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| Dead or Alive, Can't Live in the Past; Daisuke has Only One Way to Live | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Dec 1 2007, 04:05 AM (41 Views) | |
| Dai | Dec 1 2007, 04:05 AM Post #1 |
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Captain SPARKLE~!!!
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As a general rule, it wouldn't generally be thought of as a good idea to walk the streets of Mexico City alone. This doesn't seem to be a major consideration of our subject for the day, a Nikon-toting Japanese Tourist by the name of Jun Kimura. This name may be familiar to some, but to the rest, a brief description of the man is in order. He wears his black hair as long as possible, which due to some nasty split ends is 'only' half way down his back at the moment. At this particular juncture, he also appears to be heterochromic; one brown eye, the other grey; although this is because one of his brown contacts* fell out stepping off the plane at the airport. The final striking feature about the man, and the main reason why few would accost him, is his size. An inch over Six Feet tall is nothing too outlandish, but 280lb of person usually is, especially when only a minimum of it is fat. After a few hours seeing the sights of the city, Kimura makes for the scenic gardens surrounding one of the city's major museums, where he would not only be able to relax, but also keep an important meeting. Deciding that ideally, he doesn't want too much of a sunburn, he selects a suitable tree to sit under. Despite drawing out his camera, to inspect the pictures he's taken, and actually turning the thing on [which does take an unnecessarily long time,] he notices something up in the tree, and shouts up at it, in Japanese, but thankfully subtitled. Kimura: I see America hasn't killed your flair for the dramatic. There's a rustle from above him, as a certain wannabe ninja discovers that he's been rumbled. The colour/voice should make it obvious who exactly is in the tree, but I won't give it away just yet. ???: Hiding in trees is my only link to the old days at the moment. It reminds me of the fun times before we grew up. You would, I take it, prefer that I abandoned all my eccentricities? Kimura: Thousands have tried, Tanaka Daisuke, I think we would have succeeded by now that we could. Not that life would be any fun if you and Keita dropped that daft ninja schtick. Well there's the mystery solved who he's talking about. Daisuke 'The Crow' Tanaka, eccentric rich brat that he is, drops out of the tree wearing his ninja/wrestling gear, and sits back against the tree, facing 90 degrees away from Kimura. Kimura: And I'm sure that it wouldn't hurt if Keita grew up enough to join us both in an adult conversation, would it? ???: Nah man, I'm Peter Pan for this new generation. I'm never growing up. Right on cue, both Kimura and Daisuke roll their eyes. The two aren't even looking at each other, and still they manage to time it perfectly, although it might not be so much timed as a reflex honed by years of practice. After some inaudiable grumbling, Keita Ijima, the other Super Ninja drops down, and rolls back into a seated position against the tree. Kimura: So why did you call us out to the middle of the city? Knowing you, you already know why we're here. In fact, I would go so far as to suggest that you are the reason Keita managed to get us Front Row seats. Daisuke: Are you suggesting that I need a reason to catch up with my sworn brothers? What use is a worldwide spy network, if I do not use it to keep a track of what my true friends are doing with themselves? The one called the Dragon Lord, for the Dragon allegedly imprisoned in his right arm,** rolls his eyes again, and smiles; although unable to tell with real certainty whether Daisuke is joking about the spies. Kimura: I suppose you could try using this world-wide network of spies to keep a track of people that you aren't in the habit of having regular phone-calls and IM conversations with. I hear it's actually worth your time watching you back these days. Pissing off people left, right and centre. Daisuke grunts out a sound that could be an aborted laugh, although being Daisuke, it might not be. He seems pleased that Jun's been taking an interest, although he tries to pass it off as nothing. Daisuke: It is worth my time paying someone to watch my back. I still have better things to do with my own time, such as improve my haiku writing, origami and hiding in trees. Fortunately for me, I have a moderately competant man doing exactly that, leaving me to find a good rhyme for 'Black Sunset' on my own. Keita: Good God man, you've been looking for a good rhyme for Black Sunset for the last 15 years! Please at least tell me you can make more than a crane and a shruiken out of paper. The Crow's response has his tongue as firmly in his cheek as his Super Ninja brother's was when he first commented on Daisuke's [lack of,] artistic prowess. Daisuke: I will have you know that I have mastered the art of the paper horse. The Unicorn is coming along slower than perhaps I would have liked, because I have been a little busy. I will also have you know that sitting through Messrs. Arroyo and Patterson's little skits is a tiring - not to mention tiresome - chore that constitutes a large portion of my week. Keita: Ya think? I reckon those guys are pretty funny. They pretty much got your tricks nailed in that last one. Man, wish I'd thought of that PCP trick on an opponent I didn't want to fight. Kimura: You mean it wouldn't be easier to have one arrested for sexual harrassment, and then wait for the other to kill himself? If that fails, you could always hire Hiro Nakamura to go back in time to eat their parents brains. This last line was a mistake. Keita actually is a fan of Heroes, even if Jun isn't. Daisuke doesn't care either way and just chuckles as they bicker. Keita: It's not Hiro who- Kimura: I Dont Care! I hate that idiot program. The only way they could save it is by grafting adamantium to the cheerleader's skeleton, and even, they don't have a decent Sabertooth to pull the true Wolverine rip-off - sorry, homage - off properly. "Philistine" is what Keita mutters under his breath in English at Jun, who rolls his eyes for possibly the tenth time so far. The argument is an old one, and neither thought it was worth it the first time. At the Five Hundred and First time, it's even more of a waste of time. Daisuke: These are all interesting ideas. Would either of you know where I could find one of these brain-eating mutants to set to work on my rivals? Or in the event that such things are fictional, a new way of dealing with them, since my current methods only seem to enrage them, and make them persistant, if not any more effective. Keita: You could just try and be less of a dick, you know? Daisuke: You mean that I should be civil with these ingrates? Why on earth should I do that? Should I smile and nod through their incessant prattle about how much of an odd couple, yet a capable team they are? This is despite having never coming close to actually earning a shot based on skill. They tickle the funny bones of the unwashed masses, and they enrage those conservative bible-thumpers.*** Any drone can do that. Keita: They don't offend your delicate sensibilities? Daisuke: Gods, no. They irritate me, and that Arroyo's psycho-sexual discomfort tactics really do work, but really, all that really sticks in my craw is that lowest common denominator drivel they spout on a regular basis. The best analogy is that of the skilled drama writer whose smagnum opus is dangerously near being cut for some trashy reality program. I refuse to allow my craft to be trampled by this, you see? Keita almost scoffs at this, lightly mocking what Daisuke's just said. Keita: Your craft? All you do these days is cheat, and laugh down at people. Hell, you know we're mostly here for Kiyoshi, right? Kimura: Hey, less of that, Keita. We came to see the pair of them. Meanwhile, a slightly deflated Daisuke slumps back against the tree, and just this once his haughty manner of speaking slips a bit. Daisuke: No, he's right, Jun... But I just can't do that Super Ninja stuff any more, you see? I just don't have the strength in both my knees to go over for the Minoru Special II and if I don't land the UNIT 03 or the UNIT 01 right then I might never even walk again.^ The rich-kid heel thing is just about the only other thing I can do well enough to justify carrying on wrestling... That puts Keita in his place. He mumbles an apology, because he does feel a little bit of a twat by now. Still, Daisuke carries on. Daisuke: I try, you know? It'd be so easy just to be another evil foriegner or something like that; but apart from little flashes here and there, I'm never going to be quite the same wrestler I was... So if I can't be a super awesome wrestler any more, then all I can really do instead is be a super awesome heel... He trails off and caws his cawing laugh. He leans over towards Keita, as his 'usual' manner of speaking returns. Daisuke: No need to worry about me though. These bottom feeding scum think that they know how Tanaka Daisuke fights? I can still slap a Jujigatame on them faster than they can blink. If they want a bloody, sweaty slog to my Tag Titles, then they can keep it for themselves; I have tricks and schemes that they cannot begin to understand, not even if they watched me for a thousand years. I remember the awed applause we got back in the day as the Super Ninja; I remember how alive it made us feel... He grins and lowers his voice even more... Daisuke: But an arena full of people hating every little molecule of your being; walking through them, hating them back... A different feeling, but more alive than I have been since the accident... Keita seems apprehensive of the darkness in his voice, but comes round by the end of it. It's at this point that a certain Peroxide Outlaw, having left his usual jacket in his hotel room, instead just content with a shirt and tie in this Mexican winter, arrives on the scene. Mr. Blond: Hey boss; it's time. The Boss nods and stands up, with an uncharacteristic display of affection for both Jun and Keita; a hug for each of them. Closing pleasantries are exchanged: goodbyes, see-you-at-the-shows, even a how's-your-brother? from Keita to Blondie; but we fade out as these occur... [size0]* Many people mistakenly believe that brown is his natural eye colour, with grey contacts worn for effect. It's actually the other way round. The eyes have been something of a worry for him for many years, having been bullied while younger about them. He solved the problem by the twin expedients of coloured lenses and being big enough to pound anyone who gave him guff about them. He mostly gave up on the lenses at around the age of 14 when an odd looking boy transferred to his school by the name of Kiyoshi Nakahata; but he still wears them when visiting strange new places, like Mexico City. ** Jun Kimura is famous for his Lariat. Kiyoshi is reckoned to have a fine Lariat but Kimura's is legendary even at the age of 26. Kiyoshi has one advantage over Kimura in that his Lariat is equally strong with either arm, while all of Kimura's power comes from his Right arm. *** Nominally, Daisuke is Shinto, although he only really takes the Anscestor Veneration part seriously. Most of the rest of it, he tends to ignore, although he does observe most of the major festivals. Islam, Judeasm and Christianity just annoy him though, and to a lesser extent Hinduism. Buddhism, he's ok with. As an interesting aside, most of Daisuke's family is nominally Christian, his father attending church on a semi regular basis, and his older sister having been married at a Christian ceremony. ^ The Minoru Special II is a Northern Lights Suplex, flipped into a Jujigatame, the UNIT 03 is a Springboard Frontflip Busaikuu Knee, and the UNIT 01 is a Frontflip Busaikuu Knee into the corner, followed by the Schwein. The UNIT 01 and UNIT 03 are so named because they look like the front-flip kicks that both of those Eva units do in NGE. |
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