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| Tweet Topic Started: Sep 18 2012, 09:07 AM (34,831 Views) | |
| caissier | Sep 18 2012, 09:07 AM Post #1 |
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waiting4atickle Yesterday, 10:44 PM IP: 86.28.198.150 ยท Post #3467 Posts:6,484Group:MembersMember#12Joined:Jul 11, 2011 There was an old hero called Ajax who certainly lived life to the max His fighting was mythic His muscles terrythic From the years he'd spent building haystacks. Now they're gunning for poor old Brock Edited by caissier, Sep 18 2012, 09:08 AM.
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| Mobson | Jun 1 2014, 07:36 AM Post #1901 |
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To be honest he was an odd chap A man who was always in a flap From morning 'til night |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 2 2014, 11:29 AM Post #1902 |
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To be honest he was an odd chap A man who was always in a flap From morning 'til night Always looking for a fight |
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| Mobson | Jun 2 2014, 11:52 AM Post #1903 |
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To be honest he was an odd chap A man who was always in a flap From morning 'til night Always looking for a fight Someone needs to give him a slap! |
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| Mobson | Jun 2 2014, 11:53 AM Post #1904 |
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The King of Clay is playing today |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 2 2014, 10:13 PM Post #1905 |
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The King of Clay is playing today Can anyone take his title away? |
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| Mobson | Jun 3 2014, 11:27 AM Post #1906 |
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The King of Clay is playing today Can anyone take his title away? Maybe Djoko can |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 3 2014, 04:35 PM Post #1907 |
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The King of Clay is playing today Can anyone take his title away? Maybe Djoko can He could be just the man |
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| Mobson | Jun 4 2014, 08:27 AM Post #1908 |
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The King of Clay is playing today Can anyone take his title away? Maybe Djoko can He could be just the man Or it could that dour Scot, Murray |
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| Mobson | Jun 4 2014, 08:28 AM Post #1909 |
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Today Murray plays with Monfils |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 4 2014, 01:14 PM Post #1910 |
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Today Murray plays with Monfils Are you sure? It doesn't seem real |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 5 2014, 10:03 AM Post #1911 |
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Today Murray plays with Monfils Are you sure? It doesn't seem real My son only plays darts |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 5 2014, 10:53 AM Post #1912 |
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Today Murray plays with Monfils Are you sure? It doesn't seem real My son only plays darts With doctors from St Bart's |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 5 2014, 11:45 AM Post #1913 |
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Today Murray plays with Monfils Are you sure? It doesn't seem real My son only plays darts With doctors from St Bart's And only when he travels to Nice Ladies who make noises when playing |
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| Mobson | Jun 5 2014, 11:59 AM Post #1914 |
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Ladies who make noises when playing Remind me of young fillies a'braying I saw Stephie Graff play on Wimbledon's centre court a few times during her tennis career and with her long blond pony tail flying through the air when she bent her head to serve she always reminded me of a splendid young filly....
Edited by Mobson, Jun 5 2014, 12:03 PM.
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 5 2014, 12:17 PM Post #1915 |
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Ladies who make noises when playing Remind me of young fillies a'braying But what makes me sigh |
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| rumbaba | Jun 5 2014, 12:21 PM Post #1916 |
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Ladies who make noises when playing Remind me of young fillies a'braying But what makes me sigh is a lass with a pie |
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| Mobson | Jun 5 2014, 12:23 PM Post #1917 |
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RUM!!!!
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| rumbaba | Jun 5 2014, 12:30 PM Post #1918 |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 5 2014, 12:42 PM Post #1919 |
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Ladies who make noises when playing Remind me of young fillies a'braying But what makes me sigh is a lass with a pie And a laugh that's like horses a'neighing It's a shame, that she felt how she did |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 5 2014, 12:49 PM Post #1920 |
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It's a shame, that she felt how she did When she suddenly lifted the lid Edited by dai Cottomy, Jun 5 2014, 12:55 PM.
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 5 2014, 12:56 PM Post #1921 |
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It's a shame, that she felt how she did When she suddenly lifted the lid The surprise on her face Edited by Norm Deplume, Jun 5 2014, 01:00 PM.
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 5 2014, 08:43 PM Post #1922 |
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It's a shame, that she felt how she did When she suddenly lifted the lid The surprise on her face was a sort of grimace |
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| Mobson | Jun 5 2014, 09:04 PM Post #1923 |
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It's a shame, that she felt how she did When she suddenly lifted the lid The surprise on her face was a sort of grimace Staring back at her was a live squid Edited by Mobson, Jun 5 2014, 09:05 PM.
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| Mobson | Jun 5 2014, 09:11 PM Post #1924 |
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Will I think of a line in time |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 5 2014, 09:24 PM Post #1925 |
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Will I think of a line in time You can always act out a mime |
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| Mobson | Jun 6 2014, 10:08 AM Post #1926 |
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Will I think of a line in time You can always act out a mime But no-one will see it |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 6 2014, 05:12 PM Post #1927 |
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Will I think of a line in time You can always act out a mime But no-one will see it Ah well! and So-be-it |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 6 2014, 07:04 PM Post #1928 |
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Will I think of a line in time You can always act out a mime But no-one will see it Ah well! and So-be-it So make mine a lager and lime George Washington never told lies |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 7 2014, 12:57 AM Post #1929 |
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George Washington never told lies, Knowing Truth is the perfect disguise |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 7 2014, 10:20 AM Post #1930 |
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George Washington never told lies, Knowing Truth is the perfect disguise When he chopped down a tree |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 7 2014, 10:33 AM Post #1931 |
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George Washington never told lies, Knowing Truth is the perfect disguise When he chopped down a tree He said "Yes, it was me" |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 7 2014, 11:21 AM Post #1932 |
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George Washington never told lies, Knowing Truth is the perfect disguise When he chopped down a tree He said "Yes, it was me" And his Daddy said, "What a Surprise"! I just can't think of a good first line |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 7 2014, 11:53 AM Post #1933 |
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That was a good last line, Norm I just can't think of a good first line When I ask a young lady to dine |
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| Mobson | Jun 7 2014, 12:05 PM Post #1934 |
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I just can't think of a good first line When I ask a young lady to dine Afraid of rejection |
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| tafkaj | Jun 7 2014, 12:35 PM Post #1935 |
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I just can't think of a good first line When I ask a young lady to dine; Afraid of rejection, I get an erection |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 7 2014, 12:43 PM Post #1936 |
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Mobs leading you on again, Taf? |
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| tafkaj | Jun 7 2014, 12:45 PM Post #1937 |
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By the nose ... (And other parts of my anatomy.) |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 7 2014, 03:02 PM Post #1938 |
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I just can't think of a good first line When I ask a young lady to dine; Afraid of rejection, I get an erection And make her an offer she can't decline Is there no end to this stream of dross? |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 7 2014, 04:29 PM Post #1939 |
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Is there no end to this stream of dross? Does nobody out there give a toss? |
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| Mobson | Jun 8 2014, 07:51 AM Post #1940 |
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Always!!!!!!
Edited by Mobson, Jun 8 2014, 07:51 AM.
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| Mobson | Jun 8 2014, 07:52 AM Post #1941 |
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Is there no end to this stream of dross? Does nobody out there give a toss? Apparently not! |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 8 2014, 08:54 AM Post #1942 |
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Is there no end to this stream of dross? Does nobody out there give a toss? Apparently not! Don't give a jot! |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 8 2014, 01:55 PM Post #1943 |
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Is there no end to this stream of dross? Does nobody out there give a toss? Apparently not! Don't give a jot! We'll jolly well show them who's boss. Identical twins from Calcutta |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 8 2014, 03:49 PM Post #1944 |
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Identical twins from Calcutta Couldn't tell Stork from Butter |
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| Mobson | Jun 8 2014, 06:19 PM Post #1945 |
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Identical twins from Calcutta Couldn't tell Stork from Butter Their two twin racoons |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 9 2014, 08:46 PM Post #1946 |
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Identical twins from Calcutta Couldn't tell Stork from Butter Their two twin racoons Gave a tune on the spoons |
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| Mobson | Jun 10 2014, 09:10 AM Post #1947 |
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Identical twins from Calcutta Couldn't tell Stork from Butter Their two twin racoons Gave a tune on the spoons As they were all sat in the gutter Edited by Mobson, Jun 10 2014, 09:10 AM.
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| Mobson | Jun 10 2014, 09:11 AM Post #1948 |
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Our schools must 'promote British values' |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 10 2014, 07:44 PM Post #1949 |
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Our schools must 'promote British values' Of the kind that your closest pal use |
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| Mobson | Jun 11 2014, 09:54 AM Post #1950 |
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Our schools must 'promote British values' Of the kind that your closest pal use How to implement this coda? |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 11 2014, 12:36 PM Post #1951 |
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Our schools must 'promote British values' Of the kind that your closest pal use How to implement this coda? Have a whisky and soda! |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 13 2014, 03:29 PM Post #1952 |
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Our schools must 'promote British values' Of the kind that your closest pal use How to implement this coda? Have a whisky and soda! After all, what have you got to lose? The British, it's said, like to play fair Edited by dai Cottomy, Jun 13 2014, 04:10 PM.
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| tafkaj | Jun 14 2014, 12:24 PM Post #1953 |
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"The British, it's said, like to play fair," Said the wolf to the Kodiak bear |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 14 2014, 03:01 PM Post #1954 |
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"The British, it's said, like to play fair," Said the wolf to the Kodiak bear The bear said to the wolf, |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 14 2014, 09:43 PM Post #1955 |
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"The British, it's said, like to play fair," Said the wolf to the Kodiak bear The bear said to the wolf, "I was there, at the Gulf" |
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| Mobson | Jun 15 2014, 08:24 PM Post #1956 |
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"The British, it's said, like to play fair," Said the wolf to the Kodiak bear The bear said to the wolf, "I was there, at the Gulf" The wolf said "d'yer think that I care". Edited by Mobson, Jun 15 2014, 08:24 PM.
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| Mobson | Jun 15 2014, 08:37 PM Post #1957 |
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When Old Ned got addicted to gin
Edited by Mobson, Jun 15 2014, 08:39 PM.
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 16 2014, 09:17 AM Post #1958 |
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When Old Ned got addicted to gin He went round with a vacuous grin |
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| tafkaj | Jun 16 2014, 11:29 AM Post #1959 |
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When Old Ned got addicted to gin He went round with a vacuous grin, Just like Gordon Brown |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 16 2014, 12:16 PM Post #1960 |
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When Old Ned got addicted to gin He went round with a vacuous grin, Just like Gordon Brown In a dressing gown |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 17 2014, 11:39 AM Post #1961 |
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When Old Ned got addicted to gin He went round with a vacuous grin, Just like Gordon Brown In a dressing gown He ended up dumped in a bin. A bin is a box for all things |
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| tafkaj | Jun 17 2014, 02:18 PM Post #1962 |
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A bin is a box for all things, Such as solder and buffalo wings
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 17 2014, 02:21 PM Post #1963 |
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A bin is a box for all things, Such as solder and buffalo wings odd screws and obscure bits |
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| tafkaj | Jun 17 2014, 02:28 PM Post #1964 |
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A bin is a box for all things, Such as solder and buffalo wings, ![]() Odd screws and obscure bits Of irons and old Airfix kits |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 17 2014, 04:03 PM Post #1965 |
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A bin is a box for all things, Such as solder and buffalo wings, ![]() Odd screws and obscure bits Of irons and old Airfix kits And a toy canary that sings The Mayor of Wells-Next-The-Sea |
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| Mobson | Jun 19 2014, 02:46 PM Post #1966 |
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The Mayor of Wells-Next-The-Sea Got stung by a very large bee |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 19 2014, 04:25 PM Post #1967 |
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The Mayor of Wells-Next-The-Sea Got stung by a very large bee He let out a yell |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 21 2014, 01:04 PM Post #1968 |
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The Mayor of Wells-Next-The-Sea Got stung by a very large bee He let out a yell Then stumbled and fell |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 21 2014, 01:14 PM Post #1969 |
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The Mayor of Wells-Next-The-Sea Got stung by a very large bee He let out a yell Then stumbled and fell Then soothed it by applying cold tea A plasterer from sunny Penzance |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 21 2014, 03:00 PM Post #1970 |
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A plasterer from sunny Penzance Got plastered on a ferry to France |
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| Mobson | Jun 21 2014, 05:52 PM Post #1971 |
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A plasterer from sunny Penzance Got plastered on a ferry to France He overshot the jetty |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 21 2014, 07:08 PM Post #1972 |
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A plasterer from sunny Penzance Got plastered on a ferry to France He overshot the jetty While waving a machete |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 22 2014, 09:10 AM Post #1973 |
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A plasterer from sunny Penzance Got plastered on a ferry to France He overshot the jetty While waving a machete And doing the tarantella dance On a trip to San Marco in Venice |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 22 2014, 09:43 AM Post #1974 |
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On a trip to San Marco in Venice I encountered a plumber called Dennis |
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| Mobson | Jun 22 2014, 12:22 PM Post #1975 |
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blimey! all these tradesmen going to exotic locations On a trip to San Marco in Venice I encountered a plumber called Dennis He said Venice is sinking |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 22 2014, 04:40 PM Post #1976 |
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On a trip to San Marco in Venice I encountered a plumber called Dennis He said "Venice is sinking" And then without blinking |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 23 2014, 09:12 AM Post #1977 |
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On a trip to San Marco in Venice I encountered a plumber called Dennis He said "Venice is sinking" And then without blinking Said, "lets go to Wimbledon for the tennis" The price of the strawberries was high |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 23 2014, 09:18 AM Post #1978 |
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On a trip to San Marco in Venice I encountered a plumber called Dennis He said "Venice is sinking" And then without blinking Went off for a game of tennis Wimbledon is almost upon us |
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| Mobson | Jun 23 2014, 09:41 AM Post #1979 |
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Wimbledon is almost upon us We Brits make a terrible fuss |
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| tafkaj | Jun 23 2014, 11:36 AM Post #1980 |
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Wimbledon is almost upon us We Brits make a terrible fuss 'Bout Andy and Tim |
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| Mobson | Jun 23 2014, 01:14 PM Post #1981 |
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Wimbledon is almost upon us We Brits make a terrible fuss 'Bout Andy and Tim More Andy than him |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 23 2014, 11:41 PM Post #1982 |
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Wimbledon is almost upon us We Brits make a terrible fuss 'Bout Andy and Tim More Andy than him But it's Naomi the papers discuss. A young racketeer from west Cheadle |
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| Mobson | Jun 24 2014, 09:37 AM Post #1983 |
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A young racketeer from west Cheadle Distantly related to Jeremy Beadle |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 24 2014, 02:54 PM Post #1984 |
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A young racketeer from west Cheadle Distantly related to Jeremy Beadle Sold me a duff Rolex |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 24 2014, 06:42 PM Post #1985 |
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A young racketeer from west Cheadle Distantly related to Jeremy Beadle Sold me a duff Rolex and some rough Durex |
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| Mobson | Jun 25 2014, 12:39 AM Post #1986 |
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A young racketeer from west Cheadle Distantly related to Jeremy Beadle Sold me a duff Rolex and some rough Durex Which really gave me 'the needle'. ********************************* To avoid giving strangers advice Edited by Mobson, Jun 25 2014, 12:40 AM.
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 25 2014, 11:29 AM Post #1987 |
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To avoid giving strangers advice I tried to talk short and precise |
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| Mobson | Jun 26 2014, 08:27 AM Post #1988 |
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To avoid giving strangers advice I tried to talk short and precise But being Somali |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 26 2014, 12:24 PM Post #1989 |
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To avoid giving strangers advice I tried to talk short and precise But being Somali And a right Charlie |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 26 2014, 01:38 PM Post #1990 |
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To avoid giving strangers advice I tried to talk short and precise But being Somali And a right Charlie I found nothing that would quite suffice In the south of Tierra del Fuego |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 27 2014, 09:47 AM Post #1991 |
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In the south of Tierra del Fuego Lives a chap who is known as 'El Dago' |
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| tafkaj | Jun 28 2014, 12:35 PM Post #1992 |
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[Good grief, Norm - keep your head down, mate!] In the south of Tierra del Fuego Lives a chap who is known as 'El Dago' He doesn't mind the cold |
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 28 2014, 04:43 PM Post #1993 |
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In the south of Tierra del Fuego Lives a chap who is known as 'El Dago' He doesn't mind the cold But he's not quite so bold |
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| Mobson | Jun 29 2014, 09:07 AM Post #1994 |
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In the south of Tierra del Fuego Lives a chap who is known as 'El Dago' He doesn't mind the cold But he's not quite so bold When moulding his wonga like Play-doh Edited by Mobson, Jun 29 2014, 09:07 AM.
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| Mobson | Jun 29 2014, 09:08 AM Post #1995 |
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In the mountains of old Catalonia |
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| Mobson | Jun 29 2014, 09:09 AM Post #1996 |
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In the mountains of old Catalonia
Edited by Mobson, Jun 29 2014, 09:28 AM.
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| Norm Deplume | Jun 29 2014, 09:15 AM Post #1997 |
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In the mountains of old Catalonia There are acres of yellow mahonia |
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| Norm Deplume | Jul 1 2014, 12:52 PM Post #1998 |
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In the mountains of old Catalonia There are acres of yellow mahonia While down at the beach |
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| Norm Deplume | Jul 5 2014, 09:32 AM Post #1999 |
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In the mountains of old Catalonia There are acres of yellow mahonia While down at the beach Just close enough to reach |
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| dai Cottomy | Jul 5 2014, 06:06 PM Post #2000 |
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In the mountains of old Catalonia There are acres of yellow mahonia While down at the beach Just close enough to reach Is a dead shark that smells of ammonia I have a very sensitive nose |
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I saw Stephie Graff play on Wimbledon's centre court a few times during her tennis career and with her long blond pony tail flying through the air when she bent her head to serve she always reminded me of a splendid young filly....
blimey! all these tradesmen going to exotic locations 
7:07 AM Jul 13