| No Mans Land Sept 21st 2003 | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Jun 5 2011, 02:25 PM (63 Views) | |
| Arizonas Most Wanted | Jun 5 2011, 02:25 PM Post #1 |
|
Administrator
|
Jake Porter Vs Adrian Tanner Jr OOC: For the 1st time (atleast that i've seen, and atleast here in Oz) a joint promo between....... ......the two Opponents! This counts for both Jake and I. --------------------------------------------- [Jake Porter is......playing Basketball. That's right, I said basketball. Why is he playing basketball during a wrestling promo? Beats me, but he is. Maybe because it's at the very same place he wrestles at, Dandenong, maybe its not. In any case, does it matter? He is wearing his new "Jake is God" t-shirt and gray Nike shorts. He has just missed a shot. Jake Porter hears the door open. He takes a look. It's....Adrian Tanner sporting blue nike track shorts and a grey t-shirt reading "No You're Not" He steps into the stadium and smirks] Adrian: Ok Jake, Jobber times over, time to let the big boys play for a bit. Jake: Hey it's a free country... I think. Anyways, let's solve this. You vs me, JOBBER. Adrian: What? So I can own you twice in a few days? I'll pass. Jake: Ok..... Mars. Adrian: Ouch, thats harsh. I wouldnt even compare you to that pussy. [Adrian thinks for a second] Adrian: Fine....Your on. [Jake grins.] Jake: That's why I did it. Ok. You take the first shot, Adrianny boy. [Chucks Adrian the ball] Adrian: Alright, Watch how a true star does it. [Adrian shoots a three-pointer, it barely misses] [Porter grabs the ball] Porter: Oh yeah... true star. This is what you're going to be doing this sunday, missing. [Porter goes to the free throw line. He shoots. The ball hits the rim then rolls in.] Jake: Ha. Simple and yet effective. Adrian: Simple..... [Adrian easily nails the free throw shot] Adrian: heh, That's just like you. [Porter laughs sarcastically. He goes to the right end of the arch] Porter: You want fancy? You got it. [Porter shoots. It's a airball] Porter: Damn! The sun was in my eyes. Adrian: That gonna be your excuse sunday too? [Adrian walks to the top of the key, turns with his back facing the hoop and launches the ball over his head. Swish!] [Porter is not too pleased.] Jake: Lucky shot. You won't have that luck this Sunday. [Jake attempts the shot. He misses by an inch to the right. He fumes.] Adrian: I think those chair shots did more damage then you thought. Hey, there's a thought, when you lose just blame it on a concussion! [Adrian picks the ball up and walks to the other side of the three point line] Adrian: How is your head by the way? (he smirks) [Jake laughs] Jake: My head is just terrific, thank you for asking. Better than Murdock's record. [Porter grins] Jake: Nice attempt at interfering, by the way. Too bad it wasn't enough. And what you got won't be enough either. Adrian: Interfering's not my style. All I did was trying to make sure you didnt cheat. Er.....Anyways, I'd rather beat you clean with my sheer awesomeness, like this.... [Adrian shoots a picture perfect three pointer, With the sun in his eyes....] [Jake frowns. He goes to the spot] Jake: So I have sensitive eyes, sue me. Jake: How's Portman doing by the way? [Jake makes the shot. He pumps his fists.] Jake: I trust he won't be around for a while after that brutal shot I gave him. Adrian: Last time I talked to him, he thought he was Soutter. You have no idea how disgusting it is to wake up to a 200lb dwarf watching goat porn while scarfing down his 20th meal of the day Adrian: You'll pay..... [Adrian runs and launches the ball from half court, but the ball nails the backboard and bounces back] Jake: You'd be surprised. Look who I got to deal with. [Porter goes to behind the board.] Jake: I mean, most guys in Australia are kangaroo humpers. Jake: Not a pretty sight, if you ask me. I don't even know why Paul E. Sleazy set up the fed here. Maybe he likes them pouches. Now that I think of it, maybe that's why he's high on Y.... get it? hahahaha! [Jake sees the reaction on Adrian's face... blank stare.] Jake: Guess not. [Porter nails the shot. He smirks] [Adrian takes Jake's spot, and shoots, barely making the shot.] Adrian: You're going to have to do better than that. Wait,....forgot who I was talking to. [Adrian throws the ball toward Jake. It nails Jake hard in the chest.] Jake: Coming from someone with almost no decisive wins as of late.... [Jake goes to half court. Where Adrian was previously] Jake: And no pushes in sight.... [Jake launches a shot that by miracle, makes it] Jake: I always get lucky with that kind of shots.... not that I'll need it. Adrian: Atleast I beat Y. [Zing!] [Adrian takes the shot, and once again misses] Jake: Touche [Jake goes to the top of the key] Jake: And I'll be able to claim that I beat you. Adrian: You can claim it all you want. Hell, I could claim Mars isnt a giant pussy, but that wont change the facts. [Jake swishes the shot] Jake: Oh yeah, I'm on fire, baby! [Jake chuckles.] Jake: Unlike your partner, "Murcock" Adrian: James still beat Y. Hell, Y's lost to everyone. well,...except you [Adrian takes the shot from the top of the key and makes it, he shoves the ball back at porter.] Jake: A little agitated, aren't we? Anyways, Y won on a fluke. He had to pull my tights. Adrian: Pot-kettle-black. Jake: Refer back to my statement about Soutter marking out for Y. [Jake goes to just inside the arc. He shoots and misses] Jake: You can't win them all. [ Adrian grabs the ball and goes to the free throw line] Adrian: Maybe You cant... [Adrian throws a granny shot and makes it] Jake: A granny shot? And are you gonna give me a granny shot on Sunday? I assure you it won't work that time. Jake: And who do you got at the PPV? Wasn't it those fiesty Hellhounds? [Porter goes to the line and tosses it in one handed.] Jake: Good luck there. Adrian: James and I survived them the 1st time, and we'll beat them at DuD. I'd like to see you stand up to those freakin psychos. [Adrian grabs the ball and walks to the top of the other key.] Adrian: I'd almost bet the farm you'd fail, just like you'll fail this! [Adrian walks takes a running start from the other wall, runs hits the key and launches the ball across the court. It hits the rim, bounces, bounces again, then by a miracle, falls in.] Adrian: Damn! Have fun.... Jake: I don't need to worry about the Hellhounds. You do. And moreso, you need to worry about me. It's never good going into the PPV with a loss. Jake: As for that shot.... props to you. [Jake goes to the end of the court. He runs then stops abruptly and tosses the ball. It misses by a mile] Jake: I'll give that away. I'll save some energy for the match. Don't want to be huffing and puffing like you. [Jake smirks.] Jake: And you didn't survive. Brown only had pity on you two because you were getting your asses handed to you. Why he thought you guys would be a draw is beyond me. Porter's where money is. Adrian: Yeah...you sure proved that fact in that loss to that guy who everyone else's beaten. Adrian: And how were we getting our asses kicked? Was it when James chased Jonnie with his trusty wrench? Or when I was exploding with the high flying? [Adrian grabs the ball and shoots a running layup] Jake: And wrenches translates into success? [Jake does a slow jogging layup which goes in easily] Adrian: When your chasing Hardkore fucking Jonnie valentine? a bit Jake: Oh come off it. It's his Hellhounds. You're not wrestling the man himself. Jake: And obviously you've done something to piss off the fatman mac, Soutter to draw them, so it serves you right. Perhaps Soutter didn't like your antics in my match a few weeks ago. Adrian: I atleast beat Y. He obviously likes me more than you [Adrian laughs] Adrian: I'm not scared of the Hellbitches. The Goodfellas Own any team they step into the ring with. and in us vs them part 2, Ill prove that. [Adrian goes to the top left side of the three point line, turns around and throws a one-handed backwards shot that misses] Jake: You know what? You keep making those cracks about Y, it's just fueling the fire within. Granted, I may not have wrestled my best lately, but how can I compete with a Santa on crack? Jake: That'll change soon. [Jake thinks of a spot to shoot from. He goes to the bench and drinks some bottled water he brought. Then he walks back over. He goes to the middle left of the arc. He shoots one handed. He misses] Jake: Anyways, if I remember it took you, the midget and Murdock, and a backstage attack to almost beat me.... ALMOST being the key term. I would think you should worry about me..... Adrian: Pot, meet kettle. Werent you just whining about that guy that everyone but you has beaten holding Your tights to win? Adrian: Because that's kinda what I remember you doin, pal. [Adrian tries the one-handed reverse shot from the top left of the arc again. he barely makes it this time] Jake: Not my choice of victories. It was unfortunate my hand somehow got his tights. And anyways I knew if you were going to interfere on Murdock's behalf, I would have brought some backup, and then I wouldn't have to worry about pulling tights. [Jake goes to where Adrian was. He misses his shot] Adrian: Heh, that gives you J-O-B. How's that for irony? Jake: Damn! This sunday, I won't need to pull tights, because all it will take is a Last Call, and then the clean pin, 1-2-3. And my hand raised in victory. You know why? Because while you eat McNuggets, I'm studying tapes of you. I know all your strengths and weaknesses. And if I remember Martin Landau's quote in that godawful movie Ready to Rumble, "ATTACK HIS STRENGTHS". And I'm sure as hell not gonna do that. [Jake chuckles.] Adrian: riiiiight. Well, I'd look for your strengths, but you dont have any. [Adrian takes the same shot again, and makes it a little easier.] Jake: No you're thinking of Mars.... Adrian: Hasnt mars beaten Y? Jake: Hasn't Mysterio beaten Triple H? Adrian: And that has what to do with this? [Adrian stares at Jake] Adrian: ......Stupid question Jake: Underdogs always has their day. Y had his against me. [Adrian gives a strange look to Jake] Adrian: ah...The Chiarshots [Porter shrugs it off.] Jake: You know what? It may be true that everyone except me has beaten Y. It doesn't matter. Every match is a new match. What is the fact [complete with the finger quotes] is that I will beat you. Jake: It's a given Adrian: Man, the chairs mustve screwed you up bad. [The ring crew enters the gym. One member tells the two to go home. They have to set up the ring.] Jake: Ok. Adrian, I guess you win this game. Jake: Your only victory against me, I assure you. Now I got some things to take care of. See you sunday, sucker. [Adrian watches Jake leave and then turns to grabs his stuff from the bench. His cell phone rings.] Adrian: Hello? Hey James. You'll never guess who I just played ball with. O...k so you did. Yeah, he kept saying it was a fact that he'd beat me. Yeah, the chair shots. I told him that too. [Adrian grabs his stuff and walks to the door.] **FADE** |
![]() |
|
| Arizonas Most Wanted | Jun 5 2011, 02:26 PM Post #2 |
|
Administrator
|
Adrian: ohhh, ouch Jonnie. that hurts. It really does. Why dont you crawl back into your hole and go watch some more kidde porn. Although I'm sure you got your jollies from watching that promo. I am about your age range..... (adrian shudders and makes a gagging sound) Adrian: Man, I've never seen what everyone else sees with you. They call you some kind of legend, and until a few minutes ago, I believed "them." But this, this takes the fucking cake. I wont say your all talk and no action like Jakey boy, because your not, but your talk sucks. Ive been following you for awhile Jonnie, back to the Uwa actually, and all Ive ever seen from you are gay references and how you bang kiddies for fun. Well, you piece of dogshit, You'll have to do quite alot better than call me gay! I brought a sample of what I'm capable of to the table last week, at DuD, Your little hellbitches get the whole f'n deal! But I'll deal with that when the time comes. Now, On to the guy who that guy everyone else has beaten lost to.... [Adrian pulls a tape recorder out of his pocket and presses play] ("Y beat You") Jake, I didnt think you were right in the head BEFORE the chair shots, Now it's just painfully obvious. You think I'm underestimating you? I'm the king of being underestimated pal. I'm not underetimating you, you just havent shown me anything that makes me want to believe your hype..EVER. That's all you are Jake, Hype. And I've made a nice name for myself in killing hype. The self proclaimed "God of War" has been reduced to having a lawyer speak for him because he's too scared to show his fugly face in public anymore thanks to me. Zues went from believing he was a god to some loser running a production company thanks to the loss to moi. I kill hype for a living Jake, and your on deck. Hell, just look back to yesterday.... [Adrian holds up a picture from yesterday with jake missing a shot. there's three letters written on the bottom.] Adrian: J-O-B. Was it Irony Jake, or a look at the future. I think you know the answer there, I Know I do. *FADE- to a Picture of "Child Porn Monthly" with Jonnie V's face plastered on the front) Now we *FADE* for real... |
![]() |
|
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous) | |
![]() Our users say it best: "Zetaboards is the best forum service I have ever used." Learn More · Register for Free |
|
| « Previous Topic · Promos · Next Topic » |







1:38 AM Jul 11