Bio :: Arad Elwin

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Bio :: Arad Elwin; Soldier
Topic Started: Aug 1 2006, 12:16 AM (197 Views)
Arad Elwin	Aug 1 2006, 12:16 AM Post #1
Unregistered	Name: Arad Elwin Age: 16 Nationality: Tear. Height: 1.65 cm. Weight: 60kg. Hair color/length: red long hair. Eye color: black. Personality: Arad is very naughty boy, he behaves like a child as well, he allways play instead of learning and makes tricks on people. he is sometimes rude, but sometimes polite if he wants to. strength: 35 air: 5 spirit: 8 water: 5 earth: 7 fire: 10 i want a talent but i don't know where to ask to approve it so i'll ask you here if i can have it: talent: Aura reading. History: Arad was born in Tear to a royal family, he is like the "black sheep" in his family. he is the youngest in his family, all his brothers are trained soldiers in Tear's army. Arad doesn't like to study, he allways play and do tricks. one day, while he plays in the yard of his family's mansion, he suddenly channel the one power, Saidin. he makes a ball of fire floats in the air, Arad was so surprised he stops and ran away, makes his ball disappears. Arad tell his parents what happened, his parents was scared but also feels proud that their youngest son will become an Asha'man. they told him he will be sent to the gray tower to learn how to control the one power. at first, Arad didn't like it, he decides to run away from home. he ran away, and found work in camelin in a inn as a servent, he wasn't costume to a work like that, cause he had servents in his home, but he manages and work hard. then soldiers of his family found him, after his parents order them to search for him. and from camelin he reaches the grey tower... (if you approve my request for talent, i will add some more to my history that mantions to my talent)
Unregistered


Radgar	Aug 1 2006, 02:17 AM Post #2
Dedicated / Senior Member, Lost during the War Posts: 236 Group: Retired Members Member #27 Joined: September 17, 2004	Welcome to the site Arad. There is a few things I'd like to address. firstly bio is far to short to be approved at this time. Even with your talent not being approved at this time I would still like you to flesh out the rest of your bio. Each Paragragh should have four or five good sentances if not one or two more. If you need help with your writing there are quite a few people here that would more than likely jump at the oppertunity to help you. This is an example of a good paragraph Quote: Sapphira smiled as she walked through the Tower grounds, she had taken the day off, and that morning had concidered making a trip of the day and going somewhere far off, but had changed her mind. One day was not enough, even though the travel took no time at all, rather she decided to just stay in Tar Valon today, and enjoy her home. It was really an amazing place, something Sapphira could never fail to be awed by, when she was not doing paperwork for the Tower, she really did love her life in Tar Valon. She looked at the Tower walls, and made a decision, this was not a day to be spent in the Tower, it was a day for the city. It was still winter, though not the heart of it anymore, the cold did not bother Sapphira, but it did make the city a bit less crowded. Not that anything could make Tar Valon anything less than packed. She turned her steps toward the nearest gate in the Tower walls, and could not suppress a small grin at the thought of what Rialt would think if he found out about her leaving the Tower on her own. That thought soon led her to her last visit to the city, a less plesant thought, not the first time in her life that the Power had been helpless to her, but the first time in quite a while. She sighed, her past two visits to the city had been less than wonderful, why did she continue to try? Sapphira shook her head and pushed those thoughts away, they would only ruin her day, this one would be better, she was sure. And only partly because she knew it could not be much worse. Now I don't expect you to write something of this quality. Mother is an excilent writer, but it is something to strive for. If you have any questions about this you can PM me or the M'heal or any other Admin on the site and you will have your questions answered. A few other things I must address. There are two towers right beside each other in Tarvalon. The Black Tower and The White Tower, I believe there is a history writen somewhere I will find it and post the link for you. Another thing, Tear does not have a Royal family. It still has high lords although one is more powerful then the rest he is still not the king so thus not Royal.
	Bio In my youth a made a vow that I forever now must fight. Though the Dark One has his grip around me, My heart beats free. My punishment is for all to see The mark of the Dark One on my soul As I strain to fight for the light And prove my worth to the Creator.


Radgar	Aug 1 2006, 02:25 AM Post #3
Dedicated / Senior Member, Lost during the War Posts: 236 Group: Retired Members Member #27 Joined: September 17, 2004	The history is writen here. You should give it a read before you fix up your bio The hisory
	Bio In my youth a made a vow that I forever now must fight. Though the Dark One has his grip around me, My heart beats free. My punishment is for all to see The mark of the Dark One on my soul As I strain to fight for the light And prove my worth to the Creator.


Marian Skylas	Aug 1 2006, 11:10 AM Post #4
Retired Gray Sister Posts: 1,418 Group: Retired Members Member #61 Joined: October 31, 2004	Welcome to the Tower, m'dear! I've got a couple pointers for you too. Since Radgar already caught your history, I'll address personality. You've got an outline already started by what you've written, but think about it this way - you're describing a human being's complex personality. I'm sure, for example, that if you were describing your own personality or your friend's, you'd be able to come up with a lot more than that. Ask yourself questions about the character - how does he get along with other people, does he get angry or depressed, when is he polite and rude, etc.? I'd also suggest taking a look at other characters' biographies in order to get an idea of how to write your own, as well as what sorts of things should be put into yours. Don't hesistate to ask for any help! Mostly everyone here is willing to extend a helping hand.
	<center>being eaten by school </center>


Rialt Erydinan	Nov 6 2006, 07:43 PM Post #5
Asha'man al'N'dore al'Mordero Posts: 2,239 Group: Asha'man Member #6 Joined: August 28, 2004	please take some time out to finish this up, we'd love to have you!
	Former M'hael Biography ~ Age of Legends Healing ~ Currently conceiving something altogether memorizing and maniacal


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