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Please Read Carefully When Using This Forum; Its important for all board members.
Topic Started: Oct 24 2006, 01:35 PM (691 Views)
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We are pulling this up from the Debate section of the board with one or two slight changes. This is as a result of some board members failing to understand the policy we run about how to conduct a debate or discussion on the board.
Please read it carefully and ensure you understand what it means.
A debate - nothing wrong in a good debate.
However, at times you will find yourself at odds with another poster.

It might become personal to you and them - but please always try and avoid making it personal. In other words, don't attack someone, attack what they say.

Here are some guidelines:

Don't be rude to others, or make an argument personal.
Know the difference between a difference of opinion and a personal attack.
Don't try to "win" an argument by repeating yourself over and over.
Don't tell others what to post.
Keep it clean, don't use profanity.
If in any doubt, do NOT enter into a discussion that could lead to you getting a warning or banned.

Q Why can't I tell this poster what an idiot she/he is; every single thing she/he posts is just so wrong?
A If you can't find a respectful way to express your difference of opinion, then you're better off saying nothing at all. Don't talk down to other posters, lecture them or be rude and dismissive. Disagreement is fine, but attacking another poster personally will get you banned or warned. We mean it.

Q But she/he started the fight by attacking me! Can't I defend myself?
A No, you can't. This is a forum for the discussion not a dueling society. If you feel attacked, report it and then ignore. Remember, however much you were provoked, if you attack a poster personally then you are just as guilty of breaking the rules. And you, too, could be banned.

Q Okay, so how do I report someone for making a personal attack?
A You can PM or email us or any moderators we might have assigned to forums. They will then pass it onto us as Admin of the board. We will always try to respond in the quickest time possible.
Alternatively at the top of the box - See picture - you will see a !Report Button. Pressing that will report the post to Admin and we will investigate it!
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Q So, what is the difference between disagreeing and being attacked?
A Many of us feel passionately about identity, love and life in general. And sometimes if those opinions are disagreed with, you can feel personally attacked. But unless someone is insulting you by name, or quoting you directly and then disparaging *you* through what you say, it is not an attack, no matter how disagreeable being disagreed with may feel.

Remember, this Forum is a place to exchange; it is not your personal soapbox. The goal is to teach and to learn, not to beat down the opposition. This is supposed to be an enjoyable place to discuss, not a battlefield! If you find that you are arguing in circles, then agree to disagree and move along.

Q Why can't I tell a poster that she's/he's breaking the rules?
A This board has administrators, and it isn't you. Telling other people what to do is rude, derails the conversation even further and often ignites flame wars. Report the situation and it will be dealt with.

Q Who is allowed to discuss issues and who isn't?
A We don't run a policy that excludes anyone from discussing or debating on the board regardless of their position within it. All we expect is that all board members adhere to the rules we have set down and if they are doing that, it’s not going to be stopped by us.
We don't have any restrictions on who can post to ensure that partisans of any sort do not "take over" the debate or discussion. What we do expect is that if someone enters a discussion, (whatever their position) is acceptance to be warned if his or her actions are inappropriate. This means just because someone is a long standing board member or even a friend, they are not given any different rights or expectations than another board member. Nor are they restricted in anyway because of this.

Q What is a personal attack?
A While it is always taken on an individual basis, a personal attack qualifies in a manner similar to this:
It involves replying to an argument or assertion by attacking the person presenting the argument or assertion rather than the argument itself.
For example an attack could comprise of:
"You feel that drug use should be illegal, but I disagree, because you are uneducated and poor."

Q How can I avoid getting into a personal debate?
A When making comments we have to weigh up the level of risk between the extremity of the comment or gesture being made, and the possibility of it triggering a feeling of negativity in another board member. It's not something that calls for a total dissection of everything we post - it's pretty much common sense.
If you find that you are arguing in circles, then agree to disagree and move along. That is a way you can ensure it doesn't become personal.

Finally - We run the board. We don't always get it right, but we try. It doesn't mean that a decision to act or not act isn't done without discussions about how to proceed. Most of information about a situation is done privately away from the board. So just because you don't see any action being taken it doesn't mean it hasn't or isn't being taken.
And sometimes it will upset some members because a decision doesn't always go in their favour - but we have to make them. This means our decision (MJNet and myself) is final.
“In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.”
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