Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to In The Box. We hope you enjoy your visit.


You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
Giles Smith investigates.
Topic Started: May 14 2008, 05:50 PM (23 Views)
Sheddy
Member Avatar
Fun Gestapo

To get straight down to the important issue - that new Petr Cech goalkeeping kit. Scientists are now asking whether this is the first time a Premier League 'keeper's jersey-and-shorts combo has been visible from space.

We're not sure, and it could be a while before the definitive evaluations are in on this one. But early reports from Sunday suggest that Cech was at least visible from Streatham, which is like space, in many ways, but a bit closer.

Also, motorists on the Hog's Back near Guildford that day allegedly picked up an orange glow in the sky to the north east that can only have been attributable to the new shirt on its first outing.

The theory - as explained in the match programme - is that that particular, intense shade of tangerine spreads faster than any other colour in the vision of a striker bearing down on the goal. It means that Cech appears, cunningly, to be bigger than he already is.

Point proved. He wasn't exactly small to start with. In the new strip he looked positively monumental.

Imagine if this technology had been available, back in the club's earliest days, to the legendary Willie 'Fatty' Foulke. Had the club's 22-stone shot stopper, and inaugural captain, had access, in 1905, to the requisite amount of punishingly bright Clima-Flo material? well, talk about parking a bus in front of the goal. Oppositions wouldn't have bothered coming out of the dressing room.

Still, it's good to see Chelsea once again leading the way, strip-wise. We cornered the market in football-related day-glo with this year's electric yellow change strip. We're pushing it even further with the new goalkeeper's outfit. It's all part of the fearlessly hi-tech quest for excellence which has always defined this club and always will.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
« Previous Topic · Chelsea · Next Topic »
Add Reply


         

Latest BBC News
« »