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| Harrison meet Jeff Noon!; What has Harrison done to deserve this? | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Apr 15 2008, 01:16 PM (43 Views) | |
| kwskone | Apr 15 2008, 01:16 PM Post #1 |
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This coming Sunday Harrison O'Reily will be facing his toughest challange yet. He won't be gracing the ring with a jobbing 7ft freak or a man who claims to be 100% but only seems to bring 5% to the ring. We find ourselves backstage after Harrison O'Reily has just defeated his previous opponent with some ease. He's standing under a shower head with water pounding down onto his back and neck. He looks up, collects some water in his mouth and spits it back out. He turns the power supply off and wraps a towel around his waist and heads into what can be described as the "front room" of his locker room. ???: Ummmmm, hello Harrison. Harrison O'Reily: Sweet Jesus! Who the hell are you? ???: I'm Jeff Noon, here reporting live for FIW. I was just wondering if i could get a few words from you after you crushed 100% Jay Bain this week? Harrison O'Reily: Have you ever heard of knocking? Jeff Noon: Errrrrrr, i thought it would be alright if i just waited. Harrison O'Reily:Well, i dont wanna be sounding like the bad guy but next time knock and wait, O.K! Jeff Noon: Um, Er, ok then, no problem. Looking abit nervous now Jeff Noon starts to fumble about with a microphone and some pre-prepared notes he's made. Jeff Noon: Uhhhhh, are you ready now? Harrison O'Reily: Just give me 2 minutes... Harrison disappears behind a door, a few minutes pass before he comes back out fully clothed. An open shirt with a black tanktop and a pair of "worn and torn" affect jeans. He sits on a chair opposite Noon and folds his arms. Jeff Noon: Ummmmm, well, after watching your match before with Jay Bain people have started to call you unbeatable. Harrison O'Reily: BAH! Don't be daft, have you seen the caliabre of opponent i've had? It's like a list of who's who in the world of pathetic wrestling. The two times i've been in the ring, sure i've dominated and deystroyed my opponents, but they've both been nothing speci... Jeff Noon: Can i interupt you there for a minute Harrison? Harrison O'Reily: *sigh* well, seem as though you already have, you might aswell finish now.... Jeff Noon: Errrrrm, it's just, I could do with your advice on something. Harrison signals for Noon to continue. Jeff Noon: It's just, errrrr, when we were in England for Anarchy a few weeks back i thought i'd try and win my girlfriend back. You know she dumped me right? Harrison O'Reily: No, but go on.... Jeff Noon: Well i thought i'd suprise her with some flowers but it seems too of made things worse! Harrison O'Reily: Right, doesn't she like flowers then? Jeff Noon: Well, no, she's allergic to them. Harrison O'Reily: So she's allergic to flowers, yet you took her some? Is that right? Jeff Noon: Ummmmm, well, yea, I mean, everyone loves flowers don't they! Harrison looks puzzled and speechless at the moronic tendencies of this man, Jeff Noon. How did he get a job with the company, who knows? Harrison pulls himself together and braces himself for the rest of the interview. Harrison O'Reily: Right, I think thats enough about you, is there anything more you'd like to ask me? Jeff Noon: Errrrrrm, there is actually yes, I was just wondering if you could tell us abit about your new DvD.....Echoes of a Madman? Harrison is clearly enraged by this point and the grinding noise from his teeth can be clearly heard. He clenches his fists, trying to restrain himself. Harrison O'Reily: I think you've gotten me mixed up with Drake Love. I also think it's best we end this interview before something happens to you.....something bad Jeff Noon stands up and reaches in for the handshake with Harrison. The smell of "citrass" overwhelms Harrison who takes a hasty step back. Harrison O'Reily: Just get the hell out! Jeff Noon: Best of luck on Sunday Mr. Orange. The final straw has been taken and Harrison delivers a strong European uppercut to Noon, who lies on the floor holding his jaw. Harrison steps over his squirming body as he leaves the locker room and the scene starts to fade. |
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2:33 PM Jul 11
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2:33 PM Jul 11