. Elrick slumps against a turnbuckle, nursing his arm, gritting his teeth and wincing. On the other end, Jay appears to have had his brains scrambled thoroughly. Jay is up to one knee when he turns around and sees Elrick charging forward with a stiff lariat – thankfully using his right, so far undamaged arm. Jay is struck so hard he does a backflip and lands on his neck, adding further injury to that particular body part! CL: Now that was fucking sick! JH: Moves like that could potentially end a career! CM: Well, it has been awhile since Elrick killed a career. Considering it’s his nickname, he should start making up for lost time! Thankfully, Jay doesn’t appear crippled or anything, but both men are taking their time getting back up. Not wanting to get caught unprepared again, Jay makes a note to stand first and spots Elrick lifting himself up in an empty corner with his back toward Bain. Stamping a foot on the mat, Jay manages to get the fans clapping along with the beat. When the clapping hits a crescendo, Jay runs forward and drives his shoulder into the small of Elrick’s back, tackling him. Elrick falls forward, but he’s in the corner, so his face slams against the top of the turnbuckle! CL: Back Spear! Back Spear into the turnbuckle! Jesus Christ, these guys keep this sort of shit up, I might have to rethink my opinions of them. JH: There’s nothing good about what just happened, Constance! Elrick might have been broken open with that move! CL: Oh, God, I fucking hope so! Sorry, Conse, but Elrick is just in a whole lot of brain-numbing pain. His face is in his hands and he’s kicking and writhing just in front of the corner. Jay decides to take a risk and jumps up onto the middle rope and onto the top of the turnbuckle. He beckons to the fans for support and they give it to him. Ash Koopa, meanwhile, is doing his best to rally Elrick to tag him in. Jay pats his right leg, apparently signaling a diving leg drop. He bends down, leaps forward… and lands right on the knees of Elrick! Clutching his leg, Jay rolls around, feeling the effects of a gamble gone bad. CM: I would say taking that chance was about as stupid as backing the Rockies in the World Series. JH: Speaking of that, Chip, some guy named Luigi called and wanted to know when you were going to pay up. CM: Damn that Todd Helton… Elrick is still feeling the big hurt that was put on him moments ago, but he gathers enough willpower to continue his counterattack. Looking to the crowd, he points to the turnbuckle and then to Jay. He then picks up Jay by his hair, drags him to the corner and sits Jay down on the top turnbuckle. Placing his palms on Jay’s torso, Elrick lifts him up into a military press. He then lets go, letting Jay fall on his shoulders in a fireman’s carry. In one fluid motion, Elrick falls sideways, dropping Jay on his head and neck! CL: SMASHMOUTH DRIVAH~! JH: With his neck getting so beat up like that, Jay Bain will be lucky if he’s not 100% paralyzed! CM: Hey, he could end up like Stephen Hawking! He could come to the ring in a motorized wheelchair and cut promos with a robotic voice! “Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto! Domo! Domo!” As everyone is wrapped up in Elrick hitting his signature maneuver, they almost fail to notice a caramel-skinned man with spiked hair and Union Jack tights running down to the ring. He sneakily ducks down behind the apron, making sure no attention is brought to him – despite, of course, all the fans yelling at his presence.] JH: That’s Colbert Tottington! What’s he doing here? He’s not in this match and none of his fellow Rejects are out here yet! CM: He’s probably out here to lend a hand to Team England, being the jolly good chap that he is. You limeys like to stick together, right? JH: We all know that “Colbert” is about as authentically English as Madonna, Chip, and the bottom line is he has nothing to do with this match! Roxie is struggling to point out to Richard Kelly that Colbert has arrived, but RK has his hands full keeping up with Elrick and Jay. Ash is just as oblivious as everyone else, cheering on Elrick. Seemingly carried by a new wind, Elrick rises, scoops up Jay and locks him in a full nelson hold. He then lifts him up as if to suplex him, but Jay escapes and drops to his feet. He gets behind Elrick, grabs the back of Elrick’s head with one hand and jumps forward, driving Elrick’s face into the mat. CM: OUCH! You have to believe that smarts after Elrick kissed the turnbuckle. JH: We’ve seen Elrick come back from bigger odds than this! What concerns me is what Colbert is planning! Jay moves to follow through, going for another slingshot move off the ropes. However, as he hits them, Colbert reaches in from behind the apron and snatches Jay’s legs, pulling them out from under him. Jay’s face connects with the mat even more painfully than when Elrick got hit with the bulldog. Unfortunately for Jay, Richard Kelly was busy checking in on Elrick to see the interference. Colbert sneaks underneath the apron, his work done. JH: Jay Bain tripped up by Tottington! Why? Why?! CM: Obviously to eliminate the competition for The Rejects, Hitchen! Or maybe Colbert just doesn’t like Jay Bain! It doesn’t matter! CL: Of course it matters, fuckwad. Everything The Rejects do is genius stuff. Just because we don’t see the reasoning behind it at first doesn’t mean we should write it off. JH: I don’t see anything “genius” in what amounts to blatant cheating, Conse! Elrick comes to and sees Jay Bain lying face down on the mat. Not wasting any time, Elrick crawls over, sets himself up directly beside Jay and facing the same direction. He applies a half nelson with one arm and uses the other to pull Jay’s arm across his face, locking his own hands behind Jay’s neck. Elrick then arches his legs and back, bending Jay’s torso and neck upwards. CL: It’s the PAIN KILLAH! JH: This could be it… Letting out an animalistic shout, Elrick puts a little more muscle on it, bending back as far as he can in the bridging Cobra Clutch. Jay cannot take anymore and soon an open palm is slapping the mat. Richard Kelly calls for the bell to signify the elimination of Jay Bain and Roxie. [align=center]DING DING DING![/align] JH: That’s it! Jay Bain taps out to he Pain Killer! CM: Okay, great. So what’s the next match? CL: Weren’t you paying attention, dipshit? This is a gauntlet match. Team England has to face another team. CM: Oh, come on! Don’t we get a break? I want to get some popped corn! Roxie helps Jay out of the ring and toward the backstage area. Suddenly “The Devil’s Rejects” by Rob Zombie erupts over the PA system and six men in white hooded cloaks appear at the entrance. They begin making their way down to the ring as a group. Some of the fans stand in reserved apprehension at the sight of The Rejects, while most are not afraid to voice their abhorrence of FIW’s most despised stable. CL: All right, this is great. Hey, maybe you can ask The Rejects if they have any snacks for you, Chip. CM: Um, no thanks. I think I have an emergency package of Hot Pockets in here somewhere… JH: …Why is there a microwave on the announce table? CM: I keep it hidden nearby for situations such as this. Granted, the radiation does a number on the testicles, but it’s worth it for the convenience. CL: Shut up, you twit, you’re distracting me from what just made this match great. |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:36 AM Post #3 |
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As The Rejects hit the apron, Colbert comes back out from under the ring, wearing the same hooded outfit his companions are. He joins them at ringside as all of them remove their hoods, no one seemingly the wiser he was hiding there the whole time. Elrick and Ash Koopa stand on the bottom rope facing The Rejects, their faces red with anger, shouting what can be nicely described as colorful language. Ash is egging on the whole lot of them, but Elrick seems particularly concerned with Crackerjack. None of them offers a reply, save for Onikage, who just smiles slyly at the fruitless provocation. CL: These meatheads should know that it’ll take more than nasty words to break the focus of these guys. They can gnash their teeth all they like, but it’s going to take plenty of blood, sweet and more than a little cunning to even stand a chance against The Rejects. JH: After everything The Rejects have put Ash Koopa and Elrick through, I think their rage alone would be sufficient to extract vengeance on those twisted souls. CL: You would think that, wouldn’t you, Hitchen? Well, it takes more than heart and happy thoughts to win against the likes of Onikage and Graver. Eating your vitamins and saying your prayers may be what your favorites do, but The Rejects have been dominant because they are as powerful mentally as they are physically! Richard Kelly is doing all he can to get Ash Koopa and Elrick to back off so Graver and Kiyoshi can enter the ring, but he’s not having much success. The two Englishmen are ready to go to war and judging by the rabid fans calling for a blood, there is no way to dispel the tension so thick in the air. Eventually Kiyoshi jumps up on the apron to confront Elrick, but Elrick is fast to throw a stiff right hand into Kiyoshi’s left cheek. Kiyoshi recoils, but comes back with a shoulder block between the ropes. He quickly gets into the ring, but is soon double-teamed by both Elrick and Ash Koopa. They take the Japanese wrestling machine to his knees with a series of axe-handles of the back. Graver moves with lightning speed to rescue his comrade, running toward Ash Koopa, but Ash counters with a back body drop! Ash and Elrick then take Kiyoshi’s head in double front facelocks and hit a double DDT that plants Kiyoshi with a loud thud! JH: This arena is ready to be lit up as Ash and Elrick get the revenge they’ve wanted so badly on The Rejects! That ring is on fire with emotion! You’d better believe that these grudges are personal! The crowd is deafening as Ash picks up Kiyoshi and Elrick picks up Graver. Each man sends their opponent off the ropes, and as The Rejects return, they are each met with stiff clotheslines! Richard Kelly tries to restore order to this chaotic scene, finally getting Ash Koopa to back down, although the Koopamaniac still has some choice words for the entire Rejects stable. Graver crawls out of the ring, leaving Kiyoshi and Elrick to square off to start this part of the gauntlet. JH: An already great match will now become amazing as Kiyoshi’s judo-inspired style meets Elrick’s chain-wrestling smash mouth method! You can almost taste the sheer hatred burning these men up. CL: While Elrick certainly doesn’t like The Rejects, it’s Crackerjack who gets all the hate he can muster. And Kiyoshi doesn’t run on hate – he’s always been a professional who does what he needs to in order to get the job done. See, Hitchen, you don’t understand him at all, which is exactly why he joined up with Onikage and Graver in the first place! No one takes the time to really get these guys and fucking appreciate who they are! JH: I’ve always acknowledged Kiyoshi’s talent in the ring, but I can’t say I’ll ever appreciate what he and his fellow Rejects have done! Their crimes are, in my opinion, unforgivable! Kiyoshi and Elrick approach each other, coming face-to-face and soon they are forehead-to-forehead, staring each other down. Everyone is waiting for someone to make the first move and ultimately it is Kiyoshi, who rears back and headbutts Elrick. Elrick, rather unfazed, fires back with a headbutt of his own. And then another. And another! Elrick puts his right arm between Kiyoshi’s legs, reaches over Kiyoshi’s right shoulder with his other arm and then spins Kiyoshi onto his back. Elrick falls down on top of Kiyoshi, getting into a pinning position! Richard Kelly begins to count! [align=center]1! 2! KICK-OUT![/align] CM: He’s pulling the trigger way too early, if you ask me! JH: Keep in mind that as fired up as he is to face The Rejects, Elrick basically just had a match. The Rejects are coming into this one fresh! It should be Elrick’s credit that he even got the pin to two so early! CL: I give credit to his thick skull, not the man. Kiyoshi is back on his feet and he and Elrick are dishing it out, a flurry of chops, punches and forearms flying between them. It seems to be a competition of who can be more stiff than the other as Elrick corners Kiyoshi against the ropes. Elrick whips his opponent across the ring, looking to deliver a lariat on the rebound, but Kiyoshi ducks it and heads to his corner, where he tags in Graver. Graver jumps onto the top turnbuckle in his corner, soaring through the air with a cross body that hits Elrick in the back! He nips up immediately, sprints across the ring and knocks Ash off the apron with a running forearm smash! CL: That’s part of what makes Graver so great. He knows when to step in and he’s always ready to get his hands dirty. Graver gets on the bottom rope and stares out into the crowd as his fellow Rejects cheer for him. Onikage is the only one that seems a little wary. It’s easy to see why, as Elrick comes up from behind and nails Graver in the back. He grabs the Hardcore Fuckamaniac and shoves him against the turnbuckle so his back is facing the ring. Ash is back up on the apron now and Elrick makes the tag. He’s not ready to step out yet, though, and Elrick runs to the opposite corner, takes Kiyoshi out with a running clothesline, then runs back and kicks Graver in the back of the head with a Yakuza Kick! Graver slumps down, turning around so he is now facing the ring. This time both Ash and Elrick get a running start and jolt Graver’s head with a pair of knee lifts! CM: Graver wasn’t much to look at before, but after that, he’ll definitely need an extreme makeover! Perhaps two! CL: Please. Graver has woken up with worse hangovers than what that did to him. The FIW fans are firmly behind Team England as Elrick exits the ring. Graver is crawling to the center of the ring when Ash runs toward him, jumps and crushes Graver’s head with an Atomic Leg Drop. JH: The Ultimate Leg Drop of DOOM! Of course, a move done in homage to a person who has had a very strong influence on Ash Koopa… CM: Jesus? JH: Er, no, Chip. Someone, you could say, who had an influence on Ash Koopa’s appearance and style… CM: Anheuser-Busch? CL: Fucktard, that’s a company, not a person. CM: No, it’s a real person – Anheuser Busch, the great-grandfather of our current president and the running back for the New Orleans Saints. Ash gets Graver up, straddles Graver’s left leg, reaches over his left arm and locks in an abdominal stretch. As the Minister of Awesomecity gets questioned by Richard Kelly if he wants to give in, Crackerjack walks over to where Elrick is standing. The masked monster does nothing but stand there, but the Career Killer looks ready to flip his lid at any moment. For the moment, though, he keeps his attention on the match. JH: Looks like Crackerjack is trying to get under the skin of Elrick. CL: Under his skin? Crackerjack consumes Elrick all day and all night. Just being close to him is a huge distraction. JH: Let’s hope Elrick can keep his mind on being there for his partner. By now Graver has been released and is standing groggy before Ash. The Koopamaniac throws a left hand punch, a right hand punch, a left hand punch, a right hand punch, a left hand punch…. And he winds up for a big right hand. But as the punch comes, it is blocked by Graver. He follows through with a rake across the eyes, which gets a warning from Richard Kelly but nothing else. Graver keeps it up by grabbing Ash’s right wrist, pulls him closer and floors him with a stiff lariat. JH: Short-arm lariat by The Reject of The Rejects… Wait, what’s he doing now? He’s reaching into his shoes, silly. Graver pulls out a Sharpie and leans over Ash, writing “’80’S REJECT” in big black ink on Ash’s forehead. He then steps back, gets a running start and hits a kick that would make Pelé proud right into Ash’s temple. The crowd bursts into chants of “Olé! Olé! olé! olé!” as Graver hunches over, getting his breath back. CL: Think he got… The Point? JH: I believe he did, but it seems that Onikage is telling Graver it’s time to let Kiyoshi back in. Indeed he is, but either Graver doesn’t see it or doesn’t give a fuck because he’s right back on Ash. He lifts up Ash, applies a standing head scissors and hooks each of Ash’s arms behind his back. Lifting Ash in the air, Graver spins ninety degrees before landing the move in a sit-down position. He rolls Ash over and goes for the pin. CL: THE REJECT DRIVAH! JB: This could be the end of Team England… [align=center]1! 2! TH--KICK-OUT![/align] Graver shrugs but doesn’t seem particularly frustrated at not getting the pinfall. He gets up, puts his hands on his lips and moves toward Kiyoshi… but suddenly darts across the ring and punches Elrick so hard it knocks him off the apron. This one-handed knockdown isn’t the big news – it’s that Elrick falls right into the hands of Crackerjack, who was still hovering in the area. Elrick instantly starts throwing blows and Crackerjack joins in. There’s nothing scientific or remotely wrestling about what they’re doing; they’re just beating the hell out of each other. Crackerjack whips Elrick away from the ring and onto the barrier between ringside and the crowd. CL: Well, it had to happen… Elrick and Crackerjack are caught up in their own little mayhem. JH: But where does that leave Ash Koopa? In a pretty bad spot. He’s managed to crawl over to his team’s corner, but of course, Elrick has his hands full with brawling around the ring. Rubbing his head, Ash Koopa tries to dispel the stars he’s seeing, but it’s too little, too late. A refreshed Kiyoshi Nakahata is already upon him. He stomps away on Ash’s head before laying down on Ash’s chest, applying a chickenwing to Ash’s right arm and then using his free arm to push the radius bone of Ash’s arm into his face. JH: Crossface chickenwing by Kiyoshi! They’re really going after Ash Koopa’s head! He’s been dropped on it, had it kicked in, had it yanked, crushed and punched… There’s only so much one man can take! Luckily for Ash, he is close enough to the ropes to break the hold. Richard Kelly makes it to four before Kiyoshi grudgingly slides off. Ash scoots one elbow at a time to his corner… but finds no one there. Knowing he is beaten, his head falls. Kiyoshi, knowing what must be done but not particularly thrilled by it, grabs Ash by the boots and drags him to the middle of the mat. JH: Elrick has disappeared into the arena somewhere, battling his own demons in the form of Crackerjack. Ash Koopa is alone, all alone, and it doesn’t look like he’ll get out of this one. CL: The Rejects didn’t even have to work that hard to break this team up. Team England had a common goal but different motivations. Flipping Ash so he is lying face down, Kiyoshi mounts him and applies a standard sleeper hold. He rolls over and wraps his legs around Ash Koopa’s body. He cranks it deep, cutting off the blood going to Ash’s brain. The Koopamaniac stares vacantly at the ceiling… Richard Kelly asks him if he wants to tap. Ash Koopa mutters in the negative, prompting Kiyoshi to tighten the hold. Again RK wonders if Ash will submit, but again Ash shakes his head. Kiyoshi puts so much energy into crushing Ash’s neck that Ash’s head looks ready to pop. When Kelly asks Ash a third time, the Koopamaniac nods in the affirmative. Jerking his hand in the air, Kelly calls for the bell. [align=center]DING DING DING![/align] JH: Well, it was valiant effort, but Ash Koopa couldn’t defy the odds any longer. He tapped out to the Dojime Sleeper and Team England is eliminated. CM: YAY! It’s finally over! As Ash hits the road to the backstage area, the opening of “O Fortuna” begins to play throughout the arena. CM: OH COME ON! Drake Love and Prime come running out of the entrance as “O Fortuna” fades into “Prelude 12-21” by AFI. Drake Love goes right into the ring and tries to tackle Kiyoshi, but the judo expert stays on his feet and batters Drake’s back with closed fists. Prime, on the other hand, marches around the ring to where Graver is. The other Rejects intercept, however, and even Prime is not brazen enough to take on an entire group of guys alone. JH: Prime and Graver have some unfinished business to attend to. Prime has been repeatedly attacked by the Hardcore Fuckamaniac, who has used that cinder block covered in barbed wire multiple times on Prime’s leg. CL: Just taking out the opposition, Hitchen. Prime is an imposing man and one of the biggest names on the FIW roster. It only makes sense that The Rejects would have it in for him. JH: So savagely assaulting someone just because they’re a well-established person in the locker room is part of The Rejects’ strategy to gain acceptance? CL: No, Hitchen, it’s part of their strategy to prove they’re the most driven and determined men in the business today. If the fans want to acknowledge their greatness and genius along the way, fine, but I don’t think it’s ever really bothered The Rejects before if they don’t. Kiyoshi gains the upper hand on Drake, picks him up and slams him down with a traditional judo throw. He then takes both of Drake’s feet, crossing both legs over before tucking them under his armpits – the left leg under the Kiyoshi’s right armpit and vice versa – and then turns Drake face-down, stepping over Drake’s body. He leans back, bending Drake’s legs and back toward his head. JH: Cross-legged Boston crab! Drake may have proved the old idiom “fools rush in” by just rushing in there! Drake’s leg muscles prevail as he flings Kiyoshi off, however, and he rolls over. Kiyoshi once more goes for the legs, but Drake kicks him away. Another approach gets the same result. Kiyoshi jumps forward this time, plopping down on Drake’s chest and unleashing a barrage of punches into Drake’s face. He raises Drake by the head and slides an arm under Drake’s armpit, going for another judo throw, but Drake stops it. Kiyoshi puts the other arm across Drake’s chest and sweeps Drake’s leg, slamming Drake down on his back! JH: S! T! K! CM: Where the hell is that space tornado?! Did I miss it again? CL: Just shut up and eat your Hot Pocket. How is it? CM: Scalding hot on the outside and frozen solid in the center! Yum! CL: It smells like burnt hair in a bowl of refried curry… CM: It’s Philly Cheese Steak flavor! CL: I hope you have a toilet hidden around here somewhere, because you’re on the next train to Diarrhea Town. Drake dodges a knee drop by moving out of the way. With Kiyoshi down on one knee, Drake gets behind him and applies a full nelson. He bridges his back, lifting Kiyoshi over and onto his shoulders. Drake keeps his back arched and the hold in place, pinning the shoulders! Richard Kelly counts… [align=center]1! 2! TH—GRAVER BREAKS UP THE PIN![/align] The bearded drunkard catapulted himself over the ropes and onto the bridging pin with an elbow across Drake’s abdomen. Prime, seeing a chance to get at Graver, practically bounds into the fracas. He scoops up Graver, gets him in a full nelson, lifts him off the ground – and then lets go, letting Graver drop onto the mat! He then mounts Graver and, bunches of messy hair in place, starts slamming Graver’s head on the canvas. Kelly is reduced to the role of observer as Kiyoshi and Drake are both out of it, Graver is virtually unconscious and Prime is blinded by the red mist of rage. JH: GOOD SWEET CHRIST! Drake hit the Dragon Suplex, but Graver made the save! Now Prime is taking out all his pent-up frustration out on the cause of his agony, Graver! Kelly and Prime are the only cognizant individuals between the ropes! THIS IS MADNESS! CM: THIS IS SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sorry, couldn’t resist. Kiyoshi is back now and is coming to the rescue of Graver. Behind Prime, Kiyoshi pulls him off the rarely sober asshole, puts his head under the left arm, lifts him up using both his arms wrapped around Prime’s torso and falls backwards. Considering the massive size of Prime, the move is sloppily done and Prime does not so much land on his back as he does right where the neck meets the back of the head. CL: Now THAT was fully… fucking… sick! JH: THE DEVASTATION! Kiyoshi dead-lifted the 310 pound evolution of excellence and dropped him right on his head! After all this, where does Kiyoshi have the energy! Where does he have the strength! Yet somehow he remains Mr. FSC, the man who refuses to take the easy path! Graver, not entirely there, rolls out of the ring and retreats to his corner. Prime does the same. Amazingly, Kiyoshi still has some gas in the engine after that and returns to Drake, who is on his hands and knees. Kiyoshi applies an armbar, stepping over the arm with his inside leg, facing away from the Milehigh Madman. Kiyoshi keeps turning, diving forward over Drake, rolling onto his side. The barred arm serves as a lever, flipping Drake over Kiyoshi and onto his back. Kiyoshi hooks both legs and holds the pin as Kelly counts. [align=center]1! 2! TH—KICK-OUT![/align] JH: The arm wrench into an inside cradle isn’t enough to stop Drake! It may have seemed like a long time for The Rejects since they started wrestling, but they need to remember Primal Love is still very fresh in comparison! Sweat pouring down his face, Kiyoshi tries to lift Drake up, but Drake counters by grabbing Kiyoshi’s head and slamming it on to the top of his head in a jawbreaker. Drake further capitalizes by going back-to-back with Kiyoshi, reaching back and pulling his head over Drake’s shoulder, dropping to a sitting position and driving the back of Kiyoshi’s head onto his shoulder. Kiyoshi flops around like a carp out of water as Drake, panting, sits up. JH: Drake rocks Kiyoshi’s head from BOTH sides! That, along with the numbers Team England did on him, may be enough to secure advancement for Primal Love! CM: You mean there’s MORE after this?! Drake lifts Kiyoshi up and over his right shoulder, draping him across his back. He places Kiyoshi’s head under his left arm so Kiyoshi is bent into a circle. Taking a few quick steps, Drake falls to his butt, dropping Kiyoshi’s head on the mat! He lets go and covers! JH: DRAGON DRIVAH! DRAGON DRIVAH! CL: Kelly counts! [align=center]1! 2! TH—FOOT ON THE ROPES![/align] Kelly was about to land the last slap when he spotted it and clearly points it out to Drake, who is still not happy. Having vented his anger, Drake raises Kiyoshi, putting his head between his legs as if setting up for a powerbomb or piledriver. But before the move goes anywhere, Kiyoshi stands up, holding onto Drake’s legs so Drake is sitting backwards on his shoulders. Kiyoshi brings both hands down, throwing Drake down against the mat. CL: Water-wheel slam! JH: Instead of going for the pin, it looks like Kiyoshi is going to mix things up with a tag! Kiyoshi does indeed, sending Graver in. He does a running fist drop to the back of Drake’s head, but then something is said by Prime that grabs his attention. Intrigued, Graver stops what he is doing and motions for Prime to come in. He even whips Drake into Primal Love’s corner so Prime can slap Drake’s back and enter legally. JH: This is weird… Prime hasn’t been tagged into this match yet, but they’re still inviting him to come out and play! Graver even sent Prime’s partner over so Richard Kelly would let Prime come in and STAY in! CL: He’s not being courteous, Hitchen. Fuck that. Maybe he just wants to show Prime he’s better than him. Or, more likely, we have no idea what ace Graver has up his sleeve. Graver and Prime lock up. Prime gets Graver in a vertical suplex and seems to be going for some form of brainbuster variation, but comes up short when the self-destructive madman breaks free, landing on his feet behind the gargantuan bodybuilder. He gets a grip on Prime’s wrist and whisks him into an empty corner. After some tenderizing elbows to the head, Graver keeps a hold on Prime as he ascends to the top turnbuckle. As he stands on the top rope, Prime is facing him, bent over and perched on the bottom rope. Graver hooks his arms underneath Prime’s, jumps forward with Prime almost erect in the air. Graver lands square on his knees while Prime is not so lucky – his perfectly tanned Southern California features getting up close and personal with the canvas. CL: By the grace of Elune, that was a FUCKING AVALANCHE REJECT DRIVAH! Totally unexpected by Prime! JH: There’s no way Prime will be taken out of commission that fast… Regardless, Graver goes for the pin anyway. [align=center]1! 2! KICK-OUT![/align] Graver’s diving vertical double underhook facebuster was barely enough to get two, but it was enough to give Kiyoshi time to emerge from his corner and come on over! Graver gets Prime on his feet while Kiyoshi crouches behind him. Kiyoshi hits a leg sweep that knocks Prime’s support out from under him while Graver hits an uppercut that would make Little Mac from Punch Out! proud. CL: Now that’s what you call a fucking TANDEM MOVE! JH: Despite their efforts, though, Prime is still on his feet! Hard to believe, but it’s true. In fact, he’s not just still standing, he’s pissed. He grabs Graver by the neck and lifts him clean off the ground. Kiyoshi is about to save his partner, but before he can, Drake knocks him into next week with a spear followed by a front chancerie. He keeps Kiyoshi down while he jams knee after knee into Kiyoshi’s head. Kelly is doing his best to stop this, but he’s torn between the legal men going at it and the two illegal men taking up space in the ring. JH: Finally we get to see the big man in action. Things don’t look good for The Rejects! CL: That’s just what they WANT you to think, Hitchen. CM: Yeah! Just like the liberal media! Global warming is the best thing to ever happen to us! What have those polar bears done for us lately? What Prime is doing for Graver right now is a little something called the Shotgun. He whips Graver into the ropes, sets himself up for it and when Graver comes back, he gets nothing but a size whatever-the-fuck-huge-number Prime wears. As if Graver wasn’t already one ugly son of bastich, Prime puts some frosting on that mud pie by stomping on his face. CM: SHOTGUN! JH: My God, Chip, do you just call a move? CM: …Huh? Sorry, I was on my cell phone. A bunch of us are going to get cheap Caribbean prostitutes after the show and I want to sit up front so I can feel the air conditioner. It’s hotter than hell in the Domingo Republic! CL: …What the fuck did you just say? Anyway, it’s time for the full nelson submission as Prime puts it firmly on a wounded Graver. Prime even starts swinging back and forth, putting an extra hurt on the guy. Man, there must be a special on full nelsons tonight. Graver resorts to cheatery (he does that, you know) blindly kicking backwards until he connects with Prime’s beans. Richard Kelly does not see the low blow because he’s doing his best to pull Drake off Kiyoshi, who is now bleeding from his forehead after Drake has kneed a dent in it. RK is showing some stones and is getting up in Drake’s face. So much so that he fails to see Onikage getting near the ring and sliding something toward Graver. We soon realize what it is, for it is a familiar site in recent weeks – a cinder block wrapped in barbed wire. JH: I knew they couldn’t play an honest game! They had to go and get that damned cinder block involved again! Why can’t Graver fight fairly? CL: What makes you think those jerk-offs they’re fighting deserve a fair fight? The Rejects have never been treated fairly, so why should they do something they’ve never got from others? JH: Because it’s the right thing to do, damn it! As Hitchen and Constance argue the morality of pro-wrestling, Graver is throwing ethics to the wind and, spinning around, jabs the cinder block right into the same knee that he attacked before. Prime lets out a yelp, but it’s drowned out by the boos emanating throughout the arena. Besides, Drake is still giving back as much RK is giving him. No one is the wiser as Graver gets the cinder block back to his Reject stablemates and returns to the match. He shoves RK aside and shoves a middle finger right in the face of Drake, who then gets a Shining Meathook haymaker right in the mouth. Drake goes down and Graver picks up the bleeding, tortured Prime. He applies a three-quarter facelock and then falls to a seated position, forcing Prime’s jaw to drop down on Graver’s shoulder. Prime’s head bounces off it and he sprawls out. CL: BAM! CM: KICK IT UP A NOTCH! Is Emeril here? Emeril! I love you! Introduce me to Rachael Ray. CL: I swear to the snout of Anubis I will do to you what Leatherface did to teenagers. Graver goes in for the pin and Prime is in some serious pain. It doesn’t seem to be so much from the stunner he just got so much as from – I don’t know – the HUGE FUCKING GASH ON HIS KNEE. Richard Kelly doesn’t seem to notice, however, as he starts counting before Graver decides to punch him too. [align=center]1! 2! 3![/align] [align=center]DING DING DING![/align] |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:37 AM Post #4 |
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JH: Well, they did it through cheating, but The Rejects have beaten two tag teams now to survive this gauntlet. They still have one team to face, though, and that’s… Drake is screaming his head off at Richard Kelly as some ring rats help Prime limp toward the back, trying to stop the bleeding with make-shift bandages. Meanwhile, “Church of Hot Addiction” blares over the sound system. Steve “The Emo Kid” Patterson and “Fierce” Felix Arroyo sprint down the entrance and into the ring, wasting no time in bringing the fight to Graver and Kiyoshi! JH: HARDCORE SEX! It’s come down to Hardcore Sex and The Rejects in the gauntlet to decide the number one contenders for the tag team titles! The two established teams in this match are now facing off, and you have to believe that Hardcore Sex, being fresh, are going to have a distinct advantage over Graver and Kiyoshi, who just had to fight Team England and Primal Love to make it this far! CL: Yeah, right. They might as well just ring the bell and declare The Rejects the winners. Not only are Graver and Kiyoshi more skilled and more experienced stars than Hardcore Sex, they’re also a lot smarter. I mean, with the Savior of FIW in your corner, there’s no way you can lose. Kiyoshi is lying in a pool of his blood as Felix runs at Graver and nails a bulldog, driving the Fuckamaniac into the mat. Steve follows through with a diving leg drop off the top rope. Unlike The Rejects, Hardcore Sex have no problems getting right back to their feet after hitting their maneuvers. Kelly tells them they need to pick a legal man, so Steve volunteers and goes right back after Graver. JH: An interesting match-up here, because these two are quite similar in style. They are, in essence, both brawlers, relying on using their fists, heads, whatever they can to bash their opponent’s skull in. They also have a tendency for high-risk moves that pay off huge in the pain department – when they connect! Plus they’re no strangers to foreign objects… And on top of all that, they’re both pretty damn cynical, mean-spirited brooding loners! CL: What are you saying, Hitchen? JH: I’m saying Steve Patterson and Graver aren’t that different! In fact, I’d guess Steve would make a pretty convincing member of The Rejects! CL: Bite your tongue, Hitchen! Hardcore Sex aren’t anything like The Rejects! Hardcore Sex are clowns, jokes, little boys pretending to be championship material while The Rejects are proven champions leading promising young guys who just need a little polish. And if you say Graver and Patterson are alike again, tell me beforehand so I can get out of the way when Graver breaks a beer bottle over your head! Graver is an unapologetic renegade who does things his OWN way and doesn’t give a flying SHIT what people think. Steve Patterson just whines, bitches and cries all day, writing his lame poetry! They’re NOTHING alike! CM: Hey, is that the crybaby and the fag? Is this match still going on? I’ve heard those bells like five times already. Graver comes running at Steve for a shoulder block, but Steve stands his ground and takes it. Graver points to the ropes and tells him to take a shot and Steves does so, bouncing off the ropes. He slams on the brakes right before Graver drops to the ground, stretching out a leg to trip The Emo Kid. Steve just shakes his head and plants a stiff set of toes right into Graver’s beard region. As he flails around, Steve performs a backflip where he ends up with his right leg across Graver’s neck. The fans are unsure of how to react, but everyone loves some acrobatics, so there is a smattering of applause for Steve. This quickly dies down as Steve gets his knees kicked in by a resurgent Minister, who promptly slaps on a headlock followed by a series of forearm smashes, eye rakes and whatever else he can get away with without Kelly getting too much on his case. In an interesting but unorthodox bit of chain wrestling, Steve and Graver exchange holds where they do little more than pummel each other. Steve puts an end to it and goes off the ropes. Graver runs at him too, but he goes down while Steve goes up. They repeat but this time Steve jumps up, puts a flying headscissors onto Graver and turns it into a high speed arm and face buster. CL: Weight of the World on Graver! CM: Really? Poor guy shouldn’t be so hard on himself. All work and no play makes Gravey a dull boy! Steve goes for another standing moonsault, but comes up snake eyes when Graver rolls over and nips up. Forearms go boom, boom, boom on Steve’s emo cranium as he gets not only taken to the ropes but up and over them. He staggers to his feet, but Graver jumps on the middle rope and then the top, coming off with a flying fist that smacks Steve right between the eyes. Graver goes down like a wet sack of bricks, but Steve takes some time to fall over – enough time to yell “TIMBER!” anyway. JH: These fans are going crazy for this high-flying craziness! These guys are going to kill each other! Or kill themselves! More brawling on the outside as Richard Kelly begins the count-out. The Rejects, oddly enough, are not getting involved, but rather watching as Graver dukes it out with Steve and Kiyoshi bleeds on the apron. Steve takes control and drives Graver to the side of the ring Felix is standing on. Felix comes running along the narrow piece of ring, jumps and wraps his legs around Graver’s neck, taking him down with a flying headscissors. Steve gets taken out too, but he’s back up quick enough to re-enter the ring. Graver, however, gets caught up with a German suplex from Felix that delays him. Felix blows a kiss from across the ring at The Rejects, who – as always – don’t reply to simple provocation. Steve taunts for Graver to bring it on, but Graver instead chooses to tag out to Kiyoshi, who – despite looking even worse than Graver – dutifully enters the ring. At this moment, Felix explodes in his corner, becoming the most obnoxious sight you have ever seen as he flags Steve down. Steve nods and makes the tag, but not before running, jumping and planting a knee square in Kiyoshi’s womb… uterus… stomach. He then hits a rolling wheel kick that knocks Graver silly… sillier than usual. JH: Hardcore Sex has brought the hardcore to go toe-to-toe with The Rejects of The Rejects and now it’s time to see if they’ll last when they bring the sexy… against Mr. FSC himself! As Steve fights with Graver (just normal brawling, you’re not missing anything), Felix locks up with Kiyoshi. The hardcore homosexual pulls off a snap suplex, but Kiyoshi rolls with the impact and is actually up almost right away. He picks up Felix and, with a side slam, takes him to the ground. Kiyoshi first works the arms, pushing the white hair and blood out of his eyes. Felix manages to escape each hold, however, reversing it and applying it back to Kiyoshi: a jujigatame, a wakigatame, arm locks, face locks and so on. Felix then gets Kiyoshi in the Pelvis-to-Pelvis and is just about to get a nice session of dry humping stard when Kiyoshi breaks the pin and starts hitting Felix so hard you’d swear it was a shoot. But Felix just hits back until he has Kiyoshi’s arms pinned under his, so Kiyoshi is stuck face-to-face with The Fierce One.] CM: Oh, gross… Kids, don’t try this at home. Felix just raises his eyebrows once and everyone knows what’s coming next. Felix leans forward and PLANTS a large, sloppy kiss on Kiyoshi’s face. Of course, the judo master is doing all he can to pry free, but he’s just so drained of energy and blood he can’t muster an escape. The fans begin to chant: [align=center]“PLEASE DON’T DIE! PLEASE DON’T DIE! PLEASE DON’T DIE!”[/align] Kiyoshi looks about to pass out as he slumps into a sitting position on the mat. Richard Kelly comes over, not sure what to do about this kind of behavior – treat it like a submission or just break it up? Then again, they do make such a cute couple… Kelly takes a gamble and raises Kiyoshi’s hand once… it falls. He picks it up and raises it again… it falls. He picks it up one more time… and it stays up… in the form of a middle finger. Kiyoshi suddenly flings Felix off him and gets in the face of RK, apparently quite insulted. JH: I think Kiyoshi took exception to someone actually thinking he would submit to a kiss. It was just the fire needed under Kiyoshi’s ass to get back into this thing! CL: Eh, Kiyoshi would have murdered this fairy anyway. Kiyoshi hits a running front powerslam on Felix, picking him up and bringing him down like he belonged there. Then, we see something we rarely ever see – Kiyoshi going up top. He reaches the summit and, adding the unexpected to the unexpected, performs a flawless backflip that has him landing right on top of Felix in a splash position! JH: OH MY GOD! MOONSAULT! Kiyoshi just hit a perfect moonsault onto Felix! He’s staying on for the pin! [align=center]1! 2! KICK-OUT![/align] JH: And Hardcore Sex are still in this thing… Felix going back to pin in Steve… But Steve isn’t there. He’s on the other side of the apron, talking to The Rejects… most specifically Onikage. It doesn’t look like their discussion is too heated either, so much as a normal conversation. Felix just stares, mouth wide open, arms outstretched. He’s so shocked he doesn’t see Kiyoshi below him, putting his right arm up between Felix’s legs until he’s been pulled down and flat on his back! JH: School-boy roll up! [align=center]1! 2! 3!!![/align] [align=center]DING DING DING![/align] MA: Here are your winners… Graver and Kiyoshi Nakahata… THE REEEEEEEEEEEEEJEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECTS!!!! Richard Kelly lifts the arms of Graver and Kiyoshi, indicating them as the victors. Graver quickly snatches his hand back, while Kiyoshi goes through the motions like he’s expected. Steve and Felix, for their part, are having some angry words at an ending they didn’t see coming. CL: I hate to say I told you so, everyone… Wait, no I don’t. JH: Apparently Steve Patterson was too busy having some sort of dialogue with the self-proclaimed Light of FIW, Onikage, the co-leader of The Rejects… that he lost focus for just a little while. CM: And that’s all it took for them to go down! Graver and Kiyoshi came on a mission and fought through three teams and are now the contenders for the tag team titles! JH: But wait… It doesn’t look like this is over yet…. Steve and Felix are FURIOUS that they just blew their shot, despite coming in last in the gauntlet. As The Rejects celebrate on the outside, pumping their arms and congratulating Graver and Kiyoshi, Steve and Felix get a running start off the ropes… and dive through them on the other side, crashing into The Rejects, each man taking out three or four guys! JH: My God! Suicide dives from both members of Hardcore Sex, knocking down The Rejects like a bunch of bowling pins! Like men possessed, Steve and Felix fight their way despite the disadvantage in numbers. Felix knocks heads with Kiyoshi, Phyllis and Gabriel while Steve trades blows with Colbert and Graver. They fight to the back as security swarms out to try and break them up. JH: And just when you think you’ve seen enough tag team wrestling… the tag team champions, the Tanaka Zaibatsu, will take on Double R… NEXT! |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:38 AM Post #5 |
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MA: “The following bout is scheduled for one fall and is for the FIW Tag Team championship.” [align=center]I feel irrational So confrontational To tell the truth again I am getting away with murder it isn't possible to never tell the truth but the reality is I'm getting away with murder (Getting away, Getting away, Getting away)[/align] MA: “Introducing first….she is one half of the challenging team and is weighing in at 133 pounds. Making her way to the ring from Shelton, Connecticut……RORY VON DRACHENBERG!” The speakers burst with vibration as Rory Von D, makes her way out onto the stage to a crowd full of jeers. She stands on the stage for a few seconds before making her way down the few steps onto the walkway with one thing on her mind and that is ass kicking. She makes it to the ring and she slides right into the ring with her hands in the air as her music cuts down and she waits impatiently for her opponent. MA: “And her partner, from Portland, Oregon…..” As the beginnings of Doom begin to ooze through the speakers of the arena the lights quickly die down to nothing save for the quick, spaced-out flashes of white that fill the arena. Once the opening guitar strums and wheezes of audio fill the arena with still no sight or change of lighting, the camera zooms around the crowd watching as penlights, lighters and other sources of light begin to spark up from the crowd and staff attempting to break the darkness in their personal spaces – attempting to see anything below. Drums sound and pick up the pace. As they play, white lights along both sides of the walkway slowly pop up two-by-two down the row. Once they all light, they wait in the lower position only illuminating the walkway as if waiting for something… MA:”…weighing in this evening at 315 pounds…… ROBERT BLACK!” The sound sucks back into the speakers and then pounds back out in the form of the heavy guitars, drums and effects that create Doom by Nine Inch Nails. The lights on either side of the stage suddenly jerk up illuminating the entire walkway while two firework pyros on either side of the entrance explode setting of a chain reaction down both sides of the stage and a man emerges with amazing intensity from the curtain of the entrance. The man was Robert Black. With continued intensity he jumps and screams and interacts with the crowd as he moves down the walkway, attempting to fire them up in any way possible and the screams become so loud the music is barely heard. When he finally makes it to ringside a spotlight follows him as he works his way all the way around high-fiving, shaking the hands of and fist pounding with fans before finally climbing onto the ring edge and stepping over the top rope into the ring, where he continues his non-stop intensity as the music enters a heavy brooding rift. Now, two spotlights figure-eight the ring as he wanders looking at all the fans and climbing on each ring post and flexing. He then climbs onto a random ring rope to look out and scream a little more before moving back to center ring, taking his shirt off and throwing it out of the ring, and waiting for the match to start. JH: “Double R in the ring looking to turn a losing streak into FIW tag team championship gold tonight.” CM: “I doubt Diasuke and Mr. Blonde will even break a sweat tonight.” CL: “The experience of The Tanaka Zaibatsu will be a tough hurtle for the younger team of Double R.” Suddenly, Black Feather Orchestra’s, X hits the arena and the fans look to the ramp but find no sign of the tag team champions. Those in attendance decide to jeer the champions anyway even though they are unable to see them. Michael Anderson looks confused in the ring but decides to announce the duo anyway. MA: “Now coming to the…..” Anderson is brought to a halt as he glances to his left and Daisuke and Mr. Blonde have appeared from nowhere (probably the crowd) and are making a quick slide into the ring leaving the belts laying on the canvas as their music cuts out. CL: “DAISUKE AND MR. BLONDE OUT OF NOWHERE!” CM: “Just like I said they are prepared to make light work out of the team of Double R.” As the team of The Tanaka Zaibatsu slide into the ring they instantly go the beating on Robert Black and Rory Von D. Daisuke makes quick work of Rory by whipping her into the ropes, followed by a running forearm smash that connects just as she rebounds off the ropes. This sends Rory over the top, slamming her back into the ring apron and then her head smashing off the floor below taking her out of the match. Michaela Menendez pulls Daisuke toward his corner as he turns to move back to assist his partner but the wrestler is too much for the official as he tears away from her and charges across the ring where Mr. Blonde has done plenty of work to wear down Robert Black and is now holding him for an attack from Daisuke. That is exactly what Black gets as Daisuke catches him with a running knee cross that takes him off his feet and to his back on the canvas. Menendez now seizes control of the match shoving Daisuke back into the corner and gets him to climb out of the ring and to clutch his tag rope as she calls for the opening bell of this match. [align=center]DING DING[/align] CL: “What the fuck was the point of that? This match was over before it even started.” JH: “It’s too bad The Tanaka Zaibatsu have to rely on under handed tactics. Especially when facing a team they have a clear advantage over.” As the bell rings, Mr. Blonde heads over to his corner and slaps the hand of his tag partner and then utilizes what little time he has moving back to Robert Black and pulling him up to his knees and drops a couple elbows to his forehead. He then steps back as Daisuke charges at Black and leaps up with a Shining Triangle. Michaela who is preoccupied watching Daisuke forgets about Mr. Blonde who slides in with a Quiff Kick straight to the face of Black and drops both he and Daisuke to the mat. Michaela directs Mr. Blonde back to his corner and then twirls around to check on Robert Black who is out of it. She grabs his arm raising it into the air. As she releases it just falls back to the canvas and she begins to count. [align=center]…1[/align] She lifts his arm again and just like the last time it drops down to the mat. Daisuke continues to apply pressure even though he knows the match is well over and he seems to be enjoying torturing his opponent. [align=center]…2[/align] One last time she raises Black’s hand and releases it only for it to drop for the third and final time and she jumps to her feet calling for the bell as Daisuke releases the hold and climbs up to his feet as well. [align=center]DING DING DING[/align] CM: “Did I miss something? I was fixing my contact.” JH: “We get your point. It was a very quick and easy match for the Tanaka Zaibatsu.” Michaela hands the tag belts to Daisuke and Mr. Blonde and they drape them over their shoulders as the official raises their hands in victory. MA: “Here are your winners by submission and STILL FIW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS……” CL: “What do we have here?” JH: “It is called KARMA. The Tanaka Zaibatsu are getting a taste of their own medicine.” What the announcers are referring to is the presence of the Reject’s who are making their way to the ring led by Graver who stops at the bottom of the ramp and instructs; Colbert Tottington, Gabriel, and Phyllis Bathory into the ring after the tag team champions. All three men enter the ring behind the champions and Gabriel goes straight for Mr. Blonde as Colbert and Phyllis clothesline Daisuke from behind. Graver slides into the ring barking out orders as he does and calls to Gabriel first for an assault on Mr. Blonde who is attempting to fight off the sneak attack but is out numbered quickly as Phyllis grabs him from behind and allows Gabriel to boot him to the stomach. He then wraps his arm around the head of Mr. Blonde and drops him quickly to the canvas with a spike DDT. CL: “Penance by Gabriel and Mr. Blonde is hurt. That DDT was devastating.” All three members then move to Daisuke and take their turns booting and beating him down to the mat ensuring that he does not get up. Phyllis breaks away from the group and moves to a corner taking a knee pad off as Colbert picks up Daisuke and snap mares him back to the mat in the seat position. CM: “Bathory is going to finish him off.” Just behind the group with Mr. Blonde back on his feet, Graver is positioning him for his finisher as well as the group intends to deliver as much damage as possible. JH: “HARDCORE SEX!!!” CM: “Somebody suffer from turrets?” JH: “No there!” Hitchen points to the ramp as Steve Patterson and Felix Arroyo come sprinting to the ring. Both men slide in and go to work on the Reject members. Graver turns his attention from Mr. Blonde and drops him to the mat and focuses his attention now on the team of Hardcore Sex who are battling out with his troops. He calls out for them to switch their focus and quickly joins in as a brawl ensues. Patterson quickly clotheslines Bathory over the top rope and turns back to a forearm from Gabriel. Felix is laying the fists to Colbert as Graver comes from behind and drives a knee right into his kidneys. He however does not see Mr. Blonde climbing back to his feet on the opposite side of the ring. Blonde gets to his feet and charges across the ring tackling Graver and lays the fists to him. Daisuke has also managed to recover and grabs Colbert from behind and flings him over the top ropes and out to the floor below. He then turns to see Phyllis sliding back into the ring and is jumped from behind by Gabriel who was just choking Steve Patterson over the ropes. Gabriel clocks him in the back of the head with a forearm but it is not long before Felix is there for the save shoving Gabriel back and through the ropes to the floor below. Graver quickly rolls out of the ring and heads for the ramp seeing that the odds are no longer in the Rejects favor and calls for a retreat as he and his men head backstage. CL: “That was interesting.” CM: “To say the least.” In the ring Felix is helping Steve to his feet and The Tanaka Zaibatsu brush themselves off and call after the Rejects whom are making their way backstage quickly. As the tag champs and Hardcore Sex stand in the ring triumphant over the Rejects, they be sure to keep a close eye on each other. |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:39 AM Post #6 |
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Unregistered
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Sexy guitars blast attitudinal rock with bassy power while the entire arena is lit up by a rage of multi-colored strobe lights. The Great White Hype bursts through the chain-link gate and throws his hands high above his head much to the displeasure of everyone in attendance, minus maybe a few true backyard marks. While still on stage, Adam starts to jam along with his theme music on his air-guitar, complete with pelvic thrusts and a power stance. Adam then stage dives over the steps and lands in the aisle in another power stance. The Hype rocks out mad air-chords, passing the head of his air-guitar over the crowd as though it were the barrel of a machine gun while rapid-fire pyros spark in the background ala Batista. MA: Making his way to the ring, standing five-foot-ten and weighing in at two-hundred and ten pounds... hailing from Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada... he is the self-proclaimed Vanilla Thrilla... the Man who Can... and a Hardcore Legend in the Making... ADAM THE GREEEEAT WHIIIITE HYYYYYYYYYYPE WIIIIIIILSOOOOOON! With the smoke settling, The Hype starts to strut down the asile, blowing off jeering fans left and right. A quick dash and he slides into the ring and, as soon as he's to his feet, immediately throws his hands up victoriously again while parading himself about. Adam then climbs a turnbuckle so that he may stand atop it and bask further in his "adoration". Satisfied, The Hype bounds backward into the ring and makes his way slowly to his respective corner. CL: Who is this guy? Is the division so stretched they have to give a title shot to anyone with a single win? CM: It was an impressive win… CL: Nonetheless it doesn’t make sense! CM: ..! JH: Let Constance have his moment. If we stop him now chances are he’ll be ranting about it all throughout the match. [align=center]La........La........La....La Wait Till I Get My Money Right! La........La........La....La Then You Can't Tell Me Nothing Right! The lights dim throughout the arena as Kanye repeats the lines accapella. He receives a mixed reaction throughout the arena as Shaun's music blasts. Shaun slowly steps out the curtains and stops right above the stairs. I Had A Dream I Can Buy My Way To Heaven, When I Woke I Spent That On A Necklace. I Told God I'll Be Back In A Second, Man It's So Hard Not To Act Reckless! Shaun stares cockily at the crowd into the arena. He crosses both of his arms as white pyro rains down from the Revoltrons behind him. Once the pyro stops raining Shaun slowly takes off his hood and smirks as he jogs down the stairs. He nods his head to the song as he walks slowly down the aisleway. Clips of Shaun in action plays on the ReVoltrons. MA: From Houston, Texas, weighing in at two hundred and twenty eight pounds, The Flycore Phenom, The African-American Whoop Ass Machine, SHAAAAAAAAAAAUN WILSOOOOON! I Feel The Pressure, Under More Scrutiny And What I Do? Act More Stupidly! [/align] CM: Ah yes, the one true Wilson approacheth the ring. CL: “Apporacheth?” CM: Yes, is it a little much to add a little class to this mat— JH: Hold on! Adam doesn’t seem content on waiting and charges up the ramp toward Shaun. In the middle of the ramp the two start a brawl swinging only lefts to start with. It takes a few moments, but the right soon joins in on the fray as both contenders battle their way up the ramp. JH: Fuzz looks confused. CL: So? He should be getting his ass out there to make sure these guys don’t come near us! Both Shaun and Adam stumble their way up the steps and now continue their brawl up on the stage where Fuzz quickly joins them. By the time Fuzz gets there, Shaun sends Adam running to a fence siding that gets quite a stir from the commentators. CL: Whoa! What the fuck?! JH: Keep the fight away from us. CM: Man, I haven’t heard Constance this shocked since Sybil brought out the— Two brawls start out. Well, one brawl and one massacre. Surprisingly, the massacre takes place on the side of the fence where Fuzz can’t get in. Shaun comes charging toward Adam but after a quick sidestep, Adam wraps both arms around Shaun’s waist looking as though he’s going for something big in the grapple from behind category. However, Shaun quickly twirls around and goes in for the reversal. What he gets though is a shot in the mouth courtesy of Adam’s right elbow. CM: Ouch! I haven’t seen Shaun take a shot in the mouth like that since— CL: Get back here! I’m not done killing you yet! Stumbling backward a few steps, Shaun gives Adam enough room to come charging in with a interface, not really in your face, spear that sends both men through the curtain where a certain champion awaits. Looking down at the two, Colbert tosses away his belt and grabs hold of Adam lifting him up off of Shaun. Colbert knocks Adam back with a shot that would resemble something out of either a spaghetti western or an old Bond film. Either way, Adam topples back like the villain that he is crashing into the wall. Colbert now turns his attention toward the other challenger who only now begins to stir as he rises up to his feet. Colbert allows this to happen. JH: Looks as though Colbert isn’t about to just waste energy if the goal is finishing itself. Once Shaun is to his feet, Colbert goes in for some kind of headlock only to find his ribs somewhat knocked inwards as Shaun shoots out his elbow. The Flycore champ stumbles back in a few steps as Shaun makes his way toward to finish a somewhat well started job. Seeing the African-American whoop ass machine coming toward him, Colbert suddenly…ducks! CM: Whammy! I did not see that coming! What Chip is referring to is the sudden flying forearm that glides over Colbert and connects against Shaun knocking him down. Adam rises up from his newfound state and just in time to. JH: Full nelson front Russian leg sweep! CL: Let’s hope he doesn’t perform that move too many times tonight. Colbert rolls over The Hype and climbs on for a quick pin. [align=center]One! Two! Th—[/align] No! Well globviously, right? The pinfall had taken place partially on the back of Shaun so him rising up clearly knocked the fall out of alignment. Shaun continues to rise up as Colbert waits from behind ready to connect with yet another full nelson front Russian leg sweep. God damn it…*sigh* JH: No! Shaun counters with the arm drag sending the reigning Flycore Champion onto his back! CL: What are you getting so excited for? JH: I don’t know…I don’t think I want any of these guys with the belt actually. CL: No, I don’t care about that. I just lost interest in the match and heard you get excited over something. Shaun now lifts Colbert up to his feet but his hands are quickly shoved away as Colbert intends to fight back. A shove later, Colbert closes the gap rather quickly and suddenly with a running STO knocking Shaun’s back hard against the concrete. CM: Tally Hoe!!! JH: And out of nowhere! Colbert could have this thing won when he—wait, what’s he doing? Colbert turns away from both challengers and starts toward a set of cargo boxes that aren’t too far away. Climbing up to the 1.5 metre box, Colbert looks down and readies for the finishing touch. CM: Hey, I was wondering how he was going to get in his senton splash during this thing. Colbert readies himself, but he doesn’t seem content on the height. No, he needs to be up higher. Not too far away, is a ladder used to change lights. Although for the next few minutes, it’ll have a new use. JH: More height with that six-rung ladder I suppose. While setting it up, Colbert doesn’t notice the slow stir in Shaun as he begins to pull himself together. By the time Colbert is up on the fifth rung, Shaun manages to take into account everything that is going on and almost bolts up the ladder. Colbert catches Shaun just in time. Trouble is though Shaun catches Colbert as well. A sudden boost in a somewhat different angle, and both men are flying through the air as Shaun delivers one hell of a suplex. CL: Sweet Lucifer’s beard! What distance! Both men crash land on the concrete floor below writhing in agony for the next few moments. Adam decides to take advantage of this moment and quickly rises up to his feet. Still a little woozy from that head-to-concrete connection earlier, Adam stumbles around in the proximity of some doors. One of these doors suddenly opens and before you know it…well, you’d know it by now because in order to make it sudden you’d have to interBAMM! Like that. JH: What the hell? Extreme Ninja #2 looks down at the fallen Hype with chair in hand for a moment before heading back into his locker room. CL: Ninja just cold cocked him with that chair! CM: Funny you should mention “cold cock”. —We apologize, but for the next few moments the dialogue of one Constance Loire cannot be aired at this time. We now return you to your scheduled ass kicking— Shaun is the first to his feet as the sudden impact may have caused some slight memory loss. Perhaps the memory of the past few seconds as he doesn’t realize his chances for a pin just yet. But it doesn’t matter as in a few moments, Shaun finds himself no longer all that alone in this match. Both Daisuke and Mr. Blond stand there looking down on Colbert just seemingly visualizing the next few moments in their head. Does it go as they thought? It might if it starts with a solid three on one stomp down assault. JH: What are they doing here? CM: Well they just competed so it should be no surprise to find them wandering around the halls. JH: That was like ten minutes ago! You’d think they’d be back in their locker room by now! CM: I thought they gave that to Roxie. JH: Do you even now when we are? How long ago was that? The three continue to stomp the champ down hard as soon Shaun calls for some dispersement. Both Daisuke and Blond don’t leave though, theymerely stand back as Shaun drops down for a pin. [align=center]One! Two! Three![/align] JH: Shaun Wilson has won! We have a new Flycore Champion! Fuzz hands…wow, he was holding onto that thing the entire match?…hands Shaun the Flycore belt. For a moment, Shaun looks down onto its surface as both Daisuke and Mr. Blond unwrap their tag belts…those guys were wearing those?… JH: Ninja Luv~! Times three! CM: I feel so warm and fuzzy inside. |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:40 AM Post #7 |
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[align=center]FIW Trial Series: Match Four: Hutch vs. Liam Mortell Results: Hutch pins Liam Mortell[/align] |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:41 AM Post #8 |
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Unregistered
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Before we fade in on the matches atmosphere, we see the ladders placed around the ring, four equally sized ladders all looking very much ready to be used as the camera cuts to the commentary desk. CL: Before either of you become rampant in screaming about these two, who gives a fuck ok? JH: There both just as good, so I don’t mind. CM: Stop licking Ninja’s ass. JH: Stop being an ass. CL: Dreams don’t come true my sexually curious friend. The house lights dim and slowly a set of frosted glass doors are lowered over the wrestlers entrance as a tuxedo clad man makes his way onto the concrete stage with microphone in hand. Suddenly bright white lights kick up behind the doors only to reveal the man on the stage further. He pulls the microphone to his lips as Ladies and Gentlemen by Saliva begins to play over the PA system. The man begins to speak over the opening lyrics of the song. Man: “Ladies and gentlemen please…Would you bring your attention to me?” As the crowd fixes their attention on the man a silhouette appears in the light and the man continues to speak over the lyrics of the song. Man: “For a feast for your eyes to see. An explosion of catastrophe.” At the base of the stairs leading to the isle to the ring, a massive white explosion bursts out startling the crowd. The man again continues to speak over the song as he moves in putting a hand on the door handle covering the entrance. Man: “Like nothing you’ve ever seen before. Watch closely as I open this door. Your jaws will be on the floor. After this you’ll be begging for more.” The man then pulls both doors open and the lights behind the glass dim down as two large spot lights focus in on the entrance and he quickly exits the stage as Ethan Adams clad in his entrance robe is revealed. The superstar steps out onto the concrete stage holding his arms out to his side as the song kicks in. [align=center] Welcome to the show Please come inside Ladies and gentlemen[/align] Ethan steps slowly out toward the steps and explosions erupt from the ring cascading to the steps as he tears his robe off and throws it into the crowd with a thunderous approval from the crowd. One lucky fan sitting isle side grabs the robe as Ethan makes his decent down the steps and slaps hands as he makes his way to the ring. [align=center]Boom Do you want it? Boom Do you need it? Boom Let me hear it Ladies and gentlemen[/align] As Ethan approaches the ring several flash bulbs light up his muscular body as ringside fans snap photos. He then turns to the edge of the ring and leaps up onto the ring apron catching himself with the top ropes. MA: The following match is scheduled for one fall and is a ladders are legal match! Which is for the Fighting Spirit Championship! First hailing from Beverly Hills, California and weighing in at two hundred and eleven pounds! EETTTTTHHHHAANNNN AAADDDAMMMMAHHHHHSSSS!!!! [align=center]Boom Do you want it? Boom Do you need it?[/align] Adams then sling shots himself over the ropes flipping over and landing on his feet inside the ring as the crowd applauds him and his music dies down and he moves into his corner and stretches while awaiting the match to begin. JH: Ethan looking’ very dedicated into this match after a strong showing last week. CM: He ran through a house and robbed Shaun Wilson of this shot, so no, he’s a whore. CL: Wow, original insult, where ya find that? ImAFag.com? Suddenly the lights cut out entirely, plunging the arena into darkness, and it doesn’t take long for a few very dark blue lights to start shining, drenching the fans and the ring in blue. Fog starts pouring out near the entrance way, shrouding it in mist, before long the entire arena is nearly engulfed in it. The dark blue lights flash green and red, and purple and then back to blue as a bango drums pound over the speakers. [align=center]The champ is here The champ is here The champ is here The champ is here The Evil Genius The champ is here Aha The champ is here Yeah D-Block Mother Fuckers The champ is here Kiss what ma niggas The champ is here[/align] ”The Champ is Here” starts playing as the curtain is whipped back. Extreme Ninja #2 walks out from behind the curtain, he is wearing his standard in-ring and entrance gear. Ninja looks around as the fans cheer him on before he lifts up his sign dramatically and it reads “Got some bling baby!” Then proceeds to undo his robe to reveal the FIW Fighting Spirit Championship is resting around his waist. [align=center]Fuckin wit the champion You already know J-A-D-A Kiss the game goodbye You fuckin wit the champion You already know Niggas know the champ is in here He took it from crack to rap, now he put out two anthems a year And I just wanna rock for a century And then chase the book wit the documentary If you cant do nothing other than flow Life's a bitch like the mother from blow, lets go Don't make me put your heart on your lap Fuck ridin’ a beat nigga, I parallel park on a track Hop out looking crispy, fresh and new In a six but it's a BM and its Pepsi blue And I don't know you But I know a man becomes a man from all the shit that he go through Y'all ain't fuckin wit Jason After I cash in there's really no justification Of how I'm gone change tha game So don't get outta line cause this little nine will change your frame Mother fucka, aha The champ is here The champ is here The champ is here The champ is here[/align] MA: And his opponent! The current reigning Fighting Spirit Champion! Hailing from Detroit, Michigan and weighing in at two hundred and twenty pounds! EEEXXXTTTRRREEEMMMMEEE NNNIIIINNJJJAAAAHHHH NNNUUUMMMBBBAAAA TTTWWWOOOOOHBHHHH!!!!! Ninja hurries down and slides into the ring and he wastes no time to march over to the corner. He hops up onto it and lifts his balled up hands up in the air. Majority of the fans cheer for him, including the group of fans in the front row dressed up like him hold up their signs which reads “Ninja & Jaime? Match of the Year!” and “Once again the champ!”, and “Ninja <3s Jaime!” and bow to him. EN #2 hops off of the turnbuckle and the lights go up and Ninja flicks back his robe’s hood, revealing his mask fully, he casually pulls off his robe to get ready for the match ahead. Also managing to unhook the FSC from around his waist and holds it up briefly to a few more cheers before waiting for the referee to come take it. JH: Before you go and insult him, realize it’s not his fault you hate him. CL: Yeah, it‘s not his fault he beats your little boys up. CM: I dislike him because he sucks, simple as that, not because of him getting lucky wins. As both Ethan and Ninja stand in there respective corners, J.J checks both of them before showing Ninja his belt, before taking it to Ethan, showing him then moving to the ring area, giving it to a ring monkey before signaling for the match to begin. The match indeed starts as Ethan and Ninja begin circling the ring, watching each other very cautiously, almost watching each other like a lion its prey as then Ninja pounces with a sharp and swift kick, but Ethan moves back avoiding it and simply tapping the side of his head liking the fact Ninja missed. JH: Both being cautious to begin with. CL: Holy crap! Your right! How ever did you see? Oh of course, I can too, stop being obvious. CM: Y… CL: Shut up too. As the pair watch each other more and more cautiously, Ninja again goes in for a kick… but dummies it into a snap headlock, grabbing the doubling over Ethan, Ethan taking it and looking highly irritated by Ninja’s cunning tries to fight out of it, but Ninja wrenches away before swinging Ethan over and then releasing and standing, before just nodding, seemingly showing his respect and happiness at his little show of technical prowess. CM: Not a word either of you, he’s just getting lucky. One a piece it seems as both now get a common footing and circle the ring once more, but this time Ethan wastes no time, diving in with a high knee catching Ninja in the gut before throwing him with force through the middle and top rope to the outside. Ethan then follows in hot pursuit, not wanting to give Ninja any time to breath or wiggle away from his clutches, luckily for Ninja though, Ethan isn’t after him, more after a ladder, grabbing one and sliding it into the ring before turning his attention back to Ninja. CL: Finally! Some proper action. Ethan picks up Ninja, grabbing him by the mask and bashes Ninja right into the apron, before rolling him into the ring, himself then following as he does though, Ninja seems to get a shift in momentum and as Ethan slides in the ring, Ninja delivers a kick right to Ethan’s shoulder, making Ethan seethe in pain as Ninja backs off. But not fully, as Ninja indeed grabs the ladder, placing it in-between the top and middle ropes in the corner on hits side, tapping it to see if it’s sturdy, he then turns… JH: What could Ninja have in mind here. CL: Violence, Violence ohhhh and VIOLENCE. CM: On himself I hope. BUT is caught by surprise as Ethan indeed comes charging towards him in full speed, but Ninja ducks under the forearm attempt, turning as he rolls forward to be met by a soaring Ethan Adams! Who had jumped onto the ladder, leapt onto the top rope then moonsaults back! Crashing down on Ninja who is taken by surprise, with it hit, Ethan goes for the cover! [align=center]ONE… …TWO… NO SHOULDER UP!!!![/align] CM: Boo! Slow count stupid J.J. CL: Boo, you never made him bleed! JH: Uhm… Boo Chip sucks? CL: Yours works more. Ethan looking a little disappointed with only a two stands up, looking towards the downed Ninja, he then moves towards the ladder, brining it from the corner and placing it opened on it’s side on the canvas, he then proceeds to the outside bringing in a second ladder and placing it down on the opened ladder, but as Ethan does, Ninja sees this and LEAPS up and stomps down on the other side of the ladder making it shoot up and CRACK! Ethan right in the face, making him reel backwards as Ninja drops into the corner. JH: Holy ouch! …Ninja then climbs to his feet as he sees Ethan’s forehead has been slightly cut open by the last maneuver, however this has a more intense effect on Ethan as he clicks into a more annoyed sense of expression as he stands up as he and Ninja have a stare off, but that soon changes as Ethan charges and delivers a fired up forearm into Ninja’s face, making him reel into the ropes. Ethan doesn’t stop there as he kicks the ladders away and then Irish whips Ninja into the ropes, Ninja comes back but retaliates with his own come back with a kick to the gut, making Ethan double over as Ninja then snaps a kick right back up, knocking Ethan out of the ring. JH: Holy cow, did you hear the impact of that kick? CL: Yes, that made my balls tingle. CM: …Uhm… CL: Don’t get turned on for fuck sake. As Ethan pulls himself slowly to his feet, holding his chest in some discomfort Ninja grabs one of the kicked away ladders and places it on the ropes, aiming towards Ethan, before backing off, then RUNNING and scaling the ladder before leaping off and towards Ethan! Crashing atop him with a shooting star press! Causing the crowd to roar into a “HOLY SHIT!” chant as J.J. climbs out to check on the pair. CL: DANGEROUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!! CM: Meh… predictable. JH: Are you joking, that was awesome! J.J. seems to make sure both are ok as Ninja climbs to his feet first, rolling in the ring and raising a arm to a huge cheer before grabbing the ladder he just ran up and placing it center of the ring. Ethan follows pursuit looking more worse for wear as he then is met by a forearm to his face again before Ninja moves him to the ladder, but as he does, Ethan kicks him right in the gut before running to the ropes! As he does though he jumps onto the second rope before moonsaulting back, but as he does he lands over Ninja holding in a reverse DDT before planting Ninja back of the head first with a reverse DDT over the ladder! As he does he and Ninja both seem down as Ethan takes a breather. JH: Nobody’s holding back in this one. CL: I know, but come on, more blood is needed! CM: Or just it to end so I can see someone with talent. CL: GaysRUs under your chair would preoccupy you buddy, go read, you know you want to. Both men begin to steadily climb to there feet, both looking towards each other as they do, they move towards each other, Ethan still reeling after the kick to the chest and Ninja holds the back of his head before Ethan screams “COME ON THEN!” of course this makes Ninja smack him with a forearm, making Ethan dish one straight back, but then Ninja snaps a kick into his left shin making Ethan look even more ready as he connects with a European uppercut making Ninja come back with a knife edge chop to a trademark “Whooo” making the crowd realise the intense want in both guys! JH: Listen to those damn strikes, ouch. CL: I love it, come on harder! CM: Yeah, knock both of you out, that sounds good. …Ethan and Ninja still plow strikes into each other before both hit a forearm making each stagger back, and giving Ninja just the opportunity to connect with a leaping enziguiri connecting with Ethan’s skull, making him drop in exhaustion and the power of the kick onto the canvas, Ninja sees this as a chance and makes the cover… [align=center]ONE… …TWO… NO SHOULDER UP!!!![/align] JH: So close, this match is long and tiring for both guys. Of course Ninja sits up, taking deep breaths as he looks towards what he could possibly do next, looking towards the ladder he seems to have an idea as he moves towards the ladder and then places one and another atop the other ladder before climbing to the top rope steadily, watching Ethan who climbs to his feet steadily, but as he does, Ethan dashes to the ropes making Ninja lose his footing and drop into a crotched position, in doing so Ethan sees a opportunity, climbing to the top and lifting Ninja up with him before turning to look around him for a second… JH: He wouldn’t… that’s career suicide! CL: Oh good god, death? This could be highly… …Indeed Ethan LEAPS and with Ninja too in a moonsault uranage slam from the top, crashing over the two ladders with Ninja in the most vile manner imaginable as the crowd gasp in awe, as both men drop to there downed position, J.J. checking on both instantly! JH: SHOW STOPPER! HOLY SHIT! CL: That was fucking vile! CM: He’s killed himself! Finally! As Ethan crawls, pushing all his energy towards Ninja to make the cover BUT! [align=center]DING! DING! DING![/align] …The ring bells going making the crowd go into instant booing, as Michael speaks! MA: Ladies and gentleman the time limit has gone! Meaning die to a thirty minute time limit draw1 this match is a DRAW! Meaning! STILL Fighting Spirit Champion! EEEXXXTTTRRREEEMMMMEEE NNNIIIINNJJJAAAAHHHH NNNUUUMMMBBBAAAA TTTWWWOOOOOHBHHHH!!!!! The crowd start chanting “FIVE MORE MINUTES!” But nope, J.J. hands the seemingly crippled Ninja his title belt as Ethan rolls onto his back, looking highly gutted, but as this all happens, Drake Love shows up on the entrance way, clapping and laughing at the two’s seemingly hard fought but drawn match. JH: What a match, truly hard fought but ruined by him, Drake leave! CM: HA! Finally someone worthy of being cheered. CL: I don’t care, I think that match was ok, so? Drake goes back to the backstage, seemingly Ninja has seen him and looks somewhat annoyed as Ethan and Nina exchange a stare, respect is there after such a battle as the camera cuts to the commentary desk. |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 03:42 AM Post #9 |
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Unregistered
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The first second of the song, all lights go out save a white flashing strobelight that comes on with each heavy bass beat. This happens for about ten seconds until the solo distorted guitar kicks in for the arrival of the monster that is Crackerjack. Right behind him is the familiar figure of face paint and a crimson trench coat, the advisor to the masked monster, Onikage. Jack's sheer size seems larger through semi darkness as his appearance even more frightening through the flashing strobelights. He stands there for a moment before moving down through calypso given steel drum beats. Crackerjack slowly makes his way down to the ring making sure each step counts while looking around through different sections of the crowd one booing fan at a time. The entire time the Messiah of the Mind whispers things to Crackerjack from behind him as he follows down to the ringside area. The white strobelights slowly becoming a mixture of navy blue and a normal blue. Soon, the monster is ready to enter the ring. Instead of actually going in though, Crackerjack stands there and overlooks the ring from between the top and middle rope. In a quick instant, Crackerjack seizes the top rope and uses it to keep balance as he pulls his entire form up in one step to the apron. Still outside the ring, Crackerjack walks along the apron for a few steps before turning around and entering the ring over the top rope where the purple light that overshadows the ring awaits him. Now inside, the huge monstrosity of evil takes his time walking around the ring in a slow, yet methodical circle. Onikage circles the ringside area the entire time, eyeing FIW staff and fans with those soulless white eyes and a smile on his painted features. Crackerjack continues to walk around as the normal houselights slowly overtake the purple cover. [align=center]You Run Your Mouth, Imma Kick Yo' Ass You Play Crazy, Imma Kick Yo' Ass You Too Hyphy, Imma Kick Yo' Ass You Act A Fool, Imma Kick Yo' Ass You Wanna Shoot, Imma Kick Yo' Ass Think You Cute, Imma Kick Yo' Ass You Got Drink, Then Poor Me A Glass I Get Drunk, And Imma Kick Some Ass[/align] As "Kick Yo' Ass" pounds through the arena speakers and red stage lights pulsing to the music, Grant Rice bursts onto the stage, hand in the air proudly presenting the Revolution's hand sign to a roar from the crowd as they jump to their feet on sight of the Kansas City native. He lowers his arm as he quickly pops his neck on his way down the aisle. He reaches the ring, hoping onto the apron before entering between the ropes. Once in the ring, Grant heads to the corner where he hops up once again proudly displaying The Revolution hand sign with one hand as he points to the logo on his jersey with the other, flashbulbs washing over him. He quickly slides his jersey off and chucks it into the crowd, watching the females in the crowd fight over it before hoping down, ready to go. MA: The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall and is for the UNDISPUTED INTERNATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP!!! Introducing first, in the northwest corner… GRANT! RIIIIIIIIIICE!!! And in the Southeast corner… he is your current Undisputed International Champion… CRRRRRRAAAAAACKERJAAAAAAAACK!!! [align=center]DINGDINGDING!!![/align] JH: Well, our Undisputed International Championship match is just beginning., both men are in the ring and ready to rumble! Grant Rice and Crackerjack both step toward each other in the ring, squaring off and sizing one another up. Grant raises his hands in offer for a test of strength. CL: Oh, cool. He’s suicidal. That’s always good. Crackerjack smirks at the test of strength, and shakes his wrist out to raise his hands, but instead introduces a BONE-CRACKING spinning elbow to Grant’s body! Grant is LIFTED off his feet and falls back against the canvas! CL: See, that’s what you get. CM: Grant is just being foolish, here. As usual. CL: This is actually kind of a gay match. Why the hell do we sit out here when we hate all the people involved? CM: I dunno. Wanna get some popcorn? CL: Yeah, OK. JH: Where the hell are you guys going? CM: This match is gay. Just like most of the matches with those idiot Rejects fighting people I hate. JH: Maybe if you didn’t hate so many people it wouldn’t be a problem. CL: Yeah, that’s called selling a gimmick, Hitchen. JH: What are you talking about? Aaaaaanyway, back to the match. Crackerjack bows low over Grant Rice’s body and begins pummeling right hands into his face. Grant throws both palms up to block a blow, then NAILS a knee between Crackerjack’s legs! JH: And an equalizing blow takes Crackerjack off Grant! Mark Jackson is quick to jump on Grant’s shit and yell at him for the low blow. Grant tries to rationalize it as a Manhattan Drop kind of technique, but before any of that makes a damn difference, Crackerjack BARELY misses taking BOTH of their heads off with a lariat! JH: Grant Rice needs to stop arguing with the referee and keep his head in this game… or Crackerjack’s gonna take it out! Jack rebounds off the ropes, but Grant is ready for him. He feints to the side, grabs Jack by his wife beater and uses Jack’s own momentum to send him sliding out of the ring. Mark starts counting and Grant follows Crackerjack as he tries to peel himself up from the protective mats. [align=center]ONE! TWO![/align] Grant stomps the back of his head, smashing his face back into the mats again. Crackerjack gets mad and forces himself back up, and STRAIGHT into Grant Rice’s waiting arms. JH: Crackerjack just backed right into a trap! Great thinking by Grant Rice! [align=center]THREE! FOUR!![/align] Grant HEEEEFTS Crackerjack, once again using the momentum of his quick rise to DRIVE HIM SHOULDERS-FIRST INTO THE STAIRS WITH A-- JH: GERMAN SUPLEX FROM GRANT RICE!!! [align=center]FIVE!! SIX!![/align] Grant rolls back into the ring, but Onikage at ringside drags him back out! Mark starts yelling at Onikage, Grant starts yelling at Onikage, but the Slothly manager holds up his hands and steps back. Grant grumbles and returns to the destroyed stairs and Crackerjack’s writhing body. Grant gets down to lift ‘Jack back up, but the bone-cracker JAMS a fist into Grant’s face and rises on his own! [align=center]ONE! TWO![/align] JH: There’s no denying Crackerjack’s power. I’m not sure Grant Rice’s technical prowess will be enough to stop him! Crackerjack stumbles a bit as he rises and Grant approaches again, but ‘Jack is well enough to BLAST Crackerjack’s jaw with a huge uppercut! [align=center]THREE! FOUR!![/align] JH: It’s a testament to Crackerjack’s strength that mere punches are knocking Grant Rice back enough to make him think twice about stepping close! [align=center]FIVE!! SIX!![/align] Grant breathes hard and shakes his wrists out, looking for a chink in the dragon that is Crackerjack’s armor. He feints in and dodges to the left when ‘Jack calls his bluff and DRIVES a toe kick into Grant’s abdomen. ‘Jack BOUNCES Grant’s head off the turnbuckle before sliding him back into the ring. JH: Poor Mark can’t seem to get above a count of six! Ha. ‘Jack picks Grant up off the mat and tosses him toward the ropes. Grant hits a rebound and before Crackerjack can do a damn thing, Rice raises his leg and NAILS A RUNNING YAKUZA KICK!! JH: UZI!!! UZI!!! Grant is lightning quick to grab Crackerjack by the ankle and drag him over onto his front, locking the ankle tightly! JH: STRAIGHT MIZERY!! STRAIGHT MIZERY!!! Crackerjack digs his fingers into the canvas and attempts to reach the ropes but is confined in the center of the ring, it seems! JH: Grant Rice has it locked in tightly, I don’t think Crackerjack has any choice! He’s GOT to tap! Grant keeps a kneel and continues to wrench the hold. Crackerjack starts to get a decent head, dragging himself forward by a few feet, but Grant stands up quickly and drags him back! JH: Folks I… I’ve just been informed we’re approaching the end of the thirty minute time limit for this match! Grant Rice has GOT to make Crackerjack tap, or he’s lost this title due to a time limit draw! Grant seems to realize this, sweat dripping down his brow. He wrenches the lock ever harder, moving to get a better wrench on the ankle. Crackerjack howls with pain and drags himself forward. JH: Crackerjack has got to tap! I don’t know how he can survive such torture to such a sensitive area! Crackerjack reaches far toward the edge of the ring, but his hand falls and the bell rings! JH: Was that… did he… did Grant make him tap!? We wait for the official decision from the referee, who relays it to the ring announcer via hand signals. MA: Ladies and gentlemen… the result of this match… is a TIME LIMIT DRAW!! Meaning the UNDISPUTED INTERNATIONAL CHAMPION… CRRRRAAAAAACKERJAAAAAACK!!! Grant stands and sighs as Mark Jackson grudgingly hands the belt to Crackerjack. Crackerjack sidles over to Grant with the belt on his shoulders, grimacing. Grant glares right back and gets in a fighting stance, but then relaxes and extends a hand. JH: Is he… asking for a shake? What a surprise! Crackerjack looks at the hand, but before anything can happen, Elrick comes OUT OF NOWHERE and slides into the ring, NAILING Crackerjack with a running forearm! He falls on top of him and pummels him in the face for a good few seconds! Rice grunts and pulls Elrick off, looking upset. Crackerjack rolls out of the ring grimacing and rubbing his jaw. Onikage clings to his side, patting him on the back as they return to the back. |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 04:07 AM Post #10 |
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Unregistered
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Generic Latin ballad music plays over the P.A. system and the lights turn to shades of white, green and red through out the arena. The curtain is whipped back to reveal a lanky woman who is pale as a ghost and is wearing a black mask and a black pair of tights, and boots! This Hellcat spins around to reveal she is wearing a cape that has the Mexican flag design on it as well as two reads that stretch across the flag design that read "Senorita Generico". Senorita Generico bounces down the steps and to the ring, sliding into the ring and undoing her cape to a few cheers and polite applause. The house lights fade into darkness, sending a quiet murmur throughout the arena. Heavy drum beats spark the stage lights to life, the rainbow of strobes following as the vocals of “Burn” by the Luchagors kick into the PA system. Jaime skips out onto the stage shortly after with her Hellcat Division Championship over her shoulder. She playfully flips her hair up before raising the championship with both hands above her head. She trots down the stairs, continuing to skip down towards the ring, grinning and holding the championship up proudly along the way. MA: Making her way to the ring from Ohio, she is your HELLCAT DIVISION CHAMPION… JAAAAYYYMMMMEEE LLLLLEEEE!!! Jaime ducks in under the bottom rope, flinging her hair back as she raises her head with a grin from ear to ear. She pops up to her feet and steps into the nearest turnbuckle, blowing a kiss to the fans in the front row and then leaping up to the middle turnbuckle. Once again she flings her hair back as she raises her head and shoots an arm up into the air with the Hellcat Division Championship held in her grasp. Ending the photo op, she jumps back down to the canvas and skips across to the other side of the ring, once again raising the championship up into the air. Her smile fades slightly as she passes her championship off to the referee and backs into her turnbuckle, ready to get serious for the upcoming contest. DING! DING! DING! Sound of the bell and an expect flurry of Hellcat action... doesn't come. Instead, both a hesitant Lee and Generico stand off defensivly from each other. Finally, Generico makes the overture to Jaime as she inches forward and challenges the Hellcat champion to a test of strength. Jaime raises her hand, obliged to take on Genericos challenge, and instead falls victim to a well laid plan as Generico snaps a wrist lock on Jaime with both hands and twists it around into Hammer Lock before latching around Jaimes head with a Side Head Lock. JH: Some well strategized and very disciplined submission style wrestling from Senorita Generico! CM: *yawn* Whatever... just show me the goods, ladies. That's what you're here for! Pugnaciosly, Jaime fights out of the Headlock with some Forearm Shots to Genericos back followed up by a strong Shove that sends Generico into the ropes. Upon rebound, Generico's taken over by a Headlock Takedown and Jaime's covering for a quick win! [align=center]ONE! TWO! KICK OUT![/align] Though pushed off, Jaime slips right back behind Generico before the mystery Hellcat can even get to her feet, and slips her arms around Generico to seize her up in a Sleeper Hold! Both Hellcats rise to their feet and Jaime then adjusts her footing into a wide stance and turns that Sleeper into a Side Headlock of her own! generico flails her hands about, trying to find a counter, and instead opts to take the low road by grabbing a handful of hair and throws Jaime down with a Mat Slam! Jaime's right back to her feet and re-applies the Side Headlock, this time she drops to a knee for leverages sake, and to avoid and sneaky tactics from Generico. Damning the pain, Generico leans far enough to one side to pull Jaime back to her feet and after hammering a forearm into Jaime's vulnerable stomach, Generico shoves Lee into the ropes and knocks her down with a Shoulder Block. Generico looks to head into the ropes herself, but the downed Jaime grabs ahold of her leg and hauls her to the mat. JH: Some sneaky tactics of her own from the Hellcat champion! CL: Jaime's gotta be wrestling through pure instinct right now guys. There was no way she could have strategised for a match against an unknown opponent... no one could! CM: What strategy?! When you're a Hellcat you get in, you shake your ass, you get out! No strategy neccessary. Frustrated, Generico clammers to her feet and comes about in time to be dragged over by a deep Arm Drag from Jaime... and then another... and another! Generico's to her feet one last time and this time gets nailed by a standing Dropkick from the Hellcat Champion! Jaime's on the offensive now and comes from behind with a little revenge, hauling Generico down by her hair with a Mat Slam. But she holds strong to Genericos hair and yanks her up again, pulling her into a front face lock, and huals her over with a lightning-quick Snap Suplex! Jaime floats over and hooks a leg! JH: This could be it. Cover! [align=center]ONE! TWO! KICK OUT![/align] CL: Not enough to put the challenger and debuting Senorita Generico away. CM: You think?! With no watse in motion, Jaime is right back on Generico, but her haste costs her as she falls victim to a HUGE desperation Upper Cut. Jaime's stunned and staggers backward while palming her jaw. Generico then grabs ahold of Jaimes shoulders and charges the Hellcat Champion backward and straight into the turnbuckles. Jaime has little time to tend to her back as Generico bcks up and charges in again with a FLing Forearm! The shot rocks Lee and she staggers from the corner while Generico finds a landing on the outside apron and climbs right to the top rope. As Jaime turns about, Generico springs into the air and Cross Bodies Jamie to the mat! Generico hooks both of Jaimes legs and... [align=center]ONE! TWO! THRE KICK OUT![/align] JH: That big time Cross Body nearly earned Generico more than athree count there, fellahs! CL: We were less than a half-second from crowning a new Hellcat champion! The high risk style the Generico employed in the Cross Body has taken its toll on both Hellcats as they both are slow to get to their feet. Generico is first and grabs a generous handful of Lees locks. Adrenaline courses though and Lee's shoving Generico off and feeding the mystery challenger some ferocisouly fired Forearms that force her back to the opposite corner from the impact site. Jaime continues hammering those forearms to Generico and then finishes with a stiff Roundhouse Kick to the temple that leaves Generico hanging on the turnbuckles! Lee backs up and charges in with a full steam Shoulder Thrust.. but finds only the ring post! Generico slipped away at the last possible second and now rolls Jaime backward with a Schoolboy and covers for a pin again! [align=center]ONE![/align] JH: This could be all for the Hellcat champion! [align=center]TWO![/align] CL: She did hit that ring post pretty F'ing hard! [align=center]Thre-[/align] JH: Has Jaime Lees own haste and miscalculation cost herself the Hellcat championship to this... this unkown?! [align=center]KICK OUT![/align] The crowd roars an ovation as Jaime kicks out of the pi at the last possible second! Generico can't believe the Hellcat champions resiliance! Fueled by a fit of rage, Generico starts pouding left and right Forearms to the Lees back after the champion instictivly rolled to her front. Generico then mounts Les back and pounds those Forearms to Lees prone skull! Referee Logan Black exercise some compassion and demands Generico cease her merciless assault on the Hellcat champion. Generico shoves away from Jaime and gets right in the refs face, reminding him that this match is anything goes! Which reminds her... JH: Now where in the hell is Generico going? Slipping to the outside, Generico reaches over the guardrail and steals a fans chair away! CM: Now we're talking! Generico slips back into the ring with her steel chair and adtops a readied position. She's coiled and aiming to strike just as soon as Jaime is standing on her clumsy legs. Jaime's up and staggers around in time to see Generico in full swing! Jamie slips aside as the chair sails wide, forcing Generico into a spin! As she comes about Generico suffers an ironic fate. Jaime pops her hip and crushes the chair against Genericos skull with a high and tight Roundhouse Kick! CL: TURN THE BEAT AROUND! TURN THE BEAT AROUND INTO A STEEL FUCKING CHAIR! JH: And it's all legal folks! CM: FUCK YEA! That was AWESOME! Generico collapses to the mat and Jaime falls on top. [align=center]ONE![/align] CL: No way Generico's getting up after that hellacous chair shot! [align=center]TWO![/align] JH: WHAT A SHOT! WHAT A SHOT! [align=center]THRE-KICK OUT![/align] CM: Are you fucking KIDDING ME!? Generico shoots her shoulder from the canvas just as Logan Black was coming down for the three. Jaime can't believe it and neither can this capacity FIW crowd either! Jaime stands and tries to pull Generico to her feet but Generico is so out of it that she's dead weight in Lees hands and proves to awkward to handle. Jaime can't keep Generico aloft in her own fatigued state and drops her challenger before getting her completely to her feet. JH: Senorita Generico is such dead weight that Jaime Lee cannot hoist her up! CM: So go for another cover, damnit! Jaime's at a loss for what to do, and that's when a bassy boo rises from the crowd. From the stage comes a face we'd hoped not to see again tonight... Adam "The Great White Hype" Wilson. JH: Now just what in the hell do you suppose he's doing out here?! CM: Maybe he's here to offer some advice...? Hardly... the Hype stops at ringside and simply watches Jaimes inaction with a clever grin. Jaime spies the Hype and shoots him and awkward look before backing away from his end of the ring... and right into a roll up from Generico! [align=center]ONE! TWO! THRE-KICK OUT![/align] Generico staggers to her feet while Jaime shoots Adam a cold glare, blaming him for the roll up. She should pay attention! Generico comes from behind with a Chop Block... desperation move that hurts Jaime in more ways than imaginable. Adam smirks out a lagh from ringside as Jaime grasps at her knee and winces. Generico has gotten much of her composure back and grabs for Jaime. The Hellcat Champion is hauled from the mat and Generico looks to take Jaimes head off with a Short Arm Clothesline! But Jaime ducks under and holds strong to Genericos arm, short arming her opponent and seting up for something huge. She drives Genericos head into the mat with her ARM WRENCH DDT! CL: BLOOD ON THE DANCE FLOOR! CM: SWEET FUCKING CHRIST, I love that move! Jaime rolls a limp leg over Generico and... [align=center]ONE! TWO! THREE![/align] DING! DING DING! MA: Your winner of the match and STILL FIW Hellcat Champion... JAIMEEEEEEE LEEEEEEEE! JH: Well that's the route to a win I think Jaime was looking for! CM: Yay! The much more hot girl won! CL: Well, the bottom line is Jaime Lee is a winner tonight! Jaime's theme blares all through the arena, a smile spreading across her face as she is handed the championship belt. She ignores her fallen opponent and Adam to bounce a bit, even moving towards the turnbuckle to celebrate her victory. That is until a massive person enters the ring and charges right at her from behind, clubbing her upside the head! Lee drops to the mat in a heap and drops the championship as Adam's eyes widen at this sudden and surprise attack! JH: Who is that?! Good lord! She has to be...near six feet tall! CL: And, by the looks of it she looks like she's seen more than a few ho-hos in her day. CM: That's...a woman?! No way! The large African American woman roars and grabs Jaime by the air, yanking her up to her feet by force and tossing her across the ring! FIW's Hellcat Division Champion spins through the air several times before hitting the mat with a nasty thud! This mysterious Hellcat roars again and pounds her fists against her chest, the fans jeering her with all their might! Wilson the entire time looks on, the expression on his face telling the story as his fists ball into fists at this display. CL: Fuck! No way can Jaime contend with that thing! CM: THAT thing right there is...a woman?! JH: Yes! It's a woman! And, she is assaulting Jaime! Valiantly Jaime tries to get back up but the much larger female gets a hold of her and lifts her up without a second thought. She slams Lee head first into the canvas with a destructive powerbomb and growls at the champion. Neither Hellcat notices another figure appearing; Drake Love slips into the ring quickly and darts for the piece of silver laying there. This mysterious Hellcat turns around in time to see Love making off with the champion and roars, chasing after the Mile High Mad Man for it! CM: Hey! Hey! It's Drake! JH: What in the world?! Drake Love just stole the FIW Hellcat Division Championship! CL: And, he has that big dinosaur chasing after him for it! EMTs and FIW officials hurry out to the ring, McCoy and J.J. checking on Jaime to see how bad her injuries are. There is a brief cheer from the fans when Extreme Ninja #2 bolts to the ring, sliding in and checking on his friend too. As these people continue to check on Lee, Adam Wilson stands at ringside with a strange look in his eyes and a bitter smirk. Slowly he backs away from the scene, leaving Jaime's friends and the staff to attend to her right now. |
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| Kryten Shards | Nov 3 2007, 04:28 AM Post #11 |
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JH: That was unthinkable! The Hellcat Division Championship has been stolen…by Drake Love! CL: Not to mention that huge bulldozer that ran over Jaime. CM: I still can’t believe that…that…that thing was a woman! JH: Beyond that, we’ve had a chaotic night at ReVolt Against the Champions Three to say the very least. CL: We got a new fucking champion! CM: Thus the freaks lost one piece of gold…erm…silver in their possession. JH: It’s all been leading up to this up coming match though folks, the Dual Crown Championship will be on the line! CL: Hang on, I’ll save you the breath Hitchen, it’ll be the rematch over one year in the making, can Kennedy over come one of the longest reigning champions ever in FIW or will the champ crush the FIW Icon?! Good enough for ya or did it need more ham on it? CM: That reminds me, I still have that ham and cheese sandwich I bought earlier when you went and got popcorn in here. MA: Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is the scheduled main event for this edition of ReVolt Against the Champions! It has been granted a one hour time limit by Lazaro and will be one fall to a finish with the official for this bout being FIW’s senior referee, Tony Clarke! And…it is for the…Full Intensity Wrestling…Dual Crown Championship! A low feedback buzzes through the speakers before 'Up Here' crashes into the system, bringing the crowd to their feet as Kennedy steps through the curtain. She moves to the end of the stage, rebounding slightly and raising both arms into the air, gazing out at the fans in attendance. She makes her way towards the ring, stopping halfway to acknowledge the crowd‘s reaction for her. MA: Making her way to the ring from Los Angeles, California… KEEEENNNNNEEEDDDYYYY!!!! Reaching the ring, she slides in under the bottom rope and immediately bounds to her feet. She rushes to the furthest turnbuckle, scaling it and raising her arms into the air to thousands of flashing bulbs. She drops back down to the mat, spinning around and rushing across the ring, up the opposite turnbuckle to another round of camera flashes. She eventually drops back down to the mat, turning to awaiting the start of the match. CL: I have my doubts the pussy can over come the mountain it has to climb in…Kennedy. CM: Wait…huh…I’m confused… JH: It was a play on words, pussy cat, but because he didn’t clarify it made it also sound like he could be referring to Kennedy in the modern slang for…um…yes, well, you get the point. [align=center]A weird sound echoes around arena and soon a guitar begins to play with the echo in the background, the bass guitar comes in shortly after. The guitars and echo stop, a drum and piano beat replace them. Xtreme Kitten appears from behind the curtain as the drums come in. He has around his neck the chain that Lucy used to carry now he carries it in his right hand and over his head covering his face he wears his mask. Kitten stands on the stage listening to the mix of his music, the supporting cheers and the hate filled jeers. I realize my world of demise and the poisonous sky that's stinging my eyes I clench my fist I spill my blood I clench my fist 'cause I am the tool Xtreme Kitten walks down to ringside calmly, he stands there and surveys the ring. I'm burning with contempt that's bringing me down! I'm burning with contempt that's bringing me down! I'm burning with contempt that's bringing me down! Kitten gets a short run up and jumps onto the apron landing on one foot then the other, he then hops into the ring and jogs to his corner while undoing the spiked collar. Kitten hangs the chain over the middle turnbuckle. AS OF NOW I AM A TOOL OF SEVERE IMPACT HAMMER DOWN CAUSE AND EFFECT AND CREATE A NEW WORLD! The music stops and Kitten quickly pulls off his mask. Kitten points the a member of the crowd and offers to throw the mask to them, their excitement turns to angry as Xtreme Kitten laughs a little and throws his mask onto the apron near his corner. He then walks over to his corner and rest against it waiting for the match to start.[/align] MA: And introducing the champion, he hails from Shoal Bay, NSW, Australia and weighs in at two hundred and fifty five pounds and stands at six feet and three inches…He is your reigning FIW Dual Crown Champion…HE! IS! …XXXXXXXTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREMMMMMMMMMMMME KIIIIIIIIIIITTEEEEEEEENNNNNNNN~!!! CM: Gah, a match full of people I don’t really like…at all…ah well, least it still has hot chicks in it. JH: Oi, Kennedy is more than just a pretty face, you know. CL: Oh I’m sure he knows, I just don’t think he cares much. Tony Clarke enters both corners and pats each competitor down to ensure no illegal objects of any kind on them, first Kennedy and then moving onto XK. Once the task is complete he moves back to the center of the ring and calls on both to meet him there, both comply obediently. There the referee explains the rules to both parties, making sure both understand them fully and doesn’t proceed until he gets a nod out of the challenger and champion. He asks for a hand shake, some thing neither party seems all that interested in doing and so he just holds up the GHC & WHC and then calls for the bell. [align=center]DING DING DING~!!![/align] Signaling the start of the match, FIW’s Leading Lady tries to get the first shot in with a few forearm strikes only to have FIW’s Feline Fighter side step the strikes. With a single sharp and precise forearm strike the champion sends his challenger stumbling a bit, and fires off a second one for good measure. The crowd is split down the middle, some cheering and others jeering the actions of XK as he fires off a flurry of forearm strikes on the Original Hellcat. This partial support starts to fire the smaller and much more female of the two up only to get a head butt to the forehead that kills it before it can even get started. JH: Goodness! Kitten is looking extraordinarily brutal than normal in this match! CL: Correction, he’s always this brutal, I just think he might be trying to end this as quickly as possible. CM: I might need to do a run in if he keeps on with that face related attacks. Not to be denied, Kennedy attempts retaliation again with trying to hit a kick that gets blocked by the leg of Kitten and with his other sweeps her remaining leg out from under her! Almost as soon as her back hits the canvas the champion brings a foot down onto her midsection in his signature way, knocking the wind right out of her in a massive forced exhale. Stunned by the shot, it leaves FIW’s Leading Lady wide open for a second and a third and even a fourth helping of the fierce stomps to her midsection from FIW’s Feline Fighter. Xtreme Kitten pauses for a moment from his abusing of the Hellcat to spread out his arms and proclaim “BEST! FIGHTER! IN! THE! WORLD!” to mostly jeers this time. CL: Looks like the crowd isn’t completely tasteless and dislikes being too rough with the ladies and being a arrogant prick. CM: Ouch! After those…whatever he calls them…stomps, I may need to massage poor Kennedy to help her relax! JH: Garvin Stomps is what they are called, and he is certainly not shy of sharing them with her! Amidst the jeers and cheers a noise manages to emerge, it catches the ear of Kennedy and the ear of Xtreme Kitten in its simple beat as it pounds every few seconds. This beat seems to will the Original Hellcat and she flings her lower body upward, rolling backwards and right up to her feet! XK’s attention is taken by it long enough for her to hit a toe kick and snatch a hold of his head before he realizes just what it is she is doing and what is happening to him. After a especially painful looking swinging neckbreaker, FIW’s Leading Lady gets back up to her feet to see what the noise is and her eyes fall on…Prime in her corner, pounding against the apron! CM: Holy crap! Where’d Prime come from?! JH: Maybe he’s taking lessons from Daisuke Tanaka. CL: Or, maybe you two are blind as bats, because he just walked out right in front of us a few minutes ago. This arrival most unexpected if Miss Sommers’ expression is to account for any thing in this whole messy affair of alcohol, sex and wise cracking Englishman. What seems like an eternity; she stands there staring at FIW’s Adonis clapping on to show his support for her cause in this match. Eventually reality kicks her in the pants and she remembers what she’s supposed to be doing, kicking XK upside the head to ensure that he’s staying where she put him. Perhaps feeling a little pay back is in order, the Original Hellcat drops down onto her knees over the fallen body and she picks his head up by a handful of hair, punching it with her free one! JH: Kennedy is back in the saddle! CL: Hitchen! There’s no proof she was “in the saddle” with Prime...Cue awkward British spasms of apology in 3…2…1… CM: Mmmhmmm…I wouldn’t mind a ride with Kennedy… Fist after fist after fist after fist quickly clobbers the cranium of the champion, leaving him putty in the hands of his challenger who is still getting support from Prime at ringside. In fact, FIW’s Evolution of Excellence seems to be getting the scales tipped more in Kennedy’s favor as far as the crowd’s preference is concerned at the moment. Growing satisfied with her work, FIW’s Leading Lady ceases with the punches and drops FIW’s Feline Fighter’s head and gets back up to her feet with a determined look in her eyes. She flings her weight backwards, managing to flip right in the air from her standing position and her midsection comes crashing down upon the head of XK with a standing moonsault! CL: At this rate the cat is going to need a Advil after the match. CM: Hey! Some thing I actually enjoyed watching! JH: Of course, Chip only acknowledges some thing beyond a woman’s appearance when she does some thing involving a flip! Wasting very little time, FIW’s Leading Lady gets back up to a crouched position and grabs a hold of XK’s head by the neck and wrapping her arm around it tightly. Carefully the challenger makes sure she’s got the front facelock on tight and then flips her body, performing a picture perfect bridge. Prime manages to rally a small “Tap” chant to get going while Kitten waves his arm around and curses the Original Hellcat for the agony he is going through. Frantically FIW’s Feline Fighter tries to spread out his legs in an attempt to knock the bridge’s base right out from under her though to no avail as Kennedy plants herself further in the base. CM: Yaaaaaaawn… JH: A submission! This could be it! CL: Well, we know at the very least Kitten has no shame in submitting. Her fingers’ nails digging into the flesh of Kitten’s bare neck that allow her to pull back even harder result in Kitten let out more near growling like cries of pain. While the nails trying to pierce the flesh appear to be affecting FIW’s Adonis in Kennedy’s corner like he’s seen a ghost from the not too distant past. Regardless of Prime’s reaction, the senior official does his job and kneels down before the two wrestlers and continually makes sure XK isn’t ready to tap. Quite the contrary, the champion is still hammering his legs against the challenger’s from the inner sides to try and get the whole submission to cave upon itself. JH: My, Kennedy getting a bit…ahem…rough with that submission, she better be careful or Tony might make her release the hold. CL: Seems Prime has realized she’s just the kind of girl that likes it rough in all things in her life. CM: I can do rough! …As long as it doesn’t scratch a nail or mess with my hair or ruin my perfectly trimmed facial hair or my taint regularly moistened skin that is. Another nice thing about forcing Kennedy to widen her base on the bridge is that it is making it much easier for Xtreme Kitten to slip his legs in between them. Some thing that’s not so nice for FIW’s Leading Lady, considering how close FIW’s Feline Fighter and her in this submission are to the ropes. That fact hasn’t slipped the mind of the challenge either, who is pulling so far back on the championship’s neck she is nearly bending him right in half at this point! With each passing moment the life drifting up out of XK’s body and leaving him limply in the clutches of the Original Hellcat with the senior official to attend with too. CL: Looks like we might have a new type of fucking cat after this hold, a pretzel kind. CM: Pretzels are good but not as good as this ham and cheese sandwich...mmhmm… JH: I prefer Snacky Smores personally, a sponsor of the Full Intensity Wrestling promotion! Growing fed up with trying to take out the base of the bridge the champion does the only thing he can do at this point, and that’s wiggle out from under the challenger. A feat that is both easy because of the passage he’s made, and uneasy because of the vice hold he’s head is in currently. That is until a noise from ringside distracts both Tony and Kennedy, and most of the fans, the noise is all three hundred plus pounds of Prime colliding with the ring post! All eyes are on the smugly smirking Hutch standing near the dazed Adonis that hardly any one notices XK frantic scooting under Kennedy and reaching the ropes, except for Mister Clarke. CM: Can’t believe I’m saying this…But thank you Hutch! You saved me from any more boring submission! JH: What on Earth spurred Hutch to do that?! Prime was just watching the match! CL: Lust, jealousy, envy, need I go on? Ignoring the jeers he is getting for that attack, FIW’s MVP waits for the staggering larger man and leaps up and drives him face first into the ringside mats with a Slice of Fried Gold! Dusting himself off and spitting on the refuse of his enemy in love, Hutch turns his attention towards the ring and starts doing what FIW’s Evolution of Excellence was doing earlier. Unfortunately for Hutch, his little out burst results in Tony calling for FIW’s Leading Lady to break the hold now that FIW’s Feline Fighter’s legs are in the ropes. There are a few jeers for the fact she holds onto it till the count of three, finally releasing it and backing away from the champion to let him get to his feet peacefully. JH: I hope Hutch is happy with himself! He has disturbed the whole flow of this match! CL: I’m sure he’ll be able to sleep tonight, especially if Kennedy ends up winning this and rewards him for his support by joining him in bed. CM: That…would be WAY better than a Thank You card! Only after he is up to his feet and starting to stand up straight that the challenger strikes, going for a lariat that the champion ducks under and spins around to meet her with the back of his fist! The blow jars FIW’s Leading Lady and she nearly falls over, she doesn’t because XK scoops her up and twirls the two of them right around to gain momentum into a spine buster! Kennedy arches her back and let’s out a pained scream, all that Hutch can possibly do is watch on with quite a bit of conflict playing out across his face about what else he can do. To add insult to injury mentally speaking, FIW’s Feline Fighter looks straight at the other potential contender at ringside and mockingly shows sympathy for his foe’s troubles. CL: Quick way to piss a fellow man off, tease him about how helpless he is to help his crush. CM: I can say I envy Kitten, being on top of Kennedy like that, even if it is because of…that…move. JH: What? His Uraken? Easily getting back up, along the way XK gets a handful of Kennedy’s hair and yanks her up into a quasi-sitting position on the mat and drives a knee right into her face! The knee strike causes a small twitch in Hutch’s right eye and the entire time Kitten is staring right at him as he does it to her. This game is far from over, seeing as the champion drives his knee right into the face of the challenger again, hitting a second knee strike and staring right at FIW’s MVP. Hutch’s knuckles are turning white he is clenching his fists so tightly as he just stands and watches while FIW’s Feline Fighter connects with a third knee strike! CM: Why is Hutch being such a wuss?! Go in there and save her if you want her to be your girl! JH: I think it is taking every thing in Hutch’s will power NOT to do just that Chip, because he knows how important this match is. As well as how important and big of a deal it would be if Kennedy became the top dog in the company after four years since she was before. CL: To be fair, she was the co-top dog then as Slam had a champion on equal par with her at the time too…okay, I can’t say that with a straight face, sorry, let me try again. Further goading Hutch on to do some thing, the champion taunts towards the man at ringside to get in the ring before driving his knee into the challenger’s face yet again! Bringing her up to her feet on her spaghetti legs, XK whips FIW’s Leading Lady right into the ropes with as much force as he can muster to put behind it. The Original Hellcat rebounds off of them and comes rushing back, leaping into the air to try and turn the tides with a cross body! Sadly, FIW’s Feline Fighter with ease catches her in his arms and turns them around so that he can face the Grand Slam Man when he launches Kennedy over head with a fall away slam! JH: Look at the sheer strength of Xtreme Kitten! CL: Yes, because a male professional wrestler holding and tossing around one hundred and some change is impressive… CM: Maybe not, but it certainly is fun to watch…Weeee! There she goes…and…belly flop! Scurrying over to her FIW’s Feline Fighter signals that he can do one better and he picks her back up to her feet and throws one of her arms over his neck. Gently Kitten wraps an arm around the back of her neck, and snatches hold of her pants and with relative ease lifts her up into the air. With a wave of his hand the champion gets the crowd to count along to the seconds he holds the challenger up in the air for, his green eyes locked on Hutch at ringside. They do as requested of them and count, and continue to count even when it reaches into the fifties and a few start to applaud as the stalling suplex nears an entire minute. CL: Alright…so that’s a little impressive. CM: That might be a new record! JH: I’m not sure it is a wise move to be messing with Hutch this much, let alone toying around with a wrestler as dangerous as Kennedy can be. Climaxing, the champion throws the two of them backwards falling and the challenger lands hard back first against the canvas without any remorse whatsoever to the drop! Now nearly the entire arena is applauding and cheering on the efforts of XK, who rolls up onto a knee and makes sure to check Hutch’s expression over it before continuing on with the match. FIW’s MVP is now sporting white knuckles and ruining that picture perfect smirk of his by gritting and grinding his teeth, glaring as darkly as possible at the man in the ring. Once their brief little stare down is finished, Xtreme Kitten turns his attention back to his opponent and proceeds to start to bring her back up to a vertical base. CM: Hutch has the whole Popeye look going on…is that intentional, you think? JH: Popeye? …How does he even remotely look like that cartoon character? CL: Well, I can actually kinda see it, with the gritting of his teeth and his fists, and that glare that is giving him a partially closed eye…Still no Robin Williams, that’s for fucking sure. Being led by her hair, the Original Hellcat can do nothing but obey where XK puts her and that includes sticking her head in between his legs in a standing head scissors. Wrapping his arms around her waist tightly, the champion lifts up the challenger’s lower half into the air and turns the two all the way around for every one to witness her position. FIW’s Feline Fighter stops when they are directly facing her corner and the man standing in it, a wicked smiled crossing the lips of the aforementioned fighter when he jumps up! Down the two plummet towards the mat with Hutch watching them, and Kennedy gets for her troubles being spiked right on the top of her head by Kitten in a jumping piledriver! JH: Kitten’s Meow! Good lord, Kitten’s Meow! CL: Christ, talk about trying to paralyze some body. CM: Now THAT was nice. Surprisingly XK doesn’t go for the cover; instead he pushes the Original Hellcat away from him to allow him to get back up to his feet easier than with her near. FIW’s Leading Lady gets checked on by Clarke who bends down while Kitten struts over to the other side of the ring with a smug smirk. To a smattering of jeers the champion taunts for the Grand Slam Man to get in the ring and do some thing about it if it bothers him so much to see it. Nothing comes about it and Xtreme Kitten waves him off, turning around and starting to walk back over to where Kennedy and Tony are in the ring. Except, he never gets there because a hand whips him around and grabs him, and brings him down to the mat with a Slice of Fried Gold! CL: Ha! I think the young punks now a days would call that getting knocked the fuck out! CM: Yay! I knew some where in there Hutch still had balls! JH: A Slice of Fried Gold right underneath the referee’s nose! Like a thief in the night FIW’s MVP does the maneuver and rolls out of the ring, resting back where he was near the apron in one fluid effortless motion to an eruption of cheers! Hutch tries his best to act casual when Clarke turns around and suddenly finds Xtreme Kitten completely knocked out near the area of the ring Kennedy’s corner and him are. So many eyes are focused on the senior official they barely notice the Original Hellcat stirring, and starting to crawl towards the fallen form of her opponent in this match. Not knowing or maybe not caring what happened, FIW’s Leading Lady slings her arm over the limp body and Tony starts the count! CM: Hutch just promised Kennedy a title reign! Talk about a gift to show you care! JH: Even if I don’t approve of those actions Hutch took, I am excited for we may see a new champion crowned right now! [align=center]1![/align] CL: Damn fucking right! Hutch grew a pair and now Kennedy might have a pair of belts to go with them! CM: Count faster, you stupid referee! [align=center]2![/align] JH: If this is it Kitten has nothing to be ashamed of, he put on one helluva fight! CL: And, was attacked by a illegal party. [align=center]THRE-NO! FOOT ON THE ROPES![/align] CM: Aw, bummer. JH: That was extremely close, pun not withstanding! A collective sigh of relief from the tension goes across the entire arena, followed shortly by Hutch cursing under his breath and making a mental note to MOVE the body next time. However if there will be a next time is questionable, considering behind him Prime is stirring and getting to his feet as he clutches a hold of his very sore head that is thanks to a certain some one. This certain some one the Evolution of Excellence returns the favor to by smashing him on the back of the head with a polish hammer, followed quickly by a backdrop suplex! Mean while in the ring Clarke shows the Original Hellcat that it was only a two count technically and that the match is continuing, much to her own disappointment. JH: Jeez! Prime nearly spiked Hutch onto the back of his neck just now! CL: A lovers spat by the looks of it. CM: Hutch and Prime are queer?! Willing her body back up through the aches and pain it is feeling from the match, Miss Sommers patiently waits her foe’s rise much like her own to his feet. He takes a little longer than her but Kitten eventually starts shrug off the side effects of the Slice of Fried Gold, bad news for him. Because when he turns around his feet is greeted by the side of Kennedy’s boot in a roundhouse kick that’s core of abuse goes straight to the temple of the champion! As this occurs, Hutch scrambling up to his dazed feet and jabs the much larger man right in the eye and almost rips it out during the eye poke for good measure! CL: Talk about utter fucking chaos! CM: Oh! Oh! It’s that kick thing she does! What is it called…the Washington? The Lincoln? …Erm, the Roosevelt? Maybe the Fran- JH: The J-F-K! That’s sent Kitten to his knees! Running right at the champion as he starts to stir a bit and tries valiantly to shake off the effects of the kick, the challenger leaps up and with her leg brings him face first into the mat! While in the ringside area the Grand Slam Man tries to pepper the Adonis of a rival with open hand slaps to further frustrate and confuse him after that eye gorging poke. Fighting through the confusion and frustration, FIW’s Evolution of Excellence returns the favor with a lariat that almost sends the smaller man into a four hundred and fifty degree flip in the air. Prime starts to turn his attention back into the ring and takes a few steps towards the apron only to fall face first into it, thanks to a drop toe hold by FIW’s MVP! CM: That one’s called…the Sexy Hiney Drop, right? Mmmhmmm…hiney… JH: No, it’s the Clincher! CL: Should we just get it over with and call what Hutch and Prime are doing a cat fight? It’s getting to that fucking point, I swear, if I see hair pulling or some thing like that I’m walking. Relentlessly the Original Hellcat drops down over FIW’s Feline Fighter and slips her arms past his shoulders, a few outbursts from the crowd as they know what’s coming. That is, they thought they knew what was coming, since Kitten brings up his arms and tries his hardest in a dazed state to prevent the submission from being locked in on his neck. FIW’s Leading Lady tries to slap away his arms and slip under them though the champion isn’t making things quite that easy for her and trying to bat her arms away. As all of this is going on Hutch calmly gets up and dusts himself off again, stepping over Prime and trying to reach the apron to resume rooting on “his gal”. JH: If she locks in the Wicked Lullaby after that combination it has to be over! CL: Which would be why Kitten is trying to stop that from happening. CM: Please Kitten! I know we haven’t seen eye to eye…for…well…months, but not another submission, please stop it! Out of his figurative sleeve Kitten pulls a trump card, flinging back his head and ramming it right into the jaw of Kennedy being that card to use as a last resort! Before FIW’s MVP can reach the apron to witness this trump card a gigantic hand grabs him by the tights and pulls him back away from it, and emerges in between the apron and him. Not even giving time for protest, Kennedy’s supposed Adonis delivers a reeling head butt and immediately goes and performs a picture perfect Alpha Bomb on the floor to Hutch! With his rival writhing on the ground, FIW’s Evolution of Excellence takes his place back at the apron in Kennedy’s corner and rooting her on there from afar. CL: Shit, if she’s not careful she could’ve bitten her tongue right off with that head butt! CM: Who cares? All that means is that she’d be a hot chick that couldn’t talk…or complain…ah, the dream girl. JH: Sorry, some of us actually like women who can speak their minds. Getting back up to his feet and shaking the cobwebs out of his head, the champion picks up the dazed challenger and brings her back up to her feet only to whip her into the ropes! In mid-run towards them Kennedy springs into the air and lands right on top of the middle rope, pressing her weight down on it and spring boarding off of it and back towards XK! Her legs wrap around his neck and attempt to use all of the momentum and velocity to hurricanrana him right out of the shoes…except he holds his ground and grabs her! Many portions of the fans explode into amazed cheers when FIW’s Feline Fighter takes a few steps with her in hand, lifting her right up and driving her down into the mat with a powerbomb! CM: Wow! Don’t see those every day from the freak! JH: That HurraKennedy was denied and instead she got a powerbomb for her troubles! CL: These two are fucking each other up, that’s for sure. Amazingly he’s not done, the champion with some what ease pulls the dangling body of his challenger back up into position for another powerbomb to a mixed reaction! Prime pounds his fists against the apron and tries his hardest to root on the Original Hellcat, some thing that seems to be the remedy she needed. Pouncing back to life and flinging fists repeatedly down onto the head of XK, she sends him stumbling and staggering with her on him! Eventually she pauses in her series of punches to add insult to injury that gets a big cheer; she flips off Kitten and then quickly flings her body back and hitting a hurracanrana! JH: THERE is the HurraKennedy! CL: Plus a little some thing extra for Kitten’s troubles. CM: Yes! That was cool! Spinning through the hurricanrana, the Original Hellcat gets to her feet and patiently awaits Kitten to do the very same, and calls for the end of the match to cheers from the fans. Gradually the champion comes to and starts to get up, getting up to one knee when the challenger makes her sprint towards him as fast as her legs can carry her across the ring. Prime is nearly jumping into the air for joy as Kennedy looks to scale up Xtreme Kitten’s knee…that is until Xtreme Kitten side steps her and leaps straight into the air! As she turns to react to this new development she finds a boot meeting the top of her head in a Pelé Kick to another eruption of cheers from the fans and Prime flinches slightly. CL: Pelé Kick to the rescue! CM: One of the two moves Kitten gets any air on, he truly is the whitest man alive. JH: These two are going tit for tat, it is any one’s ball game ladies and gentlemen! Prime sees some thing out of the corner of his eye and it seems to make him even more conflicted on what to do than before, looking towards the fallen Kennedy. XK rolls up onto a knee and calls for the Cat Kick to yet again the majority of the arena cheering him on, slowly he gets up to his feet. With a handful of hair, the champion brings the challenger back up to her feet once again too and yet again whips her towards the ropes…only for her to reverse it in mid-run! The abrupt jar of it makes her bump into Tony Clarke, who because of this doesn’t even see Prime hop onto the apron that Kitten is running towards! CM: And, now Prime’s found his balls! JH: What does Prime have in his hands…? CL: It looks like…Yup! It’s a fucking chair! Holding it high above his head now, FIW’s Evolution of Excellence looks to bring it down upon the skull of the reigning FIW Dual Crown Champion. A crack rings out through the arena and several fans gasp in horror because Prime certainly hit some one…just not Xtreme Kitten. Diving out of the way of the blast and near tackling Clarke down by accident in the process, XK left it wide open for Kennedy to take the full blunt of the steel chair! Prime can only look on in horror at what he’s done till FIW’s Feline Fighter running pump kicks the steel chair right into his face and sends him flying off the apron! JH: DAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNGERRRRRRRRROOOOOUUUSSSS~!!! CL: Fuck! Prime hit Kennedy and then got a Cat Kick for his troubles! CM: Uh oh…Look at Kennedy! She’s- CL: BLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOD~!!! Indeed, a small crimson trickle is running down from her hair line and into her eyes, leaving her wide open for an attack of any kind by her opponent. Unfortunately for her, Kitten picks her up and places her up onto his shoulders with her blood stained eyes staring up at the lights. In a matter of a mere second the champion lifts her up off of his shoulders and drives her skull first into the canvas to another explosion of cheers from the fans in attendance! Tony regains his bearings after the two shoves and drops down to his knees, and begins the count as soon as Kitten floats over into the cover and hooks both legs! CL: Cat’s Meow! CM: Ow-ow-ow-ow-OOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUCH~!!! [align=center]1![/align] JH: After that chair shot he might’ve just had to cover her for it to be it but with a Cat’s Meow I can’t see how she’s getting up! CL: Then again as you’ve said yourself, she’s been put through hell before and come back to win so it could happen. [align=center]2![/align] CM: Looks like we found some thing Hutch is better at than Prime, so that’s some thing to be positive about. JH: I don’t see how being good at outside and illegal interference is a good thing. [align=center]3~!!! DING DING DING~!!![/align] MA: Here is your winner by pin fall…and STILL FIW Dual Crown Champion…XXXXXXXXXXTRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEMMMMMMMMMMME KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNN~!!! The champion’s music hits the sound system and he rolls off of the lifeless body of Kennedy, Clarke raising his arm in victory and presenting him with the belts. Kitten gets to his feet and staggers a bit, shaking the cobwebs out of his head as he lifts both title belts into the air to cheers. Their cheers that soon to a chorus of jeers and XK turns around and finds out why, the presence of Kiyoshi Nakahata and Onikage up on the entrance stage staring down at him. Mockingly FIW’s Morning Star applauds his former team mate’s efforts while he stands beside the stone like face of the challenger for the belts at Violence Fetish. Neither party noticing Hutch stirring at ringside, and in his dazed state seeing Prime with the steel chair on the floor and the bloody Kennedy inside the ring. CM: Crap! More freaks! JH: What a night it’s been! With surprises and twists around every corner, and it looks like Kiyoshi is keeping an eye on his competition come Violence Fetish! CL: Not to mention Hutch looks like he’s getting the wrong idea on what happened in the closing moments. There are a lot of fucking developments that we can’t cover any more because we are all out of time…For Chip and Hitchen, I’m Constance, we’ll see you next week…You wouldn’t FUCKING DARE miss it!
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2:15 PM Jul 11