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The Price
Topic Started: Aug 26 2009, 12:26 AM (187 Views)
Havok
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Superheated Plasma Blasts
August 16th
Morning




"Mr. Summers, you've been avoiding me," Samson said, as the young man entered the office.

"I haven't," Alex said, taking his seat behind his desk, glancing quickly at one of the glass frames, to make sure his image inducer was on. The face that stared back was normal, so he was good.

Samson didn't miss the subtle check, but he didn't mention it yet. "My mistake, I guess you're just an incredibly busy man."

"That I am, Doctor," Alex replied, "There's still so much to be done. Hodge sent over approvals for our uniforms and I... have you seen these? I have no idea how we're going to get some of the team to wear them. Belly shirts for the girls."

"You object?" Samson smirked, "I've seen the women on this team. I would pay good money to see them in belly shirts."

Alex chuckled lightly, "Heh, so would I, actually, but I'm engaged, I can't be looking anymore."

"Oh, looking you can do," Samson said, "Looking is healthy. It's the touching that's off limits. Congratulations on the engagement, by the way."

"Thanks, it's still a secret, but doctor - patient privacy, right?" Alex asked.

Samson made a tick-a-lock motion over his lips, "Safe with me, Mr. Summers."

"Alex, please, Mr. Summers makes me think too much of Scott, and I don't know... makes me uncomfortable." Alex said, his voice suddenly serious.

"You don't like your brother?"

"No," Alex said, quickly, "I mean, no, that's not it. I love Scott. But, really what's not to love. He's a good leader, a hero. He has a beautiful wife, a cute daughter. He's perfect in every way and everyone wants to be him or at least be like him..."

"I'm not sure that's true," Samson said, "But since you think so, do you want to be like Scott?"

"Of course," Alex said, "You think Scott would have ended up... doing what I did?"

"Yes I do," the psychologist said, "I do indeed, had the ShadowX incident not been quelled."

Alex stared at the large man, blue eyes wide, "SHIELD knows about that?"

Samson nodded, "They do."

Alex folded his hands in his lap and looked down at them, his expression unreadable, "They know everything. Why don't they stop stuff like this from happening before it happens then? Why do they let... Never mind."

"Go ahead," Samson coaxed.

Alex shook his head, "No, there's no point. I'm just tired, that's all. Tired and over worked and sick of feeling like shit all the time. I'm tired of being angry."

Samson looked at the young man, calmly, without judgment and said, "Don't you think you have a right to be angry. It's not fair, none of it is. You didn't ask to have these powers, you didn't ask to have this life."

"But I did ask to be a Horseman," Alex said, meeting Samson's eyes. "I volunteered for it."

"That's not the whole story," the psychiatrist said.

"That's not the point," Alex snapped, "The point is that I shouldn't have done it. I should have fought harder, I should have taken down Death somehow."

"Could you have?"

"If I blasted him, maybe," Alex said, his voice rising, "If I used all my power and killed him..."

"But Warren Worthington was your friend," Samson reminded.

"That wasn't Warren," the young man said, his anger apparent, "That was Death and if I had just done what I should have done, millions of people would be alive today, millions. I could have fried him dead..."

"But you didn't."

"I thought I could help him," Alex said, bitterly, "I thought maybe if I let what happened to him happen to me I could survive it better because I knew it was going to happen. If I wasn't caught by surprise..."

"And, it was too strong for you," Samson said.

"Yeah, way too strong... I was trying to save Warren, trying to save Lorna... I was trying to do what I thought Scott would...."

"I thought you said Scott wouldn't have let that happen."

"He wouldn't have. He would have fought it. He would have been stronger than I was." Alex clenched his fist and it began to glow white, the heat raising in the room. "He would have saved the world... he did save the world."

Samson shook his head, "Not alone, Alex, he had the help of some of the most powerful people in the world and still, he almost failed. The world was almost lost to your master." He used the term pointedly, seeing how Alex would react to it.

The temperature spiked higher, the fist glowed brighter and the rings on his power monitor pulsed beneath the open overshirt he wore, but Alex didn't consciously seem to realize what had been said, "He was testing the world."

"Did it pass?" Samson asked.

Alex looked down at his glowing fist for a moment as if it was not part of him and then he banished his powers. "I think it did," he said, quietly. "I think the people who survived were meant to. The weak were culled."

"Many of the strong were taken down too, Alex," Samson said, "Apocalypse's ideas of forced Darwinism is inherently flawed. It doesn't take into account free will."

"I know that!" Alex snapped, standing up, suddenly, his chair falling over with the movement. "I don't need anyone to tell me that! It's why he took our free will, why he made us believe we were free, but we weren't, we were slaves!"

The room had suddenly gotten very very very hot. Samson's green hair moved in the heat wind, curling slightly, and he said, "Then why are you still blaming yourself? Why are you still so angry with yourself?" He wasn't afraid that Alex would use his abilities on him, despite his anger. He was pretty sure he'd survive it. He'd survived worse than super heated plasma, after all.

Alex stopped, "This is psychiatrist stuff, isn't it," he muttered, "You're going to go back and report how unstable I am, how I can't lead this team--"

Samson held up his hand, "Alex, no one said you couldn't lead, in fact your team swears by you. Every one of them suggested that you were the backbone of X-Factor and without you, this would not work."

"They've been without me more than with me," Alex slumped, kicking his chair up into it's rightful permission and sitting in it, miserably, "They are better than they know."

"Sounds like their leader."

"Do you know how much I hate this?" Alex muttered.

Samson smiled, "I have a good idea. Tell me more about your team then."

"They're all great, all of them," Alex said, "They're fighting hard, so hard to make up for all of my mistakes."

"They seem to think they are making up for their own," Samson said.

"We should be saving the world, not saving ourselves." Alex looked at the large man, sullenly.

Samson cocked an eyebrow and said, "Alex, who said the two were mutually exclusive?"
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