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Uxbridge English Dictionary; The first post-Apocalypse edition - humanity's depending on you to kickstart the language again.
Topic Started: Sep 18 2012, 02:14 PM (7,722 Views)
tafkaj

Rooflight: a marvellous feat of marsupial aviation.
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waiting4atickle
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Hebrew: a man who makes his own beer.

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Norm Deplume
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stalemate..a friend with a personal problem
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tafkaj

Checkmate: a friend from Brno.
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waiting4atickle
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Allowed: completely and utterly in debt.

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Norm Deplume
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jojoba...A laughing sheep
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tafkaj

<harharhar> <harharhar> <harharhar>

Omelette: a rental agreement taken out by transcendental meditators.
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waiting4atickle
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Just going to lie down in a darkened room.



Edited by waiting4atickle, Mar 27 2013, 11:34 AM.
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Norm Deplume
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Oooooops Tick ! !
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Norm Deplume
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Transcendental meditators....Thoughtful denture couriers
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dai Cottomy
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bifurcate ~ purchase a gift for the Duchess
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tafkaj

Binomial: to starve.
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tafkaj

Check it out: a Prague-based marketeer.
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dai Cottomy
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deliberate: recapture
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tafkaj

Recapture: an administrative area in which everyone says everything twice.
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tafkaj

Filofax: a pastry recipe.
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Norm Deplume
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asteroids...floral haemorrhoids
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dai Cottomy
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polyphony: a fake parrot
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tafkaj

Polyphony: a psittacine comedian.
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waiting4atickle
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Standoffish: fishmonger's display.

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tafkaj

Valiant: an insect between two mountains.
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dai Cottomy
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algorithm - dance popularised by an American enviromentalist.
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tafkaj

Ageism: just the one ejaculate.
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tafkaj

Ad nauseam: condition in which TV viewers vomit when the commercials come on.
Edited by tafkaj, Jul 16 2013, 02:23 PM.
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waiting4atickle
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Tarnish: resembling a small mountain lake.

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waiting4atickle
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Foreshortens: a quartet of midgets. <laugh>

Well, it made me laugh.

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tafkaj

Popcorn: a problem my father had on his toe.
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Norm Deplume
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Partaken ~ Dad has been abducted
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tafkaj

Parboiled: Dad' s been out in the sun too long.
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Norm Deplume
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Parson...~... He's my Dad.
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dai Cottomy
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monogram - a non-stereo record player
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tafkaj

Monogram: 1g.
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Norm Deplume
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Phonograph ~ ...Not the real thing
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dai Cottomy
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clarinets - Mrs Grundy's curtains
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tafkaj

Oboe: the reason Alfie Boe's parents didn't name him Oliver.
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tafkaj

Synergy: the force due to gravity as experienced by evil people.
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dai Cottomy
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stratagems: precious stones found in rock formations
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tafkaj

Strategy: the force due to gravity as experienced Jimi Hendrix.
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dai Cottomy
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peerless: status of the House of Commons
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tafkaj

Movie: a pop festival for cows.
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dai Cottomy
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apology - the study of tablet software
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waiting4atickle
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Simian: native of an east Aegean island.

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dai Cottomy
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approximate: a substitute friend
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tafkaj

Simian: like a mobile phone.
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dai Cottomy
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ramification ~ sheep tupping
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tafkaj

Tupping: what they do to swans on Yorkshire rivers.
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dai Cottomy
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interact: bury an X Factor contestant
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tafkaj

Intercede: to sow a crop.
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dai Cottomy
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interpret ~ ready for burial
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tafkaj

<laugh>

Destroy: a Brummie cowboy who roids again.
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Norm Deplume
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Gaelic...a homosexual ice cream
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tafkaj

Boil: what Brummies produce in their livers.
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tafkaj

Harvest: a base layer worn in fog.
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dai Cottomy
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postulate: miss the last mail collection
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tafkaj

Reverse: vehicle used to take deceased vicars to their final resting places.

Mammogram: in the days before email and mobile phones, an electronic Mother's Day message.

Incomparable: an allegorical tale about salaries.
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dai Cottomy
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emergency: coming out
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tafkaj

[Actually, dai, that's it's fundamental meaning!]

Terrapin: part of an al-Qaida grenade.
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dai Cottomy
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tafkaj
Dec 21 2013, 01:09 PM
[Actually, dai, that's it's fundamental meaning!]

I am assuming that the man on the Clapham omnibus would take the usual meaning


Impeccable: birdproof
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tafkaj

Betray: a deadly beam of photons emitted by, for example, beetroot.
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dai Cottomy
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palliasse ~ a friendly donkey
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tafkaj

Pallisade: The Queen's fizzy drink.
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Norm Deplume
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Palladium...A smelly dance hall
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tafkaj

Apiarist: one of Ms Zadora's hand-arm joints.

Troubador: genuine awful bauxite (for example).
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tafkaj

Measles: wooden frames used to support your canvas when doing self-portraits.

Taliban: a moratorium on adding up.
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dai Cottomy
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palindrome ~ where Michael parks his Tiger Moth

palisade ~ soft drink served at Royal garden parties
Edited by dai Cottomy, Jan 15 2014, 06:34 PM.
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tafkaj

Pomegranate: English igneous rock.
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tafkaj

Template: the agency worker is not on time.
Edited by tafkaj, Jan 25 2014, 12:57 PM.
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tafkaj

Ebola: a digital cricketer.
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dai Cottomy
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inhabit: a fashionable addiction
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tafkaj

Berlitz: The period in 1940 when the Luftwaffe dropped tons of travel guides on London.
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Norm Deplume
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Rampage...The time before steps were invented
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dai Cottomy
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perforate: what a cat does with its nine lives
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tafkaj

Perform: the paperwork a cat has to submit before it's allowed to express contentment.
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dai Cottomy
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bassinette - Good, that's tonight's fish supper sorted
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Norm Deplume
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pseudonym...not quite a real nym
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tafkaj

Chastise: The Prince of Wales's neckwear collection.

Rambling: ovine jewellery.
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waiting4atickle
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Busier: having more buses.

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tafkaj

Bustier: The top deck.
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Norm Deplume
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Decline...On the left hand side of Ant
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Norm Deplume
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Anteroom...Where Dec's partner plays with his PC.
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tafkaj

Antipasta: a substance that is annihilated when brought into contact with spaghetti.
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Norm Deplume
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Declare ~ Where Ant cannot find him
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waiting4atickle
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Thinking: malnourished male monarch.

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tafkaj

<laugh>

Broadband: no women allowed.
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dai Cottomy
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furbelow ~ hirsute nether region
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tafkaj

Furbelow: the deep mooing sound made by an electronic owl-like toy.
Edited by tafkaj, Mar 15 2014, 12:39 PM.
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dai Cottomy
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Firkin ~ shaggy relatives
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tafkaj

1984: Just fewer than 20 people consumed a Channel Four subsidiary television channel.
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dai Cottomy
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Delicate ~ Queen of the charcuterie counter
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tafkaj

Delicate ~ a pet not seen since the charcuterie's unscrupulous owners experienced a fall off in trade.
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dai Cottomy
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apology: the study of software for mobile devices
Edited by dai Cottomy, Apr 5 2014, 12:42 AM.
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tafkaj

Apogee: an app for Windows.
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dai Cottomy
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apex: simian chest muscles
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tafkaj

Distant: an insect that has been called rude names.
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dai Cottomy
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barracks: belonging to Mr.Obama
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tafkaj

Echo: a headless lizard.
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dai Cottomy
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pylon ~ method of boarding a Tube train
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tafkaj

Busty: a refreshing drink served on public road transport.
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dai Cottomy
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modify ~ The anticipated effect on India of its new Prime Minister
Edited by dai Cottomy, May 17 2014, 02:47 PM.
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waiting4atickle
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Anapestic: in the manner of a BBC moderator (obs.)

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tafkaj

<laugh> ... But you might be thinking of her invention designed to help ladies caught short while driving - it never achieved quite the same success as the SheWee ...

Primark: the splodge around the eye caused when someone's daubed shoe polish around the keyhole.

Migrant: money I was given to study at university.
Edited by tafkaj, May 31 2014, 12:07 PM.
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