| The world's worst songs | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 11 2012, 03:50 AM (1,208 Views) | |
| Caro | Jan 11 2012, 03:50 AM Post #1 |
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For its summer time programme NZ's National Radio (the only station I listen to) has a 5-hour afternoon session when two presenters, well versed in music, play and talk about some of the more appalling songs ever recorded (often dreadful cover versions of perfectly adequate songs). http://www.radionz.co.nz/national/programmes/matineeidle One of the presenters says, 'Matinee Idle is Radio New Zealand's Mufti Day. They let me and Simon "loose in the asylum". We get to be the guys testing the outer limits of listener patience and we benignly abuse this privilege.' says O'Brien. 'They let us play whatever we want! It's every radio presenter's dream.' Today's included Loving her was Suicide by Ron McLeod and Lou's Got the Flu by Roger Miller. (Theme today 'Ron'; yesterday's was 'Teeth' and included Dentist! by Steve Martin, I'm Goin hire a wino to decorate our home, You're a pink toothbrush by Max Bygraves, and Sally's got a wooden leg by Sons of the West.) It's amazing that there are so many awful songs or ridiculous song titles out there. Cheers, Caro. |
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| AmosBurke | Jan 11 2012, 11:16 AM Post #2 |
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There is a well known LP "World's Worst Records" which contains such classics as "I Want My Baby Back" (an answer to "Leader Of The Pack") and "Boogie Woogie Amputee". Volume 2 contains "Teenage Enema Nurses in Bondage" by Killer Pussy, which I find strangely good! Adelaide radio station 5SSA-FM released an LP in the 1990's called "Jukebox from Hell" which included songs voted by their listeners as the worst of all time. Charlene's "I've Never Been To Me", which is regularly voted as the worst song of all time, was the opening track. This record didn't include anything by Florence Foster Jenkins, or Melba Montgomery's or J.J. Barrie's No Charge", which quite clearly is the worst song of all time. youtube links for delight and delectation : I Want My Baby Back Boogie Woogie Amputee Teenage Enema Nurses In Bondage I've Never Been To Me Florence Foster Jenkins sings The Bell Song from Lakme No Charge or No Charge |
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| rumbaba | Jan 11 2012, 12:08 PM Post #3 |
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I'll need to think about this for me, it would have to be something well known to be worth including e.g. 'I've never been to me', which is dire. I have a particular aversion to 'Torn between two lovers' by Mary McGregor, which was number one on both sides of the Atlanic. It contains the classic lines: 'He knows he can't possess me, he knows he never will there's just this empty space inside of me that only he can fill' (and they say size doesn't matter.) The line that really makes my blood boil though, is: 'You musn't think you've failed me just because there's someone else' . [Excuse me Missus, I think you're the one that's failed here ] It is also a dreadful dirge of a tune and a soulless, whiney vocal. Worst? Dunno, i'm thinking ..... Edited by rumbaba, Jan 11 2012, 12:08 PM.
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| chris crossing | Jan 11 2012, 12:37 PM Post #4 |
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No contest. Here's the winner live in concert (enjoy!): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XePepJvvcjY |
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| becky sharp | Jan 11 2012, 01:51 PM Post #5 |
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I find some titles of Country and Western songs funny...... Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like Having You Here My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly When You Leave Walk Out Backwards So I'll Think You're Walking In |
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| Caro | Jan 11 2012, 10:32 PM Post #6 |
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Radio NZ has also had a phone-in (well, I suppose an email-in) asking for the Heartbreak song for your and why. The ones they mentioned were Cannonball by Damien Price, Inarticulate Speech of the Heart - Van Morrison, Why Don't you Try - Cohen, Everybody Hurts - REM, It's My Party and I'll Cry if I want to - Lesley Gore, At this Moment - Billy Vera, Are You Lonesome Today - Elvis, and top slot went to I Fall to Pieces by Patsy Cline which they played. We don't get all that much country music on RNZ and I like it generally and I Fall to Pieces specifically very much, so that was nice. The five minute bit (excluding the song - I don't understand why copyright allows them to play a song, but not for us to hear it again.) is at 9.39 at http://www.radionz.co.nz/national/programmes/kiwisummer I love that Get your tongue outta my mouth title, Becky. What brain decided it would be a good choice for a song? One of my sons really liked I've Never Been to Me when he was about 17, so I have a soft spot for it. (I like the film Priscilla very much anyway.) The lyrics of Torn Between Two Lovers don't bother me, but it is very dirgy boring sort of music. |
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| rumbaba | Jan 11 2012, 10:41 PM Post #7 |
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I like Kinky Friedman's 'They ain't makin' jews like Jesus any more I also like the title 'It was hard as I kissed her goodbye' but I'm not sure if that's genuine or not ![]() Edited by rumbaba, Jan 11 2012, 10:43 PM.
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| becky sharp | Jan 12 2012, 02:46 PM Post #8 |
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That's my favourite,Caro...
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| Mobson | Jan 12 2012, 03:28 PM Post #9 |
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To all above How about..."Does your chewing gum lose its flavour on the Bed Post Overnight?" ~ Lonnie Donegan maybe not the song which is quite jolly, but the title..... Edited by Mobson, Jan 12 2012, 05:13 PM.
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| caissier | Jan 12 2012, 05:03 PM Post #10 |
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I hate In the Summertime by Mungo Gerry ..... for one; otherwise the gruesome No Charge, and in a similar style, Deck of Cards http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7Om7Wkwzv0 ....... but it is hard. I think horrible things get blanked out - a defence mechanism. (Excellent one there Chris ..... ) Edited by caissier, Jan 12 2012, 07:50 PM.
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| Norm Deplume | Jan 12 2012, 06:08 PM Post #11 |
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One of the most vomit forming songs of all time was "Honey" by Bobby Goldsboro http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59BZxgohr9g |
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| caissier | Jan 12 2012, 07:38 PM Post #12 |
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I think that was banned on Down Your Way, Norm ..... |
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| chris crossing | Jan 13 2012, 08:52 AM Post #13 |
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And, now that Christmas is over, can we please arrange for this crock of sh*te to be consigned to the bin: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9BZDpni56Y |
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| AmosBurke | Jan 13 2012, 09:10 AM Post #14 |
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There was a song in the 1920's called "They Needed a Songbird in Heaven (so God Took Caruso Away)", which has quite a catchy tune, but I can't comment on the lyrics as I've only heard a piano version. Still it's a great title! If you look at the Dr Demento site, there is shed load of strange titles. Here are just a few : The Eggplant That Ate Chicago - Dr. West's Medicine Show & Junk Band When Veronica Plays The Harmonica - Kay Kyser Bounce Your Boobies - Rusty Warren Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout Would Not Take The Garbage Out - Shel Silverstein The Chainsaw Juggler - The Four Postmen I would love to hear some of these; maybe I'll join his site and we don't get him on the wireless here in Blighty (AFAIK). Edited by AmosBurke, Jan 13 2012, 12:35 PM.
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| Norm Deplume | Jan 13 2012, 12:14 PM Post #15 |
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I think you are wrong mate, they still play it down this way from time to time
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| becky sharp | Jan 14 2012, 01:13 PM Post #16 |
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Ah but one person's crock of s***e,chris is usually/sometimes someone else's like ...I always enjoy hearing that at Christmastime... ....now if you'd said this onehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1cG-4YSyhQ I would have understood
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| becky sharp | Jan 14 2012, 02:29 PM Post #17 |
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How about this version courtesy of Spitting Images? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CZWI08FPqs |
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| waiting4atickle | Jan 15 2012, 09:56 PM Post #18 |
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I found that "Drop Kick Me Jesus Through The Goal Post of Life" number rather catchy. Here's something far worse:- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyjtKY-Chy8 |
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| Caro | Jan 15 2012, 10:48 PM Post #19 |
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Jesus seems to lend himself to these titles. I remember mentioning on the BBC boards one called something like What if Jesus Came to Your Place for Lunch? People though were less interested in the song than in the fact that I talked of playing music in our local library, which apparently is a shocking thing to do.
Edited by Caro, Jan 15 2012, 10:48 PM.
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| chris crossing | Jan 16 2012, 11:37 AM Post #20 |
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Nah - best stick with Ole Zim, tickle ![]() |
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| chris crossing | Jan 16 2012, 11:41 AM Post #21 |
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PS - I think all songs about lollipops are a bit suspect, aren't they? Especially this one - My Boy('s) Lollipop: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCUcbRTB6Rs A pity the ighting failed at the beginning |
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| becky sharp | Jan 16 2012, 08:54 PM Post #22 |
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If we can put songs in that we personally think are the world's worst I will nominate Torn by Natalie Imbruglia....
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8:50 AM Jul 11