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mc48
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Nov 11 2004, 06:22 PM
Post #1
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- Posts:
- 1,467
- Group:
- calanderaccess
- Member
- #33
- Joined:
- August 16, 2004
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[align=center]A diary worth dying for... Or at least getting really, really hurt... [/align]
- Quote:
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EXT. ANCIENT HOUSE -- MORNING
Stanford (RORY CULKIN) rests his bike against the wall, then straightens his pants as he looks up at the house. It stands there, ancient and scary as ever in the chilly air of fall.
He steps towards the door and reaches for the doorknob when -- CRASH from inside the house. Startled, Stanford jumps
KNOX (O.S.) Damnit!
And instantly recoils at the swear word.
KNOX (O.S.) Stupid box!
Stanford drops to his knees and silently and shakingly edges towards the window. He peeks in through the glass...
INT. ANCIENT HOUSE -- MORNING
Where an intensely goofy-looking man, Knox (JOHNNY KNOXVILLE), violently kicks at an old fallen box.
KNOX (between kicks) Stupid... Stupid... Stupid...
As he gives the box a royal beating, another man, a smarmy- looking greaser, Nance (JUSTIN THEROUX), walks up and smacks him on the head.
KNOX Ow!
NANCE Knox, could you please quit kicking the box's rear end?!
Knox looks at the box. It reads: "THIS SIDE UP" with a red arrow pointing to the opening. His face reads: "Ahhh".
NANCE Stupid moron...
Knox sneers at the box, before continuing to dig into the other boxes as well. A beat. Then he looks up.
KNOX What did it look like, again?
Nance glares at him, incredulously.
NANCE Like an old damn diary!
Nance is already tossing over more boxes when
A CRASH of glass from the other side of the room startles them. Knox and Nance whip around, eying the remaining shards of the window and the offending stone that broke it.
NANCE Glass crack...
KNOX No kidding.
Nance cautiously walks over towards the window, feeling the window frame and sniffing the air like a seasoned tracker.
A SHADOW rushes past, behind them. Stanford, carrying a pole, ducks and rolls into the shadows behind a stuffed bear.
After a few more glances out the window and then around the room, Nance raises his finger with finality.
NANCE It's a daring adventure-loving kid!
Stanford's eyes widen in shock.
KNOX Whoa! How'd you know?
Nance shrugs.
NANCE Weren't you a kid once? Who else would be so stupid?
Knox grumbles.
Stanford breathes a sigh of relief. He peeks out from behind the grizzly, sees the two nosing into more antiques, and then starts glancing around, looking for the book.
From his level, he scans the room, scans the room, then spots it sitting under the dusty bed. Again, it seems to beckon at him. Cautiously, he sticks his metal pole out, weaves it through furniture, under the bed... Inches short.
Stanford grimaces, then pulls the pole back and leans it against the wall, next to a small window.
Then he slowly crawls out of the shadows.
As he tip-toes closer and closer towards the book...
KNOX Hey, Nance!
Stanford freezes in panic.
KNOX You checked under the bed?
Knox slowly turns around towards the bed, at Stanford's direction, finding...
KNOX It's a high bed... There's a lot of space, down there. Loooootsa place to put secret stuff!
From under the bed, Stanford's eyes anxiously dart left and right. Sweat glistens off his forehead. He grasps the diary in his hands, dust clinging to its cover.
Nance looks at Knox, incredulous.
NANCE Are you stupid?
KNOX Well...
NANCE That was rhetorical! Now, tell me, why would anyone put anything under their stinking bed?
Knox thinks for a moment, gives up. Nance flashes him an "I told you so" look. Knox grumbles and kicks another box.
Now that he has the book, Stanford eyes the front door and the impossible 10-feet dash to safety. He creeps closer to the edge, waits for the perfect moment but he's startled as
Nance slams another box onto the floor in frustration.
NANCE Fine! Check the stupid bed, already.
Uh oh.
Knox grins, "I told you so" and starts for the bed as
Stanford frantically looks around for an escape.
Knox half-skips over to the bed, leans down, then PULLS the bed-cover off to the side and onto the floor.
As he does this, there's a strange rolling/clunking sound but he doesn't notice. He peers under the bed.
KNOX Nope. Nothing.
NANCE See! I told you, you imbecile!
Knox gets up with a grunt, then stares at the pile bed-cover with frustration. He sneers at the sheets. Then KICKS it.
STANFORD (O.S.) Owww....
Nance and Knox whip around and stare at the pile in disbelief.
STANFORD (O.S.) ...wwwhooo... Whooooo.... Whoosh.
Finally, he stops his woeful attempts to sound like wind.
STANFORD (O.S.) Never mind.
A look of rage crosses Nance's face.
NANCE It's a stupid kid!
Nance YANKS the cover loose. Revealing...
STANFORD I think you meant daring and adventure- loving kid.
Nance and Knox stare at him, incredulous. Before spotting...
KNOX The book!
NANCE I think I meant, dead!
[align=center]Starring...
Nicholas Cage Rory Culkin
With...
Lindsay Lohan Spencer Breslin Justin Theroux and Johnny Knoxville

Last week's winner was SURESHOT
Again, post the title of the movie whose poster is the basis of the poster above for a prize of $1 million.
Good luck on this week's hunt! Stay tuned for more treasure-seeking opportunities brought to you by
The Montana Joneses The Search for the Blackpaw Gold
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RitchieSteven
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Nov 11 2004, 06:38 PM
Post #2
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NightTraveler
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Nov 11 2004, 07:59 PM
Post #3
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Sureshot
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Nov 11 2004, 08:03 PM
Post #4
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mc48
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Nov 12 2004, 03:55 AM
Post #5
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