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| True Luve; Even the title makes me want to hurl.... | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Aug 17 2010, 09:58 PM (520 Views) | |
| Alya Mírielin | Aug 17 2010, 09:58 PM Post #1 |
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Resident Twomore of Lancaster CTY
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Title: True Luve Author: Alya Mírielin Genre: Humor/MST Text based on: "True Luve" by prinsess of merkwood Rating: T Characters: Alya, Azula, Zuko, and Aragorn, plus the Sue and the antagonist. Summary: Sue gets insulted, runs off, ends up in Arda. Warnings: You might not be able to read if your inner grammar Nazi even exists. Azula: *pushes everyone into the theater and locks the door* There! Zuko: AZULA, WHEN WE GET OUT OF HERE... Alya: Oh, shut it. We're stuck in here anyway. *pulls out Wizard's First Rule* Azula: *unlocks the door and incinerates Alya's book, then closes and locks the door again* Alya: NOO! ![]() Azula: Today you'll be sporking True Luve! Everyone: *sighs and sits down* It all started out as a normal day at skool. Alya: That looks nothing like a disclaimer. Zuko: What's skool? Aragorn: Clearly it's something we've never heard of. i was siting at lnch wen Velma davies cam up ro me an seed "You r rely ugly u no that?" Zuko: Azula! You gave us the wrong language! This isn't English! Azula: It's English. Alya: ![]() That if corse wuz not true! I wus in fact verry beautiful! Alya: If corse? What's an if corse? Aragorn: Beats me. ![]() i am 5'10" an have raven black heir. Aragorn: She has a black heir? Why does it matter? Zuko: How can someone in school have an heir? I wuz actually namd after mu hair. Alya: Where did she say anything about her hair? Aragorn: Dunno. Zuko: *has started blasting the door with fire* My nme is Raven. anyway, im also very skiny ad most girlz think that i am anerexic but im nut! Alya: Yes, you are a nut. Zuko: Hazelnut? ![]() Aragorn: We're still talking about the girl here. Zuko: What?! *looks at the screen* Azula, are you SURE this is English? Alya: Most of the words aren't in the dictionary. All the girlz at skool dont lyk me becuz they're jealous an all th boys want 2 go out wif me. Alya: Is there one sentence here that doesn't involve mind-numbing spelling? Zuko: FATHER! I THINK YOU'RE A BAD LEADER! Aragorn: What are you doing? Zuko: Maybe if I get more scars I won't be able to see the screen! Alya: *to Aragorn* He and his Adar have bad history. ![]() I also have violet eyes wich nobdy else has. Alya: SUE!!!!!!! Zuko: What? Alya: Sue. <_< That day i was weering a black leather mini scirt with fishnet tights and a tight partially see though blood red shirt. Alya: Yessss, Velma stabbed her? ![]() Aragorn: Umm...no. Her shirt was already red. Alya: Damn. <_< Zuko: Scirt? Alya: Weering? Ive sen sum poople wear that an look ugly but i cud neva luk ugly! Zuko: Poople could be taken as an offense. <_< Alya: You cud neva luk ugly? *sighs* Pass around the brain bleach. Azula: No bleach! Alya: ![]() Aragorn: Careful you don't hurt yourself. Zuko: *aside to Aragorn* I think that's what she's trying to do. Anyway aft Velma seed that i said "i am nut! you're jet jelous because your ugly!11!" Aragorn: Yes, you're a nut too. Alya: Wait a minute, did Raven ever say anything to Velma? Zuko: Nope. Alya: Great, telepaths. ![]() Aragorn: Stray 11. An then i ran out cryung. i ran in2 te woods behind my skool but i eventually trppied on a root and fel 2 the ground. Alya: How many grounds are there? Zuko: I think she means she fell down. Aragorn: In2? Some kind of code name? ![]() i lay there crying 4 a while an eventually fell asleep. wen i woke up the sun wuz streaming thru the trees. Alya: You fell asleep. Aragorn: In the woods. Zuko: After tripping over a root. Alya: And lay there crying. Aragorn: Over something silly. Zuko: And pointless. All: SPARKLEPIRE LOVER!! i mustve slept 4 a long time i thought. I headed back 2 skool bt i couldn't find it! Alya: You slept for a long time, and the sun's still up? Zuko: Wait, how can she go back to school but not be able to find it? Aragorn: Excessive stupidity. It's right in front of her, you see, but she can't see it. i was lost in da woods!11! i started cruing again. i hadn cried tis much since mu pedants died. Alya: Okay, she crues. Aragorn: How do pedants die? Zuko: What ARE pedants? Alya: Beats me, guys.Aragorn: Plus, there's a stray 11. Again. sUdenly i herd a crackle ov twigs an jumped up. A beautiful man cam thru the bushes. At lest i thout he wuz a man until i saw is ears. he wuz a elf. Alya: How do you herd a crackle ov twigs? Zuko: Easy. You step on a large group of twigs. Aragorn: Oh Valar, please tell me the elf isn't who I think it is. Alya: Let's hope so... For sum reason he looked familiar. Then i reelized tat it was Legolas Aragorn: NOOO!! What have they done to you, mellonamin? Alya: *sigh* (AN: Of course it wus Legolas! He's so hot!11)! Alya: You do not deserve to type the name Legolas. <_< Aragorn: Stray -- Zuko: We get it. Aragorn: 11. Zuko: Grrr.... Alya: ![]() i was n lord of the rings! Alya: No, you were in Sweeney Todd. Of course you were in Lord of the Rings, you buffle-headed dumbbell! Naomi's voice somehow traveling from several hundred miles and a few fandoms away: Hey! Buffle-headed dumbbell is my line! Alya: ![]() Zuko: :rolleyes: Legolas cam up 2 me an said "watt is a beautiful lady such as yorself doin in te midle od the wood?" Alya: Nooo, don't do it! She's a Sue! Aragorn: Please tell me this isn't happening! Zuko: Beautiful? "i dont know" I said. "I waz in te forest outsid my house and i fell asleep. i woke up here." I lookd up into hiz face and coulddnt tear mu gaze away. He was jus so hansome. Alya: I thought you just came from school. Aragorn: She's a teleporting Sue. <_< Alya: Get out while you can, Legolas. "Where r u from?" Legolas asked me. "From Riverdale?" Aragorn: RIVENDELL! Alya: *sighs* We know. "i am no elf. how coud I be frum there?" Alya: Calling you an elf would be an insult to Elves everywhere. Aragorn: She doesn't even deserve to be called an Orc! <_< "You look like a elf to me." a elf? i reechoed up to tuch mu eery an they wer indead pointed. Alya: What's an eery? Aragorn: I think it's plural. Alya: What are eery? Zuko: This is torture. <_< "Come wit me to Riverdae. I am heeded ther to atend a secret counsil." Legolas said. Alya: What an idiotic Suethor! Elven princes don't just invite people who appear randomly out of mid-air to secrel councils! ![]() Aragorn: Wait till Legolas hears about this... Azula: All right, you're done for today! Alya: Wait, what? Aragorn: What kind of chapter ending was that? Zuko: Whoever wrote that must be both eight years old and woefully undereducated. ![]() All: *exit* (Review here) |
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| Alya Mírielin | Aug 19 2010, 12:26 PM Post #2 |
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Resident Twomore of Lancaster CTY
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Azula: *drags everyone into the theater* Aragorn: NO! I will NOT go through this again! *runs for the door* Azula: *closes and locks the door* Too bad! You're doing it! All: <_< *take a seat* A/N: I hat u flamrs!1111! Aragorn: Stray 1111. Alya: Well, who said we wanted you to like us? Zuko: We don't need Suethors to like us! Aragorn: We also don't need Legolas-destroyers to like us. mu stor is gret! Alya: Sure it is. ![]() Aragorn: Gret? Zuko: Don't ask. You're al jus men flmers whu cant rite!11! Alya: Hey, I'm a girl! Aragorn: And we can....why would we have a rite? Zuko: No more rites. Had enough of them with father. Aragorn: Oh, and stray 11. i don ned a beta! Alya: Either you're reluctant to admit you're wrong.... Aragorn: Or you're the stupidest being in existence. Zuko: I like Aragorn's option. u jus h8 my stry becuz youre stoys r horibl!11! Aragorn: Stray 11. And are you going to flame us or write your story? Alya: I'd rather read her insults than her story. Wen they reched Riverdall leogols lifted Raven of od his hors. Alya: And left her there with the marauding gang of Orcs. Aragorn: We wish. <_< Zuko: No Orcs in Rivendell. *beat* Oh sorry, RIVERDALL. ![]() lord Elroad came ou 2 greet the. Aragorn: And stabbed the Sue through the heart. Alya: Don't we all want that. <_< "Welcom 2 Revandell mu laid!" he sad. "We hac been waiting 4 u. cum Awen wil show u 2 your rum." Alya: Elrond speaks text? Aragorn: He most certainly does not! Zuko: Somehow I don't think he'd actually associate that....WORD with his daughter. Alya: They have rum in Rivendell? *is thinking about things associated with rum* Zuko: Apparently. Aragorn: We most certainly do not! *beat* We all know what you're thinking, Alya. Alya: ![]() "i'll c u later then Legolas" I siad. i folowed aren 2 my room. Aragorn: It's ARWEN! Alya: After reading a certain series with the name Aren in it, I'm pretty sure you can't follow a ring. It wuz beautiful!1! it was bigger tha anu other beroom i had evr been in! Aragorn: And it concealed Gollum, who thought you had the Ring. Oh, and stray 1. I flopped don on te bed. i was socked! Alya: Who's don? Zuko: Why is she talking about mafia? Aragorn: There are no mafia gangs in Rivendell! I hadnt expekted th bes her 2 b so soft. Alya: The best her is soft? Aragorn: Should we know what that means? It was th sofest bed i had ever been in! i ten saw te dreser. Aragorn: Please let the bed be quicksand! Alya: And the dresser was full of scorpions. Zuko: Wishful thinking. I opned it an looked inside. it wuz ful od beautiful elfish dreses! Alya: Snooping in other people's dressers? Aragorn: Not nice. I emediatly wanted 2 try one on. Alya: Trying on other people's clothes? Aragorn: Insane. I pulled out a forrest gren 1. It fit perfecly! Alya: *bored voice* You're a Sue. Everything fits you. Aragorn: Get outta that dress. It wus sim in da waste an had a seer puff seaves. Alya: They have SIMS in Imladris? Aragorn: Whats? Alya: Never mind. Zuko: You're a waste, not the dress. Alya: Seer puff seaves? Aragorn: Obviously the seaves had second sight. ![]() it had pattens od levees on the boddice. Alya: Do you even know what a bodice is? Aragorn: Levees? Alya: *starts singing* So bye-bye miss American Pie Drove my chevy to the levee but the levee was dry And good old boys were drinkin' whiskey and rye Singin' "this'll be the day that I die". Ross's voice from several hundred miles and a few fandoms away: STOP SINGING AMERICAN PIE ALREADY! Alya: *shouts back* SHUT UP, I'M SPORKING! Ther waz a greeen beeded belt were te bodise an the skert od the dresss connected. Alya: I thought you said it was a bodice, now it's a bodise? Aragorn: Of course the skirt connected. That's why it's called a dress and not a skirt and shirt! there was a liter green stripe od fsbric don te cener of the script. wit darke gren ob the otsid. Alya: I don't understand a word you're saying. Aragorn: She's saying that the green stripe has a script. Zuko: And Astrid got a grenade...wait, that doesn't sound right. Alya: ![]() A few minute latter aRWEN came. Se tol mu tat it waz time 4 the counsil. Alya: Didn't the council happen in the "grey morning"? Aragorn: Yup. we wlked ootside to the meeeting plac. Awen ten left. Alya: Real descriptive. ![]() Legolas beackoned mr 2 a seet nex 2 him. i came an sat down. Aragorn: On one of Legolas' knives, I hope. Elong ten stared speeking. Strangers form didn't lans freds od old…. i tunned owt. Alya: Oi, that part's important! Aragorn: It's lyk, to borng 4 da Sue! Zuko: Ugh, PLEASE! It's already bad enough without you doing it too! I did so nil gimi da stuid dwarve gut up an treed 2 mash da rin. Alya: Stupid dwarf killed 43 Orcs at Helm's Deep. Conclusion, he cannot be stupid. Aragorn: He didn't tree to mash the Ring, he tried to break it. Then evrybody tarted yelling. i finaly too up an seed "Shut up!11! al dis aging wll get uz nowhere!111!" Alya: You seeded something? Aragorn: Stray 111. Zuko: Aging will get us nowhere? Alya: It's getting you older. Aragorn: :rolleyes: "Food te hobbit ten stood up and said "i will tak te rin 2 moror!" Alya: While Hobbits do indeed enjoy food, I don't think there's a Hobbit named Food. Aragorn: Moror? Alya: One does not simply walk in and eat Maror. Ganlaf, Legolas, arargon, boomomir an i ten joined the quest. Aragorn: Ganlaf? Alya: Boomomir? *snickers* Ten da hobbits ran up an seead tehy waned 2 jon 2. Elonder aloud teem 2 cum. Alya: Yes, but they didn't ask for that. They wanted to go on the Quest! i new they woud b useless though. Alya: You, Suethor, do NOT deserve to write fanfiction! ![]() Aragorn: Right, so the King of Rohan, White Lady of Rohan, and Faramir don't matter. <_< "Ten communions. you all b te fellowship od te rinnnd!" Alya: You can spell "fellowship" right, and yet you can't spell companions or Ring? Aragorn: Communions? I don't think so. "Ten communions. you all b te fellowship od te rinnnd!" NO MOOORE FLAMRS!111! Alya: FLAMEFLAMEFLAME!!!! Aragorn: *bored voice* Stray 111. Azula: And that's the end! All: *run out of the theater* (Review here) |
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3:23 PM Jul 11