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Man Vs Women Battle...; Let it begin...
Topic Started: Jun 28 2005, 02:28 AM (2,463 Views)
flemse
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Wise man. Are you going over to the power team????? Naaaa i dont think so..... Hehe. Carmen dont think you can change us men..... (OOO)

Q. What is the difference between "Oooh!" and "Aaah!"?
A. About three inches
(devil)
Flemse
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kasaalf
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Wise man, I don't go over to the power team. I havent got enough power in my old body
to join a power team. (lol)
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flemse
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Quote:
 
Wise man, I don't go over to the power team. I havent got enough power in my old body
to join a power team. (lol)


Ohhh you are a strong powerful man wise man.... (bow) (bow)
Flemse
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flemse
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Girl: Do you believe in puppy love?
Boy: I tried it once, but their assholes are too small.

Hahahahahaha
Flemse
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flemse
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Can i call you an engel

The snow fell, leaving a halo of white upon your head,
and that's when I said,
"Can I call you Angel?"

You looked at me with surprise,
but I could see it in your eyes,
and I knew.

As you sang silent night,
your beautiful voice put me at ease,
and I asked please,
"Can I call you Angel?"

A smile came to your face with serenity and grace,
but you said not a word.
In my darkest hours you held my hand,
never leaving my side, and I said, while I cried,
"Can I call you Angel? "

You then began to wipe the tears away
and erase all the gray in my life.
You led me down a path of gold,
telling me of the creator above,
and again I asked with a greater love,
"Can I call you Angel?"

You never answered my plea,
so I fell to my knee in prayer.
As I opened my eyes, I could see you before me;
Your wings spread and a golden halo upon your head
and one last time I said,
"Carmen, can I call you Angel?"
(wink)
Flemse
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WorkingMom
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flemse
Sep 8 2005, 07:37 AM
Can i call you an engel

The snow fell, leaving a halo of white upon your head,
and that's when I said,
"Can I call you Angel?"

You looked at me with surprise,
but I could see it in your eyes,
and I knew.

As you sang silent night,
your beautiful voice put me at ease,
and I asked please,
"Can I call you Angel?"

A smile came to your face with serenity and grace,
but you said not a word.
In my darkest hours you held my hand,
never leaving my side, and I said, while I cried,
"Can I call you Angel? "

You then began to wipe the tears away
and erase all the gray in my life.
You led me down a path of gold,
telling me of the creator above,
and again I asked with a greater love,
"Can I call you Angel?"

You never answered my plea,
so I fell to my knee in prayer.
As I opened my eyes, I could see you before me;
Your wings spread and a golden halo upon your head
and one last time I said,
"Carmen, can I call you Angel?"
(wink)

That is beautiful!

Yes you can. (blowkiss)
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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Okay, I have some making up to do. (OOO)


Why do men name their penises?

Because they want to be on a first-name basis with the one who makes all their decisions
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the Olympics?

He had it bronzed *giggle
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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How do some men define Roe vs. Wade?

Two ways to cross a river
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
Wife: You wear briefs, don't you?


What's the difference between a porcupine and a Corvette?
The porcupine has pricks on the outside.

*pointNlaugh
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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How do men sort their laundry?

"Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable".
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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Why did God create man?

Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb?

A.One - men will screw anything.
B.One - men will screw up anything.
C.Five - one to actually do the screwing, four to listen to him brag about it
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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WorkingMom
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How does a man take a bubble bath?

He eats beans for dinner.
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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flemse
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A couple were indulged in sexual intercourse and the man noticed that with each movement of his pelvis, his partner's toes would rise.

Later that night, while going at it pretty hot and heavy in the shower, her toes remained still. Confused, he asked, "Why is it that when we do it in bed, your toes go up, but when we do it in the shower, they don't?"

"Silly," she replied, "I take my pantyhose off in the shower!" (devil)
Flemse
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flemse
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To men dicussing how tight ass cold their wives had been to them about giving sex. The first fellow says "My wife's so cold I can put a glass of water in bed with her and the next morning its turned to ice." The second fellow says "Hell, every time my old lady spreads her legs the furnace kicks in!"

(OOO)
Flemse
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Angelwings
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flemse
Sep 9 2005, 05:06 PM
A couple were indulged in sexual intercourse and the man noticed that with each movement of his pelvis, his partner's toes would rise.

Later that night, while going at it pretty hot and heavy in the shower, her toes remained still. Confused, he asked, "Why is it that when we do it in bed, your toes go up, but when we do it in the shower, they don't?"

"Silly," she replied, "I take my pantyhose off in the shower!" (devil)

*GOOFBALL* lmaooooooooooooooooooooooo
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flemse
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*pointNlaugh Yes she is.... hahahahaha
Flemse
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bucky
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hahaha i dont normally post to the battle of sexes in here but that was funny
thanks

Bucky

ps, i read them all thou

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flemse
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Q. What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
A. 45 lbs.

Q. How do you teach a blond math?
A. Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, and square root her

Q. What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman?
A. Sexual harassment.

Q. What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?
A. $3.99 a minute.

(devil)
Flemse
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bucky
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hahaha last one was the best, hahahaha

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flemse
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Bucky have you seen Carmen... Have i won the battle????? Jubiiiiiii......
The blue engel have won......wooooo (OOO)
Flemse
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velan
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hmmm.. flemse and woman*lol*
Tune in
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bucky
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sorry mate i have not, mind you it looks like your in the lead.

*watches the door, awaits carmen to burst through*
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WorkingMom
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Oh, I don't give up that easy. (OOO)


In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grand motherly elderly woman to the stand.

He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded: "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've know you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never
will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The Lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked: "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied: "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said: "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt
"Friends are like stars ...
they always seem to shine their brightest when the night is at it's darkest."
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