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| MST: Stuck in Middle earth [REVIEW]; Let it all out here, my friends. | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Aug 1 2009, 07:22 PM (2,745 Views) | |
| Refia | Jun 7 2010, 08:41 PM Post #106 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Unfortunately, I've checked her journal, and the fanfiction.net version has all chapters, while the journal one does not and seemingly quit after chapter 39 or so. ![]()
It wouldn't surprise me, either. I think the Muppets inspired many people to many things. For me, Statler and Waldorf are the grandfathers of sporking, while Mystery Science Theater 3000 is the father of it. ![]()
I send her a PM about it today. It remains to be seen if I get a reply. If I do get one, it will probably be an immature one, with lots of personal attacks to me, belittling me, plugging her fingers in her ears and generally being a typical Suethor of the worst kind. |
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| Maevainwen Adaniel | Jun 7 2010, 09:31 PM Post #107 |
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Master of the Rings
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KERMIT!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU REFIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :lol:
Another department to call? Boo Yeah!!
HaHa! Nice Branar . . . poor Gandalf . . .
Ah, but what was it thinking? How to get laid by every totally hawt!!1! member of the fellowship?
Can. Someone. PLEASE. Murder. Me. Now?Oh my fucking gods . . . she spent nearls half the chapter describing what it felt like to be dirty? and then she felt in necessary to inform us that her bathwater was - shock horror - cold! . . . freezing even? Doesn't she get that we don't give a fuck about that??
She only paid attention to the scenes where she could drool over Legolas
Hear hear
The sue? A parent? and how can she try understand that . . . so many of my families friends have lost kids and I still can't empathise with it :angry:
Heyy, nice alliteration there <_< or was that just repetition . . . I've forgot :ph43r:
I can so see that . . . :lol: Oh gods Refie . . . how the fuck did you survive that? *hands over barrels of Miruvodka and Dorwinion* Congrats for seeing it through |
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If I promise not to kill you can I have a hug? My favorite thing about eating gummy bears is that they don't fight back when bite their heads off Teddies don't hug back, but sometimes they're all you have... Joker: You know, there are three kinds of people in this world. The optomistic that find the glass half full, and the pessimistic that see it as half empty. Then there's the paranoid, and they just think someone's drinking out of their glass. Corrigan: Huh, then which one are you? Joker: I'm the one who knocks the glass over. ~ The Joker Blogs. | |
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| Jedi Master Luthien | Jun 7 2010, 11:45 PM Post #108 |
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Future Egyptologist
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Yay for Kermit the Frog!!! ![]()
That's it. She's going DOWN. ![]()
GAH!! ![]()
I don't blame them. OOH! They could have gotten the water so hot that she boiled to death! That would have been... nice. :lol:
Amen.
Wouldn't put it past her... *shudders*
Round of applause for Branar!
:lol:
And they definitely deserved it. Nice job, Refie!! I can't believe you survived that... *sends Lipton Iced Tea and brain bleach*
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| Xaja Silversheen | Jun 8 2010, 12:04 AM Post #109 |
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King of Nothing
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Oh. Dear. Valar. There was a good point to this though... KERMIT!!! ![]()
Actually, it's kinda expected that the body would be there- Wait, it's not the Sue's. Damn.
A look with a point, evidently. Too bad said point isn't enough to kill the Sue. Wait... I swear that made sense in my head. Moving on...
:lol: That's great! I wonder if they know the number for the Death Star...
You have none, Sue, except to die in the slowest, most brutal way possible. NEXT!
Ahem. Ex-CUSE ME?! Right. Gimli has passed Legolas in my list of favourite LOTR characters.
Actually, it's in the blood.
*OOC alarms go off* OWW!! *rubs ears*
*scratches head and tries to make sense of that sentence before shrugging and giving up*
I hear ya. Why waste that time doing the Sue a courtesy?
Prissy little wimp. She probably has never been that dirty in her life, the wuss.
It's also kinda horrendous that Eowyn would be described with that kind of language, Sue.
AMEN! Get over yourself, BRAT!
Why disgrace the poor guy in death by having a Sue at his funeral?
Can I hit her? Can I? Canicanicani?! ![]()
OI! SPELL IT RIGHT! It's 'Hallelujah', dammit! :angry:
:lol: Why doesn't Las Vegas ever call the Death Star? *grumbles* Kudos for suriving, Refie! *hands over Miruvodka(tm), rum and double-chocolate brownies in large amounts* And I'll take the next unclaimed chapter, whichever that is... |
| The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me? ~Hebrews 13:6 | |
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| Destined Darkness | Jul 3 2010, 04:39 AM Post #110 |
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Master of the Rings
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Awesome Arya! *sends a survival kit to Arya's team*
Totally ruined that quote for me and I say it about 5 times each day! *sigh*I feel sorry for your team! And I feel extra sorry for Thranduil! He has to spork it in my spork group and in yours! :lol:
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'Do you know how some families fight and shout and curse each other, but at the end of the day they're still your family and you're with them to the end of the world because you love them and they love you?' 'Well, yeah...' 'My family isn't like that.' ~Jareth to Sarah, Roommates Comic by AsheRhyder 'Imagine a sound, too deep to hear, too deep to be anything but felt. Deep enough to shatter worlds. That is the sound of the grief of the people who live in "if," those beautiful, terrible people who can be anything and everything as long as they are Nothing. Imagine what can make "nothing" feel so deeply that it may even transcend to "something."' ~Roommates Comic by AsheRhyder | |
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| Jedi Master Luthien | Jul 3 2010, 09:22 AM Post #111 |
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Future Egyptologist
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Oh, gosh. It just keeps getting stupider, doesn't it? ![]()
Pigs must be flying...
GAH! The mental images! They burnsss us, precious!
*pulls out her little "Go Rohan" banner* ![]()
:lol: Nice one, Glorfindel! ![]()
I don't like them, either.
Well, you know the old saying: You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar. Better get the flyswatter ready.
Heh. We wish.
Unless they were playing flashlight tag. That's a fun game... oh, wait. Flashlights don't exist in Middle-earth.
They only wish they could be that awesome. Yay for Glorfindel!! ![]()
Does this mean Sam's about the size of a Barbie doll? Great job, Arya! I don't blame you for running out of jokes. There's only so much you can say about this kind of stupidity. *sends goody basket and a lot of brain bleach* |
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| Arya Svit-Kona | Jul 3 2010, 09:30 AM Post #112 |
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Resident Nutcase
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Thank you, thank you! *takes a bow* It's funny, in the end it was ten pages and about 2,000 words longer than it originally was. That was the worst fic I've ever sporked. |
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One part fool, three parts brave-Brom in the Eragon movie It's better to ask forgiveness than permission-Brom and Eragon in the Eragon movie A red sun rises, blood has been spilt this night-Legolas, The Two Towers God is great Life is good Oh, and Legolas rules | |
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| Refia | Jul 5 2010, 05:01 PM Post #113 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Especially Shadow08, the arrogant piece of shit she is. Yes, I'm being rude and insulting, AND I GIVE NO FUCKING DAMN! I HATE HER!
Don't get your hopes up, she's probably 'pathetic' in a positive way. ![]()
Trying and failing miserably.
Not even proper enough to be polite to, arrogant twit.
Amen! Sam is the rudest, bitchiest Sue ever! Rosa Monroe has got NOTHING on her!
Quoted for truth.
Blodgarm, seriously, SHUT UP!
All those ideas sound lovely, actually.
Alas. ![]()
Aren't tomatoes vegetables? And didn't Sam, Merry and Pipin eat some in the first movie on Amon Sûl?
Yeah, the real Legolas would kill her without a second thought.
You have no idea... ![]()
Suethors: Name generator? What is that? How hot is he? Lolz!1! :lol:
Damn straight, Arya!
Yeah, this story is about as engaging, thrilling and fun to read as Twilight is. It's just page upon page of boring, shitpile Sue "thoughts" and bad action and mush. It totally sucks and I wish Shadow08 would just break down and cry like the pathetic bitch she is, instead of writing this! ![]()
OOC Boromir, duh. :rolleyes:
You have my full support, Thranduil! ![]()
PLEASE! ![]()
First time I've seen the Sue do something good.
To lust over Legolas, make fun of Gimli, kid around with her brother Boromir and berate Aragorn. Oh, and to entertain us with her deep, thoughtful, witty comments, of course. <_<
Thanks Eragon. Thanks Arya.
And don't you forget it, Shadow08, you filthy pile of vomit!
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| Refia | Oct 22 2010, 11:09 AM Post #114 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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*Refie's sporking team comes in* Ace: Hey, we're allowed to review! Mia: Well, this IS our biggest horror slash nightmare. Refia: Who are the brave souls that faced another chapter of this... crap this time?
Branar: *resists the urge to headdesk* Get used to them.
All: ![]() Vanille: Seriously, though, guys, don't get your hopes up.
Ace: Eh, just go with it.
Mia: This'll be the least of your worries, trust me. I know from first-hand experience.
Branar: Told you so.
Sesshoumaru: Do not be ridiculous. Of course you can not.
All: Mia: *screams* She did not! Vanille: *sighs* She did. Refia: A joke chapter? What's this world coming to?Ami: What world? The apocalypse has clearly begun.
Ace: Meh, like I said, just go with it. *bored*
Branar: Hold your rocksteeds. Lesson one you've all got to learn about "Stuck in Middle earth": the Sue is NOT self-aware. She's pretentious, obnoxious, annoying, void of any personality, has no sense of empathy, is rude, bitchy, stinking, crappy, shitty, is ego-centric, goes into stupid mind-rambles way too often then thinks she's having 'deep thoughts', has no coherent form of thoughts whatsoever and in short is incapable of any kind of thoughtful act, let alone be self-aware! :angry: Ace: Breath, Branar, breath. Branar: *glares at Ace* <_< Mia: He summed it up nicely, though.
Ami: I agree! The Egyptian gods were very interesting. Refie: *pops in* I agree, too! Refia: Who are you? Refie: Just your author. Refia: Oh. Refie: *pops out*
Sesshoumaru: *irritated* Yes, she is. Again, this Sesshoumaru might add. Ace: We've seen em all, those rants, aye matey, we have. Mia: Just stop it Ace, you may be a pirate, but "arr!" talk doesn't suit you. Ace: Thought I'd try. *shrugs*
All: SOMETHING TO GET RID OF THAT BLOODY AWEFUL SUE!
Ami: It is not as if Shadow01, the 'author', would know who that is.
Refia: In all honesty, that would be much, much more entertaining than anything in this fic.
All: You did read it. Branar: Congratulations, you have just come to experience first hand what we have to deal with EVERY BLOODY CHAPTER OF THIS SHITPILE. Ace: Oi, oi, Branar, watch your language. Mia: He's loosing his cool, isn't he?
Ace: *yawns* Try forever.
Refia: Don't expect Shadow01 to be aware of that. Her knowledge of canon, or of Lord of the Rings for that matter, stops at the character's names and Legolas' hotness. Everything after that is copied from the movies. The few 'original' scenes suck mayor balls.
Mia: Point Mac.
Ami: *face burried in her hands* Hard to believe, but no.
Refia: Let's see... This is chapter 16, and in chapter 46, which she wrote YEARS later - I'm not kidding, that's actually true - it's still just as bad. So, short answer: no, we can't.
All: *offer desks* Headdesk with us?
Mia: Hey, there's an original idea to pass time. Thanks for the suggestion, guys! Mastermind: There will be no newspaper-reading during sporking sessions. Ace: Bitch. Mastermind: Well I'm sorry, but it stands in my "evil overlord contract": thou shall not let your sporkers read newspapers.
Branar: If I'd say there's a big chance the answer to your question will be "no", would you believe me?
Vanille: Yes, it's funny the first few times, but when you have to deal with paragraph after paragraph, chapter after chapter with nonsense such as this, you really will start to cry and wish to go kill yourself. Mia: It's that Mastermind removed all sharp objects from the theatre, you see...
Refia: I think you just killed the Sue. Party!
All: *scratch their chins* Hmm, this'll be interesting... Mia: They got their first taste of Sam the Terrible's astrocious level of bitchiness, how will they react?
Vanille: Don't hold it, girl, just let it all out. We're the reason Mastermind had to double the sound-proof isolation of the theatre, so go ahead, vent out your anger, this theatre can take it! *rubs her hands in glee*
Refie: *pops in* This drove Jules up the wall, too, you know, Mac. Fic's full of shit like this, too. *pops out* All: *applaud* Beautiful! Excellent! Wonderful! Best vent of anger we've seen in ages! ![]() Vanille: Can I have your autograph?
All: *grab Remus* Now don't you be a spoilsport.
Ace: Point Quatre.
Ami: Let's not and say that we did? We have had to call it so much already that its sirens will drive me crazy if I hear them one more time.
All: *pat Mac's team encouragingly on the back* There, there, you're almost done. We have to do the other 30 chapters.
Branar: I think Eru would like a word with you about that, Sue.
All: Good sporking! Mia: Let's give these brave souls an applause. They deserve it, after surviving this. All: But in all honesty, yes, great work, Mac. Hope you kind of see why I hate this fic so much now.
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| MackenzieW | Oct 22 2010, 10:39 PM Post #115 |
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Resident Time Lady
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It was "teaser." But when she wrote the real chapter, the idiot didn't replace the teaser with it. Like most people would.
I think some people need Dr. Stone's number...
I'm sure. You're only preaching to the choir. We did sit through 39 mind-numbing chapters of "Two Hearts, One Soul."
Mac: Um...Sure? Thank you for the applause. And honestly, while she did bring out a rant, that was fun to MST. I tend to go for stories where, if they would put in a little more effort and ditch the Sue, the author would be a very good writer. This one has no hope, which makes it easier to mock! |
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You are the music while the music lasts--T.S. Eliot "Stop the damn texting and pick up a book!"--Grandmama, "The Addams Family" (Musical) "Tomorrow will be better for as long as America keeps alive the ideals of freedom and a better life." —Walt Disney "I wake in the loneliness of sunrise When the deep purple heaven turns blue And start to pray As I pray each day That I’ll hear some word from you I lie in the loneliness of evening Looking out on a silver-flaked sea And ask the moon Oh how soon, how soon Will my love come home to me"--"Loneliness of Evening," Cinderella "Thank you, Lord You have brought us Safe to shore Be our strength and protection ever more. A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire"--Heartland, as performed by Celtic Thunder I'm writing a novel! A Guide to Fanfiction for Dummies! My Little Corner I'm on Book Country! | |
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| Refia | Oct 22 2010, 10:42 PM Post #116 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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It would be easier to mock if the suethor wasn't such an asshole who makes fun of people giving her not flames, but constructive criticism! 46 chapters of this shit is just too much.
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| jules14 | Oct 22 2010, 10:59 PM Post #117 |
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(Wo)man on a Mission
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Great job, Mac. You covered the chapter that I hate the most. And I'm surprised at how calm you were about Eowyn; I would have had an attack of apoplexy.
Don't get your hopes up, Erik. It won't last long.
I bet Voldemort would be happy to help!
"And don't give me any of that 'You jump, I jump' crap!"
Sadly, she doesn't stay self-aware for long.
Oh, thanks, Suethor, now I've got "My Humps" stuck in my head.
Yep. He just realized he was being paired with the Sue in this fic.
*twitching* At least the Sue didn't start singing it.
Yes, He does. At least you haven't managed to warp Him out of character.
JULES (losing control): STOP INSULTING GIMLI! HE'S ONE OF THE BEST CHARACTERS IN THE BOOKS, YOU SHALLOW LITTLE TWIT!
I'd downgrade it to preschool if I were you. Seriously; "See Spot Run" has more sophisticated prose.
Exactly what I would have said, except with less Caps Lock abuse, exclamation point abuse, cursing, death threats to the Sue, and rage. Thanks a lot, Mac. Is my turn next? |
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| Refia | Oct 22 2010, 11:10 PM Post #118 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Yes, Jules, you can take the next chapter if you want.
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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| MackenzieW | Oct 23 2010, 12:36 AM Post #119 |
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Resident Time Lady
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Yeah, we have to second that.
Voldemort: Absolutely! *Breaks out book* Let's start with number 21.
Oh, now I do too.
Thanks, but it's been easier since the rant against how Rora couldn't act like a victim when she thought she heard her daughter scream and DID NOTHING FOR THIRTY MINUTES! Good luck, Jules, and thanks for the review! |
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You are the music while the music lasts--T.S. Eliot "Stop the damn texting and pick up a book!"--Grandmama, "The Addams Family" (Musical) "Tomorrow will be better for as long as America keeps alive the ideals of freedom and a better life." —Walt Disney "I wake in the loneliness of sunrise When the deep purple heaven turns blue And start to pray As I pray each day That I’ll hear some word from you I lie in the loneliness of evening Looking out on a silver-flaked sea And ask the moon Oh how soon, how soon Will my love come home to me"--"Loneliness of Evening," Cinderella "Thank you, Lord You have brought us Safe to shore Be our strength and protection ever more. A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire A Thiarna dean trocaire A Chriost dean trocaire"--Heartland, as performed by Celtic Thunder I'm writing a novel! A Guide to Fanfiction for Dummies! My Little Corner I'm on Book Country! | |
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| Refia | Dec 13 2010, 10:30 PM Post #120 |
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Paying Tribute to the Past
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Aah, a wonderful choice of sporkers. And Semirhage summed it up pretty simply and to the point.
Yes, Jules, it's going to suck major ass.
She lacks the brainpower to do that.
Get used to it guys, the chapter will be pretty much the same as what you've just read: pointless, ass-sucking drivel.
I've been wondering about that many times, and have come to the conclusion that: yes, it is, and she succeeds in it without any effort.
Bad, baaad Morgoth. ![]()
Good theory there. Morgoth seems to aprove. ![]()
*hands Morgoth a blank paper* There, a list of things she doesn't fail at.
Simple: nobody in this fic has any common sense or is even 0,00000000000001% in character.
*Pats Jules on the back in sympathy* There, there, just one chapter and you're done. I have to put up with the remaining 30.
Refie's sporker: YES! DO IT!!! ![]() Refie: Hush, all of you, go back in my head. <_<
Bravo, Boris, you summed up the Sue's brainpower in one sentence.
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Girls, you deserve a medal. *hands over a medal for each of em*
Again, I hate to say it, but: get used to it. She does it all the fucking time, Morgoth.
You have to actually have a brain to do that, though, Boris.
Oh, if only, if only! ![]()
Ouch, someone's bitter.
*gives Morgoth a suicide pistol* Help yourself.
Good questions, to which the Suethors can give no logical answer since they lack the brainpower to even understand your question in the first place. ![]()
:angry: Sailor Moon could smite this sue with the polished nail of her little toe! (Even if, granted, she could be annoying at times.)
No, no sensors, go all out, this piece of dung deserves it!
Keep your head, Jules.
Can we just write a fic "How stuck in middle-earth should have ended?" in which we kill the Sue in every chapter in the most in-canon and brutal of ways? Please? ![]()
Jules, no she doesn't. Morgoth, yes he should.
WHAT INTELLIGENCE?!
Don't try to get it either, you'll only get a headache. *rubs head from all the headwalling*
*Refie's running around in circles screaming his head off and thus can not comment. Pardon us for the inconvenience.*
I'm sure she did.
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We'll do it gladly, even! ![]()
That was painfully acurate, Morgoth.
Who is she trying to fool here, anyway?
*Hopefully:* Maybe they'd die! ![]()
Nice ones, guys! ![]()
It's funny when you say it, but it's so horrible in it's truthfulness!
See? See why I hate this fic so goddamn much?! ![]()
She's worse than ALL SUES IN THE UNIVERSE COMBINED INTO ONE!
She's lying, ain't it obvious?
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I lol'd. ![]()
So funny! ![]()
The fic. ![]()
No! Get back under that seat and hide from this shitpile!
Also, Sue, please note that we can actually think. An activity you are not capable of performing, since you lack a fucking BRAIN.
You'd have more success convincing a wall to paint itself.
Morgoth, that was pure poetry.
*Refie's singing* Why, Lord, why Tell me why Your the only light Forever lasting Tell me, father, why
The space and time continuum, for starters.
Indeed. If you didn't have the brain of a retarded dog turd you'd know that, Sue!
I wish, Boris. I wish it so badly. ![]()
I'd rather read that than this pile of vomit! ![]()
You know there's something WRONG with this fic when the badguys start convincing you with well-argued points.
SHE HAS NO INTELLIGENCE AT ALL! ![]()
*Deadpan:* Mithril. :mellow:
As bad as the & Phantom's Ange used!
Muahahahahahahahaaaa!!! I'm loving it.
WHY DID YOU DO THAT FOR?! LET HER RAGE! THE WORLD MUST KNOW OUR RAGE! WE MUST RAGE AND - ![]() *One of Refie's sporkers hits Refie on the head with a club and knocks him out* Ace: Why is he getting all worked up? WE are the ones reading this. Mia: Beats me. I hope you didn't hit too hard.
*Refie wakes up.* Ooh, my head, what happened? *sees everyone's reaction* Oh, I agree, I agree! DRASTIC MEASURES! PLEASE! ![]()
*Gives Jules a drink* Here, you look like you need it.
Shadow08 sucks at suspence. ![]()
Shadow08 makes the impossible possible when it comes to rage. ![]()
Don't remind me. ![]()
If she'd come to realise this, it would already be a massive improvement, but SHE JUST DOESN'T GET IT AND LAUGHS IN THE FACE OF WHOEVER TRIES TO HELP HER. I WANT TO PRINT THIS FIC AND FORCE HER TO EAT EVERY FUCKING PAGE. ![]()
You can't mention it enough, as far as I'm concerned.
All of the above. ![]()
Yeowch, that was hard.
This is the point where yo udrop whatever faith in humanity you had left, Morgoth. I did it.
If Morgoth says so, it means a lot. Thanks for doing this chapter, Jules, it was a great read! ![]() Now it's my turn again... I don't wanna...
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[align=center]“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” [/align] | |
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Can. Someone. PLEASE. Murder. Me. Now?
and how can she try understand that . . . so many of my families friends have lost kids and I still can't empathise with it :angry:


:lol:


*sends a survival kit to Arya's team*
Pigs must be flying...
Better get the flyswatter ready.



What's this world coming to?





3:14 PM Jul 11