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| Noble, Bishop; Ward | |
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| Topic Started: Feb 8 2014, 11:54 PM (982 Views) | |
| Tempest | Feb 8 2014, 11:54 PM Post #1 |
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Unregistered
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[align=center]PLAYER INFORMATION[/align] NAME:Bradness CONTACT:brad_hartl@yahoo.com or by P.M HOW YOU FOUND US: Topsite OTHER CHARACTERS ON THE SITE None RULES CODE: Blackbird CREDIT WHERE IT'S DUE: My own imagination on this one. [align=center]CHARACTER INFORMATION[/align] [align=center] ![]() Joe Manganiello[/align] BASIC INFORMATION CANON OR ORIGINAL: Original AFFILIATION: FULL NAME: Noble Joseph Bishop CODENAME: Ward NICKNAMES: Noe CURRENT AGE: 35 DATE OF BIRTH: 11/07 MARITAL STATUS: Single SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Homosexual BASE OF OPERATIONS: N/A TIME AT INSTITUTE: N/ A REGISTERED WITH SHIELD? No HOMETOWN: Carbonado, Washington KNOWN RELATIVES: Father: Jonathan Bishop Age: 57 Occupation: Military General Status: Alive Mother: Joyce Talbot Age: 53 Occupation: Supreme Judge Status: Alive PHYSICAL APPEARANCE HEIGHT: 6'1 BUILD: Athletic EYES: Hazel/Amber – Blue when using his power HAIR: Dark Brown DISTINGUISHING MARKS: None of worth CLOTHING STYLE: Rugged and rough around the edges, Noble’s look is that of your practical bad boy style. Favoring dark denim and leather to accent his look, Noble sense of style is both functional as it is practical. Leather offers a form of protection from most elements such as rain, wind, damage from scrapes, as well as providing him the ability to blend into low light environments. Denim, while not as durable as leather provides much more mobility and comes in several fits that gives him the means to alter his look for most occasions. Both of them are mainstays in his wardrobe but from time to time he can be found in a state of undress such as wearing nothing more than a pair of sweats and a wide range of t-shirts. He does not care for hats but shades of various shapes and styles are an almost daily requirement for his line of work as they allow him to observe without giving away much information that they eyes often do on a regular basis. UNIFORM: None needed. POWERS GENERAL DESCRIPTION: Vector Field At the age of thirteen when his powers manifested they took the form of a static field that lies close to his skin which he has thoughtfully named his vector field. Anything that enters this field he is able to redirect in any direction he wishes without so much as lifting a finger. This grants him the ability to repel most oncoming attacks by anything that can be repelled which includes both moving and non-moving objects. As his fields coats his entire ability to only include his clothing he must practically be hit or touch something in order to use his field. If hitting a person with his hands he is able to increase the strength of his blows by two to three times their normal strength while also causing a knock back effect. Touching an item and activating this effect mentally he is able to move objects much heavier than him up to two tons but this cause him to need to channel all of his power into his hands. Being a static field means that the field is always active and that he can only control the field to a certain and limited degree. He is able to focus his field into his feet and hands which allows him to have more hitting power as well as the ability to move either faster or jump higher than most average individuals. However by focusing his field into such concentrated areas the weaker the field becomes everywhere else which in a fight could mean life or death. The weakening of the field means that it is easier for attacks to eventually break through his field. By being attacked by multiple attacks from multiple directions means that his field becomes weaker as well making it harder for him to ward off attacks. His best offence is his ultimate defense but even that has its weak spots like most defenses. Enhanced Movement/ Mobility By concentrating his field into his feet he is able to increase his running speed exponentially but given his limitation he is only able to increase his speed up to 25 miles per hours for up to thirty minutes at a time if he paces himself. His fatigue toxin within the blood still builds up overtime meaning that constant running will cause him to eventually tire out, which in turns brings down his field’s effectiveness by nearly half. By pushing against air molecules he is able to achieve a low level of flight which comes in the form of “gliding” or levitation. He is able to travel up to a hundred yards before needing to land again. Once ground he is able to “launch” himself into the air for another flight but he is only able to achieve 5 flights within a single hour before fatigue toxin builds up in his body requiring him to rest. Flight is best achieved in a city with many buildings or in a rocky or hilly terrain. His vertical jump is currently fifty feet. WEAKNESS: While doing every day chores and an errand his shield usually stands at one hundred percent at any given point in time. At a hundred percent his shield can repel attacks from several directions at once but like most shield the effectiveness of his field weakens with each new attack. For every new attack his field drops in half, which means that the more blows the less knock back his shield has especially against continual pressing attacks. For example if some attempts to stab Noble he would be able to repel the attack without so much effort shrugging the attack off. However if pressed by five men with swords and being attacked in unison his shield will be unable to knock the attack back but rather may only “soften” the blow. That means he can still receive blows that can cause extensive bruising and potential broken bones. Attacks with a wider range of coverage can greatly weaken the strength of his field such as being hit by a car which would cause his shield to try and displace a large amount of coverage at a greater velocity. In addition the higher the velocity, moving speed, and object travels the more concentration is needed to slow the object to a complete halt. Anything exceeding 25 miles an hour can break through his field. In terms of energy based attacks, Noble is able to deflect most energy attacks with some ease. The wider the effect area the more his shield has to work in protecting him. Full body assaults would weaken his shield considerably but it would still be possible to shrug off the attack depending on the strength of blast. If an attack can render steel then his shield would most likely fail him the more spread out the attack is, but if an attack can only break wood of say medium strength, he would be able to push back more of the attack. Residual heat or sound from an attack will still affect him as these things have no true vectors of their own and so he must be careful to avoid them when possible. If unable to block them then he will suffer the same level of damage that the attack would normally have minus the concussive nature. Physical attacks on the other hand depend on the size and strength of his opponent. A punch from the hulk would be soften maybe a little but would otherwise destroy his field do to the size of Hulk's hand not to mention strength behind the blow. If a punch can shatter stone, concrete, brick then he would have some level of repelling the attacks though for a short period of time depending on the number of blows received. The magic number here would be around 10 to 15 blows before his shields fail him. If the blows can render steal or sturdier metals then the number would drop drastically to around 5 to 8 blows. Normal not enhanced blows from your average Joe could be repelled for a much longer period of time as they often do not have the strength behind the blows to drain his shields. Of course the more training someone has in hand to hand combat the more likely that they will know how to wear down their opponent first before going in for the knock. The more fatigue poison in his body the less effective his shield becomes as well. Noble’s vector field is connected to his endurance why or how is still a mystery but it seems upon closer look that his body causes unnecessary function to be shut off in order to extend the user’s life. His vector is merely a defensive quirk caused by a mutation in his genetic structure and as such his body will subconsciously shut it off if he has too much buildup of fatigue toxin within his body. Upon proper rest and recovery his body will expel the toxin and once more return to full power. Wearing out Noble is the easiest if not most practical weakness to exploit, whether it is pushing his body to its limitation or attacking him constantly from multiple directions. PERSONALITY Noble was rebellious in his youth but has grown to be more of a loner as his maturity and responsibility has grown over time. Still somewhat defiant of rules and laws, his early childhood still offers up some residual damage all of which can stem from living in a house with strict guidance. He grew to find most rules and laws to be almost suffocating to live with as it prevent him from enjoying life like all the other children his age when he was younger. However in light of this he has been shown to follow those who he respects completely and trust with his life though individuals who share these qualities are rare and hard to come by as he often times puts up walls to prevent others from getting close. Failure to win his respect and trust will cause him to ignore and combat any command that is given in which he does not agree with if placed on him from some of higher station that he does not care for as an individual or leader. This makes him a difficult member of any team but not impossible to eventually turn into an asset. Romantically, Noble is a dominant force in any relationship that he is in as he chooses to take on the responsibility of being the provider and protector over his partner. Masculine and strong he offers something for that lucky person to rely on when thing become too much as he choose to share in the burden no matter the size. Loyal through and through, when he does commit to someone only do they hold his heart unless of course they mistreat it in his care. His partner is the only one who will ever see him fully exposed and vulnerable making them the most important and well trusted individual in his life. Rarely does he fight with those he is in love with choosing to love verse hurt but he will not stand by if his partner’s choices are destructive to them or their relationship. In a fight Noble is careful to think about what is going on before rushing as his mutation is not something that has the staying powers of others. Choosing to defend until enough information is given he will then switch to offense when an opening presents itself. When or if an ally is in danger he will risk his own life to save them so long as they are deemed worthy of such sacrifice. While loyal to his cause he is not above betraying those who he finds unworthy of his talents flipping side in mid battle if pushed to do as much. While not a saint his moral compass does point more towards indifference so long as the money is good and the person he is working for meet his harsh judgment. HISTORY: PRE-APOCALYPSE Noble was raised in a strict household by two very dominating parents who hail from a generation in which a child is seen and not heard, and who obey without question. Of course these style of parenting while effective in Noble’s younger years, only breed resentment as the years grew on. This lead to noble’s defiance of authority figures including teachers and coaches who all sough to break him of his rebellious nature. Rarely bonding with his peers he spent most of his time alone which did not both them as he was more content with being by himself then spending time with immature brats. This could be a residual effect of his parent’s strict and heavy hand that he became almost cold and far too mature at an early age. Like most as he reaches puberty his mutation began to spring up, while at first it seemed more as a coincidence such as when his father would try and spank him which would result his blows being repelled back at him. His parents did not connect that their child was a mutant as they were true blood right wing Americans who did not think that they could produce a mutant “freak”. Oddly enough this was the age that Noble began to rebel as his desire to be somewhat normal and having the freedom that came with it grew with each passing year. This lead to more conflict in his life such as fights at school and harsher punishments from his parents particularly his father all of which that lead to physical interaction and because of those his mutation began to grow stronger. As such other began to take notice that they were unable to hit him as they expect and that most of their attacks were displaced. This led him to come to the realization that he was different which lead to experimentation. After months of feeling out his mutation he found that he was coated in some kind of shield or field if you would, that allowed him to at first to repel things that come in contact which would grow into moving in a direction that he chose. His father soon stopped laying his hand on his son as he found that he came out more worse for wear. With his father growing more frustrated and angry the two were soon destined to a massive blow out which resulted in his father being seriously injured and disowning his son for good at the right age of seventeen. Now alone and without a means to survive Noble took to the streets and did whatever it took to survive which some were worse than others. However with careful management of his money, he soon had enough to rent a small room over a small run down gym. Of course his land lord was also an old boxing coach, who took to the young boy who he saw himself in. With a promise to work hard and do a little training the coach offered the boy a job with a much more discounted monthly rent and gym membership. Noble was thankful and worked extraordinarily hard to pull his weight, going so far as dropping out of high school which he found pointless as he would learn all he need in the real world. As he became more skilled in hand to hand to hand combat he soon began to moonlight as a bouncer for some low end bars and clubs to earn a little extra money. Of course he excelled at that line of work given his mutant and soon his skills as a bouncer lead him to become a requested bodyguard. Of course soon the owner of the gym he was training in would die of a heart attack. The government would soon take the building do to back taxes forcing Noble out into the cold once more though this time he was better prepared for the world as he was slowly crawling up the social ladder in terms of clients. With no place left to go he found a nice apartment in a decent part of town. Here he did a little soul searching and decided to open up his own bodyguard agency, which would provide extra muscle and protection to those who were in need or could afford such a luxury. Starting off with only one other guy he took on several small jobs here and there but as he began making a name for himself he soon realized that in order to optimize his success he would need more bodies under his banner. So for the next couple of years he would recruit and train a small unit of men and women to fill out a fifteen man crew. A decent size for the sort of jobs he was taking on at the time but with more success more growth would surely be required to meet the demand. It was slow going at first, a new upstart company and all in a troubled economy had its ups and downs. But with determination he persevered and pushed own. His goal was to make a name for himself , and to raise the social ladder all the way to the top. For most of his childhood he had only earned enough to survive which was okay but he want to thrive now as he was growing into adulthood and reaching his prime. So he had to take chance and use his natural talents to do just that, thrive and climb. His team of course helped him along the way when and where they could which allowed a strong bond to be establish between them all. A bond that would be tested with a worldwide threat from a tyrannical mutant, Apocalypse bent on enslaving the world. DURING APOCALYPSE (April 7th through April 12th, 2009) When apocalypse showed up on the scene, Noble and his team was hired by a wealthy recluse to help keep him safe as well as his money and assets. While Noble's team could fight off any human or mutant threat it was just too difficult to keep the man safe when major natural disasters hit the city. The old man mention a bomb bunker that he had acquired that was several hours outside of the city in a somewhat safer location that they could all hunker down in. So with his team, Noble escorted the client from the city as quickly as they could be for things got worse. Locked away in an underground bunker in a remote area of the United States, Noble was forced to watch the world be torn apart by the sheer power of Apocalypse. The massive damage that was done was tremendous and effected so many and yet his thoughts only revolved around two individuals. His parents. He may not have always gotten along with them but he did feel a sense of concern for their wellbeing. Of course the arrival of the X-men in a last and final push was able to save the day which allowed him and his master to retreat back to the real world. Once back in the real world he learned that his parents were still alive and for that he was content to move on with his life. He left the service of the old man having spent more than enough time with a coward but not without making a small fortune which would propel him up the social chain and allow him to have enough for his own place. But it seems as though there was much work to be found in a destroyed and broken world. POST-APOCALYPSE Picking up the pieces of the broken world was no easy task. A lot of property damage had been done not to mention hundreds of lives had been lost in the destruction that was Apocalypse. Noble having some experience in construction from his early years on the street assisted where he could, even find a few lucrative jobs around his part of the world. Yet the demand for a personal body guard seemed to be in high demand given that danger could now be found around every corner. With massive chaos and damage to multiple structures it was not hard to find crime as looters came out of the wood work to make a quick buck and take advantage of those around them. This lasted for brief period in time until other organizations such as shield and various heroic groups intervened. Still the mental damage and paranoia that lingered was enough to increase business. Taking on several clients during this turbulent time in world history proved to be the best place to hone his skills as his vector field became stronger and more durable allowing him better control over his powers. His clients avoided harm and once more he rose even higher up the career as well as social ladders. With anti-mutant sentiment on the rise he had to be careful, his mutation of course was not obvious as other but it was better to be safe than sorry. He did not think telling anyone about being a mutant was any of their business as he was not one to give his enemies or strangers another reason to dislike him more than they already would naturally. Of course that was not the only thing in his life that he was in the closet about, as his self-acceptance as a gay man was a long slow process. Few suspect as he did not outwardly appear any different nor did he ever talk about his relationships with anyone. If anything the lack of talking about his personal relationship would be the only red flag which most chopped up to his private nature. For now it was better to just keep his head down and his mind busy with his company. PURIFIERS Anti -mutant sentiment soon reached a fever pitched as the organization known as the Purifiers showed up on the scene. Their arrival allowed lesser radicals a chance to take matters in their own hands and attack mutants whenever they could get away with it. Mutants vs. Humans meant that his company was working double time on most jobs as they attempted to keep their clients safe either from others or from there selves. More uncertainty lead to a higher demand for his services, a hire demand the great the earnings. The money was the best in times of war and conflict and as a soldier of fortune he found that being pushed to the limits excited him beyond all belief. He lived for the chaos and the not knowing if the next day would be his last he soon became infamous as one of New York’s most sought after security company. A title that he reveled in his new station and with an impressive team of guard below him he soon found his stride and upgrade himself to new levels in heights. While lost on both sides were great he and so many others lived another day. Mutant town, an up and coming hub for the mutant community, bore the most of the attacks from the radical group. The mayo and his anti mutant sentiment lead to a massive crack down on mutants through out the city. Noble was deeply concerned by this as it meant that he himself could be on the wrong side of this growing war between the powerful and powerless. Keeping his secrete took top priority and he did everything he could to keep that way. But keeping his mutant abilities a secret were the last of his problems as a member of the X-men were implemented in being a horseman for the Apocalypse. A heavy and serious crime for an one but one made worse by the fact that Havok was a mutant. The mayor would use this time to declare martial law on mutant town only to have a impressive dome encasing the small community keeping both mutnats in and others out. The world was on the edge and things did not look like they were going to be getting any better. That is when the bomb that killed countless innocents went off. A simple attack shook the world to the core and took the issue out to national and global outlets. The world was all watching and New York proved to be a stage for the ages as the players kept making entrances. While some fled the city others gathered to make a stand. More would have to shed blood before the conclusion took place. Xavier's was the next to come under fire, a once safe haven for young mutants, it was at this time that Noble lost two of his own men when on the other side of town they were gunned down for protecting a mutant. That night the liquor ran like rivers as he and the rest of his men drank to the memory of all they had lost. As havok's trial comes to an almost close more terror strikes the City as sentinels wreak havoc on the city. Friends and families make a stand but it would be the man who was once villianised for being a horsemen who would step in and save the day. Once more the evil of the world had been repelled but the world would never be the same again. Lines were drawn in the sand and Noble realized at this time that maybe hiding who he was and what he stood for was not doing him any favors. SKRULLS The Skrulls were the first threat that hurt his business as there control over mankind made his line of work obsolete. Unable to break the complacency that he was placed under he did all he was commanded to do just like the rest of the mindless masses. Unaware of what took place completely it was not until the skrulls had been pushed back and the news began to report what had happen to mankind. Of course after the effect of the complacency wave faded, he once more returns to normalcy as he sought only to rise higher in the social hierarchy of the world. The sky was the limit and soon he hoped to get into the most exclusive club in the world. CURRENT HISTORY The Hellfire club. A club for the social elite. He had heard of the organization for years but knew all too well that the only way in was with an invite. So in order to get recognized he has begun to work every social contact he can to amass as much wealth as he can to help get him close to someone with the authority to let him. Once in he would do whatever it took to secure the club as one of his top clients offering his own security teams to handle the protection that they deserved, the best that money could buy. Until he could achieve his goal he has been managing his team he has begun once more train his abilities in hopes of pushing them even further than before. However while in the midst of training more nut jobs provided him a means to make a bit more money as viral videos sprung up all over the web of citizens attempting to kill sups. Of course with more chaos meant business once more picked up for him and his company. No one knew he was a sup and so he was safe for the most part but he did have a few mutant and superhuman clients whose mutations were not enough to offensively or defensively keep them safe. It was practically a sup witch hunt. Of course that was least of his problems as a new organization begins taking over the world. Attack on political strong point world over by a mysterious group causes mass panic. Once more the world is shrouded in darkness as heroes and villains clash in the streets. He of course stays out of the fray finding that getting involved would merely be bad for business especially given that gravity of the new conflict. Of course the X-men would save the day and the world is left to pick up the pieces. the loss of several of his agents and clients has left Noble slightly wounded as he grieves for his fallen friends. But not for long as he soon honors his friends for fulfilling their duties and laying their lives down for the sake of their clients. He begins to look to the horizon now and hopes to join the fray as it is the only smart thing to do these days, to be affiliated with a truly powerful group. Now while working on once more rebuilding his business he has begun a search to find a group worthy to join. So many existed he had to simply find one that provided him with the best opportunity possible. Chaos flowed everywhere, Namor the sovereign king of Atlantis had been a culprit in a good part of the current conflict. Other members of the Illuminati also flexed their might shaking the world as we know it. Noble was further convinced that he would soon be dragged into the fray. His business was destroyed in a conflict and even more of his team was killed in the line of duty. It was now just him and a small team of four guys and a woman. Utterly exhausted and sick of all the conflict happening around him he leaves his company in his best friends hand as he begins to make his pilgrimage to find himself. It was at this time that the final conflict took place that would leave the world utterly lost and shaken. But before he goes off in search of a group he comes out of the closet to his friends as not only a gay men but also a mutant. Once more on his own and with a decent amount of savings to hold him over he begins his search. SAMPLE RP POST: Noble had the night off. A rare thing in his line of work and one that he would not let slip from his grasp. Luke one of his top agents had taken over a few of his clients in order to give the older man at least a small break. Vector Security, his personal company, had been doing well over the last couple months in securing new and old clients alike for various job details. There was no global or even local threat that had people running out hiring personal guards which had caused things to slow a bit but with so many wealthy individuals moving into the city every year the books were still in the green which did his mind some good. He had poured every penny that he had earned back into the company to make it the best that he could only taking enough to survive comfortably. He had goals and aspirations in life and the most important now was attaining a way into the hellfire club. The club was the IT club of the city and everyone who was anyone had membership to the club save him. If he could get before the right people and convince them to grant him entrance then he would have access to some of the most influential individuals in the world. All of whom he could offer the luxury of his fearless teams to keep them safe, and with more money than they knew what to do with Noble would finally make a name for himself in the world. To be someone of worth was all he ever wanted, to be desired yet unattainable, to have everyone know his name. For a kid from the streets that was everything. Having been thrown out and disowned at the ripe age of seventeen he had to learn to work hard and fight his way through life to get a leg up in the world. If he could not obtain something he would merely work that much hard to change his fate. So far he has done well, but doing well was not going be enough at least not at this point in his life. He had to do great! Picking up his glass he sip slow and enjoying the all too familiar burn of alcohol as it coated everything it touched on the way down, warming him slightly. His hazel eyes scoured the room more out of habit rather than interest as he sized up the small bar and all of the patrons inside. Having started off as a bouncer he had learned the all too familiar body language that those who had too many drinks often gave off. A slightly wobble to their steps, have closed or blood shot eyes, slower movements, sometimes height sexual expression or fits of emotion. All were common in a place like this, of course as the night waged on the number of drunks would grow until the bar closed its door promptly a four in the morning. Smiling to himself, he realized how little sleep he had when he was a bouncer. Late nights and even earlier morning he used to help out at Pop’s Gym before the old man died and the government bulldozed the place down. The retied fighter had been up to his eye balls in debt and yet he allowed him to live over the gym for practically nothing. If only he knew the truth then maybe he could have help eased some of the financial burdens the old man had to deal with. Then again Pops was not one to take a hand out; he was a firm believer of “getting yourself out of the whole you dug”. The guy was more of a father to him than his own old man. Man, how he wished pops was here now? What would he say to about the state of the world now? Alien Invasions, Religious radicals, cosmic entities! Noble could hear the old man as if he was sitting right beside him. “Sonny Boy, the world is going to shit and quick and their aint enough toilet paper to go around.” Smirking in to his cup he took another sip. The old man would have been right of course, the world was going to shit. With so many sups running about making a mess in attempt to save the day, it was hard not to believe in the worse. Before they showed up on the scene the world had to learn to handle it self. So what if someone died here or there, it was survival of the fittest in his opinion. Of course he was one of the sups but rarely did he use his powers to save the world from a major threat. No that would be outside his comfort zone, he had enough going on in his life for all of that. He was content with where he was going in life and did not need to through on a spiffy spandex or leather suit to make himself feel better about the cards he was dealt. With great power came great responsibility. What a load!? If you could not take care of yourself who would? No one. At least that was what his life lessons had taught him. Pulling out his wallet he pulled out a twenty while downing the rest of his drink. Slam the cash on the counter he gave the bartender a nod of his head to tell him to keep the change as he pulled on his coat before heading out in to the cold. “Shit, its freezin balls out here!” ,Was his first reaction as he nestled further into his leather jacket before making his way up the street. Living this far north had its perks but winter was not one of them that were for sure. He once spent a few weeks in Arizona and loved it but with bulk of his business back home he did not want to have relocated to the middle of nowhere just to avoid winter. Though if he was not tied down it was there he could see himself living out the rest of his days. A Ranch in the middle of nowhere, off the grid? What was there not to enjoy, people annoyed him almost constantly on a daily basis but to make a living he had learned the art of tuning out. He was so good at it that he fooled almost everyone. Luke was too old of a friend to pull one over and so he was one of the few that he could not tune out but that was only because the man refused to be ignored. Having saved his life on numerous occasions in the past he had earned his respect and with that came the privilege to gripe at him as he saw fit. Rounding the corner he was unaware that someone was following him, after he was not the only one on the streets at one in the morning in the city that never sleeps. But after a half of a block he had turned to look at a passing car when he saw the man out the corner of his eyes. Not a paranoid man he shrugged the guy off as he went about his business but after two more city block and they guy still tailing him something just screamed out that something was up. Deciding to pick up the pace and weave in and out of a few buildings to see if it was coincidence he soon found out that the man was after something. “Hey give me all your money!” the gravel voice of the man stalking him said as noble managed to find his way straight into a dead end. Turing to face the man he saw the gleam of metal that his gun cast in the low light as the pale face of some strung out junky met his own. The smell of smoke and filth wafted toward him causing his stomach to turn and the manner in which the guy’s hand was shaking raised some alarm. Putting his hands in his pocket’s Noble looked the man in the eye, who had to look down after a moment finding it hard to look the larger man in the face for more than a few moments at a time. “You heard me give me all your money or I will shoot!” Once more the gravelly voice coughed out though Noble could tell that the man was not sure he would be able to pull the trigger. It was no easy thing shooting a man dead; you had to commit your soul to it if you hope to live with the guilt after wards. “No. No beat it before you do something you’r gonna regret!” Noble said in a stern voice causing the lesser man to flinch slightly. Clear it was not enough for the guy to lower the gun and just as Noble was about to try and jump forward to slap the gun out of the man’s hand, the idiot had summoned up some strength as he pulled the trigger. The shout rang out in the small face and after a moment time to slow down. Noble saw the flash of the gun causing him to instinctively flex his muscles but his mind had already assured him that he would not be killed by the bullet as the small metal ball made contact with his vector field. For a brief moment the bullet had nearly come to a stop but soon it turned on itself and ricochet back toward the gunmen. The look of confusion was painted clear as day on the guy’s face as the bullet struck him in the throat. The shock of it all soon took hold as he reached up and touched the wound pulling his hand away as it shook almost violently as the look of his own blood caused his mind to come to terms that he had been shot. Managing to hit a major artery his body began to spill blood everywhere as his body began to slowly shut down as a last ditch effort to save the man’s life. Noble soon relaxed instinctively as he walked over to the dying man as he shook his head in disbelief. If only the man would have listened to him in the first place then maybe this would have turned out differently but it hadn’t and now it would cost him his life. Stepping over the body Noble made his way back out to the main street as he flipped his phone open and dialed nine- one- one. The world was really going to hell. So much for a full night’s sleep. “ Yes, I would like to report a shooting. No I think the guy shot himself…” {End} |
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| Tempest | Feb 8 2014, 11:59 PM Post #2 |
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Unregistered
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The biggest Issue that I have had with the application is the history, section. I did get some information from a staffer as to the general idea and feel of each major event. Now if I have taken to big of a liberty in terms of how big the event really where then let me know and I can scale it back a bit. I can also add more information as need with no issues, it was just a lot of information and having not been around during these plots makes it a bit hard to try and figure out where my character plays apart in all of this. |
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| Cyclops | Feb 11 2014, 08:45 AM Post #3 |
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Punches from the Punch Dimension
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This is going to be a bumpy ride, so buckle up. We need the name of your Playby.
No. Explain that name for us, because that is not a name anyone has ever had ever, and it makes me want to scour the internet for what character you are basing him off of. Give him a normal name or explain why it is strange.
No. Don't tell us how to feel about him. Let us decide. I might not find him elusive. Just describe his clothes please. Powers/Weaknesses: These are unusual powers, and that's good, we like that. However we need a heck of a lot more detail if they're going to fly. A couple of hand and foot movements doesn't help us. How long do the effects last? How many effects are they? What are the effects for each movement? Yes, we need that level of detail for first time players, because we don't know how you play, and for all we know, suddenly a finger flick has the strength of the cosmic wind. Don't roll your eyes, worse has been done here when something has passed us. Personality:
Once again, don't tell us how to feel about him. What if we don't find him a comfort.
But isn't he homosexual? I know that not all gay men are swishing, lisping, fashion designers, but this just seems odd and awkward. History: Here's where the bulk of the problems are. During Apocalypse: If he's in New York during the Horsemen attacks, a single paragraph is unacceptable. Most of War's damage was done in Brooklyn, but his soldiers headed into the city as well. How did he deal with that? Then when the hurricane and subsequent tsunami hit the island, what did he do then? Purifiers:
How? Was he depressed? Ashamed? Did he just walk away or what? Skrull: The entire world was put under the Complacency Wave. We need to know how he dealt with that. Did the initial invasion before the wave scare him? Was he excited? What did he do while complacent? How did he feel about the heroes attacking his saviors? Current History:
Because none of us have ever seen Arrow. No. He's not Oliver Queen. I'll by the dance academy but how did it become well known? It sounds like he barely started it last year. Also, no where in the current history do I see any of the events of 2013. Go back to the history, and read all the events that happen starting New Years 2013. If he is in New York, he is going to be affected... a lot. It needs to be addressed, especially if he is going to be a vigilante. Talk to us in the cbox, or on AIM, we're here to help you. |
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| Betsy Braddock | Feb 17 2014, 07:36 PM Post #4 |
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Telepathy (I'm not a bloody ninja)
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Is this app still being worked on? Please let us know or make the edits by Feb 24th or we'll have to move it to denied due to inactivity. |
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| Tempest | Feb 20 2014, 01:02 AM Post #5 |
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Unregistered
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Please forgive my absences with my internet down I was unable to get online to respond. I am currently amending this application. I should have changes post soon. |
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| Tempest | Feb 21 2014, 01:38 AM Post #6 |
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Unregistered
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Okay I have essentially rewrote my entire application. To be honest that last application, after reading it several times, I have found to be complete and utter garbage. I want to apologize for putting up such trash and allow me to put fourth a better face. Please grill me about the powers if you do not understand, When dealing with vectors it can be a little rough to pound out the specifics. I tried to give as many limitations as I could . I also reworked his name. Sorry again for the poor choice. That was a clear noob move and I have slapped myself for it already. |
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| Betsy Braddock | Feb 22 2014, 09:05 PM Post #7 |
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Telepathy (I'm not a bloody ninja)
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Hi Bradness, I know you’ve overhauled things but I have points to being up again. Please bear in mind this is to help you fit in and round out your character; if you want to discuss the things I bring up, please contact me and I will explain or we can work things out. 1. We still need the name of your playby. It just helps when people look at your app. Put the name under the picture. 2. Why the name Noble? Is it just a rich parents thing? I don’t want us to get held up over something so simple as a name, but imagine living for 35 years called Noble and how people might react to that name, then decide if it’s really suitable. Of course, he might end up going by his middle name as that’s a real world solution to having a weird first name. 3. Parents. So, his mother is 44 and his father is 47? That makes them 9 and 12 respectively when he was born. 4. The powers look better but you need to maybe look at them and work out some more solid definitions when it comes to saying what he can/can’t deflect. Using an example of five men with swords, while it isn’t implausible, well he’s more likely to get attacked by ice/fire/energy/super strength punches. Think more in terms of that than just traditional combat. 5. Personality is better than before, but be careful about balancing his rebellious and wild streaks with the maturity that someone of his age and experience would be expected to have. 6. History: He became mature and cold at an early age but he hung around with immature brats? I get the whole rebellion thing and I get hanging out with other kids etc, but why does he want to hang around with immature brats if he’s the opposite almost? Then after he gets disowned he happens to find a room above a gym that happens to be owned by the coach, who gives him reduced rates and coaching? I really don’t mean to be disrespectful, but you are sticking to a lot of comic cliches, as was mentioned before with your last version. If he’s 35, that means he would have been around 30 when Apocalypse happened, meaning you leave off around 12 or 13 years of history between him being disowned and the plot events. We at least need a paragraph more of what he was doing for this expanse of time. This section is better than before, but beware cliches is all I’m saying. Apoc: Why and how did he get into the bunker? The attacks happened suddenly without warning to the general population, so you need to acknowledge that first. Post Apoc: This time period was actually a long one, around a year and a half. While there would have been some chaos and looting etc at first, it would not have continued mainly because of organisations like SHIELD. However him working as a bodyguard makes sense as people would have been paranoid. If his organisation is well known amongst the a-list of New York that implies that we should all know about it, so be careful about presuming such things. How did he do so well as a mutant in this time? Anti-mutant sentiments were quite high after all. Was he in the mutant closet? Purifiers: Why were his company fighting off attacks? Which attacks? Purifiers made coordinated attacks on strategic mutant targets that were carefully planned such as the bombing at Xavier’s, the attacks on Mutant Town and the capture of individual targets. Don’t worry, I’m not saying that his employees would be sat on sidelines, but we need to see a better understanding of the plot. The Purifiers were no joke and not weak. They were armed with Genoshan technology and eventually we found out they had sentinels too that ended up attacking New York City. Current: If you want to get into the Hellfire Club then you need to make a pitch to myself or the players of the Black or Red Courts, depending which one. I’d advise you not to unless you have a very specific plan, because Hellfire can be difficult for first timers without a plot. Also, he’d probably get eaten alive. I was waiting to say this, but please, if you want to start as an Other and work out what faction you want him to go into, that is absolutely fine, but it needs to come from YOU. You need to coordinate with the faction of your choice and do the OOC work and reasoning as to why he should join a team. We can share the burden with you in game in terms of recruitment, but we are so big and so busy please understand he won’t so happen to get noticed and recruited. Other than that, this section could do with a little more detail on the plot but I appreciate that’s difficult. You have a solid idea about what he does throughout the history but we need to see some more plot details throughout. This app isn’t terrible, it's a decent enough base that just needs wrapping into our history and style. Please read the site history carefully again if you need to and read in game threads and apps, if you haven’t, especially those around where you want to potentially place your character. If you can, please run a spell check on this too as there are a number of typos here and there such as spelling mistakes and improper capitalisations. You don’t need to be 100% right on these, but it just makes it nice and tidy. Again, if you need help please contact me or talk to someone else on staff. We’re not here to slam, we are here to help and we will if you need it. |
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| Tempest | Feb 23 2014, 04:08 AM Post #8 |
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Unregistered
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1. Chris Salvatore. I added to just below the picture, I honestly miss where to place it and in my mind assumed that it was merely going to be claimed in a face claim. Easy Fix though. 2.Noble is a unique name, but no more unique than say faith, grace, Hope, etc. His father valued valor and as such the name was something his father choice even though it was atypical. His mother had wanted to name him after her father, Jonathan but found that that her husband was unwilling to budge and so she simply complied. As it is an unusual name he was often called Noe (pronounced : "no") by his friends. as he grew up he was often referred to by his last name, Bishop , a common trait shared in military and law enforcement as a last name is easier to differentiate between two individuals with a shared first name. Some still call him Noble, but more often than not most will refer to him as Noe or Bishop. 3. I was struggling with age and so I merely failed to correct their age during my edits. I think the new ages will work more in terms of realism. 4. I added two more paragraphs to the weakness that explain what people should expect when fighting him with energy and physical attacks. I am trying very hard with the powers, I originally wanted to write a character that could control water or air but found that in the banned powers you have psionic abilities as a banned power. I could not figure out how to work the ability to use water or air into a solid power without it being some form of mental kinesis which is common place for such characters. My current power is complex and I am not sure how well it will work but that is why I am seeking your help and guidance heavily on this part. I can change out his powers but I first need to know where you guys are at in terms of what is allowed or not. 5. I reworded the first paragraph to try and offer up some balance there. Original this character was supposed to be a great deal younger , late teens early twenties, but do to inconsistency and mutant power issues I had to bump the age up quite a bit to make it all work out with in the realm of reason. Clichés. I am not attempting to be cliché in creating this character, the last one was cliché and because of it I had to scarp the whole application. I try very hard to be original and different but sometimes it is unavoidable. After all marvel universe is so expansive that it hard to avoid doing something that has not been done a thousand times before. For example, when disowned I could have easily had him run the streets for a much longer period of time but in doing so I found that it would be more cliché then him finding a positive role model to kind of help guide him. An old man in his late fifties taking care of a disowned seventeen year old homeless boy giving him a place to stay and a couple defense lessons seemed more original to me. Self-defense is a common tool used to raise confidence, self-esteem, as well as teach responsibility to those who have none or struggle with such issues. I choose boxing as mix martial arts is so over done on sites like these that it almost is overkill. He also had to still pay part of his way in terms of rent and class fees, after all the old man is not really wealth as you find out later in the history I believe. The defiant/loner card is a bit over played but again given his powers, early childhood, and subsequent career it fit much more than other archetypes. To positive and sunny would give a reader conflicted messages especially given his line of work. Death and Danger alters individuals usually for the worse and so for him to be a bodyguard he had to learn to put up walls. To negative or villainous, he would be no better than a common street thug and I when I sat down and thought about I was uncomfortable with that idea of being simply ruthless. If you are familiar with the alignment system, a character like this could only truly exist as a true neutral character. 6. Pre history 1) I think you may have misunderstood, due to his cold and somewhat distant nature he did not hang out with kids his own age as he found them all to be nothing more than Brats. I was trying to explain his early lack of social skills and to establish that isolation that is a present in his personality and interaction with other characters in the present. 2) I talked about the cliché in the above section label cliché. But I have heard what you are trying to say clearly. 3)Added another paragraph to this section. This new paragraph explains how his company came into place as I found it to be more reasonable to have the company to start at this point in time than later down the road. It allows him to be more established by the current date. But to summarize that 12-13 year gap, he moved to a new part of town, began building a name for himself as well as starting off a small company with a friend. As his name grew he need a larger team and began to train and recruit said team. Outside of taking the odd job here and there and continually training not much happened at this point in time. No kids, or partners worth mentioning, and being a drop out he did not attend college so he does not have to worry about those sorts of things. 5-6 years to build a solid business structure and another 5-6 years building the name and brand not to mention acquiring a larger pool of clients would be typical for this kind of work. Especially with little to no military or law enforcement training or connections. Apoc. I have established that the bunker was the property of a client, when the natural disaster took effect Noble and his team would have lead the man to the safest place they could. A private bunker several hours outside of the city would be the ideal place to hunker down. What I was trying to establish is his lack of participation here. I am not comfortable with him taking part in something that I have not role played out as things could have went differently if he joined in the plot. So the best solution was for him to avoid what he could and merely ride out the chaos till someone else saved the day. This is more so important as he would have not had any affiliations until current date where he is looking to join a faction. Post Apoc. I made some minor edits to this section. I added a paragraph explaining him being in the closet as both a gay man as well as a mutant. He lives a private life and has not fully accepted being gay or a mutant and so he tends to keep these facts close to his heart in fear of further rejection from the outside world. Wanting to be on the top of the food chain and becoming a well establish and respected man he fears that if others find out that they would react much to the same way that his father reacted. While he did not have a great relationship with his father, the psychological need to be accepted is still present and grows more and more over the years. Purifiers I made a few small edits here and I hope it reads a little better. I guess in my mind I knew what I wanted to say here but it did not translate well to the page. Current I removed mention of the HFC so that I can first get accustomed to the site before jumping into bed with any faction just yet. Most sites I have been on ask that new members join a group as soon as possible so I merely put that line in there to help explain where the character mindset would be at first. Not to mention provide a more defined path. However your suggestion is a better option as I realize how little I have connected with the members here on the site yet. I have tried to make the needed edits as you have suggested as well as explain why I have worded or described something that I have placed in the application. Character Development is a passion and I do take a lot of care into creating a balanced character. I have tons of information on this character already stored elsewhere that I will use as a reference and build upon in character. But I also understand the need of a solid base to start off with that allows other a clear picture of whom and what Noble is and represents. I must thank you for being so understanding. To a new member especially one that has been on other sites it takes a little time to adjust and restructure a though process to fit to a new environment. So much information to read through and work with that it can at times be somewhat disorientating. I value your critics and have no problems working with you in addressing the weak points in my application. I just want to make clear that it is not my goal to argue with anyone nor do I set out to try and copy concepts that have already been set in place. If it appears that way then I am deeply sorry and merely pointing them out allows me to notice them and work through them as a writer. I also ran the application through spell check another time. I picked up a few more errors that I missed and made changes to grammar. Sometimes spell check does not catch everything so I apologize ahead of time if there are still some errors lurking. |
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| Betsy Braddock | Feb 23 2014, 10:09 AM Post #9 |
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Telepathy (I'm not a bloody ninja)
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You've done a lot of work on this and been very agreeable, which is great to see, so now I'm good on most things in this application now. However, the Purifiers section and the Current section could possibly do with some work: Purifiers went a little deeper than attacks on mutants; the group were a very organized sect of religious zealots and their actions caused ripples that went further than just attacks. For example, the then Mayor of NYC (Matthew Risman) brought in a lot of anti-mutant crackdowns. Havok was outed as the Horseman War by a SHIELD mole and he was arrested and put on trial. The Scarlet Witch, in response to Matthew Risman declaring martial law on Mutant Town, put a protective dome up that blocked everyone out of the district (and kept everyone in). The final attack that the HFC and the Brotherhood launched on the Purifiers home base ended up with sentinels that the Purifiers had being unleashed on NYC. I'm not expecting you to refer to every incident that happened in the plot or add a page or anything like that, but it was a detailed plot and there are many elements to take into consideration, especially if he was around NYC. If you're confused, I can be a little more specific over AIM or PM. Current history is in a similar situation. You've got the basic gist down but a lot happened. Try reading this summary that charts most of what went on for a little inspiration. http://z4.invisionfree.com/Xrevolution/ind...showtopic=13913 Again, I don't expect you to add reams of information, but how about adding details about the insomnia plot for instance, or even just referencing how he felt about the earth shaking over the final battles ( the info for which is here: http://z4.invisionfree.com/Xrevolution/ind...showtopic=14380 ) This seems like a lot of info, I know, but the gist is a little more clarification in these two sections will go a long way. Again, if you need help all you need to do is ask, don't feel like you have to struggle at it if you get confused. On one last note, do you want me to change your username to Ward or Noble Bishop? |
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| Tempest | Feb 25 2014, 09:02 PM Post #10 |
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Unregistered
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Sorry for the delay, It just so happen that it is my bf's birthday and I just got a promotion all in the last couple of days and so I am trying to get the real life in order before turning my attention back to my writing. I expanded the purifer section and current section. Also if you change my name to ward that would be wonderful. |
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| Betsy Braddock | Feb 26 2014, 10:15 PM Post #11 |
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Telepathy (I'm not a bloody ninja)
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Sorry I haven't gotten to changing your account name yet, but I will once I've finished in here. There are still some fuzzy patches - in one instance you also refer to Havok as an X-man, but that's close enough - however I think you've shown you're willing to find stuff out and progress, so I'm going to assume you'll show the same interest in game and any kinks will work themselves out. I'm going to stamp you, but another mod might want you to change things. [S T A M P] |
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| Cyclops | Mar 6 2014, 09:12 AM Post #12 |
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Punches from the Punch Dimension
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So sorry this was missed. Let's get you playing. [S T A M P] |
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7:32 PM Jul 11