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| Tweet Topic Started: Sep 18 2012, 12:55 PM (26,602 Views) | |
| dai Cottomy | Sep 18 2012, 12:55 PM Post #1 |
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waiting4atickle Yesterday, 1:36 PM Post #2792 It's awful, the lies that we tell And maybe we'll all go to Hell So always tell the Truth |
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| Mobson | Aug 28 2017, 04:52 AM Post #2401 |
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There was a young boy, name of Jack ---------------------------------- ----------------------- ----------------------- Then he became a newspaper hack Edited by Mobson, Aug 28 2017, 04:53 AM.
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| Douglas | Aug 29 2017, 06:21 PM Post #2402 |
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There was a young boy, name of Jack Whose mother was taken aback ----------------------- ----------------------- Then he became a newspaper hack |
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| dai Cottomy | Aug 30 2017, 01:52 PM Post #2403 |
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There was a young boy, name of Jack Whose mother was taken aback When he said "I'm gay" ----------------------- Then he became a newspaper hack |
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| Mobson | Aug 31 2017, 10:34 AM Post #2404 |
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There was a young boy, name of Jack Whose mother was taken aback When he said "I'm gay" Left home right away Then he became a newspaper hack Edited by Mobson, Aug 31 2017, 10:37 AM.
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| Mobson | Aug 31 2017, 10:38 AM Post #2405 |
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It feels like the last day of Summer |
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| Douglas | Aug 31 2017, 10:48 AM Post #2406 |
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It feels like the last day of Summer --------------------------------------- --------------------------- --------------------------- I'll have to send for a plumber |
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| dai Cottomy | Aug 31 2017, 02:34 PM Post #2407 |
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It feels like the last day of Summer In Texas it's been a real bummer --------------------------- --------------------------- I'll have to send for a plumber |
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| Mobson | Sep 3 2017, 05:32 AM Post #2408 |
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It feels like the last day of Summer In Texas it's been a real bummer All the water pipes burst --------------------------- I'll have to send for a plumber Edited by Mobson, Sep 3 2017, 05:33 AM.
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| Douglas | Sep 6 2017, 12:25 PM Post #2409 |
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It feels like the last day of Summer In Texas it's been a real bummer All the water pipes burst But that is my worst I'll have to send for a plumber. Have I landed in a parallel world ? Nobody else seems to have posted for some days. It seems that there's nobody here -------------------------------------- ------------------------------ ------------------------------ -------------------------------------- Edited by Douglas, Sep 6 2017, 05:15 PM.
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| dai Cottomy | Sep 10 2017, 01:16 AM Post #2410 |
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It seems that there's nobody here They're all out having a beer ------------------------------ ------------------------------ -------------------------------------- |
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| waiting4atickle | Sep 15 2017, 11:35 PM Post #2411 |
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It seems that there's nobody here They're all out having a beer ------------------------------ ------------------------------ They'll be back when the coast is clear. |
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| Douglas | Sep 16 2017, 12:26 AM Post #2412 |
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It seems that there's nobody here They're all out having a beer They're all lying low ------------------------------ They'll be back when the coast is clear. |
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| dai Cottomy | Sep 16 2017, 11:33 AM Post #2413 |
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It seems that there's nobody here They're all out having a beer They're all lying low In a peaceful grotto They'll be back when the coast is clear. |
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| dai Cottomy | Sep 16 2017, 11:42 AM Post #2414 |
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A gentleman farmer from Fife |
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| Douglas | Sep 17 2017, 12:09 AM Post #2415 |
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A gentleman farmer from Fife Had a very fastidious wife ----------------- ----------------- --------------------------------- |
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| dai Cottomy | Sep 20 2017, 12:16 PM Post #2416 |
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A gentleman farmer from Fife Had a very fastidious wife ----------------- She told him he smelt --------------------------------- Edited by dai Cottomy, Sep 20 2017, 12:22 PM.
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| Douglas | Sep 20 2017, 02:42 PM Post #2417 |
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A gentleman farmer from Fife Had a very fastidious wife. When he undid his belt She told him he smelt --------------------------------- |
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| dai Cottomy | Sep 23 2017, 01:36 PM Post #2418 |
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A gentleman farmer from Fife Had a very fastidious wife. When he undid his belt She told him he smelt Which led to a period of strife |
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| dai Cottomy | Sep 23 2017, 01:39 PM Post #2419 |
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There once was a burglar called Sam |
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| Douglas | Sep 24 2017, 12:26 AM Post #2420 |
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There once was a burglar called Sam ----------------------------------------- --------------------------------- --------------------------------- He answered "I don't give a damn". |
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| dai Cottomy | Sep 28 2017, 11:31 AM Post #2421 |
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There once was a burglar called Sam Who was partial to platefuls of Spam --------------------------------- --------------------------------- He answered "I don't give a damn". |
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| Caro | Sep 30 2017, 10:24 PM Post #2422 |
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here once was a burglar called Sam Who was partial to platefuls of Spam --------------------------------- When told that was bad He answered "I don't give a damn". |
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| Mobson | Oct 4 2017, 03:19 PM Post #2423 |
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There once was a burglar called Sam Who was partial to platefuls of Spam 'Cos it made him less sad When told that was bad He answered "I don't give a damn". Edited by Mobson, Oct 4 2017, 03:20 PM.
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| Mobson | Oct 4 2017, 03:26 PM Post #2424 |
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It's political party conference time |
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| dai Cottomy | Oct 5 2017, 09:14 PM Post #2425 |
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It's political party conference time The anapæst meter's less than sublime |
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| Douglas | Oct 6 2017, 12:12 AM Post #2426 |
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It's political party conference time The anapæst meter's less than sublime ----------------------------------- ----------------------------------- At least we can end with a rhyme. |
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| Mobson | Oct 6 2017, 02:31 AM Post #2427 |
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It's political party conference time The anapæst meter's less than sublime T'was ever thus What's all the fuss At least we can end with a rhyme. To complete this, I couldn't resist Edited by Mobson, Oct 6 2017, 02:33 AM.
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| dai Cottomy | Oct 6 2017, 03:19 PM Post #2428 |
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To complete this, I couldn't resist 'Twas a prospect not to be missed |
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| Douglas | Oct 6 2017, 05:06 PM Post #2429 |
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To complete this, I couldn't resist 'Twas a prospect not to be missed ----------------------------- ----------------------------- Though everyone's shouting "Desist!" |
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| Mobson | Oct 14 2017, 04:30 AM Post #2430 |
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To complete this, I couldn't resist 'Twas a prospect not to be missed I must have my say ----------------------------- Though everyone's shouting "Desist!" |
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| dai Cottomy | Oct 14 2017, 09:47 AM Post #2431 |
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To complete this, I couldn't resist 'Twas a prospect not to be missed I must have my say I suppose that's O.K Though everyone's shouting "Desist!" |
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| dai Cottomy | Oct 14 2017, 09:50 AM Post #2432 |
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I once had a donkey named Roger |
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| Douglas | Oct 14 2017, 10:58 AM Post #2433 |
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I once had a donkey named Roger -------------------------------------- ------------------------- ------------------------- So I sold him off to the lodger. |
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| Mobson | Oct 17 2017, 11:18 AM Post #2434 |
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I once had a donkey named Roger As devious as an artful dodger ------------------------- ------------------------- So I sold him off to the lodger. |
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| Douglas | Oct 17 2017, 11:37 AM Post #2435 |
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I once had a donkey named Roger As devious as an artful dodger He wouldn't heed a word of mine ------------------------- So I sold him off to the lodger. |
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| Mobson | Oct 28 2017, 11:15 AM Post #2436 |
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I once had a donkey named Roger As devious as an artful dodger He wouldn't heed a word of mine Then he began to pine So I sold him off to the lodger. Edited by Mobson, Oct 28 2017, 11:15 AM.
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| Mobson | Oct 28 2017, 11:16 AM Post #2437 |
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Remember, remember, the 5th of November |
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| Douglas | Oct 28 2017, 11:33 AM Post #2438 |
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Remember, remember, the 5th of November ------------------------------------------------ ---------------------------------- ---------------------------------- He was hit on the head by an ember. |
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| dai Cottomy | Oct 28 2017, 11:48 AM Post #2439 |
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Remember, remember, the 5th of November More fun than that stuff in December ---------------------------------- ---------------------------------- He was hit on the head by an ember. |
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| waiting4atickle | Nov 2 2017, 01:59 AM Post #2440 |
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Remember, remember, the 5th of November More fun than that stuff in December It goes with a bang ---------------------------------- He was hit on the head by an ember. |
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| dai Cottomy | Nov 2 2017, 11:02 AM Post #2441 |
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Remember, remember, the 5th of November More fun than that stuff in December It goes with a bang Guy Fawkes didn't hang He was hit on the head by an ember. Edited by dai Cottomy, Nov 2 2017, 11:03 AM.
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| dai Cottomy | Nov 2 2017, 12:33 PM Post #2442 |
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In winter the days get much shorter |
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| dai Cottomy | Nov 7 2017, 12:22 PM Post #2443 |
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In winter the days get much shorter I eat much more than I oughta ------------------------------ ------------------------------ ---------------------------------------- Edited by dai Cottomy, Nov 7 2017, 12:24 PM.
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| waiting4atickle | Nov 9 2017, 12:26 PM Post #2444 |
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In winter the days get much shorter I eat much more than I oughta ------------------------------ ------------------------------ Just wait and see what Santa's brought ya. |
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| dai Cottomy | Nov 17 2017, 02:24 AM Post #2445 |
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In winter the days get much shorter I eat much more than I oughta ------------------------------ Beneath the mistletoe Just wait and see what Santa's brought ya. |
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| Mobson | Nov 28 2017, 12:43 PM Post #2446 |
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In winter the days get much shorter I eat much more than I oughta Having a jolly Ho-Ho Beneath the mistletoe Just wait and see what Santa's brought ya |
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| Mobson | Nov 28 2017, 12:43 PM Post #2447 |
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When Harry proposed marriage to Meghan |
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| Caro | Dec 4 2017, 03:45 AM Post #2448 |
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When Harry proposed marriage to Meghan --------------------------------------- She said "Yes please sir" ------------------------ --------------------------------------- |
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| Mobson | Dec 4 2017, 02:37 PM Post #2449 |
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When Harry proposed marriage to Meghan --------------------------------------- She said "Yes please sir" And made his heart stir --------------------------------------- Edited by Mobson, Dec 4 2017, 02:38 PM.
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| waiting4atickle | Dec 5 2017, 12:20 AM Post #2450 |
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When Harry proposed marriage to Meghan In a cottage somewhere in Devon She said "Yes please sir" And made his heart stir --------------------------------------- |
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| Mobson | Dec 7 2017, 07:17 PM Post #2451 |
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When Harry proposed marriage to Meghan In a cottage somewhere in Devon She said "Yes please sir" And made his heart stir And sent his soul straight to heaven |
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| Mobson | Dec 7 2017, 07:25 PM Post #2452 |
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........................................... Her mind felt like a tea strainer ............. ............. ............................................ |
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| waiting4atickle | Dec 8 2017, 05:42 AM Post #2453 |
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........................................... Her mind felt like a tea strainer ............. ............. But it really was a no-brainer. |
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| Douglas | Dec 8 2017, 11:57 AM Post #2454 |
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When she went to a lifestyle trainer Her mind felt like a tea strainer ............. ............. But it really was a no-brainer. |
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| dai Cottomy | Dec 8 2017, 03:02 PM Post #2455 |
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When she went to a lifestyle trainer Her mind felt like a tea strainer She fell for his pecs ----------------------- But it really was a no-brainer. |
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| dai Cottomy | Dec 29 2017, 02:45 PM Post #2456 |
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When she went to a lifestyle trainer Her mind felt like a tea strainer She fell for his pecs As well as his specs But it really was a no-brainer. A comely young wench name of Hannah |
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| dai Cottomy | Jan 8 2018, 08:58 PM Post #2457 |
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A comely young wench name of Hannah had an unfortunate manner |
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| waiting4atickle | Jan 9 2018, 01:58 AM Post #2458 |
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A comely young wench name of Hannah Who had an unfortunate manner --------------- --------------- With a tune on the ol' joanna. |
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| dai Cottomy | Jan 15 2018, 12:25 PM Post #2459 |
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A comely young wench name of Hannah Who had an unfortunate manner Her withering glance --------------- With a tune on the ol' joanna. |
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| Caro | Jan 24 2018, 03:59 AM Post #2460 |
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A comely young wench name of Hannah Who had an unfortunate manner Her withering glance Put men in a trance With a tune on the ol' joanna. ----------------------------------- ----------------------------------- I loved it to bits -------------------- ----------------------------------- |
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| dai Cottomy | Jan 24 2018, 11:20 AM Post #2461 |
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I once had a tortoise called Speedy ----------------------------------- I loved it to bits -------------------- ----------------------------------- |
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| waiting4atickle | Jan 24 2018, 11:49 AM Post #2462 |
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I once had a tortoise called Speedy As pets go, it wan't too needy I loved it to bits -------------------- ----------------------------------- |
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| Mobson | Jan 24 2018, 12:19 PM Post #2463 |
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I once had a tortoise called Speedy As pets go, it wan't too needy I loved it to bits -------------------- By its nature of being so greedy |
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| dai Cottomy | Jan 30 2018, 10:57 AM Post #2464 |
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I once had a tortoise called Speedy As pets go, it wan't too needy I loved it to bits It was subject to fits By its nature of being so greedy A debt collector named Screwell |
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| dai Cottomy | Jan 30 2018, 11:00 AM Post #2465 |
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A debt collector named Screwell ------------------------------------ ------------------------- ------------------------- ------------------------------------ |
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| Mobson | Jan 30 2018, 04:37 PM Post #2466 |
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A debt collector named Screwell Only called on people he knew well ------------------------- ------------------------- ------------------------------------ |
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| dai Cottomy | Jan 30 2018, 05:37 PM Post #2467 |
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A debt collector named Screwell Only called on people he knew well ------------------------- ------------------------- She said::"ooh! you're awfullu cruel" Edited by dai Cottomy, Jan 30 2018, 05:38 PM.
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| dai Cottomy | Jan 31 2018, 10:54 AM Post #2468 |
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A debt collector named Screwell Only called on people he knew well Like Ma Potts, old and bent ------------------------- She said::"ooh! you're awfullu cruel" |
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| Mobson | Jan 31 2018, 02:11 PM Post #2469 |
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A debt collector named Screwell Only called on people he knew well Like Ma Potts, old and bent With her fortune all spent She said::"ooh! you're awfullu cruel" |
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| Mobson | Jan 31 2018, 02:13 PM Post #2470 |
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Nice one! Screwell must die said Ma Potts |
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| dai Cottomy | Feb 1 2018, 02:01 AM Post #2471 |
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Screwell must die said Ma Potts "Agreed" we all said and drew lots ----------------------- ----------------------- -------------------------------------- Edited by dai Cottomy, Feb 1 2018, 02:04 AM.
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| Douglas | Feb 1 2018, 12:19 PM Post #2472 |
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Screwell must die said Ma Potts "Agreed" we all said and drew lots ----------------------- ----------------------- But it was Screwell who called the shots. |
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| waiting4atickle | Feb 1 2018, 10:14 PM Post #2473 |
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Screwell must die said Ma Potts "Agreed" we all said and drew lots For the chance to spill blood ----------------------- But it was Screwell who called the shots. |
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| dai Cottomy | Feb 9 2018, 01:43 AM Post #2474 |
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Screwell must die said Ma Potts "Agreed" we all said and drew lots For the chance to spill blood All over the mud But it was Screwell who called the shots. |
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| dai Cottomy | Feb 9 2018, 01:49 AM Post #2475 |
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A handsome young chap from Nuneaton ----------------------------------------- ----------------------------- ----------------------------- ----------------------------------------- |
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| Mobson | Feb 12 2018, 06:47 PM Post #2476 |
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A handsome young chap from Nuneaton ----------------------------------------- ----------------------------- ----------------------------- Before he realised he was indubitably beaten |
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| dai Cottomy | Feb 23 2018, 03:06 PM Post #2477 |
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A handsome young chap from Nuneaton Was expelled for arson from Eton ----------------------------- ----------------------------- Before he realised he was indubitably beaten |
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| Mobson | Feb 23 2018, 06:09 PM Post #2478 |
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A handsome young chap from Nuneaton Was expelled for arson from Eton He denied culpability ----------------------------- Before he realised he was indubitably beaten |
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| dai Cottomy | Feb 24 2018, 03:26 AM Post #2479 |
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A handsome young chap from Nuneaton Was expelled for arson from Eton He denied culpability despite probability Before he realised he was indubitably beaten |
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| dai Cottomy | Feb 24 2018, 03:27 AM Post #2480 |
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A jolly old fellow from Rhyl ------------------------------ ---------------------- ---------------------- ------------------------------ Edited by dai Cottomy, Feb 25 2018, 04:35 PM.
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| Mobson | Feb 26 2018, 02:00 PM Post #2481 |
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A jolly old fellow from Rhyl ------------------------------ ---------------------- ---------------------- Living in Cardiff with Phil |
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| dai Cottomy | Feb 26 2018, 04:44 PM Post #2482 |
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A jolly old fellow from Rhyl Was hooked on the little blue pill ---------------------- ---------------------- Living in Cardiff with Phil |
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| Mobson | Feb 27 2018, 12:26 AM Post #2483 |
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A jolly old fellow from Rhyl Was hooked on the little blue pill Not finding a wife ---------------------- Living in Cardiff with Phil |
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| waiting4atickle | Feb 27 2018, 03:57 AM Post #2484 |
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A jolly old fellow from Rhyl Was hooked on the little blue pill Not finding a wife He spent most of his life Living in Cardiff with Phi (Good set up, Mobs.) A bonny wee lass from Dundee ---------------------------- -------------------- -------------------- ---------------------------- |
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| Mobson | Feb 27 2018, 04:49 AM Post #2485 |
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Thanks Ticks A bonny wee lass from Dundee ---------------------------- -------------------- -------------------- On a massive spending spree Edited by Mobson, Feb 27 2018, 04:50 AM.
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| Douglas | Feb 27 2018, 01:22 PM Post #2486 |
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A bonny wee lass from Dundee Was researching her family tree -------------------- -------------------- On a massive spending spree |
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| waiting4atickle | Feb 27 2018, 07:23 PM Post #2487 |
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A bonny wee lass from Dundee Was researching her family tree -------------------- And decided to go On a massive spending spree |
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| Caro | Mar 1 2018, 05:42 AM Post #2488 |
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A bonny wee lass from Dundee Was researching her family tree Got stuck on a row And decided to go On a massive spending spree. --------------------------------- --------------------------------- He wept and he wailed ------------------ --------------------------------- |
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| Mobson | Mar 1 2018, 11:24 AM Post #2489 |
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--------------------------------- --------------------------------- He wept and he wailed And realised he'd failed --------------------------------- |
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| Douglas | Mar 1 2018, 05:03 PM Post #2490 |
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There was a young man from Dumfries --------------------------------- He wept and he wailed And realised he'd failed --------------------------------- |
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| waiting4atickle | Mar 1 2018, 10:07 PM Post #2491 |
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There was a young man from Dumfries --------------------------------- He wept and he wailed And realised he'd failed To renew his annual lease. |
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| dai Cottomy | Mar 3 2018, 12:41 PM Post #2492 |
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There was a young man from Dumfries Who filled his house with wild geese He wept and he wailed And realised he'd failed To renew his annual lease. A flighty young woman from Ghent |
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| Douglas | Mar 3 2018, 12:50 PM Post #2493 |
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A flighty young woman from Ghent -------------------------------------- -------------------------- -------------------------- And left her with much to repent. |
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| dai Cottomy | Mar 3 2018, 12:57 PM Post #2494 |
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A flighty young woman from Ghent Had problems paying her rent -------------------------- -------------------------- And left her with much to repent. |
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| waiting4atickle | Mar 3 2018, 04:30 PM Post #2495 |
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A flighty young woman from Ghent Had problems paying her rent The Landlord came round -------------------------- And left her with much to repent. |
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| Mobson | Mar 4 2018, 12:14 PM Post #2496 |
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A flighty young woman from Ghent Had problems paying her rent The Landlord came round Proclaimed her tenancy unsound And left her with much to repent. .............................................. She was handed a Notice to Quit ............ ............ ............................................... Edited by Mobson, Mar 4 2018, 12:16 PM.
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| dai Cottomy | Mar 5 2018, 02:54 PM Post #2497 |
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.............................................. She was handed a Notice to Quit ............ ............ She decided to do a moonlight flit |
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| waiting4atickle | Mar 5 2018, 03:15 PM Post #2498 |
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The landlord was a horrible git She was handed a Notice to Quit ............ ............ She decided to do a moonlight flit |
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| dai Cottomy | Mar 5 2018, 03:20 PM Post #2499 |
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The landlord was a horrible git She was handed a Notice to Quit ............ in a fit of pique She decided on a moonlight flit |
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| waiting4atickle | Mar 5 2018, 03:26 PM Post #2500 |
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The landlord was a horrible git She was handed a Notice to Quit Although not unique in a fit of pique She decided on a moonlight flit ---------------------- ---------------------- ------------- ------------- But the snowman had melted away. |
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7:03 AM Jul 13