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Parking Lot Fry-Up!; Everyone's invited!
Topic Started: May 15 2017, 05:11 PM (411 Views)
Minister Wighty
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Zombie Black has the makings of a small kitchen set up in the parking lot of the Manchester Arena. The door to the Winnebago is open and a huge mixture of music is playing through some kind of groovy Pandora app. Black himself has a black apron over his usual accoutrements that reads "KISS ME I'M DEAD" in giant white letters with a stylized skull above it. Most importantly; hot oil and the smell of fried food in the air as he is manning the cook station for the makings of a truly epic Full Intensity Wrestling fry-up! Everyone is invited, there's plenty of steel chairs and big tables set up for sitting, and Black knows what he's doing so you know the food is good!
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Mjölnir
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Considering he helped Zombie get the items and set up, it's not really surprising that Joe Stanton's present at the fry-up. It really shouldn't be too surprising he's got a plate full of food already either, doing his best to stuff his face full of potato off of it presently.

"Oh oh."

Joe says with a mouthful of food, swaying his hips like he's Axel Rose in the 80's.

"Oh, oh, dancing with myself."

Trying his best to sing along with the song playing, Joe isn't Frank Sinatra. Or, even Billy Idol for that matter. But it's not nails of a chalkboard bad, even with half chewed potato trying to muffle it.
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MrOtaku2399
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[ *  *  * ]
Free food is all Jordan and Rukia need to know about to show up at anything really, even a funeral or wedding! Why? some may ask,well because free food is the best food and the best food today is at this event. Jordan and Rukia walk over to the grill station to ask a few questions before they dig in.

"Hey yer Zombie Black,Right? The really weird, yet really cool guy? So... What is all of this here? I mean what the hell is that mushroom lookin stuff?"
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Minister Wighty
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"Mushrooms."

It's gonna be a good day, Tater.

"Fried mushrooms! Fried sausage! Bacon! Baked beans! Potato cakes! Hash browns!* French fries! Fried toast! Eggs made to order, black pudding and white pudding-- which is like mealy sausage. Black ones with blood, white ones are more fatty-- tomatoes, kippers, an' we got some soysage, fakon, and black bean patties for any vegans out there cooking on the side griddle."

Black has foregone the thicker greasepaint he usually wears for just huge blue-blocker shades because standing in front of this much heat and grease would see most of that paint in your food, and nobody wants that.

"Got a whole mess of condiments over there--"

He points with a spatula to a table laden with plasticware, ketchup, mustard, hot sauce, BBQ, sriracha, and all manner of other items you could think of being handy for this sort of affair.

"An' beer, water, Gatorade an' soda in the coolers over there."

Another point at four clearly-labeled and color-coded coolers; yellow for beer, green for Gatorade, red for soda and blue for water.

"What looks good? I'll scoop you up a plate."

* [size0]He means these for the record, since what a "hash brown" is differs on where you're from.
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MrOtaku2399
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[ *  *  * ]
"Well i'd reckon some of that sausage over there, and some of that bacon and 'tator cakes too. How 'bout some Hash browns for me too!" Jordan says as his mouth water over all the food. He looks over towards Rukia before he asks her a question.

"[What do you want Rukia?]"

"[Eh... Some beans,sausage, eggs, and some fries.]"

"[Ok.] Oh, Rukia here would like some beans,sausage, eggs, and some fries. Please and thank ya sir! Oh yeah we got our drinks handled we have a stash of the good stuff* with us in a cooler in our car. Thanks though!"
He says as he awaits the plates of food.

*By good stuff Jordan means Ale-8-One a nice pop that's good when cold ,but tastes like swamp water when hot and native to his home state of Kentucky.
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Leucippides
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[ *  * ]
::Crystal comes back to one of the tails humming "Peter Cottontail", for whatever reason, as Courtney shakes her head looking at said plate.::

Courtney: "No."

Crystal: "This is for us."

::She sits down placing the plate down with a couple of plastic forks for herself and Courtney.::

Courtney: "You ever hear Queen's "Fat Bottom Girls"?"

Crystal: "I prefer "Seven Seas of Rye". Way ahead of its time, if you ask me. Also, it's a song my trainer isn't using to call me fat."

::There's a little venom there as Crystal stabs her fork into some sausage. Not enough to taint anything, but certainly something of a warning.::

Courtney: "I'm not calling you fat, I'm just saying this match you have is going to be difficult given you have to carry yourself up rather than dropping down and...this is still a roundabout way in calling you fat, I'm sorry."

::While Courtney facepalms over her own sloppy choice of words, Crystal just smiles as she takes a bite of her meat. It was definitely tasty.::

Crystal: "Relax. I've had far worse when on the screen. I mean, when your body is what people are after and they have so many to compare yours too...mix in the anonymity factor of online messaging, let's just say it's not the most beautiful scene. But here, nobody cares and it's one reason that I like it. But for realsies, we're out here because you still seem kinda gloomy."

Courtney: "I do?"

Crystal: "Since you came back from that hardware store."

::Courtney never fully filled in the events of that day for Crystal.::

Crystal: "You remember how you took me to that club the other week?"

::Courtney strains to think. She remembers going to one.::

Courtney: "Sort...of."

Crystal: "You did it to cheer me up. So when I saw the flyer for this, I brought you here to cheer you up."

Courtney: "Breakfast in a parking lot by a zombie man with blood as an ingredient..."

Crystal: "It's different, right?"

::Crystal finishes as she starts on a piece of black pudding herself. She doesn't seem turned off on it and perhaps it's that that has Courtney shrug as she reaches for a piece of fried bread.::

Courtney: "That's true."

::She agrees before biting into it.::
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Minister Wighty
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Black serves up the plates of goodness and hands them over to Rayburn and his company.

"Eat up and enjoy, my dude. There's plenty more where that came from if you need it."

Zombie then returns to making sure everything is cooked to perfection around him.
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MrOtaku2399
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[ *  *  * ]
"Thanks man!" Jordan says with glee as he takes the plates and goes with Rukia to sit down at a table.

Jordan heads to the trunk of his rental and grabs to cold ones before returning to his seat. For those wandering they are near the corner of the table away from allot of people. Despite what you may thing the sultan of tag teams doesn't like many people or being squished up against large crowds. I mean why else would they live in Hokkaido prefecture?

"Itadakimasu!" Rukia cheers before eating.

"[Rukia-Chan,how's the seiyuu business going? Don't you have a gig up soon?]"

"[yeah, it's going well! I got a commercial to do.]"

"[oh? What kind?]"

"[It's one for an anime or some snack i think. I haven't had time to read over it all the way through.]"

"[Ok, cool! I wish you luck then!]"

"Arigatougozaimasu!"
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Dai
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"What'cha fuckin' vuh..."

Hikou Sekai closes his eyes mid word, as he struggles how to ask for what he wants in a foreign language. Don't ask where he came from, he's a Ninja.

"Vegeta... Rian? Options. Askin' for a friend."

His friend is a Ninja, too. The world's first and probably only Goat Ninja: Lucifer Goatfuck. He has a ninja mask and a new, black goat blanket and if he don't get some scran1 soon, some fucker's getting nutted.2 Hey, I'm only here to translate what he's says.

"Baaahehehehe."

[size0]1 Food.

2 Headbutted.
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MrOtaku2399
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[ *  *  * ]
Jordan and Rukia are continuing to eat and talk amongst them selves when Rukia spots the coolest goat in all of FIW. Her eyes get really big and she begins screaming like a child.

"[Cool! that goat over there is super cool! pretty too!]" She gleams.

"[Huh? What goat?]"

"[That one over there near the ninja guy!]"
She explains as she points towards the direction Lucifer Goatfuck and his master(?) or friend or what ever their relationship is. Jordan turns around to see what she's pointing at and then turns back to talk to her again.

"[Oh, those guys. I don't know if we should talk to them. I mean that guys some biker dude from konoha or something and that goat is... well i mean it looks, it doesn't look nice.]"

"[But...But...]"
She begins to murmur.

"[ok,ok let's go see if you can pet it or what ever than.]" Jordan says reluctantly.

They get up and walk over towards the struggling ninja and his goat friend.

"[Excuse me,um... Ninja man, um... sorry to bother you right now,but my girlfriend here wanted to know if she could pet yer goat or get a picture or something?]"
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Dai
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It's pretty reasonable request, except Hikou is not in a reasonable mood. He rarely is when so much tasty food is at stake. He hits Jordan with a wild-eyed stare, piercings wobbling on his face as he whirls round, and growls.

"[Ask him your] fuckin' [self, ass.]"

"Baaahehehehe."

I'm no expert, but I think that translated to "Yeah, ass."
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MrOtaku2399
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[ *  *  * ]
Jordan takes a step back before looking down at the goat,than back up to Hikou,than the goat again. It makes things a bit awkward. He pulls out his phones and types in google translate before scrolling down to the goat option. He types in his request before clicking that little speaker next to the translation. His phone blares his request out to the GOAT goat.

"beheheahahehehahea?"

He hears some goat noises and doesn't know what the answer was. Because he doesn't speak goat. He just assumes and gives Rukia the go ahead.

She pulls out her phone and takes a picture with the GOAT goat Lucifer Goatfuck and pets him on his head before handing him some apple slices. She might be pushing her luck though and Jordan urges her to get the hell out of there before the scary guy clobbers them.

"[Thank you sir, and thank you too... Goat-san. We'll let you be on yer way now.Excuse us.]" He says as he begins to push Rukia back to their seats.
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Dai
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"Fuckin' [idiots. Act like you seen a goat before, naa?]"

INORITE, thinks the goat but he doesn't sweat the attention. Hikou shrugs.

"[Yeah, no. It's fine. We don't need to tip the stand over as long as we get some fucking food in soon.]"
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Mjölnir
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Billy Idol's come and gone for something a little more contemporary, and so Joe's interest in the music has waned. Glancing around, he scopes out the fry-up, noticing a lot of the staff has shown up and that some of the other people on the roster too. There's a long stare on the gathering around the goat and the animal itself, Joe looking like he's having a lot of thoughts running through his head.

"Huh."

It's all he can really say to that, staring at the goat. Once he's determined someone didn't slip him something, he wanders closer to the man behind the food.

"You know, it's nice."

Joe says to Zombie with a smile, helping himself to some more food. He gestures with a nod to Hikou and the goat, looking their way.

"It's good to see hide and his relationship's still as strong as ever."

Grabbing hold of a sausage, he chomps down on it aggressively.
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Minister Wighty
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After all the kerfluffle, our head chef is capable of answering Hikou's question.

"Fakon, soysage, an' black bean burger patties. Lemme get you a plate."

He's a cool dude, so yes. He serves a plate of vegetarian food to a goat, bowing low.

"For your consideration, sir."

He pops back up, looking expectantly at Hikou and awaiting his order. That's when Joe manages to nab his ear. Zombie puts his mouth behind his hand and talks quietly out the corner.

"I don't think that's hide. I think that's the new one, Rebel."

Zombie is either not very quiet, or Rebel is well good at hearing, as she exits the Winnie with a shout.

"HEY! I ain't no goat."

She stomps down the metal stairs, fixing her studded pleather belt.

"Lucifer a hell of a lot more prettier than me anyhow."

Rebel grabs a plate, holding it out to the chef.

"Pile o' protein, dickweed. Also I clogged your shitter."

Zombie looks beleaguered, but gets to servin' up the meats.
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Dai
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"Baaahehehehe."

No clue whether that means "ta, lerd,3" or "fuck you, Stanton.4" or even just actually laughing at the misadventures of Rebel in the bathroom. Hikou's guess is the second option although it must be said he only managed to pick out one word that Joe actually said.

"..."

Hikou is not amused, and gives Joe the stink-eye. Someone get this man some meat before he starts a fight.

[size0]3 Thanks, friend.

4 I do not appreciate your attempts at humour, Mr. Stanton.
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Minister Wighty
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Hastily, Zombie begins adding meat to a second plate for Hikou.

"Don't mind him. He's all hyped up on sausage and root beer."
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Dai
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Funnily enough, the author has always held that the fake bacon is the tool of the devil but Lucifer Goatfuck isn't interested. He's all over the black bean burgers though. Who can predict the innermost workings of a goat?

"..."

Meanwhile, Hikou has been placated by a hefty plate of Full English, and his black look softens to mild suspicion with each passing rasher of bacon.
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Mjölnir
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"Yeah, just don't know when I've had enough."

Joe adds to Zombie's joke, taking a swig of root beer to further demonstrate. The bottle lingers at his mouth and he eyes the goat again.

"Is he buckled?"

Apparently Stanton hasn't clued in that Hikou's English is dodgy. His expression turns somewhat fearful, glancing around the gathering.

"Don't need Bob Barker hunting us down."

Said as if Bob Barker is more Dracula than concerned senior citizen.
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Minister Wighty
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Rebel's English is a bit better... but not that much better. She gives Lucifer a once-over, trying to divine what the fuck Stanton is talking about, but seeing nothing shrugs.

"Nah, he's fine. Kick the shit outta Bob Barker, whoever the fuck that is."

Despite having plenty of her own sausage, she steals one off Hikou's plate and begins to lead the goat toward a table. Passing her on the way is none other than Vi! Everyone remembers Vi, right?

"Quite the spread you got here, boss."

She picks up a piece of facon and munches on it, giving Zombie the hug he deserves and a kiss on the cheek.

"I do what I can."

There's a lot of people who want a lot of food, so Zombie doesn't have much time to talk. Besides, Vi's more interested to speak with the guy nearby.

"So... Joe Stanton. Long time no effin' see. How ya been?"
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Mjölnir
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" [size0]You fool, no one can kick Bob Barker's ass. No one."

Stanton mutters grimly under his breath, watching Rebel drift away from his presence with Lucifer. A thousand yard stare overtaking him and he wearily takes a bite out of the sausage in his hand. Chewing in a slow style similar to the beast that walked away from him, Joe's snapped out of it by the arrival of Vi!

"Shit, it's been a second."

How long of a second is something Joe has to put some serious thought into. He offers a fist for the lady to pound, giving her the one that only mildly has sausage grease on it. What a gentleman.

"Good...really good, honestly. Got a steady paycheck, got a job I love, got some cool cats to help pass the down time with and got a title belt."

As if to emphasize his last point, he clanks his root beer bottle against the Fighting Spirit Championship.

"Livin' the dream."

The Scarlet Speedster tries to be nonchalant about it, clearly happy but not wanting to boast about it. He glances around, getting a little self-conscious that he might be rubbing someone the wrong way if they overhear. Eventually his eyes settle back on Vi with a smile.

"How about in the House of Vi?"

He gestures to her to spill it, getting a faux regal tone when he asks her.
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Minister Wighty
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She returns that bump.

"Good. Not perfect, but good. Got my lady, got... um... I think I'm still employed here. Ain't been on TV for a while. Ain't been to ringside in longer."

She grabs a sausage and puts it in some fried bread, eating it like a hot dog.

"Not sure about where I am in the world these days, besides being K-chan's number one lady. That's a good start, but y'always want more, y'know?"

She's still pretty jacked. I don't know why she doesn't punch people for a living.
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Mjölnir
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Nodding, Joe mulls over the information.

"Oh yeah, I get it, you're talking to a fellow alley creeper light on his feet. Gotta find that future."

Though initially started as a joke, there's conviction in what he says when he talks about searching for tomorrow. He munches on some more of his food and he thinks some more.

"From where I'm standing, you're a lucky lady, a lot of people can only wish to have what you have, something real like that. But sometimes it's good to take a step back from everything else. Even if you don't think so to begin with. Getting perspective can do a lot to help somebody trying to figure stuff out, you know?"

It sounds like he's speaking from experience there.

"Liked the ears and tail look, by the way. Thought it was a nice upgrade."

Joe says plainly and sets his plate down temporarily. As if she didn't know what he was talking about, he pops his hands on top of his head like an animal ears. Or, like he's about to invoke an old meme.
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Minister Wighty
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I waited to see if anyone else wanted to post, but I guess not.

"Yeah, me too. Good ring look, yanno?"

Well, I know.

"I dunno if I belong in the ring anymore, though. I mean... on one hand it's really all I know, right? I don't really have other skills... or interests that're... constructive. Unless I could be professionally cute."

"Can you make money off Instagram?" is her next thought. Yes, you can, but it's more complicated than it seems.

"You ever feel like that? Like, wonder what you'd do away from the wrestling world? They ask that kinda crap in interviews all the time, but... like, what would you really do?"
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Hayden
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[ *  * ]
Moving quickly and silently, The Dream slinks past the Guy In Shades and the Queen of Biceps. He stops to give Lucifer a once over, debating on whether or not he'd get a hoof to the tits for petting him. Thinking better of it (and avoiding the stares of other patrons), Dream army crawls over to Zombie, slowly rising up with a nonchalant whistle.

"Heeeeeeey buddy. Got any hot dogs wrapped in bacon? Need the protein."
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