Paper Mario - The Lands of Enchantment

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Paper Mario - The Lands of Enchantment - PMTLOE
Topic Started: Jul 2 2006, 09:21 PM (70 Views)
Raro	Jul 2 2006, 09:21 PM Post #1
The Creator Posts: 1,515 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: May 25, 2006	PROLOGUE It was just any normal day in the mushroom kingdom when a call arrived from outside. Apparently Parakerry, the mailkoopa was there. And with a letter from the princess of course! Dear Mario, I need your help! Bowser seems to be getting msarter and smarter! He makes these plans! It's completely not like him and he's been assaulting my castle for weeks! My toad armies cannot keep up with it and resorting to you... I'm afraid by the time you read this, we will have already all been captured... A exprression of horror rose on Mario's face, Bowser? Smarter? Hmm... He rushes into the house to tell Luigi but he is nowhere to be found. Mario rushes back outside, he shows Parakerry the letter, "Guess it's time we worked as a team again eh?" Parakerry says (refer to paper mario one, parakerry was one of Mario's partners) "Guess so" And as he said those words, Bowser arose from the depths in his Koopa Copter with Kammy following close behind. Luigi was in his grasp tied to the back. Mario grabs onto parakerry and they try some luck in chasing after him but they fail only to end up in toad town. "Hello Mario, nice to see you again!" Tayce T. greets mario and hands him a present of gratitude, "It's a cake, baked fresh myself!" Mario accepts it, thinking it would come of use later, then bands off with parakerry to rescue the princess and his brother, as well as recruit his group back together for another great adventure of!!! PAPER MARIO! - THE LANDS OF ENCHANTMENT!!! (I will begin chapter one soon)
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AbyssNess	Jul 3 2006, 06:46 AM Post #2
Level 1 Posts: 31 Group: Members Member #17 Joined: June 26, 2006	It seems good, but one thing you should try is to avoid making it too linear. The last Paper Mario games were excellent, but being video games, they progressed in a straight line: Reach level. Beat boss. Next level. Beat boss. Next level. In some cases of course it was a little more complicated than that, but try to avoid simple "levels."
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Raro	Jul 4 2006, 07:33 AM Post #3
The Creator Posts: 1,515 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: May 25, 2006	Thanks for the tips! Though I was going for the making it sound like a video game. More like the storyline of a video game going through everything. (maybe nintendo will look at it! I have posted in a forum with another nintendo staff member in it!)
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Sakura Haruno	Jul 6 2006, 07:56 AM Post #4
Chunnin Posts: 1,026 Group: Admin Member #15 Joined: June 14, 2006	pretty good , well if this was some important paper you might wanna work and your spelling.....



Kenji Ausamatu	Jul 6 2006, 10:13 AM Post #5
Level 3 Posts: 99 Group: Members Member #21 Joined: July 1, 2006	Yes even though your writing about a game if you make it not feel like a game, with no set levels or bosses, it'll be much better in my opinion... Also for enemies... you shouldn't have bosses just be more powerful... they should also have storylines of their own... why are they evil... they just woke up one day and started eviling it up? No one dose that... there should be reason and heart behind your villians... that way when the big battle comes down to it, both characters are not willing to back down, the tension and drama... Thats what would make it better in my opinion. It's a cute story though.
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