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The Beasts from the East (and South); ~ A Momoko / Blondie Production ~
Topic Started: Aug 7 2007, 09:17 PM (35 Views)
xwca
Unregistered

X Hits; but not the storming dual-guitar riff practised by hide and Pata, or even Keita and Jun. No, this is worse. Much worse. This is the MIDI version; the kind found on mobile phone ring-tones, such as the one currently in possession of Mr. Blond, which is currently informing the Peroxide Outlaw that the Boss is trying to get hold of him. Blondie is sitting in the back of a limousine, about to light up a cigarillo. The ringing phone stays his hand just short, that and a glare from the person sitting next to him. That, and she seems to be filing her nails to a sharp point, to better claw his* eyes out. Momoko Wakari takes a dim view of smoking, it seems, especially in the confined space of the limo.

Mr. Blond: Hey, boss, what up? ... Yeah, we' on ah way. ... Aww hell yeah, Ah'm lookin' forward to it. Tha' Jaime Lee's mah-tee fahne, ya know? Been lookin' forward ta gettin' mah hands on- ... Whaddaya mean stay focused?

A frown clouds Blond's sunny disposition. He avoids the rain, falling on his parade by moving the phone away from his ear. Seconds pass before he braves it again. It's finally safe to come out.

Mr. Blond: Yeah yeah, Boss; be cool, it's all gon' be faine an' good. We tha ones tha' won tha tag titles in the first place, 'member? ... Naw, boss, Ah'm not implah'n' nothin'. ... Ok, ok. These girls' only gon' be a bother if tha ref counts a li'l fast when one'a them 'ranas me, ya dig. Hur hur hu-

Once more, he gets berated by the boss. He crinkles his nose, and holds the phone out to Momoko.

Mr. Blond: I's fo' yew.

The Pink-Haired Demon looks over non-chalantly toward her Zaibatsu co-hort and places her nail file by her side as she clasps her ivory-pale fingers around the phone and places it against her ear

Miss Wakari: Moshi-moshi?

Momoko listens on the other end for a while, nodding her head slightly in response to Daisuke on the other end

Miss Wakari: Hai... genki desu.

Blondie rolls down the window, and finally decides to brave lighting up his thin cigar, as she listens to Daisuke's response on the other end

Miss Wakari: Daijoubu, ie desu yo. Hai... domo arigato gozaimashita, Tanaka-san.

She hands the mobile phone back to her quiff-sporting cohort, who finally has a flame going from his lighter.

Miss Wakari: Dai-Chan says good luck to us both and wants us to "eviscerate those unintelligable marsh eels by whatever method would suit your respective intellectual tastes".

And with that, Blondie sees no further reason to continue the conversation with Mr. the Crow. Momoko sighs through her nose as Blondie puts the phone down back to the Hammerspace where he keeps his grooming gear, unlike his pink-haired cohorts arsenal of melee weaponry, and picks her nail file back up...

Miss Wakari: I don't think I've encountered a situation which has Dai-Chan so... aggravated.

Knowing that the situation has absolutely nothing to do with him, whatsoever, Blondie shrugs his shoulders and takes great care exhale all the smoke outside the window.

Miss Wakari: ...I mean, Revolution's pretentious fan-hugging aside, he seems more concerned about whether we win or lose this match than any of the others.

The Pink-Haired Demon looks over her shoulder as she slowly begins to resume filing her nails, seeing that Blondie isn't paying that much attention to her.

Miss Wakari: Or doesn't that concern you?

Mr. Blond: Eh, wha's the problem? Two babes out of one'a them teen drama's tha' mah li'l bru spends way too much tahme watchin'; don' get me wrong, they babes right? An' gettin' mah hands on them's gon' be loadsa fun, an' Ah can't wait, right?But come on! Jus' tell one'a them they crush is at ringside, an' we already halved tha problem... Ya dig?

Miss Wakari: I think there might be a little bit more to Dai-Chan's concern than who they get fangirlgasms for...

Mr. Blond: He's jus' bittah tha' one'a them's going fo' tha wrong damn wannabe ninja, or somethin'. Hell do Ah know? Ah gave up trah'na und'stand him tha moment he started payin' me.

Momoko raises a quizzical eyebrow before just sighing at the pointlessness of inquiring further to her quiff-sporting compatriot's reasons and morality (or therefore of) to the situation, resuming giving her nails the appropriate attention they deserve...

Miss Wakari: I still think you should take this a little more seriously, but... given neither of those round-eyed devils, no offense, seem concerned about us either I suppose we should follow suit. Unless, of course, it's all a ploy to decieve us on account of how they really think about facing you and I.

Mr. Blond: Yeah, but have ya actu'ly seen 'em wrassle? Ah have... Ya know, uh... Researchin' an' stuff...

Awkwardly, Mr. Blond taps ash out of the window; not quite blushing, but trying his damndest not too. Momoko gives an ambivilant glance to the Southerner by her side... one part puzzlement at his statement, the other suspicion at what he meant by such a statement.

Miss Wakari: What are you trying to imply about me... Mister Blond?

The awkwardness of the silence is not helped by the fact Mr. Blond waits a long moment, before taking as long a drag on his cigarillo as he possibly can without destroying his cool and coughing. In the fullness of time, he lets it out of the window, and blinks a few times as oxygen returns to his body.

Mr. Blond: Ah's merely 'bout ta point out tha' we ain' dealin' wi' wrasslers, we go' be up 'gainst angst ridden chicks, uh... women? And uh, they don' wrassle's much as fling theyselves off stuff, and kick an' stuff...

Still flustered a little, he takes another, much more calming lungful.

Mr. Blond: Mah point bein' tha' we gon' hafta wait fo' them ta miss, then choke 'em out & carve 'em up, o' whatever we want. Hell, we could pull tha "hey lookie here, ya crush is ovah they'" trick ta divahde 'n' conquah... Ya Dig?

Momoko stays silent for a few moments for her brain to hot-wire into action to decypher the drawling mumbles of Blondie before just rolling her eyes as she comes to the conclusion that it wouldn't be worth her time to delve any further...

Miss Wakari: Fine, whatever... just do me a favour and keep that lucha bitch off my back, will you? She gives me bad vibes everytime I look at her...

Mr. Blond: Wi' pleh-zhure, ma'am; Ah'da prefered tha' one anyway, she ain' so cuddly an gooey an' mopey an' shit. Plus Ah bin Dah-in' ta rip her mask off. She gotta have a pretty face under it, if ya squint, ya just make out bits o' it; plus wi' a body... Uh, an' a voice lahka tha'; ya jus' know she does.

Although appearing somewhat weirded out by Blondie voicing his sordid fantasies of the Ozzie/Vato luchadore, Momoko surprisingly maintains her composure for the time being

Miss Wakari: Right, you... do whatever you please, just as long as I'm not within ear-shot or have to look at it.

Mr. Blond: Hur Hur Hur... Ah'll see what Ah can do, gon' drag her all tha way back ta tha locker-room, if Ah can.

Lecherous guffawing follows. Lots of lecherous guffawing.

Miss Wakari: Right... OK... are we there yet? I'm famished.

Eventually the limo stops before the buzzing sound of an intercom-style device is heard and an annoying Valley girl accent pounds in our ears...

Cashier: Welcome to Burger King! May I take your order?


[size0]* His, or anyone else's. Momoko has never discriminated on that score.
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