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Clerihews
Topic Started: Oct 19 2012, 12:47 PM (13,163 Views)
rumbaba
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The Prince of Wales
often regales
Government ministers with his buffoonery
exposing himself to the risk of lampoonery
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Rikiiboy
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David Moyes
No big noise
In retreat
After Thailand defeat.

http://m.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/23303010
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 14 2013, 08:50 AM.
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Rikiiboy
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Barack Obama
Tries to defuse the drama
Calls for calm reflection
After juries guilty rejection.
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Rikiiboy
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James Anderson
It's not propaganda son
Was man of the match
In the Ozzie despatch. <ozzibatsman>
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 16 2013, 02:36 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Robert Galbraith?
Is nothing safe
The cuckoo's calling
J K Rowling's spawning.
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Rikiiboy
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Charles Philip Arthur George
Maybe trying the old tax forge
Some jiggery Pokery
Ohh! Okey dokery!
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Rikiiboy
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Cecile Kyenge
Is buzzing like a bee
After racist Italian
Compares her to Orangutan.
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rumbaba
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Alan Whicker
was slicker
than your average
and enjoyed the odd beverage
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Rikiiboy
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Margaret Thatcher
Still getting right back at yer
As utility bills from north to south
Leave a bitter taste in your mouth.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 16 2013, 06:52 AM.
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Rikiiboy
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Ray Wilkins
Summoned for his sins
Hit a traffic island
While on the sauce from the highland.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 16 2013, 02:35 PM.
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tafkaj

Joanne Rowling ...
Does it rhyme with 'bowling'?
Or perhaps with 'cowling' ... ?
The uncertainty has me howling!
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rumbaba
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Martin Amis
was desperate to be famous
in his own right and got mad
when anyone mentioned his dad
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rumbaba
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Alain de Botton
serves up mutton
dressed as lamb
but it smells like ham

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dai Cottomy
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Jeremy Hunt
To be perfectly blunt
Is finding it hell
Making sick people well
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rumbaba
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Well done Dai for avoiding the obvious Jeremy Hunt rhyme :)
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dai Cottomy
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It wouldn't work with punt, Rum.
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Rikiiboy
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Michael Adebolajo '
Will be jailed we know
But that gap in his smile
Might keep his trap shut a while.

Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 18 2013, 10:01 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Melvin Smith
Gave us a whiff
Of a cheeky smile
He'll be missed a while.
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Rikiiboy
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Frankie Boyle says
"I've not eaten in four days"
Highlighting Shaker Aamer
In Guantanamo bay drama.
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waiting4atickle
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Eldrick Tont Woods
Has never delivered the goods
Unless leading after round three:
So a claret jug for Lee??

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rumbaba
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Mel Smith
has been showered with
praise, which is entirely merited,
as he was enormously talented and free spirited
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waiting4atickle
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Phil Mickelson
Has a few nickels won.
He's certainly not a golfing mug
And will soon collect the claret jug.

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Rikiiboy
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David Cameron
He'll soon be gone
Banning porn?
That's how the Tories were born.
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Rikiiboy
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Kate and Will
What a thrill
Their bundle of joy?
It's a boy.
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Rikiiboy
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Tyron Martin
And his parting
As Emmett Till
Racism still....
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 23 2013, 09:05 AM.
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Rikiiboy
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Beyonce Knowles
Stopped reaching souls
When a fan grabbed her hair
and cropped her halo there. <devi>;;
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rumbaba
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Rikiiboy
brings a little bit of joy
by taking the time
to comment on events using rhyme
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Rikiiboy
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George Alexander Louis
If not third in line then who is?(he)
The boy who would be King
After my time I'm thinking. 45T7U9IOP0OPUTGTGYHKUJ
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 25 2013, 09:26 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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The big blue cock
Is such a shock
It'll make you stare
In Trafalgar square. <phwor>
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Rikiiboy
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The Archbishop of Canterbury
Warns Wonga I'm upping the ante sonny
Promising the church'll generate
A new lower interest rate.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 25 2013, 08:32 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Welby the archbishop
Abandons his sinking ship
As church coffers are stronger
From backing Wonga.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 25 2013, 11:08 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Mohammed Morsi
Went off course he
Hamas and the brotherhood
Were ultimately up to no good.
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Rikiiboy
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François G G Hollande
Has no magic wand
If you are reading this
We can now all take the urine.
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Rikiiboy
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Stuart Hall
Left feeling small
Court of appeal tells him that
They're doubling the time he's in to bat.
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Rikiiboy
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Theresa May
Diabetes they say
To be jabbed twice day
Let's form a queue,hey?
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Rikiiboy
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Francisco Jose Garzon Amo
Was certainly not driving slow
As he's not now in jail
He's at a spec savers sale.
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rumbaba
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Rikiiboy
Jul 28 2013, 08:27 AM
Theresa May
Diabetes they say
To be jabbed twice day
Let's form a queue,hey?
Inspired <ok>
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Rikiiboy
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Nabil Fahmy
Says they've all gone barmy
We need to stop the violence
And give us some silence.
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rumbaba
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Violet May
arrived on Thursday
Lauren next door was long overdue
But baby is fine and mother is too :)
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tafkaj

Violet Elizabeth Bott
Was the little female tot
In the Just William books;
For me she'll always have Bonnie Langton's looks. <rose> :wub:
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Rikiiboy
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Fernando Alonso
Didn't win again so
He'll soon wake up in bed
With dah horses head.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 29 2013, 07:20 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Gareth Bale
Not for sale
Spurs refuse bid
From Real Madrid.
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rumbaba
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On fire, Rikii <ok>
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Rikiiboy
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Stella Creasey
Feeling uneasy
Trollers misuse
Tweeting abuse.
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rumbaba
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Is this your preferred, new medium for commenting on current affair, Rikii?

It's certainly working for you <ok>
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Rikiiboy
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(Just play in' rumbaba <laugh> )

Robert Mugabe
No kemosahbee
As Morgan Tsvangirai
Waits to kiss him goodbye.

Nelson Mandela
What a feller
Now ninety five
And still alive.

Vicky Pryce
Didn't think twice
Revenge complete
As Chris Hugne loses seat.

Bradley Manning
Ain't doing any planning
When the jailer drops that latch
'e's gonna be a biatch.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 30 2013, 09:55 PM.
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rumbaba
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Stanley Green
attracted a lot of mean
and abusive behaviour
in his quest to be the nation’s dietary saviour
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Norm Deplume
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Nelson Mandela
One time, bad Fellah
A "Terrorist Red"
Killed folk in their bed.
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rumbaba
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Stanley Green
thought eating a bean
or any other source of protein
would lead to behaviour that was obscene
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rumbaba
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Stanley Green
Felt it necessary to intervene
In case we should be unwitting
In exacerbating our passions with sitting


Stanley Green
Had reservations about protein.
He felt that it must
Not be allowed to inflame one’s fleshly lust
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Rikiiboy
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Jose Mujica
He shout eureeka
He speak out of ass
After he smokey grass.
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Rikiiboy
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Kenny Samson
You're in a jam son
It's such a wrench
Hearing you're kipping on a park bench.
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Rikiiboy
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Silvio Berlusconi
Fiddles and lowers the tone he
Is facing house arrest
As a tax fraud pest.
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Rikiiboy
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Gareth Bale
Was for sale
To Real Madrid
For a hundred and five million quid.

Christiano Rinaldo
Could be on the move so
Manchester United
Are getting excited

Wayne Rooney
and his silver spoon he
Might soon be up for sale
As we think he's going stale.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 2 2013, 10:39 AM.
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tafkaj

Gareth bale
Cannot fail
To become a multimillionaire
So long as he plays with flair.

*************************

Robert Mugabe
Reminds me of kohlrabi -
Tasteless and ugly;
That fits him snugly!

*************************

Silvio Berlusconi
Would shag a Shetland pony
And pretend it's related
To a sheik he once hated.
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Rikiiboy
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Moya Greene
The mail boss queen
Pays back a 120k
Just small fry,hey?
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Norm Deplume
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Of all the names on earth
He chose Rhun ap Iowerth
Plaid A.M. for Ynys Mon
Makes me think it could be a con
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Rikiiboy
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Peter Capaldi
Might shop at Aldi
But'll soon be in view
As the new doctor who......
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Rikiiboy
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David Cameron
Gets a stammer on
Prospect of Spanish border fees
Leaves him climbing trees.

William Shaw "cross"
Charity commission boss
Rant, as thirty aid workers here
Earn more than a hundred grand a year.

Professor Don Berwick
Takes on NHS sick
To restore the patients calm
With a new zero harm.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 6 2013, 10:21 AM.
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Rikiiboy
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Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner
Some here would like to Birch her
As she relights the Falklands desire
To rekindle her re-election fire.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 6 2013, 10:28 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Godfrey Bloom
Boom!Boom!
Leaves the PC world numb
With his bongo bongo drum.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2386482/So-right-UKIP-MEP-Godfrey-Blooms-comments-caused-storm--ample-evidence-claims.html
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 8 2013, 09:47 AM.
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dai Cottomy
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The antics of Godfrey Bloom
Make some people fume
But behind all the non PC biz
He mostly tells it like it is
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Rikiiboy
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Monty Panesar
Drunk in a Brighton bar
After a little altercation
Pissed on bouncers in frustration.


Monty Panesar
Drunk, fined ninety quid ta
Paul Gascoigne similar offence
That's one thousand two hundred,no sense?
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 7 2013, 08:57 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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(oz)
Peter Dowling
Accused of wine fouling
It's now all a blur
After using his penis to stir.
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Rikiiboy
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Mike Carney
Gives us the blarney
The UK'll do great
Sticking to low interest rate.
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Rikiiboy
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Tian Tian
Might be preggers man
Wham bang
Thank you Yang Guang.

Oprah Winfrey
Might have got in free
But now gives racist nag
And no Swiss handbag.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 9 2013, 02:14 PM.
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tafkaj

Greg Dyke
Doesn't like
The idea of the footie World Cup
Being played when temperatures are up.
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Rikiiboy
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Stuart Broad
Inspired, ohh my gawd!
Australia crashes
Giving England the ashes. <cricket>
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Rikiiboy
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Jeremy Paxman
Let's get the facts man
He's been seen and heard
Sporting a new beard.
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Rikiiboy
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Parliament's food and drink
Causing quite a stink
A seven million quid subsidy
Is it all bloody free?
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Rikiiboy
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Mrs Justice Eleanor King
Ordered the disarming of DE's thing
surgeons will make a crackle
Snipping his old sporting tackle. :'(
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rumbaba
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I've actually eaten in the H 0f C dining rooms on two occasions. I remember Tony Barber politely allowing me to help myself to gazpacho ahead of him at the buffet, many years ago.
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rumbaba
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Dave Lee Travis
this is
the moment of reckoning
and justice is beckoning
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Rikiiboy
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Ed Milliband
Is rather too bland
Lord Prescott (2jags 2jabs)
Thinks he's lost the plot.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 18 2013, 09:17 AM.
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Rikiiboy
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Gregg Wallace
His head is in ice
As he feels glum
As Bates feels girlfriends bum.

David Miranda?
It's all propaganda
His nine hour wait?
The plane was late.

Hope Powell
Fails and gets towel
In women's soccer
Sacking shocker.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 20 2013, 12:27 PM.
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tafkaj

Gareth Bale
Should draw a veil
Over his Tottenham career -
He'll soon be out on his ear.
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Rikiiboy
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Bradley Manning
Gets a tanning
For espionage he hears
That'll be thirty five years.
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Rikiiboy
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Barack Obama
Feeling calmer
After plumber takes weeks
To stem Wiki leaks.
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Rikiiboy
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Bradley Manning
Is now planning
Now that he's in nick he'll be
A new dame named Chelsea.

Bradley Manning
Is getting a fanning
As cell mates form a queue
To move in with Chelsea too.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 22 2013, 03:21 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Cuthbert Ottaway
What a great sportsman hey?
I'll remember won't you?
The 30th of November 1872.
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Rikiiboy
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David Patrick Griffin
Is in court sniffin'
A hairy monster it's claimed
Could well be named and shamed.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 23 2013, 12:40 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Chen Guanming
Rickshaw king
Is now going to go
All the way to Rio.
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tafkaj

Kevin Pietersen
Should tell those Aussie men
That, like him or not,
His team mates would rather have him batting for them than some half-arsed Aussie clot.
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Rikiiboy
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Fergie and Andy?
Why that's just dandy
Will we get another shot
Of them retying the knot.

Muammer Gaddafi
Had a good laugh he
Always had the clout
To put his end about.

The Syria campaign
It's deja vu" again
So this time let's all shout
"KEEP OUR TROOPS OUT"
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 26 2013, 07:18 PM.
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tafkaj

Bashir Assad
Has gone quite mad;
His English wife
Must fear for her life.
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Rikiiboy
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Dmitry Rogozin
Says the west's poking it's nose in
Like a monkey with a grenade
Against Islamist tirade.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 28 2013, 05:46 AM.
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Rikiiboy
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Cameron and Obama
Enter Syria drama
Looking for satisfaction
With a military reaction?

Bashir Assad?
Let's wait a tad
Or it'll be Saddam Hussein
All over again.
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2008/mar/19/iraq
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 28 2013, 07:09 AM.
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Rolf Harris
My,how you embarass
Tie your kangaroo down sport
You have been caught.

Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 30 2013, 06:11 AM.
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Rikiiboy
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David Cameron
Turns his glamour on
But gets no satisfaction
With "NO!" vote on military action.
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rumbaba
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You are on fire Riki <ok>
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tafkaj

Ed Miliband
Sticks his head in the sand;
He craves popularity
Over and above morality.
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waiting4atickle
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Aaron James Finch
Made England flinch
With sixes galore
And a new record T20 international score.

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Rikiiboy
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Diana Spencer
Did "they" dispense her
An SAS operation
To fool the nation ?


http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2407571/Princess-Diana-SAS-murder-claim--mad-think-says-SUE-REID.html
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 31 2013, 11:31 AM.
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tafkaj

[Interestingly (to me, at least), Rikii, the name Spencer derives from the earlier Despenser, which itself derives from the role of King's storekeeper (effectively).]

Nelson Mandela
Is not a well fella;
I wish the media
Wouldn't rely on Wikipedia.
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Rikiiboy
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Vladimir Putin
Hints Obama shoudn't put the boot in
Utter rubbish that Syria
Would create such hysteria.
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Barack Obama
A little calmer
Going to congress
Makes time to digress.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Sep 1 2013, 08:06 AM.
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Sir David frost
He's lost
He shut the big door
At seventy four.

Gareth Bale
Like a fairy tale
Eighty five point three million quid
That Real Madrid bid.
Edited by Rikiiboy, Sep 1 2013, 07:51 PM.
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Rikiiboy
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Vince Cable
Should put cards on table
and please explain
This Assad fiasco again.
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/revealed-government-let-british-company-export-nerve-gas-chemicals-to-syria-8793642.html
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tafkaj

Michael Gove
Found that Labour drove
Him to unleash a foul-mouthed tirade -
On such outbursts are reputations made.
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Rikiiboy
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Greg Dyke
You can say what you like
England won't win the world cup
While foreigners lock the premier league up.

Wayne Rooney
Going Looney
And is going to try
Operation for third eye.
http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/news/football-rooney-posts-picture-head-injury-165944935.html

Roy Hodgson
Is not trying to dodge son
When he meets the press later he'll say
"Only 32% of premier league can play"
Edited by Rikiiboy, Sep 5 2013, 08:06 AM.
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Ian Duncan Smith
Your welfare overhaul's a myth
The universal credit aint working
and The National Audit Office's smirking.
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