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Give a hoot...
Topic Started: Apr 20 2007, 10:44 PM (92 Views)
Wigumoto
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NPC
[ *  *  *  * ]
The flipping of paper sheets can be heard as we fade into our scene. Once again we find ourselves in the women’s locker room, once again in the company of the world’s most notable Austro-Mexican luchadora, though this time she has her head buried in the pages of a comic. She sits cross-legged on one of the benches, her back against the off white walls as she flips through the colorful pages, quite content to read her way through the stack of comics sat beside her while we watch. But that would make for terrible television, so luckily she finds her relaxing hobby interrupted by the clearing of someone’s throat.

“Ahem. Erm, Lesbiana?”

A familiar voice draws a reluctant sigh from the wrestler’s lips as she lowers her comic into her lap and turns to her right. The voice is a recognizable one to followers of FIW, as that of one Toby Bostock. But what the heck would he be doing in merry ol’ England with the SLA?

Lesbiana: “What now?”

As the camera pulls back it reveals a television set, no doubt the same one that provided Lesbiana’s somewhat inaccurate research last week. All seems to be forgiven though as she’s once again wheeled it into the locker room, this time to apparently beam Toby Bostock’s confuzzled features into her life.

Toby: “Well, erm…is this all we’re going to do?”

Lesbiana: “Whaddya mean ‘all’? We’re expanding our minds through the medium of the written word. We’re setting an example for the younger generations out there, that they might switch off the Tv and pick up a book sometime.

Toby glances at his reading material with puzzlement.

Toby: “Mine’s a comic.”

Lesbiana: “Same diff. In fact, it’s better then a book. It teaches morals and ethics and all that other heroey stuff. Tell us oh Toby, what noble deeds hath your protagonist partaken in.

Toby: “…buh?”

Lesbiana: “What’s the hero of your comic been doing, numnuts.”

Toby: “Oh! Well, in this issue, Ant-Man snuck into Ms. Marvel’s bathroom and watched her shower.”

A moment of thought as this noble tale is absorbed.

Lesbiana: “See!? That’s fucking genius! That is so what I would do if I could shrink down to the size of a mozzie! See? We’ve taught the kid-a-roos out there the practicality of super powers.”

She turns to face the camera, her voice adopting a gentle “after-school special” kinda tone.

Lesbiana: “So kids, the next time you’re on a field trip and you’re introduced to some sort of gamma irradiated insect, why not stick yer hand in it’s cage and poke it around a bit ‘til it nips ya.”

Toby: “I don’t think that’s a very good lesson.”

Lesbiana: “’Course it is! Now, back to reading.”

She straightens her comic out and brings it back to eye level to continue reading the moralistic adventures of someone called ‘Danger Girl’ and her provocatively tight fitting clothing.

Toby: “Yeah, erm, about that. I don’t think ‘The Boss’, or Krähe for that matter, would appreciate us using the satellite uplink to basically sit around reading comics. This thing’s expensive.”

Another frustrated sigh from beneath the mask as Lesbiana has to once again shove her comic to one side.

Lesbiana: “This stuff is educational! X-Men taught us that we shouldn’t exclude people just because they’re different, The Justice League taught us that by working together we can achieve anything, and The Avengers have taught us that ultimately, Iron-Man is a prick.”

Toby: “……..Don’t you have a match or something to prepare for?”

Shooting the Tobester a sharp glare, Lesbiana scoops up her reading material and leaps to her feet.

Lesbiana: “Toby, you’re unimpressed, dry tone and you’re incessant whining for this conversation to make some sort of logical sense or be relevant to anything ever is starting to get on my tits. I’m taking Danger Girl to the loo, I’ll be gone for at least fifteen minutes.”

And with that she marches off in the general direction of the lavatories, leaving Toby trapped within his wood paneled box, musing on the events that have transpired here this evening.

Toby: “Pfft, I’d be done in five.”

Super.
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