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| Padraig O'Dim; Blake has a penchant for Demons | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Mar 25 2008, 02:44 PM (65 Views) | |
| Poirot | Mar 25 2008, 02:44 PM Post #1 |
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[We starwipe open to a rather stylish bar. The camera focused on one Blake Orange. Blake is sitting down at the bar, a glass filled with the awful cocktail of Oozo and Gin, topped with Blackcurrant and Lucozade, a little salt around the rim and a nice little pink umbrella in the glass. Blake is wearing a designer jacket over a rather loud blue Hawaiian shirt this time round, the dim light from the lamp is reflecting on his Orange Family Crest pin, and in the vein of Corey Hart, Blake is wearing his sunglasses even though it is approximately 1:00am. Blake has checked into The Hilton on Park Lane. After his disappointing match with Dragon, Blake is longing for a half-way decent debut match. A camera pans to reveal that Blake is watching the cast of Friends exchanging their extremely unfunny jokes.] Rachael: I'm pregnant for the five millionth time, go me! Monkey: OH OH AH! Rachael: WITH HIS CHILD! [Canned laughter.] Blake Orange: Hahahaha!!!! Chandler: Could I *be* any more etc etc? [Blake guffaws like an idiot.] Blake Orange: Haw! Haw! Haw! [More canned laughter. Blake, almost out of breath from laughing himself silly, removes his sunglasses and wipes a tear from his eye and turns to face the cameraman.] Blake Orange: Oh mister cameraman - truly I have been missing out all these years. Forget penicillin, forget the poetry of TS Eliot, hell, screw the Roman Empire! Human culture has reached its zenith with Friends! What do you think my friend? [The cameraman shrugs his shoulders.] Cameraman: I always prefered Peter Kay to be honest - garlic bread! Blake Orange: ...what? [Quickly moving on, Blake takes a sip of his awful cocktail and a grimace crosses his face as he places it back on the bar. After motioning for the barman to take his drink away, Blake throws down a twenty dollar bill on the bar as the barman eyes it suspiciously.] Blake Orange: Take it or leave it tommy. [The barman decides to cut his losses and pockets the money for himself. Blake turns back to the camera.] Blake Orange: After my amazing performance on Monday, running rings around that foolish little Texan, I hoped and prayed that my cries would be heard and I would be granted a credible match. An epic battle with a worthy opponent for my first pay-per-view appearance. But no! The masterminds in management put me in a rematch with him! Tell me mister cameraman, what gracious task has The Dragon completed to warrant a rematch against Blake Orange? But my other (and more important) question is what heinous task have I, Blake Orange unknowingly committed to be punished with another crapfest with this man!? Has my career sunk THAT low that I'm reduced to piddling my talents and my ring repetior to Texans with no personality? Does that sound fair to YOU mister cameraman!? Cameraman: erm... no, I guess not. Blake Orange: That's right. That's why I've decided to call a meeting here with my legal advice. Mr. Padraig O'Dim of the law firm - King, Lovecraft & Poe. Cameraman: It's a little late for a legal meeting ain't it? Blake Orange: He's a strange man, from Maine I believe. For some reason he'll only meet me at night and I often catch him mumbling about towers and cowboys, but he's been my family's lawyer for generations. I suppose he must be getting on a little bit now. [Speak of the devil and he will appear. The oak doors to the lounge swing open to reveal a rather sinister looking figure. His slimy jet black hair is slicked right back to his scalp and he is clad in a grey pinstripe suit with a red tie and red socks - His eyes are almost glowing omniously crimson and oddly the scent of matches accompanies him into the bar. Contrary to Blake's statement about him "getting on a bit", this man appears no older than thirty. He notices Blake and the cameraman and shows off his razored teeth as he gives them both a rather forbidding smile. This is Blake's lawyer - Padraig O'Dim.] Cameraman: *gulp* [Padraig approaches the two men sitting at the bar, after a hearty handshake with Blake, he shakes the cameraman's hand. Our cameraman is starting to wish he hadn't taken this job, despite the extra pay for working unsociable hours.] Blake Orange: Padraig! You have to do something! They've put me in a rematch against this moron - The Dragon! I beat his ass halfway to Marioland and back and they've put me up against him AGAIN next week in this Anarchy In The UK show! I was supposed to be at a meeting with Sir Alan Sugar this afternoon but as I'm distraght, I've been in this hotel bar all day! And they tried forcing these "exotic" cocktails on me, but they're just awful! As my family's lawyer Padraig - I am looking for you to sort this travesty out! Camerman: The cocktails? Blake Orange: No you fool! The match against The Dragon. I'm supposed to be moving UP in the FIW not staying in the same place. I deserve better than this. I want a different opponent, a BETTER opponent. I want to be pushed to the limit! To show that I am worthy of more! I want it fixed Padraig. NOW! [Padraig O'Dim begins to speak and you can probably bet, with some assurance, that somebody somewhere is being plauged by a terrible nightmare involving mountains and madness.] Padraig O'Dim: Blake relax, I have already fixed it for you. Blake Orange: You have? When? What did you do? Padraig O'Dim: You know how persuasive I can be. I simply stated to management that if you were not given an opponent of some crediblity, then they would come to regret it in due time. Blake Orange: Excellent. So who did you get for me? A Dual Crown title shot with Kiyoshi Nakahata? Padraig O'Dim: Not exactly Blake... Blake Orange: Oh, nevermind, I suppose it will be a battle of weaponry between myself and Grant Rice for the Undisputed International title? Padraig O'Dim: Blake, despite the rumors of necromancy that surround me, I'm not a miracle worker. You haven't been there long and the management aren't going to thrust you into the main event right away. You have to prove that you are capable. Your match with Dragon was hardly an amazing display of your skill. Just a beat down. Squash match I think they call it. It hasn't impressed as many people as you believe. But because you have me on your side, I have found for you a way to showcase your talents to the fullest. It's a gauntlet match. The number one contendership for the Fighting Spirit and Undisputed International title. [Blake leans in, his eyes glowing with interest at the mere mention of gold in his future.] Blake Orange: Then whom am I against? Padraig O'Dim: Well it seems they've thrown together an interesting band for you to face Blake. First there's Ash Koopa and Colbert Tottington, from The Rejects. Blake Orange: The two Englishmen? Padraig O'Dim: Well actually I don't think Colber- Blake Orange: Enough. I'll kick their limey asses, just like Orange Industries did to Berkshire Hathaway all those years ago. Who else am I facing? Padraig O'Dim: Blake you will be able to show the world that you can not only hang in there with, but also gain a victory over two former Flycore Champions - Extreme Ninja #2 and Shaun Wilson. Blake Orange: Ninja - like Shinobi? [Padraig rolls his eyes.] Padraig O'Dim: Here I have some files for you on each of them. Their histories, strengths, weaknesses, friends, enemies, the lot. Now Blake, if you'll excuse me I have somewhere I need to be. [Blake and Padraig shake hands as he leaves. The atmosphere in the room lightens and the cameraman breathes a sigh of relief.] Blake Orange: Excellent. Come mister camera man, we have revision to do. Cameraman: That guy is like... from the X-Files or something? Blake Orange: He's not a pornstar my friend. [Starwipe out.] --- (OOC note: Unlike Blake, I am not unhappy with my debut or anything that's happened so far. Just don't want to start blurring kayfabe and reality.) |
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2:36 PM Jul 11