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Inwe's Training (Classroom)
Topic Started: Dec 7 2004, 03:13 PM (370 Views)
Sapphira Calren
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Sapphira sat in the small room, waiting for her new mentee, Inwe, to arrive. Lately there had been a lot of new novices arriving, and Sapphira had taken some of the training upon herself. She enjoyed training the girls, it was exciting to see their expressions when they gained the Source. It made her feel more in touch with the Tower, she did not want to be one of those Amyrlins who sat up in her high tower all day and knew everything about the outside world, but nothing about those she governed. Surely getting to know the novices- even this little bit -was the best way to seem approachable to everyone. It sometimes saddened her that she could not simply enjoy training the novices without coming up with all the other ways that might make her look better- or worse -in the eyes of the Aes Sedai and the world, but that was part of being both Amyrlin and Cairhienin. She no longer thought of herself as from Cairhienin, but she still had some of their tendencies now and then. Sapphira lit the lamp sitting on the table in front of her, and, using Air, hung it a few feet above the table. Unless Inwe was a very rare sort of Wilder, she would be able to see only the lamp, and not the Air holding it up, hopefully that would be a fitting introduction to saidar, and show her that it did have its uses. Not that holding a lamp up was something Sapphira ever actually did, it was only an interesting little trick she liked to use when training a new girl, to get a feel for how they reacted to some small sort of surprise.

She leaned back in her chair to wait for the girl she was to train, running through the weaves she would teach the girl mentally. A bit of a warning about the dangers of the Power, embracing, a small weave in each element, then maybe a bit more if she showed promise in any one area or with a weave. Sapphira wondered what areas Inwe would prove to be strong in, perhaps she was one of the women with promise in Earth or Fire. Maybe one of the more traditional who could work well with Air or Water, however she was, Sapphira looked forward to meeting one of the newest initiates in her charge.

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Inwe Cedelyn
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Inwe followed the Accepted infront of her angrily, glaring down at the seven bands of color on her dress. Why must novices wear plain white? It nearly made her want to scream at being put in the small room with a roomie she had not yet met, everything plain, even her clothes. It just isn't fair! she thought furiously. After a few more steps of mumbling and anger, calm overtook her and a sudden wave of happiness hit. She was not out in the streets again.. Well taken care of, dressed, fed, and taught, everything was fine. With that fresh in Inwe's mind, she looked up for the first time since leaving her room, and merely smiled. Attempting to be friendly for one of the first times since arriving, she spoke gently to the Accepted. "I'm called Inwe.. What might your name be?" Recieving only a glance and rolled eyes, she felt offended, hoping the woman did not think ill of her. Perhaps it was all of her mumbling earlier.. Oh well, what's done is done. She only continued to follow in a dull silence.

When the Accepted stopped and gestured to a door before hurrying off, Inwe only stood for a moment, paralized. It had just dawned on her that Cayana Sedai had chosen Mother to be her mentor. Light, the Amyrlin Seat herself! What if I mess up or make a bad impression? I will probably get sent away from the Tower forever! With a frustated sigh, Inwe pushed everything to the back of her mind and wrapped herself in pure calm, though fear still tugged at her. Right now, she was not to let anything catch her by surprize. With a deep breath, the frightened novice stepped into the room, gently closing the door behind her. She stood there for a moment, still facing the way she came in, forcing herself not to flee. In a flurry of motion, she spun around, clasped a hand on her heart and sighed. The candle nearly scared Inwe out of her wits, but she realized that the Amyrlin had most likely grasped saidar. For a moment she wanted it to touch it, but knew she could not without guidance, though feeling it only once in her life made her crave it again. Trying many times in the past and failing only drove the point home that she would require proper training.. But Mother? Light! Taking a step but realizing she had forgotten something important, Inwe stopped, dropping a curtsy. After she straightened up, her grey eyes gazed unsteadily into her mentor's, waiting for permission to sit, trying to hold control of her emotions, stomach fluttering wildly with butterflies..
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Sapphira Calren
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Sapphira pushed all thoughts out of her mind as she felt two women with the ability to channel beyond the door, she watched as a white-clad young woman opened the door, and then allowed a smile at the surprised look when she saw the shock on her face at seeing the lamp. Inwe said nothing, but took a step, then stopped suddenly and curtsied deeply. Inwe stood and looked Sapphira in her eyes, and still said nothing. Respectful already, and brave, to meet the eyes of an Aes Sedai, Sapphira thought, noting both, recording them away for future recall. "Hello Inwe, please, sit," she said, gesturing to the chair across from her. "I am your mentor, Sapphira, I will be training you in saidar." Sapphira waited while Inwe sat down, looking the young woman over, wondering whether this was a member of the next generation of Aes Sedai. If she showed enough initiative, and worked hard enough, she certainly could be. Sapphira waited while Inwe made herself comfortable before speaking again, when she did her voice lost none of its warmth, but it also held an edge that said what she was saying was of utmost importance, and must not be ignored.

"Before we begin your training, there are some things you must know about the Power. It is a wonderful thing, very useful, and quite amazing, but it is also very dangerous. If you try to hold too much you could burn yourself out, or kill yourself- quite painfully. If you misuse or make a mistake with saidar the conciquences will be terrible. No novices are permitted to channel without one of the Accepted or Aes Sedai present, breaking this rule will result in punishment." She waited for a few moments to see what Inwe thought of that, before continuing on. "However, when the rules are followed, and when it is used correctly, holding saidar is a most wonderful experience, one I completely intend for you to know well before you finish with these lessons." She waited again, this time hoping that Inwe would reply, the girl would have to start speaking eventually, and now was as good a time as any. Sapphira glanced up at the lamp, and thought about the look on Inwe's face when she saw it, it was something Sapphira thought she would remember for a long time, it was just the sort of reaction she hoped for, but one she rarely got.

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Inwe Cedelyn
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Inwe's nervousness disapeared in only a few moments of being in the presence of her Mentor. She somehow felt soothed and relaxed, a positive aura (Not like Min's ability, but more like a feeling) being emitted from her. When the Aes Sedai smiled at the shock, she merely frowned in returned, but cleared her expression quickly hoping to not look disrespectful. She sat at the command, or suggestion, either would do, and once again her gray eyes met the other's gray eyes. With all the thoughts racing in her own mind she never once considered Sapphira would be doing her own share of pondering and questioning herself. As she squirmed and made herself comfy, her eyes were drawn away and down cast, wondering if all those old stories about Aes Sedai were true.. Well, apparently not. She was alive now, wasn't she?

Suddenly the Aes Sedai spoke, and Inwe met her gaze again, locking it into place with a bravery new to her. She listened carefully to the words her Mentor said..
"Before we begin your training, there are some things you must know about the Power. It is a wonderful thing, very useful, and quite amazing, but it is also very dangerous. If you try to hold too much you could burn yourself out, or kill yourself- quite painfully. If you misuse or make a mistake with saidar the conciquences will be terrible. No novices are permitted to channel without one of the Accepted or Aes Sedai present, breaking this rule will result in punishment. However, when the rules are followed, and when it is used correctly, holding saidar is a most wonderful experience, one I completely intend for you to know well before you finish with these lessons."
..To Inwe, it was quite a long speech, and it took a few moments before it sunk in. Fiddling with her hands folded in her lap, she spoke for the first time since arriving.
"I understand, Mother.. But if I might ask a question? Is it possible to have some barrier that blocks you from touching saidar?"
She blinked and remembered hearing something of it in Wilders that had to be broken but most of the time took awhile. Ofcoarse. She probably didn't have one, but it was possible.. Waiting for Mother to go on or advance to the training session, she waited, almost impatiently.
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Sapphira Calren
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Sapphira waited while Inwe let her little speech sink in, she was surprised at the question the girl asked. Why would she wonder about blocks, unless she had reason to believe she had one herself, Sapphira did not let herself wonder though, and took only a moment before answering. "Yes, it is possible to block yourself from the source, though for the most part women with blocks have been channeling for years before coming to the Tower, unknowingly. They do not channel conciously, and do not block themselves purposely. Every block is different, some women must be angry to channel, some have to have their eyes shut, some must have an attractive man around, the list goes on. Every block is broken differently, some can be broken quickly with only a few different attempts, some can take weeks, some years, a girl can be raised to Accepted with a block, but she cannot become Aes Sedai until her block is broken." Sapphira stopped to let her mentee process the information, and wondered why she had asked the question. She was not sure how old the child was, was she old enough to have a block? Or perhaps she was just curious, Sapphira hoped that would be it, breaking a block was never easy, and always meant more frustration for both the mentor and the mentee.

Sapphira waited to see whether Inwe had any more questions, some girls asked no questions, others had no end of questions, either way Sapphira was willing to work. Girls with more questions were refreshing, they were rarer, and it often meant that they did not hate being in the Tower as much as others. The only time Sapphira had concidered starting the lesson before the novice was finished with her questions was soon after she was raised to the shawl. The novice had been very inquisitive, and Sapphira nervous about her first mentee, she had made it through though, and managed to sit through most of the girl's questions before postponing them. Inwe did not seem so inquisitive, but if she was, Sapphira had been Aes Sedai long enough that she was sure she could answer whatever questions she came up with. Sapphira had long since gotten over nervousness, after being a Red, and becoming Amrylin, Sapphira could think of very few circumstances that would be foreign to her, and foreign circumstances being the cause of nerves, she had not experienced that badly for a very long time. She sat patiently, she would wait a few more moments, and if Inwe had no other questions, she would begin the lesson.

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Inwe Cedelyn
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Inwe waited for her mentor to answer the question, somewhat impatiently, but still incheck with her emotions as not to let them suddenly go haywire. When yet another small speech began, she listened intently. "Yes, it is possible to block yourself from the source, though for the most part women with blocks have been channeling for years before coming to the Tower, unknowingly. They do not channel conciously, and do not block themselves purposely. Every block is different, some women must be angry to channel, some have to have their eyes shut, some must have an attractive man around, the list goes on. Every block is broken differently, some can be broken quickly with only a few different attempts, some can take weeks, some years, a girl can be raised to Accepted with a block, but she cannot become Aes Sedai until her block is broken." Keeping calm, Inwe assured herself that no such thing happened to her, she probably had not been channeling nearly as long as it would have taken for one to form.. Light, please don't make this any worse.. she thought pleadingly to herself.

After a moment Inwe nodded and spoke once more, though it was only very short and straightforward. "Understood, Mother, and I have no further questions at the moment.. We can begin whenever you wish it." Sighing slightly, Inwe wondered what could have happened if that drunken man had not tried to.. She shivered while scolding herself angrily, Do not let that slip into your mind, you wool-head! You need to focus on your task at hand, not that wretched man! Once again emptying on the thoughts in her mind, Inwe whiped the troubled expression off her face and focused on Sapphira. She would get this right the first time and failure on her part would not be tolerated.. Inwe assured herself of it as she waited for Mother to continue.
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Sapphira Calren
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Sapphira waited while Inwe absorbed the information, and then gave Sapphira permission to begin the lesson. Sapphira did not comment on it, but began the lesson anyway. "Alright, I wish it now," she said, her voice conveying some of her thoughts. "In order to channel, you must be calm, the most common method for achieving calm is this: Picture a flower bud- any kind will do, picture it perfectly, every vein, every petal, the exact color. Push everything else from your mind, nothing but the flower, complete calm. When you have it, let it open slowly, like an entire blossoming in a few moments." Her voice droned, an even, calm tone, almost meditative. Sapphira waited, if all went well, Inwe would open her eyes, frustrated, and say that she saw the light, but it slipped through her fingers. Worst case would be she would open her eyes and say there was no light- or that she could not picture the flower, or get the flower with no inturruptions from other thoughts. Sapphira droned on, softly, feeling herself calm as well. The novice excercises could be used for calm by any Aes Sedai, droning on was not a novice exercise, but something Sapphira remembered the sister doing during her own training, it still lent her some extent of calm. She allowed her mind to drift a bit, but did not allow it to stop anywhere, and kept most of her attention on Inwe, even in embracing the Source, novices might make a mistake somehow.

Sapphira watched the girl across from her closely, she was clearly concentrating, not willing to give up yet. With this kind of will, Sapphira would not be surprised if it did not take long for her mentee to get a feel of the Power, that was always a most amazing time. Seeing a girl's face when she first touched saidar was exhilirating, the reactions were always different, but always had a few things in common. They could not help but show some joy- if not really happiness, it did mean being truly stuck in the Tower, after all. They always wanted more, and were usually suddenly much more willing to follow directions. Sapphira stopped her line of thought, she did not want to get ahead of herself, it was much more likely that Inwe would take a few tries to get any grasp on the Source. Getting to far ahead of herself, Sapphira did not doubt that she would look forward to the true channeling too much, and almost lose her concentration on Inwe. She had been around long enough to know her own weaknesses and downfalls, and was not stupid enough to ignore them.

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Inwe Cedelyn
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Inwe twirled her white-blonde hair absently with an idle finger, drifting off abit. Though at the first words, she dropped a hand and folded it neatly into her lap, ears open. "Alright, I wish it now," her mentor said. "In order to channel, you must be calm, the most common method for achieving calm is this: Picture a flower bud- any kind will do, picture it perfectly, every vein, every petal, the exact color. Push everything else from your mind, nothing but the flower, complete calm. When you have it, let it open slowly, like an entire blossoming in a few moments." Blinking at the speech delivered in such a calm and clear voice that made Inwe jittery, She squirmed a bit, but stopped instantly when she realized the Aes Sedai teaching her was waiting. The novice did not go imedietly, but instead gazed at the table for a few moments, sorting her thoughts one by one then forcing them out of her mind.

Only a moment later had Inwe closed her eyes and began to think of the flower. Light, a flower? she thought grimly to herself. Suddenly a clear image popped into her mind. It was a large bud with a green underside and a tall stem with many leaves. Inwe then invisioned a beautiful ray of sunlight striking the single flower.. It slowly began to bloom, revealing five large pink petals. It almost had finished when-What on earth is supposed to happen?. Just like that the flower disapeared and everything flooded back into the empty space that was ussualy occupied. Determination of her face disapeared replaced by pure out-rage then frustation as she pictured everything once again. This time everything was locked away and would not float across her mind in the middle of everything. Calm replaced her features as the flower neared completion in blooming, then it was open and a bright light engulfed it. Question then bliss were on her face, but when she neared the light something blocked her way. She struck it head on but did not give up yet. Inwe invisioned the flower one last time, though more quickly, and hit the barrier even harder.

Expression going blank for a few moments, Inwe thought stubornly I bet that Aes Sedai is doing something with the Power.. She's blocking me, testing me.. If that is possible. Realizing she had thought that, sadness then rage built up on her face as she opened her gray eyes. Staring blanky at her mentor for a moment, rage built up again and she growled under her breath, though loudly enough for others to hear, "I tried several times, yet it didn't work. I hit something hard two times and it would not give way." Nearly glaring at the Amyrlin Seat, she continued to think furiosly, but upon realizing what she was doing stopped dead in her line of thinking and whiped her expression clean of everything except for a frown. Not one to resent or blame things on people for to long, she scolded herself and felt on the verge of tears. What would her mentor think?
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Sapphira Calren
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Sapphira waited while Inwe closed her eyes, only slightly noticing the amount of time it took the girl to begin, her voice droned on, until Inwe opened her eyes again. She looked a bit agitated, but closed her eyes again quickly and tried again. Sapphira noticed the blissful look on her face, but no glow sprang up around her mentee, so Inwe was only seeing the Source, feeling it, but not holding it. She sat like that for a few moments, before opening her eyes and saying rather angrily that she had tried several times, but had hit a barrier and been unable to touch saidar. Sapphira's first thought was that the girl had a block, she was older than most new novices, and Sapphira could feel that she had already channeled, so it was quite possible that she had developed a block. "It is possible that you may have a block, Inwe but there is also a chance that it is just jitters and nerves. I would like you to try one more time," she said calmly, there was no reason to make her nervous and making it all the harder for her. She watched Inwe closely, not letting her mind wander this time, and she decided not to speak this time, perhaps Inwe could concentrate better without someone droning on behind her attempts. She sincerely hoped that she would not have to deal with a block, she could do it, yes, but she did not want to take the extra time or effort involved in block breaking.

She waited for Inwe to try again, and hoped that the girl would find the Source. Were she a White, she might have seen it sooner, with the girl's age, combined with her having channeled before, and then especially after the girl hit a "barrier." But, she was not a White, and never had been, and she was willing to take the chance rather than try to figure out what her block was before being completely certain that there was a block.

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Inwe Cedelyn
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"It is possible that you may have a block, Inwe but there is also a chance that it is just jitters and nerves. I would like you to try one more time," Inwe's mentor said as if it was no big deal. Oh, how that voice of complete calm got on her last nerve! Though tears still dared to break through her new found determinedness, she held them back for the time being and shut her eyes tight. Imagining the flower again was difficult and she had to try several times before she could actually picture it cleary. As the flower opened it was once again consumed by a bright light and a feeling that was so wonderful words were beyond Inwe, but trying to go further produced the same result. An invisible barrier.

Opening her grey eyes, Inwe turned them downcast, affraid that if she looked at the Aes Sedai the tears would spring up and would be uncontrolable. You flaming woolhead! a voice said within her mind Bloody bundle of uncontrolable emotions! Insults continued to poor into Inwe's head in a voice she did not recognize, and her spirits only dropped. Struggling with herself visibly, she tried to push the voice away but the result was only more harsh and offending insults. Light.. Just shut up and leave me alone.. her own voice in her head sounded weak and hopeless, tumbled over by words that pierced her heart.. She felt to be going mad like the legends of men many years before. Sniffling a bit, Inwe finnaly struggled no more and began to allow the tears to flow freely down her cheeks, sobs shaking her slender bodice. I'm horrible! her voice pounded through I'm bloody horrible..SHUT UP! The unknown voice silenced but the emptiness was replaced by her own thoughts and memories of hers long past that she had tried to forget...That mans foul breath, rumaging through the garbage, her adopted mother so crushed after that terrible day, an unknown woman and man being slaughtered by bandits.. Everything horrible that had ever happened in Inwe's life, even the things she did not remember, filled her and made the sobbing worse.. What a failure.. what a wimp.. what will Mother say? was her last thought. What would her Mentor say to this foolish behavior?
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Sapphira Calren
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(OOC: I assume that while Inwe cries, she channels, if not, I'll edit this, sorry it's short, but there wasn't a whole lot I could do.)

Sapphira waited, and watched Inwe, the girl was clearly upset, but she closed her eyes and tried again anyway. Nothing happened, and it was very clear that she was struggling to keep herself under control. She did not appear to be succeeding though, and before long, she turned away and Sapphira saw tears streaming down her cheeks. Sapphira was curious, many novices were discouraged when they could not channel, but most did not break down into tears. In a few moments, the answer was revealed to Sapphira when she felt the Power flow into the girl, and the glow sprang up around her. Apparently there was a block, there was no way a girl could channel through such heavy emotion if not. Well, at least that is the end of worrying about what it is, now, how to break it? She waited a few moments, hoping that Inwe would calm herself on her own. When Inwe showed no signs of stopping, Sapphira stood and walked around the table to her side, where she knelt and gently put a hand on the novice's arm. "Inwe?" she said gently, allowing her voice to show some concern. She was afraid that the Power flowing through Inwe would become too much, and she would burn herself out, but she did not want to shield the girl, that would no calm her any, suddenly being cut off from the source. Even though Inwe already had the Source, her hold on it was tenuous, as blocks and new novices always were, and she was not holding much- but too much for a novice -and Sapphira knew if she had to, then she could shield the girl. And if she pulls any more saidar, then I will shield her. "Inwe, stop crying, and release the Source, now," she said, her voice harder this time, she could not allow a child to channel without permission.

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(( OOC: You mentioned her being shielded, so I posted at the end as if she had been.. if you didn't want it that way, tell me and I will change it! :) Oh, and sorry the post is a bit short.. I'm being rushed :angry: ))

Inwe was still struggling to control her sobs when she realized her mentor was kneeling next to her and had rested a hand on her arm. Her own thoughts still insulted her and memories crashed through the wall she had tried to put around them mentaly, so her tears did not stop. "Inwe, stop crying, and release the Source, now," the Amyrlin Seat said harshly, and just then did the girl realize she held onto saidar. Her sences seemed enhanced and the feeling was just.. too wonderful to describe, it was beyond words.. Drawing more, though without realizing it, made Inwe feel even more wonderful, though that seemed impossible. In only seconds she held so much that the sweetness burned, then suddenly it was gone.. The voice taunted her again, It was that Aes Sedai, she only set you up.. You should kill her! Kill them all! She seemed at loss while whiping away the tears that stained her cheeks, but reluctantly turned to her Mentor. Setting her gray eyes downcast, Inwe opened her mouth but no sound came out. Trying again produced a small, stammering voice that sounded weak yet truely sorry. "M-mother, I'm s-so sor-ry.. I didn't m-mean t-o.. I t-tried to..", was all she could say without trailing off.. Now she was probably in for a punishment..
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(OOC: That's fine, makes for interesting RP :))

Sapphira was relieved when Inwe's sobs began to subside, she would not have to shield the girl after all, but her face changed, to one of wonder, and more of the Power flowed into the girl. Sapphira went from agitation to anger, though her face did not reveal it, she wove Spirit for a Shield, and slammed it between the girl and the Source. Inwe's face changed suddnely, to reflect loss and perhaps a bit of pain, and finally she squeaked an apology. Sapphira stood and went back over to her chair, not releasing the sheild on Inwe. "Inwe, you must understand the seriousness of what you have done," she said, her voice hard. "By channeling, you could have burnt yourself out, I have no doubt by the amount of the Power that was in you, and you drawing more, that you would have gotten to that point very quickly. Girls who burn themselves out are put out of the Tower, and those we know of do not live very long- if they survive the burning out at all. Very often girls die- painfully -from what you have just done. Not only that, but you put myself and all the others- the women especially -in this building in danger of death, injury or stilling. Apparently your block involves severe sadness or crying, either you learn to control that, or your chances of surviving to Accepted look slim." Sapphira's voice was anything but soft, her kind covering was gone, revealing the hard person that was the true Amyrlin. "I will not send you for punishment, as I did tell you to channel, and this is the risk you run when training a girl, especially as I suspected you have a block. However," her voice got even harder, "in no way does that make what you did acceptable, and if it happens again, you will receive a pennance." She waited for all of this to sink in, everything she had said was completely true.

"Now," she said, her voice less hard, but still not soft, "the one good thing that comes of this, we now know that your block has something to do with crying- or whatever emotion you were experiencing when you cried. This makes things little easier, as we still have to break it, but knowing what it is will help you recognize problem situations in the future. Stay away from things that make you cry, or feel what you just did. This does, however, make things harder for both of us, we have to figure out how to break your block before we can really begin the training, though we might be able to do some small things before, it is not very likely, given the type of block you have." She waited again to see what Inwe made of all this, and said nothing more, Sapphira had to make sure Inwe understood all of what she had said before they continued with the training.

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Sapphira Calren
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*bump*

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Inwe Cedelyn
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((OOC: So sorry! Real life is taking away my online time! Gotta make this short again.. ))

Inwe listened to all the Amyrlin Seat's words, grey eyes downcast, hands folded neatly in her lap to keep them from flutering elsewhere. The woman paused often to let the her soak everything up, but it only made her mood worse. The novice often kept her emotions on a short reign, but right now they were struggling to break lose, wanting to slap the woman before her so hard she saw stars for a month! No.. Inwe thought angrily I do NOT want to do that.. She would bound and gag me with the One Power and throw me out of the tower before I could blink.. I wouldn't want to do it, anyways. Despite herself, she frowned before focusing back in the Sapphira's words, then gave a start. The woman had stopped talking.. how long ago? Inwe made an attempt to have a calm voice, and was surprized how calm it actualy sounded. "Forgive me, Mother," Inwe said, wondering if she should stand and cursty, "I understand.." She had her hands clasped so tightly, her knuckles were white and it was a wonder her hands didn't fall off, before she finnaly stood. Hesitating a moment, she swept a curtsy so deep her head was even with her knees and the girl looked about to fall over. When Inwe stood again, her expresion was a mix of emotions that she made an attempt to hide, though her voice once again was calmness, "Forgive me if I have offended, Mother, and thank you for your mercy.. Permission to sit, Mother?" Inwe blushed, realizing she had stood just to curtsy, and her gaze once again rested on the floor under her feet. Light, was that the right thing to do? The right way to adress her? she thought sourly Probably not, but what's done is done.. She dared a glance at the Amyrlin's face, then turned her gaze to the floor again, waiting for the woman's reply.
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