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| Whatever It Takes (The Library); OtA | |
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| Topic Started: Nov 29 2007, 05:53 AM (863 Views) | |
| Adena Moren | Feb 19 2008, 02:48 PM Post #16 |
Accepted
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Adena listened as Farina explained that she had originally wanted to be Gaidar. Interesting, Adena wondered how many men and women came to join the Gaidin, but instead put on the uniform of a soldier or novice. And at that, how many came to the Towers hoping they could channel, but then enlisted as a recruit? She had never considered that before, but surely there must be many. Adena put that thought out of her mind for the moment though, and listened to the rest of Farina's answer. She said that it had to do with the power and freedom of being Aes Sedai, and with all the things that one Aes Sedai could accomplish. She gave no specifics though, and left Adena wanting more detail for her answer. If Farina had wanted to say more surely she would have, but Adena thought that it in this circumstance, it would probably be alright for her to ask another question. What was the best way to ask, in order to get the Accepted to answer though? What would put Farina most at ease, and most willing to answer? Would it be genuine interest, or perhaps if Adena still appeared uncertain, Farina would be eager to convince her. Adena thought for a moment, judging the best way to ask, but finally, spoke without having decided. "You can be free as a seamstress or an innkeeper, can't you? You would have an income, and you would be your own master, while here you have to answer to the Hall and the Amyrlin. And what sort of things can one sister accomplish anyway? It seems to me that the ones who accomplish much are the ones who are also the most manipulative." Adena did not think that she needed to draw the final connection- Farina claimed she would be an honest Aes Sedai, so how much could she really accomplish? Regardless of how Farina took her question though, Adena was interested in the answer, and despite her initial desire to prove this woman wrong- at least in Adena's own mind, whether Farina changed her mind or not did not really matter -she found herself intrigued by some of the things Farina was saying. Not that she was about to tell the Accepted that- most Accepted certainly did not need any help thinking too much of themselves. Adena waited for Farina to answer, thinking about some of the things she might say. Being Amadician, Adena had never had any experience with Aes Sedai before arriving in the Tower- Aes Sedai tended to stay away from that area of the world, after all. Perhaps Farina had more experience than Adena with Aes Sedai outside of the Tower. Adena wondered what that would be like. Here in the Tower, Aes Sedai were imposing, but they basically had themselves, the Asha'man, and the Younglings and Gaidin for company, so they were all on a more even level. When a sister was out of the Tower, she would have an incredible advantage. Most people never had dealings with Aes Sedai, so how intimidated would they be? How easy would it be to tie strings to people, or simply to convince them to do what you needed without trying to manipulate. Seamstresses and innkeepers certainly could not do that, royals or high nobles could to an extent, but Aes Sedai certainly perfected the skill. Perhaps that was what Farina meant by power. Well, Adena would soon find out, she thought. |
 Masking the Glow, Folding Light, Inverting | |
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| Farina Aileen | Feb 20 2008, 06:33 AM Post #17 |
Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah, Lost during the War
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Adena wasn't satisfied with Farina's answer, but asked what exactly a single sister could accomplish in a manner that borderlined rude. Farina understood that the woman didn't want to be Aes Sedai and had some... interesting thoughts about them, but the comments she now made came very close to personal remarks, and Farina was sure that the novice realized it. She was a bit disgruntled, but she wasn't going to ruin this good conversation - or rather, an effort to convince her to stay in the Tower - by handing out a punishment now. Maybe she was being too lenient, but she was sure that Adena was not going to complain, so what did it matter? Nine years in the Tower had probably taught the novice that this kind of behaviour normally wasn't acceptable, so it was unlikely that she would try the same with someone else in other circumstances. "If a woman is a deft seamstress and her deepest desire is... say, to raise a family, then she would free as a seamstress and could accomplish her dreams as one. But if a woman's greatest wish is to study the Age of Legends, she could become a Brown Aes Sedai and she would have access to every library in the world and every historian would be willing to share their discoveries with her. If her desire is to bring peace and end wars, she could become a Gray Aes Sedai and every ruler would have to listen to what she says and answer to her demands of a treaty and peace. If her desire is to reveal and destroy Shadowspawn and Darkfriends, she could become a Red Aes Sedai and have all the resources of the Red Shen in her use. My desire is to fight for justice, against the Shadow, for the Towers and for mankind. Could I do that as a seamstress? No, but as a Green Aes Sedai, I can." "And you don't have to be particularly manipulative for any of those. Except, maybe, for the Gray Aes Sedai part. You don't have to manipulate to get historians to speak to you, they will do that because they honour and perhaps fear you. The power comes with their respect, not with manipulation. There are some causes that require manipulation, like some of the Blue Ajah's causes and maybe the Gray's, but most of them do not outright require manipulation. I am convinced that you can follow your dreams as an Aes Sedai without resorting to manipulation." Farina thought for a while for something more to add, but finally leaned back a bit as a sign that she was finished. She was eager to know what the novice would think of that. Would she be satisfied with Farina's arguments now? |
 Talents: Cloud Dancing, Healing, Keeping Deceased during the War Avatar artwork © Lee Bogle | |
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| Adena Moren | Feb 22 2008, 10:53 PM Post #18 |
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Accepted
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Farina's thoughts did not really show on her face, so Adena had no idea what to expect. When the Accepted answered, Adena was far from disappointed. Adena really had not known what the woman would say, but her answer had not only given the answer for Farina, but probably for half of the Accepted in the Tower, as she discussed several Ajahs. The power was not what was important, it was what the Aes Sedai could do with the power. What a contrast to nobles, who wanted power so that they could get more power, and then use that power to lord over those of lower status. According to Farina, the Aes Sedai genuinely wanted to help the world. She went on to say that although some sisters found it necessary to be manipulative, it was not really necessary. The power and status associated with the name "Aes Sedai" was enough for most people to do what you needed them to without having to manipulate them. That was a good thought, but Adena was skeptical about how practical that ideal was. They had already been over that though, Farina did not think manipulation would be necessary, and that was her own perogative, Adena simply chose not to believe too easily. She leaned back a bit in her chair. What could she say now? Farina had met all her questions, and had answered them all. Adena was mostly satisfied with what she had said. That did not mean that Adena suddenly wanted to become Aes Sedai though, which was why this conversation had begun. What was she supposed to say now? She did not really have any more questions, and Farina had not asked her anything. She wondered if she could just tell Farina it had been a nice chat, but it really didn't matter much. That might be too rude though, and Adena decided not to take the chance. That thought sparked another though, a different way of saying nearly the same thing, but with considerably less insolence. "I'm glad you have a good reason to become Aes Sedai, Accepted Farina," Adena said, "but I guess to answer your first question, at the very base of it I don't want to because I don't have a good reason like that, I've never thought about it." She almost said more, but stopped herself. That was more than enough, and the woman certainly would not want to know any more. Adena could not help herself thinking through what she was going to say all the same. She had grown up in Amadicia, she had never had dealings with Aes Sedai, and since coming here, she had only had a negative view of the sisters. Never in her life had she wanted to become Aes Sedai, and never had she given a moment's thought, had never seen any reason to change her mind. She only wanted to stop channeling accidentally, after that, well she did not know yet, but never had her plans for the future included a fringed shawl or Great Serpent ring. |
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Masking the Glow, Folding Light, Inverting | |
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| Farina Aileen | Mar 5 2008, 06:58 AM Post #19 |
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Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah, Lost during the War
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(OOC: Sorry it's quite late and a bit short.) Farina was sure that she had given Adena something to think about. She didn't say anything right away, and Farina wondered if she would find a way to question what Farina had said. Everything she had said was her own personal opinions, of course, but she was sure that most Accepted would not disagree with them. Most Aes Sedai would probably find them suitable. But most Aes Sedai would probably try to hide the fact that they were manipulative, at least from novices and 'common people'. Farina did not deny the fact that in reality some Aes Sedai were very manipulative indeed, but she was still adamant in her opinion that you didn't have to be manipulative in order to be Aes Sedai. By the Light, she hoped that it was true. Soon she would know, when she finally wrapped the shawl around her shoulders and started her work with other Aes Sedai as an equal. "I'm glad you have a good reason to become Aes Sedai, Accepted Farina," Adena finally said, "but I guess to answer your first question, at the very base of it I don't want to because I don't have a good reason like that, I've never thought about it." Farina was rather satisfied with that. Adena had understood what Farina had tried to explain, and maybe that knowledge would some day help the woman to decide to stay in the Tower. Farina would not be able to force the novice to choose a suitable reason to stay in the Tower, she would have to find one herself. Farina hoped that she would before her stay in the Tower could end. Farina smiled a little. "I hope that one day you will think about it. I see that you still wish to leave the Tower, but I suggest that you get to know the Ajahs and their purposes and maybe some individual Aes Sedai if you haven't already. If you are to leave the Tower, wouldn't it be better to know what exactly you are leaving behind? If you have full knowledge of the different opportunities the Tower has to offer, you will have no regrets later if you do wish to leave in spite of these opportunities." Farina did not say out loud her probably obvious hope that while doing so Adena would find a suitable goal that would want her to become Aes Sedai. "Please think about it." |
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Talents: Cloud Dancing, Healing, Keeping Deceased during the War Avatar artwork © Lee Bogle | |
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| Adena Moren | Mar 5 2008, 05:12 PM Post #20 |
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Accepted
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Adena waited to see what Farina would say to her comment. She thought that she might have too forthcoming again, but at least she had stopped herself before she said anymore. Farina was kind in her reply, saying that she understood, but she encouraged Adena to look into the Ajahs and at least see what the Tower had to offer before she made up her mind. Adena thought about that for a moment. Perhaps that would not be so bad, and yet, it might just be another ploy by the Tower to keep her trapped her until they could tie such strings that she could never get away. Until they could somehow convince her that she did not want to get away. Was that the same as truly wanting to stay? She stopped her mind going down that path, it would probably lead to no real conclusion other than a headache. She was no White, to absorb herself in such logic, although perhaps a White could answer the question. Not that Adena would ever ask, but it was an interesting idea. "I suppose that wouldn't be such a bad idea," she conceded, but did not say that although she agreed to give the Tower a chance, it would not be much of a chance. She did not know where to begin anyway. She could look at the Ajahs, she supposed, but the Ajahs did not readily give information away to novices. Too many did not stay in the Tower for them to give away much information, Light, they hardly gave information to the Accepted, and they were sealed to the Tower. Novices were not supposed to think about Ajah anyway, and it was not even encouraged for Accepted, though everyone knew they all did. Farina was a perfect example, she had already chosen her Ajah, and had even told Adena which she had chosen. She wondered if she should say something else. Farina had originally seemed to want Adena to change her mind, but she had been very accepting of Adena saying that she did not have a reason to become Aes Sedai. Yet, Adena felt like she needed to say something else...but she did not know what. So she stayed silent, and waited to see what Farina would say. She wondered what the woman would say next, and what else she had up her sleeve to convince Adena to stay here. It seemed to Adena that the Aes Sedai had taken notice of her, and were now sending intiates to cross her path who would, somehow, say something to make Adena completely uncertain of her future or what she thought. Farina had not done that, necessarily, but Adena had agreed to look into the future the Tower could offer, which was a suggestion she would have laughed at a short time ago. She could see her life changing, but some part of her said that it was alright, despite the fact that these changes had not been her idea, maybe it would not be bad in the end. The end, however, was a mystery that made Adena more than a little nervous. |
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Masking the Glow, Folding Light, Inverting | |
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| Farina Aileen | Mar 7 2008, 06:04 AM Post #21 |
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Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah, Lost during the War
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"I suppose that wouldn't be such a bad idea," Adena finally conceded. Farina smiled. If the novice did study the Ajahs and what it meant to be Aes Sedai and still decided that she wanted to leave, Farina knew that there was nothing she could do about it. She hoped that she had somewhat helped Adena around her negative ideas about Aes Sedai, and there was still hope to make Adena see that not all Aes Sedai were what she thought. But if Adena did see Aes Sedai as they were and understood the diversity within their goals and still decided that the position as an Aes Sedai had nothing to offer her, Farina would have to give in. She would never understand such a decision, because in her opinion, being Aes Sedai opened the doors for so many different things, but she would accept it. She would just have to make sure that Adena was fully informed. There was little chance that she would deny the possibilities what came with being Aes Sedai when she managed to get rid of her prejudices. Farina did feel like she had won. She hadn't been able to convince the novice to stay, but Adena had agreed that getting to know the Ajahs was a good idea, so Aes Sedai would continue Farina's work in showing what the Tower could offer. She just hoped that Adena would find that reason to become Aes Sedai. She wondered what to say next. Adena had asked no questions, but she did not show impatience with their conversation either. Farina could not think of more arguments on their subject, so she decided that a change could be in order. "Aside from all that, how have you settled in? I know the chores are tedious, but have you taking any interesting classes?" |
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Talents: Cloud Dancing, Healing, Keeping Deceased during the War Avatar artwork © Lee Bogle | |
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| Adena Moren | Mar 7 2008, 06:44 PM Post #22 |
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Accepted
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Farina accepted Adena's remark, and to Adena's surprise, did not make any further efforts to convince Adena to stay in the Tower. Rather, she asked how Adena had settled in, and about her classes. How had she settled in? Light, she hardly remember settling in, that had been so long ago. She thought about the classes. Interesting? Well, she had certainly learned a lot over the past nine years on a variety of subjects. Customs and cultures classes were common, Aes Sedai had to be comfortable in any setting, after all, so future Aes Sedai had to know all about those settings. "Settling in was fine," she said after a moment. A complete lie if she was honest, but much easier than telling the truth. She did not particularly want to share her entire life story with this woman she had only met moments ago, this was just easier. "As far as classes, I've learned some interesting things about other nations, and I took a class a few years ago about the Age of Legends that was particularly interesting." The Age of Legends was certainly not something she had ever learned about in Amadicia. The Age of Legends was hardly remembered outside of Tar Valon, and when it was mentioned, it was usually with an air of disdain, as it was strongly connected with channelers. Even when she had taken the class however, when she believed that channelers were Darkfriends, she had been amazed at what the ancient Aes Sedai had been able to do. In the years since the taint on saidin had been cleansed, Aes Sedai and Asha'man had uncovered many fascinating things that could be done with the Power, but they had never succeeded in bringing about another Age of Legends. "What is the most interesting class you've taken?" Adena asked Farina, hoping that the Accepted would not mind. Oh stop worrying, she told herself, the woman hasn't minded any questions yet, she's not going to start now! She pushed the worry away, and waited for Farina to answer. This was sure to be a more interesting question than the one she had just answered. Farina had probably taken many more classes than Adena, and would be able to give some insight on what was most interesting. The very interesting classes probably came as Accepted anyway, they were far more individualized, and gave more opportunity for interaction. That was something Adena would probably never experience if she left the Tower however. She waited to see what Farina would say, perhaps it would be a novice class that Adena could look into, and see what was so very interesting about it. |
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| Farina Aileen | Mar 12 2008, 06:26 AM Post #23 |
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Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah, Lost during the War
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Adena did not want to approach the subject of settling in. She just said it had been fine, but didn't elaborate. Farina didn't push her. It was a rather personal question, and could touch some personal sorrows. Farina's settling in was not a story she shared willingly, so she didn't blame Adena for not sharing hers. Farina hardly knew her, anyway. Finally Adena did answer her other question properly, mentioning a class about the Age of Legends as one of the most interesting. Farina was not that interested in history, but she did enjoy the stories about the amazing Age of Legends. And she was rather interested in other nations too, when she thought about it. She just couldn't stand all the classes about politics and social structurs, vital as they were. She was more interested in the fashion and common customs and characteristics, not politics and etiquette. And then Adena asked her the same. "To tell you the truth, as a novice, I hated almost all classes." There was no harm in telling that, and it was the truth. Farina had always been a lively young woman, and sitting still in a classroom trying to learn was one of her dreads. Most novice classes were just that. "But I got used to them, in a way, when I realized that they were required and there was no way out of them. I did learn a lot of interesting or at least really important things, like Tower history and hierarchy. But as an Accepted, I can concentrate more freely on the things that I really find interesting. Of course there are still classes required for all, but even those are taught more individually, so I can ask questions and get more information on those parts that I think are important or don't fully understand. On most subjects are classes and areas that I don't enjoy, but which are important because that allows me to continue to the areas that I do find interesting. Like with channeling. I hated the first classes because I was a slow learner, but now that I am more advanced I learn more quickly and can do much more complex things. I think the same goes for most subjects; I didn't like learning the basic stuff, but when I progressed, more and more interesting things presented themselves." "I can't really name one class that is the most interesting of all. Mostly because I think that the most interesting classes are yet to come. Like the Warder bond, Ajah secrets and hierarchy and battle weave classes. You can't study those as an Accepted." She said that with longing in her voice. Light, how she wished for the shawl! "No matter how much you learn, there is always something more that you wish to know. Don't you agree?" |
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Talents: Cloud Dancing, Healing, Keeping Deceased during the War Avatar artwork © Lee Bogle | |
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| Adena Moren | Mar 13 2008, 10:13 AM Post #24 |
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Accepted
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Farina's answer was longer than Adena expected. She said she did not enjoy most classes, and had hated almost all of her novice classes. That surprised Adena a bit, why would Farina ask whether Adena had taken any good classes if she had hated all of hers? Just making conversation, Adena supposed, but why had she not chosen something she was more interested in? Ah well, no point worrying about it now. She said that her classes as Accepted were better, but not much, and what she really looked forward to were the things only Aes Sedai knew. Of course, Aes Sedai had weaves women could not learn until they earned the shawl, just as there were weaves women could not attempt until they had the Great Serpent ring, such as Healing. From her speech, it was very clear that Farina wanted nothing more than to wear the shawl of the Aes Sedai. Adena had always known there were such women, but in her experience most of them were giddy young girls who wanted to be special enough to have that power. Farina, however, seemed to be anything but a giddy little girl. Adena had no idea how old the woman was, her youthful appearance was certainly not helpful in deciding after all. But Farina was a woman who clearly had sense, and yet only wanted to become Aes Sedai. Adena wondered what that must be like, and how many other such women there were. Maybe that was only the Accepted, they were generally older and more experienced in the Tower after all. It was something to think about later. Now, Farina had asked her a question. Not a question that required a long answer, but one that was worth considering. "There is certainly always something more to learn," Adena agreed. Coming here had been a perfect example of just how much Adena had not known. In Amadicia, she had thought she knew most things about the world, and perhaps from an Amadician standpoint she knew a fair amount, but now she knew that she was far from knowing very much at all. She wondered whether all cultures were as blind to some very major truths as Amadicians were. Or, for that matter, were all Amadicians as blindly arrogant as Adena had been? "You never really know how much there is to learn until you see the whole world from an entirely different perspective," she mused. Adena could see no danger in saying that. It just showed that Adena was willing to talk, but did not give anything away. It was certainly true though. Adena's world had been turned upside down when she came here. Or was it turned right side up? The thought came unbidden, but Adena could not shake it, she certainly knew more now than she had before, and although she was unsure about many things, she was now more aware of her ignorance, and more willing to do something about it. Had the Tower fixed her skewed perception of reality? If that was the case, then what would happen if she left the Tower? Would she find a new way to see the world that was as real as her old Amadician views and her new Tower views? Or would she always remember what the Tower had done, and retain the influences of this place? Was the world view Adena had gained over the past nine years accurate, or was it as skewed as her childhood, Amadician perspective? How would she ever know the truth? Adena forcibly pushed these thoughts away. There was no use pondering them now. She would just come upon unanswerable question after unanswerable question. Light, she sounded more like a White that she would have thought possible. Right now, she would rather just have a conversation with Farina, who was not so bad, even if she had pushed Adena to consider staying in this place she had hated for so long. But not anymore. It was not her favorite place, but she no longer hated it, that took too much energy, and Adena had finally realized that it did no good. |
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| Farina Aileen | Mar 29 2008, 04:48 AM Post #25 |
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Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah, Lost during the War
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Adena did agree, and Farina was glad of that. It showed that Adena truly wished to learn, which was a good trait in a novice. No, it was a good trait in a novice to truly wish to learn the things novices were taught. Anyway, Farina hoped that Adena's curiosity would make sure that she did explore the Ajahs. Farina had not gotten a good idea of the novice's personality yet, so she could not tell which Ajah could interest her. She had shown no particular interest in the Green Ajah when Farina had brought it up, so maybe one of the more peaceful ones could fit her. She certainly had some strong opinions and wasn't afraid to reveal them to Farina when she had asked, so maybe a political Ajah would suit her. The Blue or the Gray, perhaps. But Adena had expressly said that she disliked Aes Sedai because they were manipulative, so maybe those two Ajahs would not allure her. Farina pushed the thoughts out of her mind; it was not her place to try and choose an Ajah for the woman. She did not know her well enough to even guess, so there was no point in it. "You never really know how much there is to learn until you see the whole world from an entirely different perspective," Adena finished. Farina only nodded, even though that sentence certainly enticed her curiosity. There was something behind that statement, but Adena did not elaborate, so Farina didn't ask. Had she wanted to reveal what was behind it, she would have said. Her silence meant that she wished not to. But Farina agreed all the same. Farina had had a lot of different upheavels in her life, totally new situations that had forced her to revalue her priorities and face her own ignorance and stupid choices. She wondered if becoming Aes Sedai would be another upheavel. Farina had some idea of the things that she would be taught when she was raised, but the Aes Sedai would not reveal all of them until she did have the shawl. All in all, she knew exactly what Adena meant. "Right now, what is your greatest interest? What is the subject that you wish to study more?" Farina had not seen the title of the book Adena had been reading, and she wondered if she had read the book only to seem busy and not because it was particularly interesting. |
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Talents: Cloud Dancing, Healing, Keeping Deceased during the War Avatar artwork © Lee Bogle | |
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| Adena Moren | Mar 29 2008, 11:53 AM Post #26 |
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Accepted
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Farina did not ask Adena to explain what she meant about needing a whole new perspective to see some ignorances. Adena was very thankful for that. She did not want to tell the woman about her childhood and life since coming here, but neither did she want to lie. A lie was a perfectly good way to ruin a lovely conversation, even if the other person never found out about it. At least, that was what her wetnurse had always told her. Her mother, despite having many strong convictions, had never been adamant about lying, as long as no one was lying to her. Adena supposed that was part of being a noble, the Great Game did not call for outright lying when it could be avoided, but occasionally the truth did have to be bent or somtimes even broken to achieve your own ends. That made Adena wonder, Aes Sedai were supposed to be masters of Daes Dae'mar, yet by the Oath they all took, they could not lie. What an interesting game it would become if no one could lie, manipulation and twisting words would come to a whole new level in that case. When Farina spoke again, she did not follow the line of conversation and continue to speak about ignorance or new perspectives. Rather, she introduced a new topic, although it was somewhat related to the topic of classes. She asked what Adena was most interested in right now. The question gave Adena a moment's pause. What was she interested in? "Well," she began slowly, "I guess what I'm most interested in is breaking my block, though I'm beginning to doubt that will ever happen." Other than that, she had not developed a major interest in any one subject really. Some interesting classes, and some interesting books read, but nothing really worth mentioning. And breaking her block really was foremost in her mind. Almost nine years, and she still had a block. How many women took nine years to break a block? I'm probably the first, Adena thought sullenly. If she could have only broken it in a reasonable amount of time, like most women, she could have been gone from this place long ago, and truly making her own life by now. Adena could not very well ask Farina what she was most interested in, she had already told Adena very explicitly that she wanted to become a Green sister, and slay shadowspawn. Or, Adena presumed she wanted to slay shadowspawn, since that was what the Green primarily focused on. Adena had never actually seen any real shadowspawn, growing up in Amadicia, they were unheard of. Of course, in novice classes, they were shown pictures, and some teachers made life-size images with the Power. But a real, moving, attacking Trolloc or Fade- or even something worse- the very thought frightened Adena. And yet there were so many women who were willing to dedicate their lives to just that cause. It was risky and dangerous, yet it was worth it for so many women. Why? Maybe they were the women who had had real-life run-ins with shadowspaawn, but surely that could not have happened to everyone- especially women who were not from the Borderlands. Not that Adena could very well ask Farina why she wanted to be a Green, that would most certainly be intruding. Farina had not asked Adena to tell any more about her new perspectives, so Adena would do the same for Farina. |
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| Farina Aileen | Mar 30 2008, 09:47 AM Post #27 |
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Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah, Lost during the War
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Adena admitted that her greatest interest was breaking her block. Farina hadn't expected that, but she understood it completely. She could not imagine what it would be like, having a barrier between you and the sweet Power that allowed you to channel only under certain special circumstances. She had not been a Wilder, and she knew only a few women who had come to the Tower with a block, but theirs had not been as difficult as Adena's. Her block had to be difficult if the Aes Sedai hadn't been able to break it in nine years. But she was surprised that Adena doubted if they ever manage to break it. That might explain some of the disdain the woman had for Aes Sedai; even though Aes Sedai were wise and experts in the area of the One Power, they hadn't been able to help Adena yet. Adena might not believe it, but Farina was sure that everything had been done to help break Adena's block, even though it had not succeeded yet. The White Tower did not allow a channeler's abilities to go to waste, and even with those who were not strong enough to join the ranks of Aes Sedai, they still trained them enough to control the Power without killing themselves. Adena would stay in the Tower until the block was broken and she was taught to channel, may it take another year or decade. But Farina doubted that Adena wanted to hear that, so she decided to take a more positive approach. "Don't give up hope. I have never heard of a woman whose block remained unbroken. It might take a while, but some day it will break." She said that with the most certain voice she could muster. Sometimes she hoped that she had already sworn the Oath so others could believe her words to be true as well. "What kind of block do you have? You don't have to answer, I know it's a bit personal," Farina added hastily. Farina was curious, but she didn't want to pry. For all she knew, it could be something painfully personal or embarassing. |
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Talents: Cloud Dancing, Healing, Keeping Deceased during the War Avatar artwork © Lee Bogle | |
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| Adena Moren | Mar 30 2008, 04:42 PM Post #28 |
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Accepted
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Farina seemed to understand about wanting a block broken, but she did not return with any stories about her own block, so Adena presumed she had never experienced a block personally. Well, most women had not, most women were brought or came to the Tower before they began to channel, or at the very least before they developed a block. Farina assured Adena that her block would be broken one day, that she had never heard of a block that was not broken, and then asked what sort of block Adena had, quickly adding that she did not have to answer if she did not want to. Well, of course Farina had never heard of a block that stayed unbroken, why would the Towers flaunt their failures? In all her novice classes, Adena had never learned about an outright failure of the Towes. Perhaps Accepted were taught those things though. Accepted, who were Sealed to the Tower, and would not run off into the wide world with that secret information. Of course, Farina could have done just that, and the Aes Sedai did not seem careless enough to let something like that happen. Maybe, then, the sisters learned of the Towers' failures, or perhaps only the Amyrlin and M'hael themselves knew the full story. Adena was grateful that Farina had given her the opportunity not to share her block, it showed that the other woman was at least sensitive enough to know that a block was a sore spot for nearly every woman who was held back by one. And some blocks could be embarassing or quite personal. Adena did not really have such a problem, except that admitting the nature of her block also revealed that she had a rather quick temper. Not that it mattered, it was probably common knowledge that she was often angry. "I can't channel unless I'm angry, sometimes I have to be very angry before I can channel," she said simply. It was an odd thing that, some days Adena did not have to be much beyond frustrated in order to touch the Source, and other days she had to be utterly irate. Those days were the dangerous ones, those were the days when she was less likely to have control over the Power- although after nine years, even in her hottest rage, she had learned to keep from hurting people. Just because she could not channel by choice did not mean she could not learn anything about the One Power. The Aes Sedai had made her very aware of that distinction early on, and although she was given a bit more leeway because of her block, she was still expected to learn as much as she could. Light, but Adena truly could not wait to break her block, what a glorious day that would be. Her future would suddenly be open to her, only a bit more training to make sure she could really control saidar, and then she would be free to leave. Most women chose to run away, but Adena knew there were other ways out. If you made it very clear that you refused to become Aes Sedai, they would not force you. They would not force any woman who did not desire to join their ranks any further than she wished. The point of the novice rank was to instill that desire into women, but when it did not work, then at the very least, they had to be taught control over their abilities. Adena had been in that second group for many years now, although after today she was not sure where she would be able to place herself. She did not have to determine her whole future just yet though. First was the block. That Light-forsaken, stubborn block that would not be broken no matter what the Aes Sedai tried. The memories of block breaking sessions made Adena blush, these women had no sense of decency or propriety, they would try anything to shock, scare, embarass, or trick her into channeling, and they were certainly not daunted by failure. |
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Masking the Glow, Folding Light, Inverting | |
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| Farina Aileen | Mar 31 2008, 11:09 AM Post #29 |
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Aes Sedai of the Green Ajah, Lost during the War
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Adena did not look shocked or hurt after hearing the question, so Farina supposed that it had been a safe thing to ask after all. Adena simply answered that she could not channel unless she was angry. Farina supposed that was common enough; in her knowledge, most blocks depended on the person being under a certain emotion, although there were some that depended on the environment or some other external detail. And that wasn't all of it, Farina had heard that blocks could be downright peculiar sometimes. And they were all individual, even if they were somewhat similar. From what Adena said, Farina figured that her block allowed her to channel at a varying level of anger each time. That was quite interesting. Farina had never been present in a block breaking class, so she wasn't sure what kind of methods the Aes Sedai used. But she supposed that they had seen a lot of blocks relating to anger, so they had to have some traditional ways to try and break a block like that. Apparently traditional methods hadn't worked on Adena. Farina wondered what could be done next. But she surely was no expert, so she didn't waste her time bothering. It was a rather interesting subject though, something that Farina could possibly explore at some point. But she was at a disadvantage to some Aes Sedai; the experts were probably those who had had a block themselves. "Are you able to attend channeling classes regardless?" she asked. Those who had a block could still channel, and Farina supposed that they would have to be taught at least enough so that they wouldn't hurt themselves or other people. And they would have to learn to channel consciously, not involuntarily. But they would not truly learn how to control the One Power before they could channel at will. At least that was what Farina thought. "How much can you control the Power already?" |
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Talents: Cloud Dancing, Healing, Keeping Deceased during the War Avatar artwork © Lee Bogle | |
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| Adena Moren | Apr 21 2008, 12:31 PM Post #30 |
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Accepted
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((OOC: Dear Light, I'm so sorry this has taken so long, I didn't realize it had been so long!)) Farina seemed interested in the subject of Adena's block, and followed the topic. Well, that seemed natural enough to Adena, why would the other woman not be curious? She had never had a block, and so this was one thing that she would never experience. She asked Adena about how training with a block worked, whether she still attended channeling classes, and how well she could control the Power. Adena nodded as she began her answer. "Yes, they say that even if I can't use the Power while I'm in a class, I can still see the threads, and therefore can learn the theory. Most of my teachers, once they find out I have a block, are willing to give me some leeway, though not as much as I might like. And as long as I'm angry enough to channel, and can maintain the anger, I can learn as well as anyone in the class. I can control the Power quite well really, after nine years, even with a block, I've mastered most of what they teach novices, it's just I can't always prove that mastery. I'm sure that once I break my block, they won't force me to stay much longer." Adena hoped that last statement did not come off wrong. She had told Farina that she would look into the Ajahs and see what being Aes Sedai could offer, and that was exactly what she planned to do. However, that did not mean that she would still be stuck here, and it did not mean that she had any plans of staying here any longer than she had to. She had not meant to imply that she would be leaving as soon as her block was broken, just that she would be glad when that was finally an option. A very probable option, she thought. Regardless of what she told Farina, and no matter what the Accepted said to her, she still eagerly looked forward to the day when she could finally set foot out of the Tower grounds. Freedom, to be out of the Tower, what an incredible possibility that had filled her head for so long. It had taken on a different appearance lately, and although it was a different goal, now Adena felt like she might actually get there, instead of being broken long before that could happen. She really did not know where this new attitude had come from, a few people simply made observations and said things that they probably did not think were very important, and yet Adena's whole life was different. Clearly offhand remarks were more important than she had ever before considered. That was a thought to bring down a good mood, Adena realized. How many idle, caustic remarks had she made throughout her life? How many of those same sort of remarks had she made on purpose? If a few simple things could positively change Adena's life, could not remarks also negatively impact a person? Light, how much damage had she done over the years? Had people even cared what she thought, or had they simply brushed it off as the words of an ignorant, self-important, stuck up brat? She pushed those thoughts away. They were not things she could change, she could only change the things she said and did in the future, and the impacts those things would make on others' lives. She turned her attention back to Farina and their conversation. |
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Masking the Glow, Folding Light, Inverting | |
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6:35 PM Nov 25
