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| [REVIEW] MST: Dreams can come true!; Advice is welcome. | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Dec 9 2008, 10:53 PM (564 Views) | |
| Refia | Dec 9 2008, 10:53 PM Post #1 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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MST: Dreams can come true! Read the story here. Images of the sporkers (click the names to see): Sesshoumaru (From the anime/manga "InuYasha") Mia (From the GBA game "Golden Sun") Refia (From the DS game "Final Fantasy III") Toa Ignika (From "Bionicle") Comments? Advice? Anything? |
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| Siany-T | Dec 9 2008, 11:41 PM Post #2 |
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King of Nothing
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Nice MST Refie!
Erm I think you may have meant something else since you said they had books as well as books.
*Mary-Sue alarm goes off* Jack I thought you had disabled that. But I agree I smell a Sue.
Because someone had punched her in the head and she was dizzy.
What's the betting that they will not be the hinderance they really are?
Except a pointless description that could have been woven into the story. |
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Merlin: Thank you. Arthur: For what? For lying to my father to save your worthless hide? If you ever put me in that situation again, Merlin, I will clap you irons myself. Merlin, Series 2 David: Oh and John. My TARDIS... mine. Say sorry. John: Sorry. Tonight's the Night: Doctor Who Special Team Demyx - 'cause that is how I roll! | |
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| MackenzieW | Dec 10 2008, 12:31 AM Post #3 |
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Resident Time Lady
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Not even the first chapter and the author has already achieved a fail.
DING DING! We have a winner!
Actually, that's a pretty usual name. Has the curves in the right places and big boobs ;P. Well at least she's not terribly thin, but probably has an A cup so doesn't realize how much big boobs could get in the way.
Why do I think this was copied straight out of the author's MySpace profile?
Actually, if she's eighteen, she's probably in college. Meaning that "living on her own" is probably a dorm or academic housing. And take it from a girl who dormed, not everyone in the dorms were studious. Can't wait to see the rest. |
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You are the music while the music lasts--T.S. Eliot "Stop the damn texting and pick up a book!"--Grandmama, "The Addams Family" (Musical) "Tomorrow will be better for as long as America keeps alive the ideals of freedom and a better life." —Walt Disney "I wake in the loneliness of sunrise When the deep purple heaven turns blue And start to pray As I pray each day That I’ll hear some word from you I lie in the loneliness of evening Looking out on a silver-flaked sea And ask the moon Oh how soon, how soon Will my love come home to me"--"Loneliness of Evening," Cinderella "Thank you, Lord You have brought us Safe to shore Be our strength and protection ever more. A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire"--Heartland, as performed by Celtic Thunder I'm writing a novel! A Guide to Fanfiction for Dummies! My Little Corner I'm on Book Country! | |
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| jules14 | Dec 10 2008, 04:02 AM Post #4 |
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(Wo)man on a Mission
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I saw this fic on ff.net today. I'm getting some serious troll vibes off it; the "big boobs" bit seems excessively immature even for a Suethor. Still, I'm anxious to read the rest of your MST. |
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| Refia | Dec 10 2008, 07:55 AM Post #5 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Well Mack, I based all my remarks on life here in Belgium. Gwen isn't really all that common here and 18 people don't live on their own unless they go to university or high school and even then mostly only when school is far away. Granted, that's what the Sue-in-making did, but if I were her mother, and I'd know my daughter doesn't like studying, I wouldn't let her live on her own. Too dangerous. Siany-T, I noticed that too, I'll fix it as soon as I can. ![]() Yeah, it seems immature alright. Luckily for my MST-team, there's only one chapter so far. Aside from that, thanks for the comments, guys.
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| MackenzieW | Dec 10 2008, 09:01 AM Post #6 |
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Resident Time Lady
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True, but that's when the mom had three roads to take: The one you're advocating--keeping her at home, nagging at her and never really letting her realize how serious her attitude is. The other two let her go to that other school--it'll give her independence, let her stretch her wings. One scenario shows she learns that no studying=bad grades=getting kicked out of school. The other one is that she realizes that chain and starts to learn some personal responsibility. Of course, there is the fact this is probably written by a 13 years-old trying to capture the mindset of an 18 years old and will probably glamorize coasting through college. |
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You are the music while the music lasts--T.S. Eliot "Stop the damn texting and pick up a book!"--Grandmama, "The Addams Family" (Musical) "Tomorrow will be better for as long as America keeps alive the ideals of freedom and a better life." —Walt Disney "I wake in the loneliness of sunrise When the deep purple heaven turns blue And start to pray As I pray each day That I’ll hear some word from you I lie in the loneliness of evening Looking out on a silver-flaked sea And ask the moon Oh how soon, how soon Will my love come home to me"--"Loneliness of Evening," Cinderella "Thank you, Lord You have brought us Safe to shore Be our strength and protection ever more. A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire"--Heartland, as performed by Celtic Thunder I'm writing a novel! A Guide to Fanfiction for Dummies! My Little Corner I'm on Book Country! | |
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| Fishpaste | Dec 10 2008, 05:44 PM Post #7 |
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Rising Again
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Length? You don't say someones length? Stupid Suethor. Is height out of fashion now? Can I keep Sesshoumaru? |
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Books contain knowledge. Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Corruption is a crime. Crime never pays. So, if I keep reading, Im gonna go broke! Proud member of the society for the Protection of Neglected Commas (SPNC) | |
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| Refia | Dec 10 2008, 06:10 PM Post #8 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Why would you want that?
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| ~Tio~ | Dec 10 2008, 07:28 PM Post #9 |
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Seer of Visions
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Glad to read a new MST from you And yay, no Bionicle porn ^^Btw, you made a little typo: "artefact" - "artifact". Other than that, I love it ![]() Refia's understanding of what Ignika means is just 0_o . Meaning weird and funny at the same time. All the riffs were funny, especially I liked this one:
And "This Sesshoumaru" again :lol: I know that it was in the anime, but still cracks me up XD The ending of the chapter was kinda sudden. I expected the author to write at least something... Well, what can I say, Suethors are Suethors :rolleyes: Keep up the good work, Refia ![]() Edit:
Looks like we have a new Sesshoumaru fangirl But don't worry, HATI, I'll give you a mini of him once I find one (don't know any big scary monsters of the fandom ^^""")
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| Fishpaste | Dec 10 2008, 08:53 PM Post #10 |
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Rising Again
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Yay! Mini Sesshoumaru! |
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Books contain knowledge. Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Corruption is a crime. Crime never pays. So, if I keep reading, Im gonna go broke! Proud member of the society for the Protection of Neglected Commas (SPNC) | |
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| Refia | Dec 11 2008, 02:24 PM Post #11 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Next chapter is up guys. It's the last one, seeing as this is all there is of this 'story' so far. And I don't know if she will still update or if I will MST it if she does update. Depends on the replies I get for this chapter. |
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| jules14 | Dec 11 2008, 04:05 PM Post #12 |
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(Wo)man on a Mission
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*sigh* Why do Suethors always post their fantasies online? I'll admit I have my own escapism fantasies and guilty pleasures, but I keep them locked up where they belong--IN MY HEAD. Because I, at least, realize that no one is interested in them, and that some of them would make people sick to boot. Also, what is wrong with Suethors, that they would trade in their uneventful but safe lives for the opportunity to be thrown headlong into a dangerous war and almost get killed at every turn?! Honestly, if they want that kind of excitement so badly, they should go fight in Iraq. After barely one hour, they'd be singing a very different tune. The last irritating thing about the fic is based entirely on my own personal opinions: the fact that Legolas is ALWAYS the one that Suethors go for. I have never been an Orlando Bloom fan, and I think he looks downright awful in his Legolas costume and wig: so effeminate and fruity. But that's just me. |
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| Refia | Dec 11 2008, 04:42 PM Post #13 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Amen, Jules, Amen. I agree Legolas is overloved. Hell, if it weren't for Orlandu Bloom I bet no Suethor would have even heard of him. After MSTing this I'm inclined to say you were right and that this was a troll. Nobody can spell that horrible except on purpose. |
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| ~Tio~ | Dec 11 2008, 05:09 PM Post #14 |
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Seer of Visions
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Well, nice new chapter and a fast update Quite rare, I must say.However, I've noticed some mistakes:
"Spelling" is how you write words. "Grammar" is word order, tenses, word formation and so on. Aside from that, good work I really like your riffs ![]()
:lol: Loved this one.
Indeed. :lol: And Sesshoumaru + Playstation? LOL XD I'm starting to like him more and more! Let me guess, you're going to do an FF fic later? Since Sesshoumaru can play one of those on the Playstation? Anyway, keep up the good work!
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| MackenzieW | Dec 12 2008, 12:35 AM Post #15 |
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Resident Time Lady
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Looks like someone went to the Angey school of writing.
Okay, I don't think is so much a case of bad grammar. (I agree with Tio. The spelling is correct, it's the grammar she has problems with) I checked BloodyDragoon's profile. She's from Sweden. This was probably run through the Babelfish translator.
Well, usually the people in stories make things happen, not just have it fall in their lap courtesy of their TV.
Umm, what's that?
I do it all the time. Of course, it usually doesn't talk back. But I did it last night when I found out two of my favorite characters on CSI:NY are going to have a baby... |
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You are the music while the music lasts--T.S. Eliot "Stop the damn texting and pick up a book!"--Grandmama, "The Addams Family" (Musical) "Tomorrow will be better for as long as America keeps alive the ideals of freedom and a better life." —Walt Disney "I wake in the loneliness of sunrise When the deep purple heaven turns blue And start to pray As I pray each day That I’ll hear some word from you I lie in the loneliness of evening Looking out on a silver-flaked sea And ask the moon Oh how soon, how soon Will my love come home to me"--"Loneliness of Evening," Cinderella "Thank you, Lord You have brought us Safe to shore Be our strength and protection ever more. A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire"--Heartland, as performed by Celtic Thunder I'm writing a novel! A Guide to Fanfiction for Dummies! My Little Corner I'm on Book Country! | |
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And yay, no Bionicle porn ^^

1:11 AM Jul 11