| Clerihews | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Oct 19 2012, 12:47 PM (13,160 Views) | |
| rumbaba | Oct 19 2012, 12:47 PM Post #1 |
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The Prince of Wales often regales Government ministers with his buffoonery exposing himself to the risk of lampoonery |
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| rumbaba | May 1 2014, 07:45 PM Post #401 |
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| Rikiiboy | May 2 2014, 06:01 AM Post #402 |
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Jeremy Clarkson N..... gaff will nark some Asking for forgiveness To get out of the mess. |
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| tafkaj | May 2 2014, 11:21 AM Post #403 |
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Vince Cable Has proven he's able To imitate Gordon Brown - He does a very good impression of a financially illiterate clown. |
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| tafkaj | May 2 2014, 11:31 AM Post #404 |
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I'm no particular fan of Clarkson (nor Top Gear, for that matter), but in the past I've often defended his journalistic style on the basis of it being a kind of via negativa approach - by the responses of others to him does he thus reveal their own characters. His puerile apology for the latest bit of trumped-up controversy, however, reveals just what a dimwitted arse he really is. He's not racist - I don't think that can be doubted - and he's probably not truly sexist either, but in all his 50-odd years on this planet he doesn't seem to have worked out what was good and what was bad in his past and done anything to correct the bad. Most of us go through life wondering how we 'got here', as it were, and trying not to perpetuate the worst bits in the next generation. Clarkson, etc., appears to have been happy to just make £millions from the licence fee payer (without ever revealing the cost to them of doing so - the BBC refuse to reveal the Top Gear budget) and to remain in the adolescent emptiness that one might expect from a 13-year-old who can't be bothered to work at school. Edited by tafkaj, May 10 2014, 12:43 PM.
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| waiting4atickle | May 2 2014, 09:08 PM Post #405 |
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Maxwell Frank Clifford Is a man with whom many have differed. For their views he didn't give tuppence: How good to see him get his comeuppance. |
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| Rikiiboy | May 3 2014, 06:42 PM Post #406 |
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Ryan Giggs Is no Mr Bigs As black cat team Get the cream... |
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| tafkaj | May 10 2014, 12:48 PM Post #407 |
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David Cameron Will continute to hammer on Miliband's door 'Til he's in politics no more. |
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| Rikiiboy | May 20 2014, 09:35 AM Post #408 |
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Louis van Gaal Will have his back to the wall And considered a turd If they finish lower than third. Ryan Giggs Should be looking for digs 'cause if Van Gaal's strong He won't be there long? |
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| Rikiiboy | May 24 2014, 05:42 PM Post #409 |
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The wally with the brolly? Good golly He's just had a slap From the juicy Redknapp.... |
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| Rikiiboy | May 26 2014, 07:03 AM Post #410 |
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Nigel Farage? I'm in charge! The other three parties? Were stuffed me hearties! Nick Clegg? Rotten egg Nick how was it? I've lost my deposit? Ed Milliband? It went as planned? You Kipped while voting was done And simple? Nigel won! Dave Cameron? He'll just stammer on His European stance? Now? No chance. Edited by Rikiiboy, May 26 2014, 07:11 AM.
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| Rikiiboy | May 27 2014, 05:09 AM Post #411 |
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Nick Clegg He has come down a peg He's no longer bubbling It's all very troubling. |
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| tafkaj | May 27 2014, 01:58 PM Post #412 |
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Nick Clegg Will soon have to beg To remain in post - I think he's probably toast. |
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| Rikiiboy | May 29 2014, 10:15 PM Post #413 |
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Blair and Bush Still hush hush Chilcot inquiry Not very fiery.... |
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| rumbaba | Jun 2 2014, 01:24 PM Post #414 |
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King Juan Carlos of Spain Is ending his reign He hopes his abdication Will be good for the nation |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 2 2014, 10:04 PM Post #415 |
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Juan Carlos Alfonso Víctor María de Borbón y Borbón-Dos Sicilias Is a Spanish pater familias. He has been the King of Spain awhiles, But is now making way for Ashley Giles. (Ashley Giles, former England off-spinner, was known, perhaps ironically, as 'The King of Spin'. During his benefit year for Warwickshire, promotional mugs were produced which were meant to have that as the legend - but the manufacturers made a mistake...) |
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| rumbaba | Jun 2 2014, 10:17 PM Post #416 |
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Nice one Tick
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| Mobson | Jun 3 2014, 06:56 AM Post #417 |
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Edited by Mobson, Jun 3 2014, 06:57 AM.
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 3 2014, 11:23 AM Post #418 |
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One for the archives.
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| rumbaba | Jun 3 2014, 12:13 PM Post #419 |
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Yes, Tick a Clerihew classic that I will shamelessly steal and put on facebook, along with a picture of said mug.
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| tafkaj | Jun 3 2014, 02:24 PM Post #420 |
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Prince Giuseppe Tomasi di Lampedusa (No relation to John Tusa) Would turn in his grave If he could see how visitors to his beautiful island behave. |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 3 2014, 04:27 PM Post #421 |
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Good one, Taf. |
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| waiting4atickle | Jun 3 2014, 04:30 PM Post #422 |
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Where did you find the picture, Rum? The only one that came up on google images bears the peculiar legend "Kind of Spain". |
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| rumbaba | Jun 3 2014, 05:49 PM Post #423 |
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Er, right enough Tick, that'll teach me to wear my glasses |
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| tafkaj | Jun 7 2014, 12:51 PM Post #424 |
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waiting4atickle Isn't quite so fickle As I once thought - Clearly friendship CAN be bought. |
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| rumbaba | Jun 11 2014, 01:13 PM Post #425 |
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Janet Street-Porter fancies herself as a TV reporter but I can say with absolute veracity that I don't fancy her in any capacity |
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| tafkaj | Jun 14 2014, 12:16 PM Post #426 |
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Janet Street-Porter Is an electrician's daughter, Which might explain Why she causes so much pain. |
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| dai Cottomy | Jun 14 2014, 12:55 PM Post #427 |
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Angelina Jolie Has been made a Dame - Golly! But it's not about Her delectable pout. |
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| Rikiiboy | Jun 15 2014, 07:55 AM Post #428 |
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Roy Hodgson Is that a new dodge son? What's more? Rooney has four legs,but still couldn't score! |
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| tafkaj | Jun 16 2014, 11:39 AM Post #429 |
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Angelina Jolie Is now almost holy: Poor old Brad Will think he's been had. |
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| rumbaba | Jun 17 2014, 11:25 AM Post #430 |
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Phil Neville doesn''t need a Breville he will soon be toast and his P45 is in the post |
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| tafkaj | Jun 17 2014, 02:39 PM Post #431 |
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Wazza, Just like Gazza, Might burst into tears If England exit early, as everyone fears. |
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| rumbaba | Jun 17 2014, 03:01 PM Post #432 |
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Phil Neville doesn't make entry level in the punditry stakes he is no great shakes |
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| rumbaba | Jun 19 2014, 11:15 AM Post #433 |
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The Spanish Team lived the football dream but for the 2014 World Cup it's time to wake up |
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| Rikiiboy | Jun 20 2014, 06:19 AM Post #434 |
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Steven Gerrard Caught off guard With back head head on And England are gone.... |
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| Rikiiboy | Jun 20 2014, 06:14 PM Post #435 |
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Gerrard and co Off you go Twenty fourteen Now a has been... |
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| tafkaj | Jun 23 2014, 11:39 AM Post #436 |
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Costa Rica You'd think would be weaker Than Oxlade-Chamberlain's knee - Tomorrow we'll see. |
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| Rikiiboy | Jun 24 2014, 06:43 PM Post #437 |
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Daniel Sturridge Doesn't lack courage But his game wavers Cus he needs to go to specsavers. Edited by Rikiiboy, Jun 24 2014, 06:46 PM.
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| Rikiiboy | Jun 24 2014, 08:31 PM Post #438 |
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Giorgio Chiellini He caused quite a scene he Had quite a fright After Suarez vampire bite. |
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 8 2014, 11:14 PM Post #439 |
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Poor Brazil Boy do they feel ill As seven one whacking Sends 'em packing! |
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| waiting4atickle | Jul 8 2014, 11:35 PM Post #440 |
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Luiz Felipe Scolari: His team ain't no Ferrari. Beaten six goals clear By a German machine that didn't get past third gear. |
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 10:58 AM Post #441 |
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Arjen Robben was weaving and bobbin' and the Dutch were thrivin' on his duckin' and divin' Arjen Robben is weepin' and sobbin' his penalty was cool but life can be Krul Arjen Robben didn't get a lob in or a decent shot sorry mate, that's yer lot |
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 11:18 AM Post #442 |
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Tim Krul acted the fool which was crudely effective but, against Argentina,the Dutch penalty strategy was defective Edited by rumbaba, Jul 14 2014, 12:27 PM.
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 11:20 AM Post #443 |
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Louis Van Gaal, now the Dutch are out, shall think about what he can do to revitalise Man U |
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 12:37 PM Post #444 |
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Big Phil Scolari won't last till January in his present position, which is thought by various commentators to be quite precarious |
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 12:41 PM Post #445 |
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Robin van Persie was shown no mercy by the Argentinians who put paid to his world cup shenanigans |
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 12:46 PM Post #446 |
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Adrian Chiles is the worst football pundit by miles well, apart from Phil Neville who failed miserably on every level |
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 12:47 PM Post #447 |
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Thierry Henry exhibits bon homie but I can't take seriously a felly that wears a cardigan on the telly Edited by rumbaba, Jul 10 2014, 12:49 PM.
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 03:06 PM Post #448 |
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Robert Peston doesn't sound like he comes from Preston his strangualted diction is stranger than fiction |
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| rumbaba | Jul 10 2014, 03:13 PM Post #449 |
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Ron Vlaar isn't a penalty star but at least he was willing to go first, unlike his teammates, but the result was less than thrilling |
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 11 2014, 06:58 PM Post #450 |
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man rum!Louis Suarez I like it he says (sez) One big bite and WOW! I'm at Barcelona now! Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 11 2014, 07:00 PM.
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| rumbaba | Jul 14 2014, 09:07 AM Post #451 |
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Lionel Messi I must confess he, IMO, didn't merit the golden ball that really was not a good call |
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| rumbaba | Jul 14 2014, 11:23 AM Post #452 |
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Alan Hansen has had his swansong as a TV pundit your milionaire lifestyle Alan, now who's going to fund it? Edited by rumbaba, Jul 14 2014, 08:16 PM.
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 14 2014, 10:45 PM Post #453 |
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William Hague He 's got the plague Dave's in the s**t He 's made to quit? |
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 15 2014, 08:33 AM Post #454 |
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David Cameron Goes for glamour on Cabinet reshuffle Causing kerfuffle. |
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| rumbaba | Jul 15 2014, 08:46 AM Post #455 |
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Michael Gove has been given the shove from education which is good for the nation |
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 15 2014, 08:51 AM Post #456 |
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Liz Truss Gets on Cameron's bus As no one old survives New night of long knives. Ken Clarke The fizzled spark Relegated to the back Out of the craic. Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 15 2014, 08:55 AM.
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 16 2014, 07:32 AM Post #457 |
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Michael Gove Who many loath Was defeated of course By a Trojan horse. Theresa May Some say Can now play With Gove out the way? Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 16 2014, 07:40 AM.
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| rumbaba | Jul 16 2014, 10:30 AM Post #458 |
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Theresa May looked dishevelled and grey and when Keith Vaz pushed her, she was slow to answer 'yes or no' |
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 16 2014, 09:36 PM Post #459 |
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David Cameron Goes for glamour on His 2015 selection Of Dave's angels for election. |
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| rumbaba | Jul 17 2014, 01:32 PM Post #460 |
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Theresa May has has had her day she may scheme and plot but I think Theresa May, not |
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 17 2014, 10:56 PM Post #461 |
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Michael Gove Was in a fix by Jove He was stuck in the bog Filling in the captain's log? |
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| rumbaba | Jul 18 2014, 12:36 PM Post #462 |
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Michael Gove I wish somebody would shove your head down the pan you have probably guessed I'm not a fan |
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| tafkaj | Jul 19 2014, 12:29 PM Post #463 |
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Vladimir Putin Loves a bit of shootin'; But he doesn't like to admit it When, the target, he's hit it. |
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| Rikiiboy | Jul 26 2014, 07:58 AM Post #464 |
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Ed Milliband? He does look rather bland "I do look like Wallace,not a PM in waiting" No wonder Cameron's already celebrating! Edited by Rikiiboy, Jul 26 2014, 07:59 AM.
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| tafkaj | Aug 5 2014, 02:21 PM Post #465 |
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Ecclestone, Bernie, With the money he can earn, he Can pay off the law - Not an option available to the poor. |
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| Rikiiboy | Aug 16 2014, 03:37 PM Post #466 |
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Van Gaal Learns to snarl As Swansea loss Rocks new boss. |
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| Rikiiboy | Aug 24 2014, 05:42 PM Post #467 |
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Manchester united Left unexcited As two games played Equals one point paid. (LOL!) |
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| Rikiiboy | Aug 26 2014, 05:48 AM Post #468 |
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Salmond v Darling Once again they end up snarling Will Scottish law and order Finally close our border?
Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 26 2014, 05:49 AM.
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| Rikiiboy | Aug 26 2014, 09:02 PM Post #469 |
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Louis Van Gaal and Ryan Giggs No longer the bigwigs As M K Dons Stuff four past the useless ones. |
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| Rikiiboy | Aug 28 2014, 08:17 AM Post #470 |
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Shaun Wright Is squirming alright He knows there's no excuse For any form of child abuse! Shaun Wright Thinks he's up for the fight But, it was his Labour party connection That won him his commissioners election! Edited by Rikiiboy, Aug 28 2014, 08:28 AM.
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| rumbaba | Aug 29 2014, 01:52 PM Post #471 |
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Douglas Carswell was a tory MP for a spell but now he has jumped ship to join UKIP |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 10 2014, 12:41 PM Post #472 |
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Cameron,Clegg and Milliband Went to Scotland to make a stand Salmond simply stood and mocked The three amigos still look shell shocked! |
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| rumbaba | Sep 10 2014, 12:43 PM Post #473 |
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Nick Clegg hasn't a leg (in the credibility stakes) to stand on and neither has Milliband or Cameron |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 11 2014, 10:34 PM Post #474 |
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Oscar Pistorious Is victorious With murder verdict override He's only charged with culpable homicide. |
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| waiting4atickle | Sep 11 2014, 10:59 PM Post #475 |
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Oscar Leonard Carl Pistorius Has become exceedingly notorious. Not for the blades on which he runs, But the reckless way he uses guns. |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 15 2014, 06:31 PM Post #476 |
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U 2 Who the feck are you? No longer cool Gone, with Apple removal tool. |
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| rumbaba | Sep 15 2014, 08:26 PM Post #477 |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 16 2014, 09:33 AM Post #478 |
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Shaun wright Put up a fight Now that's all past He's gone at last! |
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| rumbaba | Sep 18 2014, 12:45 PM Post #479 |
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Gordon Brown went to Glasgow Town and made a speech that was 'barnstorming' did it work? We'll find out in the morning |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 18 2014, 01:35 PM Post #480 |
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Alex Salmond? Of him, some are fond If he wins he has planned To change from Scots to Salmond's land. |
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| rumbaba | Sep 18 2014, 02:01 PM Post #481 |
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Alistair Darling tried to win by snarling then Cameron, Miliband and Clegg changed tack and decided to beg |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 18 2014, 08:19 PM Post #482 |
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Justin Welby Just may well be An ordinary sod Who doesn't believe in god? |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 19 2014, 01:14 PM Post #483 |
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Dennis Waterman You know you ought to man Get a makeup fix When you leave new tricks. |
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| rumbaba | Sep 19 2014, 02:54 PM Post #484 |
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I thought I would reprise this old one Alex Salmond doesn't look like an almond but Nigel Farage does look like some kind of nut |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 22 2014, 08:51 AM Post #485 |
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Louis Van Gaal Has got some gall He's up and jumping With Leicester's five three thumping. |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 24 2014, 07:13 AM Post #486 |
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David Cameron Didn't enamour "one" After gossiping that He had her "purring"like a cat. |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 28 2014, 08:37 AM Post #487 |
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George Clooney Is over the moon he Says goodbye to bachelor life And takes Amal alamuddin as wife. |
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 29 2014, 11:40 AM Post #488 |
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Hans Christian Anderson Your memory panders on As the tory conference will strive To keep your fairy tales alive! http://www.economicshelp.org/blog/334/uk-economy/uk-national-debt/ Edited by Rikiiboy, Nov 23 2014, 12:00 AM.
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| Rikiiboy | Sep 29 2014, 04:49 PM Post #489 |
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Ian Duncan Smith? Takes the fruit gives us the pith But you can spend your new benefits card In the workhouse yard? |
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| Rikiiboy | Oct 15 2014, 03:18 PM Post #490 |
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Lord Freud Had best avoid The disabled quick Before he gets attacked with a walking stick! |
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| Rikiiboy | Oct 18 2014, 03:13 PM Post #491 |
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Jeremy Clarkson You're in the dark son Your heart must be bleeding After being nicked for speeding! |
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| Rikiiboy | Oct 21 2014, 10:11 AM Post #492 |
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Darek Fidyka Shouted eureka! With scientists showing How nasal stem cells got his paralised legs going. |
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| Rikiiboy | Oct 31 2014, 05:31 PM Post #493 |
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Ed Milliband Is tight fisted,we understand As it makes no sense To give a beggar just two pence. |
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| Rikiiboy | Oct 31 2014, 10:14 PM Post #494 |
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Virgin galactic Last flight trajic As desert crash Ends hope of space bash. Fiona Woolf Can't bridge the gulf As Lord Brittan link Kicks up a stink. Edited by Rikiiboy, Oct 31 2014, 10:19 PM.
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| Rikiiboy | Nov 4 2014, 09:18 AM Post #495 |
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Norman Baker Wanted to get May and shake her Because he understood He was a cookoo walking through mud. |
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| dai Cottomy | Nov 4 2014, 11:23 AM Post #496 |
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Theresa May Had her say The choices she made Didn't quite make the grade |
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| Rikiiboy | Nov 21 2014, 07:02 AM Post #497 |
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Mark Reckless Not so feckless In deafeating Dave With UKip's tidal wave. Emily Thornberry Accused of snobbery Forced to resign Over England ensign. Edited by Rikiiboy, Nov 21 2014, 07:09 AM.
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| Rikiiboy | Nov 21 2014, 05:32 PM Post #498 |
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Nigel Farage He's in charge Tory lead slip As punters vote for UKIP. |
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| Rikiiboy | Nov 22 2014, 11:16 PM Post #499 |
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Bob Geldof Should've selled off That band aid song Before the pong! |
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| Rikiiboy | Nov 23 2014, 03:12 PM Post #500 |
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Lewis Hamilton 2014 champion Winning as good as it can get With Nicole kissing his helmet!
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Yes, Tick a Clerihew classic that I will shamelessly steal and put on facebook, along with a picture of said mug.
man rum!

7:03 AM Jul 13